One question for the guys: when is the last time your father or another male in your life, actually asked you to go shopping with them for clothing or vice versa? I'll hold for the long excruciating silence and eye brow raising and head scratching that I'm sure is all but happening at this moment in response to that question. You probably barely read the title of this, before you formed an answer to this question already. Is it, because "men don't do that," or "that's a woman's thing," or "it's just vain," or "men shouldn't care about that stuff," or the offending, "but I'm not gay," or all of the above?
For a good majority of men, it seems that they are not really "allowed" to acknowledge that they want to know about fashion or their love of fashion/style. They can't seem to openly talk about it where groups of strictly men are involved. You're not going to find many groups of guys who are like, "the colors on that shirt go well with your skin tones." They 100% absolutely fear being labeled as gay or feminine or not being man enough for wanting to know more about or liking fashion. It is yet another box society has placed on men where any forms of creative expression have to somehow be stamped out, spoken about softly with only certain people, or just completely hidden away.
For women, the story is different. The first compliments we received in life tended to be about how beautiful or cute we were, and then it became how beautiful and cute we were with what we were wearing, and as adults how sexy and gorgeous, and so on. Our mothers, our female friends and family members, made shopping a social activity very open to us and more importantly they taught us about fashion from an early age. Aside from shopping and spending too much, society does not frown upon a woman who loves clothes or style. We know clothes make a positive impact on our lives. Society supports this idea.Those women who are well dressed, who can configure a cute outfit, who tend to wear a feminine or trendy style, attract friends and lovers.
The stereotype or the truth, depending on the man, is that a man walks into a store, tends to go straight for whatever item he needs, does a quick assessment of whether it fits in his mind often failing to bother to even try it on (that's what returns are for) and then out the store he goes fifteen minutes later. Suppose this man now actually cared about proper fit, and matching the colors or patterns of the suit, or with finding just the right hat or ordering different buttons, and it took him 3 hours to accomplish this feat and he came home and told his brothers, his father, or his male friends about his shopping trip. Odds are he will probably be rewarded for this story with laughing, name calling, or the questioning of his sexuality, so those men, straight or otherwise, who do enjoy fashion or dressing well, tend to keep it more to themselves.
Ask a man if he wants to look good, and I think most would admit that yes they do, because again, just like for women, a well dressed man attracts friends and lovers, but most were never taught about fashion and are not willing to put much effort into learning about fashion, or in developing a style for I would argue the same reasons a fair majority of women do not put a lot of effort into say learning how a carburetor works or body building; the rewards given by society for learning, applying, and displaying such things are minuscule. So we tend to avoid things that we know will lead to us being ostracized in anyway or that we find have little reward, and for a lot of men, that is openly admitting they want to know more about fashion or love fashion or dressing well.
Most Helpful Opinions