"You can do so much better than me" ???

[oss91]

I have gotten comments similar to this one from the past few girls that I have dated. We will go out on a few dates, talk for a short while, and they'll just say something along the lines of, "you can do so much better than me" or "why are you settling for me" or "you're in a different league than me". That last one really caught me off guard. All of these statements have come from girls telling me how they really liked me from the first time we met. I am at a loss on this one.

[Rafael151]

If they like you enough to go out and then they start saying that, are they just commenting or really attempting to break it off? It could be that in an effort to make an impression, you're saying too many things that make them feel inadequate (and they want to to say how they are NOT in a different league). Or it's just an observation on their part that makes you feel like they wouldn't go out again. If you ask again do they say no? Or are you hesitating to ask? Tell them no way. You're surprised they would think that and how you don't know really think they would say yes. you just hoped they would.

[ambishis]

compliment them, make them feel like they are in your league, they obviously have some confidence issues, so help them, make sure they know your not making a compromise! you don't need any help on this one, make them feel good lol!

[DefLeppard101]

When a girl says "you can do better then me" it is because they are looking for a compliment or they are trying to find a nice way to brake up with you. It is mostly because they do feel that you can do better then them. Most of the time all you need to do is say something along the lines of "there is no one I would rather be with" or if you are uncomfortable with that then just look deep into their eyes and say something really sweet and romantic like "u are so sweet."

something along those lines and I hope that this has helped you out.

[R6LA1]

it's simple: low self-esteem. and unless you want to get stuck in the trap of being the one to constantly boost their ego, BE CAREFUL if you DO continue relationships with these types of women. they'll have you trapped b/4 too long, feeling guilty if you ever wanted out of the relationship.

*good luck!*

[Anonymous]

I agree with the others. They are either trying a lame way to let you down or fishing for a compliment from you. You should ask them what do you mean by that? Or say that your not a shallow type of guy. Because that does seem like a very shallow comment. Best to you!

[oss91]

I thought it was kind of a weird statement. She didn't say it in a way that she was trying to let me down but rather in a way that she questioned why I wasn't going for much better girls. She honestly thought I had settled for her. It's not like we are even remotely talking anymore (but we still are friends) I have just been curious by that statement for a while. I guess some people just do not see themselves as worthy of another's company.

[Opinion Owner]

Maybe your right. May she did not feel worthy of your company. People can be strange when it comes to relationships. But, by saying that statement...doesn't kinda make you stop and think..."maybe I should do better"...kinda like she starts you thinking..weird is true. I for one would never say that just in case you didn't notice I was lower rank..:o) Sounds like you can do better...LOL..You gotta laugh at life...it can be funny!

[Miss-Spicy]

It's their way of letting you down gently. It seems you keep picking the same type of girl who would use this cop out. It's weak and lame.

Good luck!

[Miss-Spicy]

I want to clarify. You aren't weak and lame. Those girls who use those lines are weak and lame. Any true person will tell you what's really going on and not try and pull a fast one.