Why do some guys mistake a girl who is polite and has a friendly personality for flirting? (Page 2)
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Because guys in general are fucking terrible at reading signals. We miss what girls would think are obvious signs, and we sometimes think something is a hint when it really isn't.
Speak for yourself! XD
This question made me laugh pretty hard. Let me explain something to you that might help you understand.
Women complain constantly about the fact that men don't take hints or understand physical cues. There is a lot of truth in that. Men are straight forward. When we are interested in a girl we have to approach her and ask her out. There is generally no mystery involved when a guy approaches a girl.
Now, women are the other hand do not generally approach men. They are subtle in how they show their interest. They use hints and physical cues that men need to somehow pick up on and interpret. There is nothing straight forward about how women show their interest in men.
Now, with that in mind, HOW THE FUCK would you expect men to know with any accuracy whatsoever whether a women is flirting or just being friendly?
Probably because its so uncommon. it is very hard to differentiate a friendly personality, from interest.
I'm sorry, it's not a dig against women. But it does seem like there is a generally accepted level of hostility, from women. Towards a man she is not interested in.
I am the worse guy for this. If a girl smiles at me the wrong way i assume she is flirting with me. When someone is nice to me i mistake it for flirting all the time. I often act on the "flirting" and i am often waaaaay off. Why do i make this mistake? I think it has something to do with fear of rejection and the fact that i was bullied up to high school. I would love to stop and i would love to know why i get those feels when a girl smiles at me.
Forget being nice or friendly, if a girl is ACTUALLY flirting still it does not mean she wants something, it can be just fun to flirt with no intention, sadly it rarely can be done with a new person, usually possible when girl and guy are already friends
It can be for multiple reasons, he could be desperate and could easily confuse an act of kindness as flirting, he can be a player and see it as teasing, or he can be entitled to women and think that she's interested in him even she shown a signs that she isn't into him, but he'll only remember the one time that you were nice to him.
Because we want nice girls. We are attracted to nice girls. And so many girls are bitches so when we meet one who is actually nice to us we get a bit of a shock because we are expected her not to be as nice as she is. She take this niceness as a sigh that she must have the care and respect for us that indicates romantic interest. But too often we are mistaken.
Finding a truly nice girl is rare, finding one that actually likes you as more than a friend is even more rare.
But care and respect does not indicate romantic interest. You are making finding a nice girl from hard to impossible because even if she could be interested in you she does not want to give that impression straight away. And many nice girls are not bitches, they just try to avoid this situation by being rude since its the only way guy will not think she wants him
@Porcelaine that's the entire point of my response. But we instinctually get caught up and assume this niceness means something because we rarely experience. And I never claimed nice girls were bitches. That's why they are njce girls, because they aren't.
Its usually, when desperate guys see a nice girl, they like to believe that the girl in interested in them, in order to flatter their fragile egos. I'm a friendly and confident person myself, so i get a few weird guys clinging onto me, usually on a night out, when im trying to chat to friends, so it can get annoying!
Because that is also how girls flirt. And, wishful thinking.
But it works the other way too. I've had store clerks be very friendly, and then when I am friendly back and joke with them. suddenly they quit being friendly like they think I'm hitting on them, when that isn't my intent at all, generally because they're 17 or something.
Because being flirty and friendly are sometimes separated by just a thin line, depending on the person's personality.
I'm very playful and teasing when I'm friendly, and that has lead a lot of girls to believe I was flirting, when all I was doing was being nice and friendly.
Guys who do this are usually guys who have had no experience with women. I don't mean this in relationships, I mean this in general. They most likely never really just had a female friend or sat down with a female and just talk. Or they have been rejected by women.
Young men are usually overcome with hormones and starved for attention from the opposite sex. They become desperate and lash out in some cases like the "niceguys" scenario. They'll blindly follow any girl who bats her eyelashes and smiles at them unfortunately.
Everyone has this to some degree, knowing people like you makes you feel good. So when a girl looks at you, you uncountiously hope she likes you and you interpret it that way. I think its biological to gain more confidence into getting approached or when approaching someone.
Because the signs of flirting are often the same as being friendly and polite.
It's not just that men can mistake a women's friendliness for flirting, they also sometimes mistake flirting for friendliness.
Yes i think guys need to get their self together and know what's flirting or not flirting.
True. That way learning to read body language is non verbal cues are important.
Yes i agree
It's a projection behavior.. That kind of guys/girls usually are the same people that have this sort of kissing-ass mentality. They use politeness & friendliness only when they want something, so that's how they interpret politeness & kindness from others (as a sign of begging).
Yeaa they have a big ego. That’s why I am super cautious because my friendliness may be misinterpreted
I know right? But sometimes you can be really subtle it can still be misinterpreted wrong
My advice, continue being friendly, but if you see some mess let it clear, anybody could judge you for it.
About big ego, I don't think it has anything with that.
@lernulo
I agree
Be friendly and clear up misunderstanding
😊😊
Because guys are hardwired to reproduce so they unconsciously think every girl wants a baby inside her
I had a big jealous woman chase after me because her man thought I was flirting with him. I wasn't even attracted to the guy.
No its just most guys are terrible at reading signals
Indeed
Lol!!!
Are you good at reading then?
Most times I am but I misread sometimes as well
We all misinterpret what the opposite gender do because our emotions and brains are hardwired differently. You know just like girls mistakes a guy for being a "nice guy" AKA creep for being a nice guy.
And who's that girls in the pic? She's my type hehe.