Why I Gave Up Talking to Women (Page 2)
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Most of the comments here are retarded. Hello people, he can talk to whoever he wants. I gave up on dating women but I haven't stopped talking to them. I'm just friends with them. I don't know if you have officially stopped talking to women or not but whatever decision you make, keep your head up.
First of all you are 17 years old and girls in this age tend to be in relationships just to have fun and nothing serious.
So girls between 16 - 19 will go for hot, attractive, handsome guys.
While girls between 20 - 26 will go the lover i. e bad guys and guys who don't care about their futures.
And girls between 27 and 30 will go for the provider i. e the guys who have a job with good salary who provide security and good living.
So you are in the first category where girls want more fun than anything serious. And by the way girls don't care about looks as much us men think they you, they care more about confidence and personality. So an average guy girls will always get attracted to him because of his confidence and his ability to show his personality. these are real studies not nonsense.
I don't think I should wait till I'm 27 to get a girlfriend.
I've been there.. But your experience with women is limited, and you have your whole life ahead of you. There will be ups and downs. You'll get your heart broken over and over again. That's life.
I'd say there is no need to over analyze women. I wouldn't call them over complicated. They are often indirect and expect you to get the hint so you have to read their body language and the way they talk to you.
Just don't give up on them now, or you'll have a life time of regrets. Learn to pick up the cues women drop, be respectful to them, work on improving yourself (be more approachable, friendly, be more interesting overall) and most of all be confident in yourself. They will go a long way.
I've been taking a break from women, and have put a damper on my natural flirtatiousness and sincerity because so many women are into games. I've seen women who have boyfriends but stay tight-lipped about not being single, and lead guys to the point of being asked to spend the night, or being asked out... then rejecting him, for the fun of it.
I have female friends who don't hold back around me because we're not interested in each other, and I'll see them doing that. And I've fallen victim by women like that.
I feel you're pain
The reality is, there are just as many girls who are d-bags as there are guys. Neither gender is better than the other, though so many people still believe the "sugar and spice" theory. But, there are good girls out there, so it's silly to give up.
For all the bitter girls posting snarky comments here, you're unwittingly proving his point.
totally in agreement.
I'm sorry you feel that way, but I suspect as you get older your attitude will change.
This is not intended as a slam, but people in your age bracket still have some maturing to do. I realize you don't think so right now, but things you consider very important today will be insignificant to you in later years. You'll find things that will make a genuine basis for a relationship.
it doesn't change because I'm still pissed off cause of the fact that all that women want to be is a bunch of narcissistic spoiled rotten brats that want to have the privilege of only having what they want and saying you ain't getting what you want cause you men don't deserve it cause the women want to claim that us men have put you women through this so called "FAKE OPPRESSION" for how us men treated you that's all you hear women saying anymore you don't think men ain't oppressed because we ain't got you women in our lives do you think it's fair that us men are cast aside because you women want to claim victimhood because you women have been through so fucking much us men don't talk about how much we're practically a slave to women cause we have to go out in the work force and get a hard working job and when we come home and then we have to hear you bitching and griping because you don't like it that you have to cook and clean around the house and that you're so called oppression
that you have to cook and clean around the house
the problem is women get to overly emotional that you let every little thing get to you
@CancerianMan81 women are not all the same, but we do show emotions more for the most part, but showing emotion is actually a sign of strength. Just wanted to point that out, plus the fact that the asker here has a broken heart, but one day the sting of his past won't hurt as bad, and hopefully he won't feel bitter any longer, and either will you.
@miamigirl1970 I'm going out on a limb here and say women should pay for what they have done to me they should
and I don't care if I stay single for the way I act because If I accept myself for the way that I AM and somebody has a problem with the way that I am then that other person has something wrong with themselves it's funny how someone always tells me that I'm bitter when the fact is I'm starting to accept my bitterness
@CancerianMan81 don't know where this is coming from but you have to sort through how you feel, if it makes you happy and you can live with it then that is up to you.
why should I have to feel guilty for the way that I am or have somebody make me feel guilty for the way that I am who has the right to do that to me all this tiptoeing around about who a person is... Is fucking ridiculous
it's time women start acting the way they are suppose to act towards men
where this is coming from is when I myself show effort in wanting to be with a woman I'm pissed off for the fact that women ain't showing no effort into wanting to be with me
but the problem that women have is that their all in victimhood for the past relationships they've had when the fact of the matter is when a new person that comes in you're life you have to let go of the past relationships that you've been in so you can do right with the new relationship that comes in you're life period and if a woman doesn't want to change that then I guess women are going to stay single
women ain't got no one to blame but themselves and it's time for women to realize that
@CancerianMan81 all I can say is I blame nobody for past relationships. When they have ended, I use them as lessons for new ones, I never harbor old feelings, and I just try to hold onto good memories.
@miamigirl1970 I know that but I'm just saying what I'm going through in the present moment
all I'm trying to do is figure shit out I haven't had an easy past I'm going through counseling right now
@CancerianMan81 it is good if you are getting help that is the first step and trust me I am not judging I have been exactly there
@miamigirl1970 yeah and I understand trust me I do drugs and alcohol heartbreak after heartbreak after heartbreak the one thing that got me the most was losing my dad
I still haven't recovered from that
usually pain of loss of a loved one is hard to get over the grieving stage isn't easy it's not not when you've been around them most of you're life
@CancerianMan81 - The loss of a loved on is NEVER easy, and I am sorry for your loss. First you have to sort out your anger. Second, follow your recovery program, and no that it is not easy. I think all addicts practicing recovery are SOLDIERS!!! I give you props if you are in recovery! Third, forgive yourself first. We are all a product of our choices, including me! If you want a different path in this life, you can make one, but YOU have to choose it! I think your Dad would want you to grieve and move on. I hope you find your peace, it takes time. I lost one parent when I was 16 and the other only 4 short years ago. It is hard, but simply put, keep talking to people who can help you through your issues.
@miamigirl1970 well at the moment I do have a great support system and thanks for talking with me It does help a lot and I'm sorry you lost you're parents too
@CancerianMan81 anytime. I enjoy helping others and lending an ear. Message me on here if you would like. Take care of yourself!
@miamigirl1970 okay I'll do that and I'll try I'm not saying it's going to be easy well baby steps
@CancerianMan81 One day at a time!
@CancerianMan81 Goodness! With that attitude it's no surprise that women wouldn't come into the same ZIP code as you.
For what it's worth I work outside the home in a profession I enjoy & find rewarding, as does my husband. He & I share in the various domestic chores at home (He is an ass-kicking cook!). I never have nor do I now consider myself opressed.
I hope you enjoy being single because I suspect you will remain single for the foreseeable future. Good luck & be well!
who are you to criticize what's going to happen in my life
like you're relationships/relationship is so much better than mine that someone like you has to come along and discredit what I've been through and what I'm going to go through because you're on a power trip to make you think that you're better than anybody well you can take you're bullshit and run somewhere else with it cause you're words ain't valid to me cause all they are is empty words
@CancerianMan81 You solicited opinions, I gave you mine. Unfortunate if it's not what you were hoping to hear.
I'm sorry to hear about your father. I've lost loved ones too & I know grieving is a difficult thing to go through.
@CancerianMan81 miamigirl1970 is right, anger is not helpful & ultimately can be very damaging. Some things are too big for a person to soldier through by him/herself, & there is no shame in getting help to cope with it.
it is when someone talks about me and I've made a point to only care for myself and if a person see's what I'm saying or doing and they got something against me then they can just pack up their shit and just leave women has done this to their self and you know what my "Anger" serves as a purpose cause it shows how strong I've become and helps me to filter out bullshit from other people
@CancerianMan81 At the end of the day it is your life & you may live as you choose (within the bounds of law & civilization, of course).
If perpetual anger is an effective way of dealing with your issues then fume away. It does have the collateral effect of alienating you from the rest of humanity, & you should understand that may have professional as well as personal ramifications.
Good luck & be well!
Another ridiculous mytake where it's not the owners fault they lack social skills, it's the girls fault. And oh how much better they are not talking to girls. Keeping enjoying your pity party and leave the girls for the rest of us who know how to talk to them
Hey retard, girls only talk to you if you are attractive. It doesn't matter how good your social skills are. I've seen plenty of guys who aren't good at talking to girls, but are attractive and have gotten plenty of girls. I don't waste my time using my social skills on girls because they will always have the same disgusted response back.
Your biggest problem is your attitude. your life hasn't even begun yet and you've decided your own fate. I sure as hell ain't good looking and I've managed to get four girlfriends and make out/have sex with a dozen more. I'd tell you everything I did to make that happen, but you've made up your mind and it will become a self fulfilling prophecy. If you change your mind let me know. Otherwise, maybe try not calling people "retards". It will only further alienate you from society.
I only called you retard because you were making ridiculous hate against me that didn't make any sense. You know what cause me to have this attitude? Yep! Girls. Because girls just want a guy who is hot.
When there is a disagreement or argument, you have control over your own response, wouldn't you agree?
I'm not or a girl, I say how I feel. If you show hate I should have an equal opportunity to respond back.
Right, so you are arguing you have no control over your response. So if someone makes you angry enough, and you murder them, then it's their fault, and not yours. Am I reading that right?
Technically speaking, if someone is making you angry (such as bullying) and you murder them, then it's the victum's fault because he shouldn't of been mean in the first place. However, murdering someone isn't the way to express anger. It shows that a person has no control over their actions. Did I murder someone? No. This is a website where you can say whatever you want (obviously with a few exceptions) I can control what i can say to other people. People have commented mean things, calling me a pussy. So why not respond?
I'd like to say I can understand your plight, and you seem a bit irrationally angered over it, but it is that it is a lot, lot easier to be a ugly guy than an ugly girl. Speaking as a fairly conventionally attractive girl who spends a lot of time in academic circles and in athletic circles, I can 100% tell you I would sooner sleep with the hot guy, but a lot of the time in the long term I go for the guy who is smart and ambitious and good at talking. It doesn't sound like you're just 'ugly', it sounds like your not very suave or good at dealing with girls in a way that is socially fun and exciting. I know plenty of guys who aren't that cute, but are ridiculously smart or extremely funny or ridiculously good at talking to me who I've liked despite their appearance. Also, you come off as a massive dick. Maybe work on that?
Ok. Last time I checked girls loved guys who are massive dicks, because they are assertive. That "long term" is another word for "friendzone". The hot guy gets the chick, that's what its always been. i don't blame you though because Hollywood poisoned the minds of young girls.
I feel bad about whoever poisoned you to think the way you're thinking- you're being a 'massive dick' right now and it's not assertive or hot. It's rude and contentious and exactly why girls hate angry nerds who feel wronged by the world because they were shot down by a girl 10 times out of their league.
You say you're ugly and girls hate you; what actual experience do you have with girls? I myself have been asked out by dudes who I didn't know at all and rejected them and they thought I was a massive bitch as a warped defense mechanism/ cognitive dissonance to make themselves feel better about it. Are you mad because you wanted the hot chick, not the regular chick, and were (expectedly) shut down?
Life isn't a fucking Adam Sandler movie. A ugly guy with no redeemable personality traits who is bitter about everything isn't going to get fucking Megan Fox.
I Have a question for you. Don't you like when wax and shave their whole body?
your right the tv and Hollywood have done a great job of it and 98 percent do not realize what has happened to their little mind. Term Brainwashing.
Well, there's another factor you should consider. Age. Most girls like guys slightly older than themselves, at least until they themselves are quite old.
So girls your age would rather date guys who are closer to 19/20. Girls who are 20-25 have their pick of guys from their own age -and- older. There's a huge supply and demand imbalance for young women. By late 20's it flips around, and things are -slightly- in men's favor after that.
At 17? It's pretty bad. In some ways its worse when you're 21-22, because that's when girls your age have the MOST options. But it's pretty bad at your age because girls your age can and do date older. Meanwhile, as a 17 year old, probably 15 year old girls are interested in you (or more likely to be) but that's discouraged for a variety of reasons.
Anyway... that will change.
American women are not suitable for relationships as the teachers and politicians and gynocentric laws have poisoned their minds in the ways you mention plus many more you are not old enough to understand yet. Just fuck the ones you can now and keep them at arms distance.
When you get old enough you can travel, perhaps through your job and meet a nice girl from Asia, mexico or south america who will cherish and appreciate all that you can do for her as a loving partner. I have been to all these places and can tell you the problem is not you.
In fact, I have the adonis body you speak of and can get many American women, but the reality is even worse once you see all of their true colors
Hey, I see guys your age get really down on themselves about girls and all I have to say is a 17 year old girl even a 20 year old girl is not even mature yet. When you get older you will find girls growing in there mentality just as you also will.
I have seen both girls and boys just looking on the outside but I also have seen people that were not even attracted to one another fall in love and get married over getting to know each other.
So I guess that some obvious "crushing behaviour" indicates better to stay off if she approaches me?
Ultimately, for girls, it will always come down to the guys looks, nothing else really matters in comparison.
For them picking a guy is no different from going into a store a picking the best looking item of clothing. They don't couldn't care if one bit of clothing was made by fair trade or one was made by Indian slaves, they just go for the better looking one.
That's not true. Most women don't care much about looks, they care more about confidence and how the man makes them feel. That's why you often see hot women with ugly men.
@Love_Is_Eternal actually that doesn't happen as often as you think. Society today mainly creates hot couples whether that's in the entertainment industry or in college.
Ask most women what they prefer: a man who is super hot, but is dull and boring, lacks confidence, and has no excitment. Or a man who isn't that attractive, but is very confident, very exciting, and can make women laugh. I promise you, most women would prefer the second man.
@Love_Is_Eternal maybe older women sure, but at myn and the OP's age definitely not.
Older women want someone to have a life with, raise their children with, etc etc, so character is a lot more important. But. In teens and onto twenties, they're just looking for the hottest dude to fuck.
Maybe some teens, but not in general. I've seen many young women and teens with very unattractive men. When I was at school most of the pretty girls did not go for the best looking boys. They went for the big bullies, the ones who took drugs and had a reputation for fighting. Most of these boys were ugly chavs, but they still had most of the hot girls after them.
@Love_Is_Eternal girls would much rather go for the attractive person. It is what the entertainment business has done. They have poisoned the minds of young girls and women alike.
Well based on what I've seen over many years, women go for confidence more than looks.
@Love_Is_Eternal I've never seen a young unnatractive guy in a relationship. Never.
That's strange. I've been seeing it all the time for the last 20 years.
The thing that made me think otherwise was when i noticed you put school... you're still at school there is completely no need to give up yet when i was at school i'd barely even kissed a guy just keep trying to be positive as you do have plenty of time the girls you describe sound shallow and not all are like this.
Well, if that makes you happy then what can I say? I agree with some points made here to an extent. However, is wanting someone who is attractive, stable, and understanding that bad? I'm pretty sure any human, male or female, are looking for those attributes when looking for a partner. I hope your decision is improving your life, not degrading it. Best wishes. :)
u don't get girls cuz u think like that. But u'll learn that as time goes by.
Also u can hit the gym and make some effort "always stay skinny" is a bad excuse for laziness. The girls that u crave are also making some effort to look the way they look.
I do work out and I have been for over a year but I'm still skinny, that's not laziness that's just genetics.
Thats stupid and proves that you have 0 idea. Even if you are working out for years you're doing it wrong. I have a few friends who are also ectomorph's and when they started making research on how to gain weight as exomorph, they actually did. Its not about eating a lot, its about what you eat. If you were german I could give you an awesome eating and training program on what to eat and how to train. Also you're 17. Don't be too inpatient with your body. A year is nothing.
Well you said hit the gym and I said that I do
Yeah keep doing it, make your research and stop getting frustrated so easily. This is a very girly thing to do.
Ok but you gotta understand that I am frustrated because it's been a year with little results. You'd be the same way.
Well, I also had little results when I was your age. But they were still results.
So when we think logically for a second, even if its very slow, something happens.
Its like having a bathtub full of water, and your task is it to empty the bathtub by using a teacup.
It will for sure take some time, but you'll get there if you keep doing it. Stay consistent.
lmao... maybe its the type of girls you go after... have you ever thought of that?
don't be so easy to give up on girls.. you also said you can't really read girls well. maybe one likes you and you don't know it.
I could say same about guys. guys can be just a superficial and shallow.
I never talked to guys because I thought I wasn't in their circle, that they couldn't like me because I wasn't pretty enough... all self esteem issues. When I finished college, I threw that out the window and I just dated every single guy that showed me interest. That... is maybe how you might get a girlfriend
lol uhhhhh no. Eventually girls get tired of being abused by those kinds of guys and go for something different, but that's after they learn that looks aren't everything. My first love was a stocky hockey player who made $14.00 an hour and we couldn't afford shit. I fell in love with HIM and who he was. Whoever you are... don't give up! You could be an awesome guy and an awesome girl is waiting for you who will treat you right and you will treat her right!
For real. But we are all much older than the Asker. Just look at what girls his age are spewing here. They even come with pictures for some of em. THE IDGAF mentality got intense for the younger generations. It was still a thing in my HS days and college days. But today? Holy shit
@JesseBrooks the reason for lack of caring and compassion of others is because social media has made them all full of themselves lol. Want to talk about something pathetic? Caring about how many likes you get on your picture from people you'll never meet.
ROFL, yeah. I know I won't be around to see it, but I wonder what its gonna be like in a century? Or 2? That movie Idiocracy comes to mind.
@JesseBrooks lol I'm glad I won't be around either. You're so right
I don't agree with what you say. Girls have a selection process. But it does not work in exactly the same way you say. It is a complex process as all girls are different and their expectations are different and their vulnerability level s different. If you are lucky , you will pass their test any time. I have had offers from girls even having a picture on GAG. How can it be?
The same reason why a lot of girls are into Channing Tatum. You must be really attractive to them.
So I have blocked private messaging system.
Hot, cool, charismatic people date other hot, cool, and charismatic people. That's no shocker and past high school, it stops feeling like such an injustice that you can't pick and choose the exact person you want out of a crowd to fall for you.
That doesn't mean the rest of us can't meet, fall in love, have a passionate sex life and feel positive about life.
Some of the happiest couples I know are two kinda "dorky" people who love being dorky together.
But I'm not a "dorky" person.
I mean that all kinds of different people meet their match and it all works out.
I won't meet mine because my matches are all three of the things I've listed.
If the people you like are lame, why do you like them? (Circle back to my answer).
Who's to say that they are lame? What if I'm considered "lame"? But I don't like other "lame" people?
I mean if you think they aren't great people, and sure they are not looking for something deep... why do you like them?
They are looking for something deep, just with good looking, muscular people. Which I am neither.
Ah, gotcha... just feeling down about yourself. Everyone goes through that. Just take some time away from it and do things you enjoy. Learning to be comfortable with yourself is a major factor in enjoying life.