Is this harmless spoiling or something that should never be said, not even as a joke?

[Vesuvius87]

My mother likes spoiling my son more than she ever did with my brother and I. It's understandable that she's very happy since he's her first and only grandchild. However sometimes she tells my son (now 6 months old) the following:

''Kenny, your mom and dad aren't ever going to hit you. You're so lucky. You'll get to do whatever you want to''.

I hope my son doesn't ever get the wrong idea that not ever getting hit by parents means permissive parenting. It doesn't. Just because there won't be corporal punishment doesn't mean he can do whatever he wants to. Would you consider what she's saying harmless spoiling or something that should never be said?

Updates

6 mo

I'm not into physical punishent but neither into excessively spoiling a child with rewards.

[roy_ricky09]

What the fs wrong with you... He's 6 months... All grandmother's say stuff like that and you shouldn't worry too much.
Your over protectiveness will do more harm on his future than anyone else

[Vesuvius87]

I've noticed you seem defensive on other posts too. Perhaps I act like that because it's my first time as a mother and really want to get it right so my son can have a better upbringing than I did.

[roy_ricky09]

There is no right or wrong way. Just let the child be

[Vesuvius87]

True. I just think each generation (exp the newer) wants better than than the past.

[Anonymous]

Like a 6 month old knows what "permissive" means.😆

[Vesuvius87]

While he's too young to know that word, he did seemed to understand when softly speaking to him that it hurts after he scratched my face. According to Google it did stated that while you definitely have to be gentle, you shouldn't laugh when he's starting to scratch your face. It did said that starting at 6 months or 7 months, babies can grasp what a gentle no means.

[Opinion Owner]

I think what your mom said was wrong (but not necessarily detrimental) it does undermine you. But even if you live to be 100 and your mom is somehow still alive, you will always be on some level a child to her. So try to understand that and forgive her for what she said.

I don't think in the grand scene of thigs it'll have a measurable affect unless she is constantly saying things like this. And even then it's all about the OVERALL message the child receives.

My mother was always taking shots at my dad verbally with us. Buy she loved my dad, it was evident. And she made sure we respected my dad, even if she didn't always (😆).

So I'm saying as long as your mom doesn't constant derride your parenting I think it'll be fine.

[Vesuvius87]

True. Once my son gets older (2+ years and older) and she were to still say that, then that would be concerning.

[NathanDavis]

that's just the grandma thing to do... lol

[Vesuvius87]

yeah. Hopefully she doesn't say that too much when he starts talking, then it wouldn't be ok.

[NathanDavis]

your kids should always listen to you first... if you raise them like that (=