Is it shocking when the father ends up more affected by his child's death than the mother?

[ChicanaChick]

Well the mother is obviously forever affected. We carry the baby for 9 month so a bond has already been formed from the beginning. Then comes the nurturing part. Mother's Day is even celebrated more than Father's Day.

However, someone once shared about how a father can be just as affected too. I was just reading about how a woman lost her two cousins (a 16 year-old girl and 11 year-old boy). They both got hit by a van and died instantly. The mother was obviously deeply affected and inconsolable, expressing her wish to not live anymore. Meanwhile the father is supposely strong and not displaying too much grieve; comforting his wife. The dude served in the military. Here is the twist to the story: to everyone's shock, the dude pulled the trigger on himself the following year. He couldn't take it anymore. So basically he was even more affected than the mother, to the point of outing himself.

In the end, meanwhile the mother continues to live on, the man committed suicide. Is this shocking? When the father ends up more affected than the mother?

[HighValue]

Not shocking since most of the time, men care more than women. That is why many women will sacrifice their family for selfish reasons, but many men sacrifice their happiness and health for their family.

[Sun_Kim-Ai]

No, it's not shocking.

Everybody is different and reacts differently to grief.

[ChicanaChick]

True. Though the narrator of that story (the woman's uncle) was very shocked when the man committed suicide. He didn't seem like that guy that would break down. He emotionally stronger than his wife, in better control of his emotions, stoic. The twist ending was shocking. While his wife (whom had expressed her wishes to die) continues living on, the man (whom was comforting his wife and had no signs of being suicidal) kills himself suddenly without warning.

[Anonymous]

Men commit suicide more than women , cuz men don't know how to express their emotions

[ChicanaChick]

Pretty much it. The dude likely was too busy comforting his wife and everyone else that he bottled it all up. It's sad he didn't get help.

[Opinion Owner]

It is sad , I feel bad for the wife

[Opinion Owner]

thanks for mho

[Anonymous]

No. Guys commit suicide successfully a lot more often than girls.

[Anonymous]

Most parents would be greatly affected by their child dying...

So, no, it isn't shocking. What a weird question.

[ChicanaChick]

I know both are greatly affected but the narrator of the story (the woman's uncle) was shocked when her uncle (the one that didn't show much emotions... stoic and emotionally stronger than the wife) ends up the one affected the most to the point of committing suicide.

[ChicanaChick]

Since the wife was expressing more emotions, a lot more grieve in the beginning and her wishes of dying, she seemed the one more affected.

[Nikki1989]

That wouldn't surprise me at all.

[In_Trance]

no...