Is it possible to be so beautiful no man approaches you?

[Anonymous]

I find smiling at them helps

[Enaya]

For the longest time, I did not think so because the movies said men flock around the good-looking women. But in life, men stare at the good looking women, they don't approach. I spend most of my life as an academic nerd and did not learn to do natural makeup until very late in my life, so it came as a surprise to me that men were attracted to my looks. I was always into the idea of a mind-mate, still am.

But as I took more interest in fashion as a way of expressing myself, keeping fit, and applying not-over-the-top makeup, I got called things like "gorgeous" and "stunning," but never "beautiful." The first two are appearance driver compliments by people who don't know or approach you. Beautiful has more to do with the personality and looks together and men don't approach so they don't know that I can be pleasant as a person. Apparently they think I will be haughty or something. I had had men gape at me open-mouthed, very high powered men stutter, fidget, and get very nervous around me. A lot of men I meet are at work, being in a male profession, so they do not really make a move. In social life, I get approached by little to no people. If they do approach, it's only the f-boys because they don't have qualms about getting rejected so much. So now I believe, yes, after a certain level of attractiveness, it is very difficult to find men who will make any effort with you. I tried the reverse and approached myself and that spooked the men off even though they were showing all the nervous signs.

[SoftM]

Enaya, are you sleeping with someone along the way? Even your cousin/uncle (s) etc?
I ask since far to many females assume they can 'totally' do that without prospective dates minding, and, from a guy's perspective, we either go for chaste, or for easily managed (as in, no dramas separation, since no one appreciates dramas from a girl that wasn't chase/unmarried to begin with).

If you are not chaste but consider yourself high value, good guys will avoid you. We imagine and expect high value to mean you ate single, not daddy's little proncess, not your brother's gentle-cuddles toy etc.

If you want to be approached, you need to be single, chaste, and in a mindset of readyto marry, not to argue about your rights to sleep with others.

It is your body, and your choice. It is only of interest to a male _if_ you are _undeniably available_, and _chaste, single and interested_.

For unavailable, any good looking and devent guy (educated is assumed) can move to Amsterdam and have a no-dramas, guranteed hassle free, relationship in which he is not the only guy, with as many prostitutes as he likes.

They don't do that job for money but for sex. They are just honest about being with others.

[SoftM]

Chaste, a virgin baptised, never consummated marriage.
Not 'chased' as in 'chasing'. No one's remotelly interested in chasing. Not even in pursuing. Only in serious and guaranteed available, single, unobsessed even with her girlfriends or mom, let alone any males.

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[Morgan234]

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[Asker]

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[Prettysammie]

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[Finchie40]

More than likely yes , when a girl is beautiful most guys will feel she is out of his league that she will want nothing to do with him , so a guy won’t attempt , cuz he doesn’t want to be denied , The same thing happens with girls that are attracted to a man she finds is out of her league , So the easiest way to get someone’s attention and to show interest in someone is to try to make eye contact with them and smile if you are to nervous to approach them , The funny thing is , it’s best to go out with an opposite sex friend , usually an opposite sex friend can tell you if someone is interested in you or not , Cuz half the time we are clueless if someone is trying to get our attention and showing interest , Most of my friend’s wives will be like Oh she likes you, And I will be like Huh? What makes you think that? She will tell me look how she gets all giggly when she comes walking by you or look how she is playing with her hair etc. So I would make conversation with her and flirt with her and and I was shocked, they were right lol Guy’s can help Girl’s as well when it comes to a guy checking her out. But all in all most people are shy and don’t want to get denied , I learned to just go for it , if I find a girl beautiful to my eyes , I just go for it cuz I figure I really have nothing to lose , it’s best to try them not try at all , We don’t walk around with signs flashing over our heads saying what we are into or what our relationship status is , so it’s best to just go for it , I rather have an answer then not have an answer at all

[Genie23]

Some people can get intimidated or think you already have someone so they shouldn't approach or some people have had bad experience with some divas, so some people assume she might have a very bad attitude, it's best not to approach.

[SawerBrown]

Good point Genie and we'll put

[Genie23]

Thank you! @ SawerBrown

[Moose304]

There are 2 basic reasons females are not approached these days. I am 65 and have been observing interactions between males and females for decades. The first one is for whatever reason they put out bad vibes that men pick up on and avoid her. I was with my girlfriend a while back and we watched a female enter the bar area and she had "don't approach me" written all over her. Granted sometimes this is a misinterpretation I get that. This now leads to my last point. I have watched men asked to leave an establishment simply because they said hello and the female made a complaint. Back in my youth full days when a female rejected a guy that guy just walked away and was made fun of the rest of the night! These days in more and more situations the guy has to leave. I have sat in bars with friends and watched hotties sitting alone looking miserable because of it. Many times I would whisper to the barkeep to let her know it was OK to join us. Not meaning to morph this question. But, this same dynamic is taking place all over corporate America. Females are complaining that men refuse to mentor them. They are not invited to off-work get-togethers etc. Men simply won't take that chance in this me-too environment. Maybe in a few years, a better balance will be achieved. For now, men are protecting themselves! Honestly, I can't blame them.

[Tomisworthless]

Agreed I never approach and it’s worked well for this long

[Genie23]

@Moose304 I know what you mean. I've seen so many women annoyed/sad sitting by themselves after being dressed up and even some of my former housemates complained that guys don't take initiative anymore.

Then I've seen many guys wanting to approach but feel hesitated to. I remember some guys expressing that they're terrified of approaching women as they care about their career and don't want to get accused of harassing simply for approaching and wanting to talk/ask out. They're often confused because many times women do not want to get approached and some women never want to get approached. Men just don't understand whom to approach and when. So, I can see the miscommunication and misunderstanding going on. It's sad really.

[Pinay_ako]

Sometimes you don’t have to be sinfully beautiful for no one to approach you. Sometimes some people just give off that intimidating or arrogant vibe to not approach them. So that’s why nobody says hi 👋.

[Shiningtempest]

@pinay_akoI I don't approach new people in social setting because I know I won't get along with that people.

[Avicenna]

That is not possible, no way.

[Summeroflove]

It can happen. Lol. Just approach them silly

[MrOracle]

No. But it's definitely possible for a woman to appear too high maintenance, which means guys will see her as an expensive hassle, and that will simply make them uninterested in her for anything other than casual sex. If you look expensive and designer, frankly most men aren't interested, and the ones who are tend to be men looking for a trophy wife - a woman he keeps around just for her looks, but doesn't take especially seriously beyond enhancing his own image. This kind of man also makes no pretense of being monogamous - they are, by definition, shallow and self-centered.

I recently heard a woman say "men wife up women who are 'plain Janes'", but that's not quite right. Men tend to wife up women who are NATURAL in appearance. Women who are what I call "plastic Barbies" - lots of makeup, designer clothes, and often plenty of cosmetic procedures - tend not to be taken seriously as relationship partners.

It's also very possible for men not to approach a woman because she doesn't show any signs of interest in the man. As you've noted, smiling at a man tells him there is some interest from you, and that's what most men are looking for. Why would a man approach you with no signs of interest from you, when that means rejection is nearly a certainty? Most men won't approach a woman until she shows some kind of interest in him.

[DermalPunch]

Men tend to wife up women who are NATURAL in appearance.

They still try to get casual sex out of these women too. It seems that's all anyone wants these days.

[MrOracle]

Those are largely men who have no interest in having a relationship - a description that includes virtually all of the men that most women find the most attractive. Those top 10% men, as valued by women, aren't looking for relationships - the only thing they want from women is sex. Yet, most women are ONLY interested in these men, and they can't figure out why their relationships don't work out.

[DermalPunch]

Also not true about this 10% figure. Broke dudes doing the same things.

[MrOracle]

It's absolutely true, but, yes, low moral men also act that way. It's the guys in the middle - the ones most women ignore, those are the relationship men. The ones who are invisible to most women.

[DermalPunch]

Are the day men? Because they are pretty big a**holes too.

[Anonymous]

This is tough. Very beautiful women have some extreme privileges and unique challenges. Depending on their upbringing and their innate personality they might use it or abuse it.

I’ve seen women on GAG and in real life have this “my shit doesn’t stink” attitude when a man who is “beneath them” approaches them. It wasn’t about how he approached them but it was “oh he is so creepy and pathetic he thought he had a chance with me” condescending and conceited attitude.

Sure this girl is a selfish bitch and the guy and other people can recognize that. But when a guy approaches he is putting himself in a vulnerable position. He is sticking his neck out. Never be rude to a man who tries (if he is polite about it). If you get a “bad feeling” check yourself and ask if you are being fair. If the guy is really a threat or not. 95% of the time he isn’t.

Then there are other scenarios where I’ve been surprised that women who I thought were out of my league actually liked me. I got my foot in the door with a solid 10 in college. But the absolute worst thing happened. I screwed it up and she made a unilateral decision to friendzone me. But I wasn’t friendzoned in the beginning. The fact I had a chance and I screwed it up made it torture on my end. But I was young and I didn’t know what I was doing.

[Aniih]

"selfish bitch" sounds rude gentleman.. I think there's different type of personalities independently of how beautiful or handsome they can be. I have met both scenarios and you can find shitty people, traumatized or very kind, generous, smart beautiful ladies or handsome guys.
I disagree with this ideas.
Good luck lightsaber.

[Opinion Owner]

@Aniih I’m not “light saber”

You know over the years I’ve been in scenarios where I’ve had women I didn’t find attractive at all approach me and/or have crushes on me. It wasn’t comfortable but I was never rude to them. I did communicate directly I wasn’t interested but I did it gently. Yes I was worried about how they might react. Yes I felt a sense of guilt knowing they would be disappointed (at best) but I was never rude about it. It took her courage to be put in a position of vulnerability (where she might get rejected). Of course I don’t have to date her but I got to respect that position because I know exactly how the reverse position feels.

But maybe I’m talking to the wall here.

[Aniih]

To the wall? Nope I'm reading you, but what i mean is we cannot generalized. As I female is terrible all the shit we have handle, tons of guys molesting (even if you're not pretty or if you're a grandma).
That turns you into a grumpy monster sometimes, I imagine it's just mechanism, some of them are not terrible.
Just my opinion Mr. Anonymous. But I might just be talking to a graveyard here! :3 :)

[Opinion Owner]

@Aniih I did acknowledge that women especially attractive women deal with “unique challenges”. I also acknowledge that women can’t be overly nice to a man they are not interested in (despite him being polite) because he might get the wrong idea.

However you need to understand the position men are in. Despite it being a “modern” society most women still expect men to approach them. Don’t try to debate me otherwise on that because we both know it’s true. Women still expect men to stick their necks out and be assertive. That’s a sign of “confidence” right?

Most guys don’t enjoy doing that. No we do it because we have to. We are often a lot more nervous than you realize. Even attractive guys still expected have to put forth initiative when comes to approaching their attractive counterparts.

So when a guy approaches a woman he usually has no idea if:

- She’s taken or not
- She’s in a good mood or not
- Last but not least she finds him attractive or not.

Men are not nor will ever be mind readers. And given we are forced to take risks if we want something to happen then we will often approach women who aren’t interested.

Women could do a better job of understanding the man’s position on this and respecting it. Respecting does mean you have to date the guy or even be “nice” to him. No it means you understand he’s sticking his neck out.

Reject him the same you want to be rejected. Just be direct yet polite about it.

[Opinion Owner]

*respecting doesn’t mean

[Aniih]

Uhm... You write In a very particular way, sounds familiar. Well... Ahh i think is more complex than that, but who am I to argue about this. Sounds like men suffer a lot in silence.
Well good luck i never had issues approaching to someone but I imagine the misunderstandings.
:))

[Opinion Owner]

@Aniih well you never had to worry about coming off as “threatening” to someone when you approached them.

But the position most men are in here is something most women will never fully comprehend simply because they don’t have to.

Anyway best of luck to you as well.

[Aniih]

by the way... You're good debating 👍 weird people here, everyone seems to be supper intense. I was just for entertainment and I got a masculine lesson of male vulnerability. Haha That was cool.

[Opinion Owner]

@Aniih overall I really want the best for everyone. Truly I do. I’m not sharing my POV to win an argument or something selfish. Rather it’s about what you said above. I wanted you to see things from my perspective.

But I 100% believe there are some changes going in our culture that’s harming both men and women when it comes to dating. Not to drag this on but I’ll give you a quick example.

I have a former female friend who I briefly connected a few years ago. I knew her since she was 21 and she was 30 at the time we reconnected. I remember her being one of the more practical and open minded women I knew back when we were younger. That’s why I was friends with her.

Well when we reconnected I noticed she changed a lot and not for the better. She once told me she planned to stand a guy up on a date just because he called her “babe” twice in text message. I read her entire convo with him. He was very flirty but didn’t say anything rude or stupid (e. g. d pics, mentioning sex, etc). But she was 100% okay with just standing him up on a date she agreed to go on.

I told her it was okay to cancel the date but at least give the guy the respect of knowing she wasn’t coming. He might of rearranged his entire schedule to meet her (I’ve had to do this for dates). If I was that guy I would have been pissed off.

I also told her that if she was so deathly afraid of his response then just text him she couldn’t make it and then quickly block his number.

So as it turned out he texted her first saying he couldn’t make it. This left her all “relieved” because she didn’t have to have a “confrontation” about canceling the date. But he had the respect to tell her he couldn’t make it. Why couldn’t she do this?

Now this exact same girl would have NOT been so rude about standing this guy up when she was younger (and in a different time era).

So what happened? Modern culture happened. It’s harming both women and men.

[Aniih]

Uhm my anonymous friend, could you imagine other potential 4 options?, Bad experiences, hormones, bad day, she is becoming grumpy towards people? Not everything is about gender. What you think?

[Aniih]

I must sleep now, but thanks for your POV, was good feedback, would be nice to find more people and conversations like this out of an app :) happens almost never.

[Opinion Owner]

@Aniih so as for those 4 other experiences:

Bad experiences: I’ve SEVERAL bad experiences with women in my life. Horrible experiences. But I know damn well that it’s not right to punish one woman for what another woman did to me.

It’s not a “my team vs your team” game here. That particular girl’s reality is what she experienced with me. I can’t use other bad experiences with other women as justification to mistreat someone else.

Sure my mind might want to go in that direction given my experience but still I have the self control to know two wrongs don’t make a right.

Hormones: yes I know women are complicated hormonally. However men have fluctuations in testosterone levels that impact our behavior as well. There are times i feel extremely horny, aggressive and other times i feel tired and unenergetic.

However when you hit 30 you are supposed to be a grown ass adult. You should have better self control. You should be able to handle this better. We can’t act like we hit puberty yesterday.

Bad day: again what I experience outside of my relationship doesn’t justify how I treat her. I could speak up and say “I’m having a bad” so the other person knows how I feel. But I can’t take unrelated problems and use it at as excuse to be rude to someone else. I have the maturity to realize that.

Grumpy towards people: same as “bad day”. But this woman was once not like that. If she was I would have never did that.

I know that I can’t just let my emotions dictate my actions. I definitely emotions (and men feel the exact same emotions as women) but I have self control to handle them appropriately. If I do act out of line then I own up to it and apologize after I calm down. That is what respect is about.

[Opinion Owner]

Again this same woman wouldn’t have behaved this way in a different time era. But modern society is telling women to completely indulge their emotions as justification for whatever decision they want to make. However there consequences to your actions.

So let’s say for example that guy got stood up by former friend. Do you think that helps his attitude towards woman after he got treated so rudely? Sure it could have been a one off. However let’s say he’s had several other bad past experiences. Do that motivates him more or less to approach women and ask for dates?

Different story if she contacted him to cancel. But do you think disrespecting men doesn’t have any consequences?

[exitseven]

yes, the urban legent goes ha really good looking girls often spend modt of their time alone because most guys assume they are already taken or else if they made a move they would just get shot down.
When I was in high school there was a gkirl in my homeroom that was really pretty. I had a huge crush on her. She was not a cheerleader and she did not really hang out with the popular kids. I assumed she was going out with college guys. I tried to talk to her a few times but it never went anywhere. Years later I was talking to a kid that lived next door to her. He said that she always stayed home on Saturday night and never really dated anyone.

[Moose304]

About 10 years ago I was visiting some friends in Houston Texas. I can't remember if it was Friday or Saturday night. But, their 17-year-old daughter was sitting at home around 8 PM. She did not go out with her mother and her aunts. We guys were going to play poker and drink some beer. She came into the dining room where we were and sit down to watch us. I asked her why are you sitting at home. This was a girl that was her HS homecoming Queen runner-up. There was some kind of dance that night. Nobody asked her out. She was a bit sad about it. A lot of guys today simply WILL NOT approach a female they don't know. It's just a culture thing these days.

[Unit1]

Not to me 🙂 i like beautiful women. Very beautiful women too. Even the ones, that look rich, glamorous or have designer pieces. I love them all.

I am not a Gigolo. I love girls. 💕❤️

[shades777]

Beauty is intimidating when you not feeling up to par with the realm of possibilities and where it leads.


For example, I feel more confident in approaching a woman if I'm physically fit, money in the bank, and crib is accommodating and presentable.


Realistically for me, I'm not going to approach if I feel that I'll be unsuccessful getting laid because the ducks aren't in a row.


I hate to say it but the level of preparation for a woman thats not intimidating is minimal, but for me personally I need all that before I decide to approach

[arodriguez664]

Yes. It's actually common for really attractive people to have high levels of loneliness. The assumption usually is that the person already has a relationship, so most don't bother approaching. Really attractive people are also more intimidating, there's more subconscious social pressure.

[WindAtMyBack]

No, that is not possible. Guys WILL approach. They might not be the ones you want, but they will approach. I've known guys who would not go after anyone less than a 9/10.

Are there SOME guys who are afraid to approach a beautiful woman? Yes. But they are probably afraid to approach any woman.

Yea, smiling might help. It might also scare them off. For some guys the only thing more scary than being rejected is being accepted. If you understand that, then maybe you get it.

[Messianic_Monk]

There is a different between being beautiful and being high maintenance.

If the woman is very humble, kind, sweet and happens to look more beautiful than any woman I've met? I would regard her as beautiful and would consider approaching her.

If she is not... and wears a ton of expensive stuff... I would consider her too high maintenance and I would not pursue her.

So remember, be kind, sweet, humble, feminine and VERY approachable 👍🏾

[Shiningtempest]

@Messianic_Monk Personally, I see beautiful woman as more likely to be high maintenance.

[Messianic_Monk]

@Shiningtempest I do agree with you on that. I'm just saying that some beautiful women aren't. Some of them work hard for the money and aren't looking for a man to maintain that. But I do get what you are saying.

[EricSummer]

You answered it yourself. Smiling helps. A beautiful woman who also seems approachable will attract men like a light in the dark attracts the moths.

Of course, this can be annoying, so a very beautiful woman may routinely appear cold and aloof to ward off the men. She needs to make sure sometimes to still open up a bit only for the men she chooses.

[WanderingLoveWizard]

I'm so ridiculously hot that women are too afraid to even look at me, let alone talk to me.
My manly, god-like presence is intimidating and quite frankly a little frightening. Which is the reason so many women avoid me. They're afraid and I can understand that.

(That's what I tell myself anyway. We all have to cope somehow)

[Zachgoat308]

girls dont approach men

[WanderingLoveWizard]

Says you

[Zachgoat308]

If a girl avoids you after you talk to her or avoids eye contact, your probably not attractive

[Zachgoat308]

or you may be average looking but creep people out

[WanderingLoveWizard]

Lol. Ok bro

[Kaamraj]

No that's not possible, there surely is a guy who is accomplished or confident enough to approach. Remember it's the vast majority of men who have little accomplishment that over value a woman's beauty. Those who have achieved something know how to rationalize it.

[Miristheiss]

No.

Probably one of the biggest hinderances is for her to be approachable.

If you are in a pack of friends, hanging out with some guy friend, act like you are in a super rush a lot of guys will not see an opportunity to speak to you. If a woman really wants to be approached it helps to take on the available posture that allows someone that opportunity.

Of course some of the loud players will always approach no matter what her immediate crowd and environment is.

[Anonymous]

If she's not my type I can easily hang out with her or blow her off. If she's my type, or too pretty, then I won't make a move because I don't like rejection. I'll go to extreme lengths to avoid her unless I find out she's in a relationship then I can act normal and not be so skittish.

[Asker]

Lol I dislike men like you

[Opinion Owner]

Can you explain that a little more

[Asker]

You're a coward?

[Opinion Owner]

Oh, wow. That's a bad thing?

[Asker]

You arnt authentic.
You are a so called man who goes off of looks and status.
Yuck

[Asker]

You wouldn't even necessarily take personality into factor either. I'm not saying go with someone completely gross or disgusting but damn. She's probably have to be a 10/10 more like 15/10 for you to go say hi lol

[Opinion Owner]

The hotter someone is the less likely I am to say Hi. No way in hell I'm approaching anyone 7+/10

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah, I mainly use looks to avoid people. A great personality can win me over but if she's below a 6 or above a 6 I kinda just don't bother.

[Opinion Owner]

I consider myself a 4.5/10

[Asker]

Your 4.5 might be someone's 8 or 10.
You're just very shallow to me.
Just because you judge off looks.
I've been 10s whose personalities were so shitty they became literal 3s... good luck to you

[DamianTheSmikkelbeer]

@Asker Without good looks you are inherently disadvantaged in this world of ours, a biological truth that has existed since eve of humanity. Personality doesn’t mean jackshit for a male if he can’t attract a female to him in the first place, it’s a mistake many younger guys make nowadays believing their dad’s fairytale love stories about “this is how i met your mother” that turns them into wusses thinking that’s the way to reel a woman in. That romance has long been dead, you can’t just fish a woman in if you got a ugly face nowadays because the whole “i got a bigger paycheck then you and can take care of you” way of life is gone and the ability to literally talk to every woman and man in the world certainly don’t make things easier for eithe side. You ought to have a mininal of 7 in each other rating section if you don’t got the pretty face, know enough dudes who are ugly and were screwed in the starting-phase with romance in their life because of it. We’re rated like we’re on a groceries-list and i’ve had two sisters to be certain of that, men are luckily a little simplistic in comparison but the high value men that do exist know the game & it’s rules and will use their cards wisely to their advantage. I can bag any woman i want as long as she’s not a top-model because those types will ruin you financially and emotionally if you try to keep up, unless you’re a high-roller but you’re blessed with that only. Give me a single drink and my confidence turns 10+ and i’m getting her, some take more dedication to the job and a lot of time but i’ll get it done. And no, by bagging i don’t mean having sex with her i mean getting her emotionally involved. Once she’s emotional in you got a safe-code, you can have sex with her on the same day you met her but her desire to be & continue with you apart from another mate is your sexual-performance & her satisfaction and physical turn-ons.

[FunkyMonkee]

Happens all the time!! He thinks that you're SO pretty you MUST have several boyfriends, already, and a long line of others waiting for THEIR chance so, there's NO point in him even bothering!!

[kellytheman]

Maybe some guys might be like oh she is out of my league and think they got no shot. Some guys might also be to shy or have low confidence to not to even think to talk or even look at her. I noticed if I see a beautiful woman or girl and be confident and not cocky they actually find it attractive and brave to that I talk to them and I got lucky most of the time
getting her number and hooking up with her

[Kris31]

From a man's perspective yes very much. If you are drop dead gorgeous it's intimidating. I think this kind of woman really need to (unfortunately?) man up and make the first move is they find someone interesting enough to throw a smile at them.