I feel awful about it but I just don't like black girls?

[Anonymous]

Is it racist to dislike only black GIRLS? I mean, I've had plenty of black male friends, I have nothing against them, I have been attracted to them and everything..

Beyonce, Hallie Berry, I love their movies and I think they are beautiful...

Ex: I am in a room there is a black girl, an Asian, a Hispanic, and a white girl... I would talk to any of the latter, weight, pretty or not makes no difference... before I would the black girl... I don't know why. I don't hate them... I just guess they're not my friend preference? I just don't like them either?

Don't get me wrong, I hate the 'N' word and have NEVER used it and never plan to.. :) I am not cruel about my preference.. I'll still be nice to a black girl if they are nice to me..

but I just prefer making friends with white, asian, Mexican, or half-black girls.. I've had ONE black female friend that was awesome.. but we kind of cut off contact when she got pregnant at like 16 (I am against teen pregnancy white/black/asian/etc I find any teen girl who gets pregnant to be irresponsible.)

Anyhow I feel extremely guilty about it, but I just don't feel the same. I don't get the urge to introduce myself to a black girl..

It possibly could be because all the ones I met in my college prep program (Not many live in my area..so I only got to interact with them a lot in my college prep)

Well they ignored all of us, even when I did try to talk to them.. this is where I made my friend Amber (name change of course..) Amber was the only nice one.. and all of them gave her a strange look for hanging out with me.. I genuinely was just trying to be Amber's friend. She seemed nice enough...and I was nice to them as well.. they just wouldn't have it and I felt so insulted.. It wasn't like I was going in there with a KKK uniform and saying and this and and that.. I was just being genuinely polite and they ignored every word I said.. ever since I just don't feel like I want to go out of my way to be friends with them.

I'm NOT saying they are bad people... I'm not saying they're ugly or lesser than me.. I just feel like they think they're better than me.. based on experience.

I'm sure NOT ALL black girls are like this... but my experience kind of put me off them... :/

I've never understood...

[Anonymous]

Well, it doesn't sound like you have hatred towards them and this has been your overwhelming experience with them, so it's not a big deal to me. I know a lot of others aren't going to be so lenient, but again, their experiences aren't yours. Though I would suggest to remain open while you're at arm's length.

I've also noticed that people are more defensive of certain groups than others. There have been comments about Indian guys on here and no one challenges anyone on that. There have been a few guys that have said things about white people (guys in particular) and no one got on their case too much (at least from what I've seen).

[Asker]

I by no means hate black girls.. just... a neutral feeling? I don't really feel the need to befriend them.. I just.. don't feel like sticking my neck out there. I don't want to be accused of being racist all the time.. (My sister is half black and I'd do anything for her... so it really makes me mad when anyone, male or female uses race as a scapegoat.. and some (again everyone, SOME NOT ALL) use "It's cause I'm black" as an escape for any issues they face in life.. rejection, conflict, etc

[kheserthorpe]

It doesn't sound like prejudice but it does sound like stereotyping.

I don't see any judgement.

But some past experiences have caused you to form a view of black girls and your instinct is to then assume that stereotype for other black girls.

That's fairly normal human instinct, but worth fighting. Try to be open to any new black girl you meet being another 'Amber'.

[Asker]

Oh I plan to, I just.. sigh.. wish I wasn't naturally prone to avoid them, you know? I don't do it on purpose.. I just don't want to be looked at like that ever again. I felt like I was trapped in an blizzard the way they stared ice daggers into me for trying to be friends with Amber.

[crraawww]

i would call that racial prejudice yes.

you're making assumptions based on race. the fact you feel guilty about it doesn't change it,

assuming you are white, if you went to a school where all the kids were the same race as you and all of them were stuck up and horrible to you, you'd just think "those people suck" you wouldn't think "man, I hate white people"

I hate the way people these days accept racial prejudice in themselves as just a "preference" or somehow justified

it is not OK to accept this in yourself, you need to find a way to change.

[Asker]

Everyone at my school WAS white except one half black girl. She would always yell "It's cause I'm black.." for anything that happened, teachers punishing her, her being assigned certain assignments in class, Someone not liking her. My sister is half black and I have nothing against her, but I hated this girl because she used her race as a pity party, the girls I met at Coll. Prep hated me instantly before I even said hello, Amber was the only one nice to me, so I did get past it and like her.

[SuckingurLollipop]

Skin color doesn't make the person. Those girls were rude and you know birds of a feather flock together, so of course they are going to act the same. College life is so small and it is completely ridiculous to base an entire people, because of one group of girls.

[Asker]

Yeah I know, but it's really hard to get an accurate view where I live.. There really aren't many to take example from.. most of the people in my area are white or Hispanic. There are a few asians, but even less black people.. I've met a few nice black girls, but when I see one for the first time I can't help my instincts to avoid attempting conversation.. unless I am giving a harmless compliment like their hair pr outfit and going on my way..

[SuckingurLollipop]

This is just called being small minded... I'm not sure which you would rather claim, but I recommend getting out more ^^

[Asker]

I've traveled to Britain, Wales, Ireland, Scotland, New York, North Carolina, West Virginia, Ohio, Tennessee, New Jersey, etc.. I have met a few nice black girls, but overall I cannot change my opinion.. I don't think hatefully toward them, just different.

[MaskofInsanity]

I don't think you're racist, but definitely racially prejudiced against black women. I find it very strange, but I'm not sure how you could change how you feel if you're not willing to give them a chance.

[ManaX]

You feel like they think they are better than you? Sounds like insecurity. Deal with it. You should feel awful.

[Asker]

The ones I have met? Yes. Black girls as a whole? No. It's just an underlying thought I'd prefer to ignore if I knew how. I do, thank you. Hope it makes you feel better about yourself for NOT helping.

[ManaX]

And how exactly am I supposed to help you? Cognitive behavioral therapy? Your thoughts are narrow minded and prejudice, it's your mindset that's the problem and only YOU can change that (not a bunch of people on the internet).

This question didn't make me feel any worse tbh, so I don't need to be told to 'feel better'. Appreciate the hope though.

[Asker]

Well an opinion without an attack would be nice. I'm trying to understand my way of thinking and fix it, I've stated many times I'm not FOND of it and you're not making my opinion any easier. Everyone else has been at least semi-nice to me as a person even if they don't agree with my views. I'm not out committing hate crimes. I'm actually trying to better my view. Yet here you are treating me like I'm part of the KKK

[ManaX]

If you were part of the KKK I wouldn't have bothered answering people like that aren't worth my time. But yeah, good luck.

[Machika]

@ManaX hello I'm a south Asian guy here ok. I have black male friends they are cool , energetic I like their accent. But black or mulatto girls I can't deal with them can't deal with their attitude , they are racist to me calling me bad bad things. I was not racist to them and they will say me racist things like call centre worker , hairy , bob n vagene etc etc. When all I did was to have some fun time with them. I was beaten by them , kicked in balls etc etc.
* It's not I dislike black or mulatto girls but the black girls who I find attractive who are average weight and I don't care about their colour of their skin. I don't like fat or what you ebony kinda girls they are turn off. For example : Rihanna , Ciara , Naomi Campbell , Tyra banks , leigh Anne Pinnock. are very attractive to me.
On the other hand ebony like Serena Williams , nikki minaj , Ahana finesse etc etc are turn off. Yeah and I got beaten several times by mulattos n black females in Guyana n trinidad with prisonstrap , baton , kick stomp etc etc that's why I think that you all do have an attitude problem

[Ashley34]

It's okay if you don't like black girls, black girls don't like you either

[Anonymous]

Honestly you sound intimIdated by black girls and possibly jealous

do you feel like black girls embody the mean girl stereotype and are cliquish and you feel almost rejected by them? I notice when girls dislike girls they don't know its almost always for this reason

[Asker]

I'm in no way jealous or bitter, I have no ill feelings towards them, nothing really mean to say, just other than I wouldn't normally try as hard to make them my friend as I would black guys, or any other type of girl.. and it kind of bugs me personally. I hate being selective.

[Opinion Owner]

As a black girl, I think the turn off you received from the girls you met is based on the fact that you "try" to be friends with people. A lot of girls I know mistrust or at least distance themselves for girls who they feel go out of their way trying to befriend people, it comes across fake and phony. Most girls I know prefer friendships that just naturally form. That's just how you feel, not really a big deal in the grand scheme of things.

[Asker]

Well I have social anxiety.. (Yes it was diagnosed by a psychologist) if I don't TRY to make friends.. it just doesn't happen. If I don't TRY to maintain them... I don't keep them.. I only got 2-3 friends because I unwittingly let my friends slip away and didn't hang out with them in months.. so I can't really help the "Natural instead of trying" approach. I'd be friendless. :(

[Anonymous]

There's nothing wrong with you.

It's just your preference.

[Anonymous]

You are stupid, racist and ignorent! Nobody likes you!

[Anonymous]

That's not racism, that's just feeling threatened that a girl is actually hotter than you..and you tend to think black women are hotter than you

[Asker]

Uhm... no.. Honestly I find Asians and Hispanics more attractive than me. I am extremely intimidated.. and if I had to go lesbian or die.. they'd be my preference. I don't think black girls are exceptionally physically attractive in general. They're not ugly, just not prettier than Asians or Hispanic girls I'm obsessed with Shakira and the girl who plays Santana on glee.. She's SO beautiful I think Hallie berry is beautiful.. but overall I don't find black girls more or less attractive than me

[Opinion Owner]

You sound really defensive, I think you're lying..

Also, Halle Berry is from right here in Cleveland, Ohio..you better respect her!

[Asker]

I just called her beautiful. Are you reading all of this or just what you want to see? lol...

Anyway, Hallie Berry is way better looking than me, but in general..(meaning black girls as a whole) I don't find a lot of them more or less attractive than me. Sure, some are, some aren't.. just generally speaking here.

[Opinion Owner]

...and I think you know thatthey're better looking than you...at this point in the conversation, they probably are

[Asker]

And I think you know by now... "at this point in the conversation" there is no way in hell you're getting best answer.. You're as helpful as a lump on a log. :/

Trying to insult me just like the girl below when what I asked the question for was help, tips, ideas. That's what this site is for, not your pointless insulting harassments

[Opinion Owner]

I wasn't harassing you. I answered your idiotic question

[Anonymous]

Black girls don't think they're better they just tend to stick to their own race, I'm sure that's noticable.

[Anonymous]

So? Who gives a fuck. Who are you again? A nobody.