A guy has someone in mind that he really likes, but still would like to hangout with me and flirty sometime and saying I always enjoyed time with me?

[My0795]

[bobalife]

LOL I have a good guy friend like that in the past too. It was so confusing…. But it also shows he’s pretty flirty and can’t make up his mind about you if he’s also telling you about another girl he claims to really like. I wouldn’t have my hopes up if I were you unless he is showing you that you mean more than the other girl. He may not intend it but it’s kinda stringing you along… I honestly used to have a thing with that friend too, but I just decided to move on and didn’t bother with it cuz I just knew better and nobody wanna be someone’s second choice/back up/side chick.

[My0795]

thank you! do you like boba?

[My0795]

Do you think he claimed that he likes that girl maybe stringing me along, right? The thing is he mentioned: he doesn’t want himself and that girl be a long-distance relationship, maybe the will move together. But he emphasised on “Maybe”. So I’m confused about he really would like me to know about or he just wanna a “friend” can be hangout with.

[bobalife]

Haha I LOVE boba! 😋

So he does consider of being in a relationship with this girl? If you want him, I’d say get out of the friend vibes and not just be there to support him about this girl… like kinda keep your distance in a way… but if you don’t want anything and just be friend, keep doing what you’re doing. I think he is low key stringing you along.. are you guys considered close friends or…? Maybe you can playfully tell him you also like someone but it doesn’t feel like he likes you back, so maybe you should consider another guy to see what’s his reaction?

[My0795]

I’m not sure the close friend we are. But he mentioned something, while someone asked him “Hey, this girl you brought to the lounge, are you dating with her” He said “No, I wouldn’t bring a girl to dating here, if something happens, I cannot be here anymore” because he always go the lounge as a part of his daily rounding. In the meantime, he was claimed that we are not that type of hangout. So now, I’m kinda thinking he really stringing me along some way..

[bobalife]

Oh shet. Yes kinda keep your distance cuz you don’t wanna be available all the time in a platonic way when you want more, show him he gotta show he’s sincere and put effort if he wants more, and still be a chill person. And maybe think about moving on in case he never turns around cuz it’s 50/50

[My0795]

Got it, although it’s been tough for me. But starting from yesterday, he started to refuse me about invitation to salsa dance which he said yes before in a way of he’s feeling comfortable and so on. And I felt like he tried to keep a distance now, because I asked are you okay and do you need milk tea, he was saying i’m fine thank you….. The more weird thing was he just invited me to his whiskey and movie night one day ago before the thing happened, what’s wrong with me? Did I over react on him as a care from friend?

[bobalife]

Nope, you’re just be a good friend who cares or someone who likes him. But don’t always do whatever he wants. You gotta keep your distance too esp if he pulls back. He probably knows you’re always available. You gotta not always be down for whatever he’s down for and do you or keep your options open and make it known just as he’s making it known. I mean sometime people also just get busy or have stuff going on. I honestly don’t reply to guys much cuz I get super busy easily until I see more sincerity or investment then I’ll give more attention and time. But that’s me.

[My0795]

Ok, thank you! A bunch of great suggestions! For that girl, I also don’t know if he really wants be in a relationship, cuz they re not in a same city. When I asked him will you guys move together cuz you like her very much and doesn’t wanna a long distance relationship. He said maybe

[My0795]

Did you hang out with that friend finally? Or you just made it over and be friend instead of closed friend?

[bobalife]

If he ever brings her up, it will be a good question to ask him if he was planning to make her his official girlfriend or he sees himself wanting to be with her? So you kind of get a good grasp of how much does this girl even means to him. But I mean, if you guys do hang out, I wouldn't even bother to ask him about her. I would purely focus on the connection you have with him to show him you are better and you are there with him! (if you think he's worthy of pursuing) :) I would also suggest don't always say yes to hang outs with him. Like if he wanna make more effort to see you, talk to you, and see you - then sure. Like keep a good balance like you still have your life to have fun and do your thang while you can see him other times too. Make it known there's another guy to see his reaction LOL. Maybe even a small thing like "oh yeah there was this really cute guy today who hit on me" and look at his expression on how he took it. LOL. I don't know just play it low key on that one.

[bobalife]

haha it was quite the opppossiteeee XD We met through an event, afterwards he was already trying to get to know me romantically. But after a couple months, it didn't go anywhere. He still tried to keep in touch with me and wanna keep me as a close friend. I wasn't like fond at first, but I'm just like why not cuz we were really cool. So we were supposed to be "just close friends" and it got a little confusing at times cuz he was still flirty left to right at times. We also lived two hours a part. But whenever he come hang with me, its just weird, it would be fun yet confusing LOL. I remember he told me his other female close friends are like a sister to him, but he say he can not see me that way. I laughed it off too cuz I told him I can't see him as a brother either while my other close male friends are usually like one for me. In my head its because obviously we used to talk and I still think he's good looking cuz he is. There goes that awk laugh and tension between us because he probably think the same. He would sometime throw random compliments I am cute/pretty, have nice eyes, nice butt too. But I never think into it cuz we were supposed to be "just friends" and sometimes I just think my guy friends who does that are just being nice LOL. Everytime he flirt, I would just ignore cuz I think of our past, our current friendship, and the kind of guy I want no longer fit his picture. I was like in my early 20s, so I was diggin guys who likes art, dancing, super tall, ambitious = it is all of him. But as you get older, you know more and more what you want. Plus I don't wanna be no ones back up and I surely dont wanna be his. One of my ways of doing it was not tryna talk to him that much even tho he still hit me up basically on the daily LOL.

[bobalife]

Then, I eventually match made him with a close friend of mine. They eventually got together and I genuinely was happy for them. I just didn't see him nothing more than a friend after our initial romantic story. But I guess my female close friend low key feels intimated by me in general and maybe our back story cuz it eventually got awk whenever me and him seem to have our own jokes and she doesn't see happy about it if we all hang out together. It was low key weird when they first got together too cuz I started dating someone else, and both me and my female friend noticed he seemed really quiet and looked mad. So I don't know if you ever still liked me during those days. And now long story short, me and him stop being friends since he put his relationship above friendships in general. Like he dont really care about his friends at all. I just didn't know him anymore. And my female friend, we stopped being close cuz she just gets jealous about me and it continue to get more awk on other things. I used to be sad over it, but friendships just comes and goes. I learn to appreciate friends who really value you and wanna grow together.

[bobalife]

I guess because we were such close friends and I put my feelings behind me, I value it enough to put friendship boundaries and back away when I feel like its getting weird with his behaviors while still maintaining a good friendship. I do that with all my male platonic friends though to keep it "just friends" and for me to not think anything of it. Plus, similar to your story.. I brought him up cuz he was talking about other girls he was interested in whlie acting the way he does with me at times. So I'm just not all about that Lol. I don't like it nor find it attractive. It becomes more of a turn off for me personally. I just never flirt back nor reciprocated. Just gotta value your worth and what you are truly looking for, which that ain't what I was looking for.

[Miyasee_]

I wouldn’t do that, it’s my opinion. I would like to be number one that one and only who he likes and don’t even think about to flirt others.

[My0795]

I know what you mean. Just think to keep distance with him now cuz he’s into someone. Also after hangout serval times, I felt he would like to pull back a bit. So wouldn’t be too close to him

[iseekpinetrees]

Then he likes you too.

[My0795]

I don’t think so, he’s mentioned he had a girl he really like.

[Supernormal]

So the question exactly❔

[Blackcupcake]

Wasting your time