My best guy friend is avoiding me after we had sex? Not sure what to do now..

[Anonymous]

My best guy friend and I have had an interesting relationship. We have had our up and downs and have had fights where we don't talk to each other for awhile. Me and him got really close then we had sex. After sex, he got really weird. He started avoiding me and ignoring me and saying he was depressed. When I asked him what was wrong he always told me "I can't tell you. I don't want to talk about it." So I gave him some space while he worked out some things. We took a break from sex too. Well, me and him had different interests and we went after other people. Well, the girl he was interested in rejected the date he asked her on, and the guy I liked turned out to be a total player. So we got close again. He's been there for me through a lot really sweet and everything. He asked if I wanted to have sex with him again. Before that, he was telling me how much he cared about me and needed me, and how sexy and beautiful I was. How he's afraid I won't be single for long, and that I deserve better than him. He even said "I love you." I didn't know what to say so I just said thanks and smiled. But I told him that I liked him a lot too and was happy with him. We had sex again, and it was amazing. After the sex, he's once again avoiding me. He won't talk to me much and whenever we text or talk on the phone or see each other it's just really really awkward. He tells me he's depressed and I ask him why. He just says "I can't tell you. I gotta go." And either leaves or stops texting or hangs up on me. Or making these excuses not to talk to me. Frankly, I'm getting extremely fed up with it and really don't know what's going on. I had a facebook status that said "If you want me.. let me know." But he's being an asshole of a friend right now. Do I just ditch him? I care about him a lot , but he's really hurting me lately.. What's up with him?

[Lalaaj06]

Hey, based on what I READ, it seems like he likes you a great deal. However he knows you and knows what would make you happy. He may know that you care for him but not in a loving romantic relationship. It seems like every time you both are intimate he gets in his feelings. So after sex he disappears mentally emotionally etc because it's to hard knowing that you may only want him as a best friend and every now and then you have se with. Men are horrible with expressing themselves especially if they know they will get shot down. When he said he loved you and you didn't say it back spoke volumes to him. Put yourself in his shoes a bit with that one. After awhile you will both keeping coming back together as friends and bed buddies but sooner or later you will have neither because his feelings are getting deep. I know many said he was just using but I didn't get that based on your story. I am currently in that situation and after he disappears I realize more and more how I use HIM for comfort me after another guy strikes out. It is nice having someone there that thinks you are beyond beautiful and they know EVERYTHING about you. Men have feelings (like a girl) too. Best of luck...

[MusicalCupcakes]

I think it's obvious he's avoiding you after sex cause he got what he wanted. Next time he asks to have sex kick him in the groin. (Or just say no) haha. Seriously it'll be a test. If he goes a very long time still being your friend after you deny him sex and doesn't ignore you at all he is a friend and you should give him a chance. If he gets angry or ignores you or pressures you drop him like a rock because he's just using you and you're better than that. Just whatever you do DON'T have sex with him again.

[Anonymous]

Stop having sex with him. Sex without a relationship is a dead-end. I would totally ditch him. He's not treating you like a guy would if he really loves you. He isn't even treating you with the common decency of a friend. Sounds like he enjoys having sex then feels badly after because he doesn't want a relationship with you and he knows he's a douche, so he avoids you until he can forgive himself and hit you up for sex again.

[nicegirl30]

He got confused, maybe he felt bad of having sex with you, give him time, he will look for you, when he feel better of his confusion, at least he talked to you and said to you he feel depressed...Don't have more sex with him...