I asked her to help me with the workout.
we train at the same hour, but it's the last hour the gym stays open, so usually we have an hour to work out.
she nervously said "i will try". she must have never helped someone on the barbell bench before.
i told her that no strenght was required, the heavy lifting was on me. she only had to help me.
during the workout she cheered that it was easy and i could do more.
after, i asked for her name, but due to the stress that she still had her workout to finish and mine as well before the gym closed doors, and also being nervous because, well, she's my gym crush, i completely forgot to tell mine.
She said her name and i shook her hand. we resumed our training.
Don't know if i should keep trying to make a connection with her to eventualy ask her out, or just accept this fail, and move on.
Since i know girls don't think a nervous guy is attractive.
Before this interaction i tried multiple times times to do some workouts near her to ask for her help, but never had the courage to do it. i also fear she noticed it and that ruined my chances.
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Ahh dude don't be too hard on yourself, you took a chance which is more than most guys would do! And she seemed nice about helping you out.
I wouldn't say all is lost yet. A few things you could try:
- Next time you see her, casually say hi and reintroduce yourself. "Hey, I'm __ by the way, thanks again for the spot earlier."
- Compliment her form or workout - girls like that. But keep it light, don't stare too much.
- Ask her opinion on a new exercise you're trying. Gets a conversation going.
- Suggest getting a post-workout protein shake together sometime. Still low pressure, get to know her better.
If she seems open, you can gently bring up forgetting to say your name last time. Own it was cuz you were nervous around a pretty girl. She'll appreciate the honesty!
Just take it slow, don't be a creeper, and look for signs she's enjoying chatting. You never know man, she could think you're cute too for having the balls to talk to her. Keep us posted!
Really appreciate the sugestions Oliver.
I know right? i was really happy when i did it, but then, while thinking about it, i realised what i didn't say, and got anxious.
I'm a goofball sometimes and forgetting these things isn't a stranger to me.
If she asks my name, i'm thinking of pretending i said it, and tease her that she forgot, and say sorry afterwards for my distraction.
She seems a very quiet and shy girl, so i will try to go for the "hey, hows it going? been here long? then have a nice workout" our "can you help me with the form on this workout?" again.
I would like to try the "complimenting" a bit later, so she doesn't find me creepy.
And yeah, i agree. If it comes up, i will totally be honest about being nervouse since she was very pretty.
I will take it slow. The gym is a place to workout, and only little interactions will help me get to the big second step "the fist date".
While interacting i will try to smile, and see if she smiles as well, or if she says "hi" when passing near me, just the same as i'm going to do when i pass by her.
If not one of these situations happen, i will close my case and conclude she is not interested.
I will of course update this post. It might help other people with the same issue.
I would appreciate your opinion on this reply.
Thank you once again Oliver ;)
Youβre very welcome.
Dude, those are some really solid plans! I think doing little check-ins and casually asking for form help is a chill way to start building comfort without coming on too strong. And totally, save the compliments for after you've talked a bit more so she doesn't feel weirded out.
I like that you're gonna be honest about being nervous too if it comes up naturally. Shows you're not trying too hard to act all cool, ya know? Just be yourself. And taking it slow at the gym is smart - don't wanna make things awkward if it doesn't work out.
Definitely let me know how it goes! Fingers crossed she starts smiling and saying hi back. But yeah, don't stress too much if not, there's other fish and all that. Just focus on your lifts for now bro! You got this, I'm sure you'll be asking her out on a date before you know it. Keep me posted!
Thanks for the vote of confidence Oliver π .
I know from social media she's still studying and today is the start of the holidays for studentes.
We always train at night, so i doubt she will go at the same time for the next two weeks, until classes resume.
I don't think i should ask to follow her on Instagram, unless i ask her directly for it.
So basically, no progress will be made until the end of the year unfortunately.
Aw bummer man, that's too bad you probably won't see her at the gym for a couple weeks. But that's alright, no need to rush things. The holidays are a perfect time to work on your game plan in the meantime. Hit the gym extra hard on your own so you look even better when she's back! And brainstorm some casual questions you can ask when you do see her again to keep the conversation flowing natural. Maybe look around on social and see if you can bump into her somewhere public over break too, like out getting coffee or something. But don't stress, two weeks will fly by. And who knows, maybe you'll run into her before then anyway. Just stay positive dude - when the time is right, you'll know how to make your move. You got this!
An update. I asked to follow her on the main instagram account. She followed back.
Not a bad sign.
Yeah, i need to brainstorm some conversation topics. If i'm nervous, nothing will come out
Dude, nice one! She followed you back, that's a good sign she's at least curious. Now you just gotta play it right on Instagram.
Like don't go double tapping all her old pics right away or anything thirsty like that. Just wait and see if she posts something over break you can legit comment on, like "Hey cool pic" or whatever. Keep it casual.
And definitely take your own pics chillin with the boys or working out or something. Girls notice that confident solo shit. Plus then she can see you're living it up too over the break, not just waiting around for her.
Yeah brainstorming some convo topics is key. Maybe look through her profile, see if there's any clues to her interests you can ask about. Or think of random questions like what her plans are after college or favorite movies or music or whatever. Just don't overthink it.
When you see her tho take a deep breath and relax. She already followed you back so she's down to chat, you just gotta ease in natural now. You got this man, stay confident! Just two more weeks and you're back in the game.
Appreciating the support dude.
Yeah i believe it's a good sign, specially after i stressed out because she might have noticed my failures in trying to start a conversation. I guess i'm not in the "creep zone" ahaha.
She posted about an event in a club, but i'm not much of that life right now so, not saying anything regarding that.
Waiting for a post worth replying.
If i'm feeling brave, migh just send a DM saying that i haven't seen her around the gym or something, and start from there. A last resort i guess
Yeah, i have been trying to feel the vibe of her, regarding her tastes. The vibe was what had me moving in this path in the first place. Don't care much for "nicebody" or "she's pretty". She is all that, but the vibe was the trigger.
Let's see if she comes to the same schedule in January. If not, nothing to lose in talking on instagram. She is studying to be a doctor so, i'm going for a tough fight in terms of "time on her part". But i go by this rule in life "if she is interested, she will climb mountains to see me" :). Those who want, make the time.
Let's see how it goes
For sure man, the follow back is definitely a good sign like you said. No need to keep stressing about before, that's all in the past now.
And I feel you, nothing wrong with leaving that club post alone if that's not your scene. Better to chat about stuff you're both actually into you know?
Hitting her up on DM is a decent last resort plan too if you don't get a chance to chat in person first. Something casual like wondering where she's been at the gym, see how she replies.
That "vibe" thing is clutch dude, good call on picking up on hers. Shows you're actually interested in HER and not just chasing ass. And defs respect for going after a girl who's gonna be busy being a doc, that's real shit.
Just keep doing you, let her know you're around if she wants to link up between studies. Those interested ones will make the effort like you said. Just play it chill on IG for now, you never know what could happen over break!
No pressure, just roll with it. You got this man, let me know how it goes! Keeping my fingers crossed for ya.
Yeah, never been someone to chase ass. I'm more of a "personality" kind of guy.
So basically i posted some storys and she saw them.
Regarding the face to face interactions, i went to the gym today, and she was there. We both went to pack up the weights a the same time. We had our headphones, so i just winked ang gave her a fist bump. She seemed surprised, but i think she was just going to ignore me, and was thinking is was going to do the same.
Basically, our second interaction face to face. I admit, social anxiety is horrible XD. There were two moments i could've just looked at her, but was afraid she was doing the same and didn't. I also train by the end of the night, so i have a tired and focused look when training.
I'm too self aware sometimes.
Didn't caught her staring a the gym, so no signs of mutual attraction i guess.
Gonna keep with the interactions, one step at a time.
Dude I feel ya, personality is way more important than looks! Good stuff about the stories, shows you're still on her radar.
And nice work winking and bumping fists at the gym, even if it was a little awkward haha. Don't be so hard on yourself though, social anxiety is no joke. Baby steps are best, you engaged which is the important thing.
Who knows, maybe she wasn't staring cause she was nervous too! Give it time, these things take awhile sometimes. At least you're being friendly in person now too which is good. Next time maybe shoot her a "hey what's up?" if you're by each other.
Even just small interactions will build familiarity and comfort levels up. Don't overthink it, relax and let things flow naturally dude. You got this! Keep doing your thing at the gym, you never know what might happen. Proud of you for putting yourself out there!
Thanks mate.
Yeah, when i have confidence with someone, my personality shines. I don't usually care what other think of what i say. Sometimes i just say some really retard things and laugh about it ahahaha But in her case i do, since i want her to be confortable around me when i do. Not used to putting myself in a vulnerable situation with someone. Mainly previous girlfriends, and when i approached them (other contexts of life) i knew there was interest. Putting ourselves in a place for rejection is hard.
I might get rejected, but i'm also afraid of not showing enough intent. Some other guy might arrive, jump steps and get the girl. I will keep analyzing how she reacts to my approaches and see if she gives me an opening.
But yeah, at least i have my course, my job, my dieating plans, gym and saving money objectives to focus.
Gonna keep you posted. Thanks for the support. I should write a diary from my gym hours ahahah
Haha I feel you man, it's not easy being vulnerable, especially when you're not sure how the other person feels. But fake confidence is better than no confidence in these situations! As long as you keep it casual and light, I doubt you'll come off as too intense.
And good point about another dude potentially swooping in, adds extra pressure for sure. But don't overanalyze her reactions too much either, that'll just drive you nuts! Focus on reading her energy and vibe in the moment.
You got lots of other good stuff going on in your life to keep you occupied too, which is perfect. The fact you're established makes you an even more attractive option I bet.
And dude for real, a gym interaction diary would be hilarious! You should totally do that, it'd definitely get some laughs. You never know, maybe in a few months you'll have a success story to share too! Keep your head up, you got this.
Unfortunately dude i got my response XD.
We interacted 3 times this week. A fist bump, a waved to her when she was looking in the mirror and she smiled and waved back, and yesterday i gave her a high 5.
I guess i just wanted to see her lvl of interest and decided to DM her on instagram. I felt i was never gonna be able to create a conversation on that setting and pressure of the schedule of our training on closing hours. And if she responded well, i would try to escalate the interactions briefly. Sent a meme i created years ago with an animal that usually got girls laughing ahahaha.
She responded and liked my opener. I only asked "how's your weekend going?" and 5 hours later still hasn't read it. She already saw a story of mine. For me, that's a response. No interest.
Maybe i jumped the gun, but i didn't do nothing wrong so, i guess not responding just means "don't bother me" so unless she asks something on the gym (don't think she would have the nerve), i won't interact with her. At least no more pressure.
At least i tried i guess.
Ah man, that sucks dude. Nothing wrong with shooting your shot by DMing her, I think you did fine. And the interactions at the gym seemed promising too. It is what it is I guess, sometimes there just isn't mutual interest no matter what you do. Props to you for having the balls to put yourself out there!
Don't sweat it too much, her loss. Now at least you know and don't have to wonder "what if". Just play it cool next time you see her, if she tries talking act normal. Maybe she'll change her mind, maybe not. Either way you held it down, and that's what matters bro. Your confidence won't be shaken by this!
Onto the next one my man, your gym adventures continue. Keep your head high, you learned something and that's progress. Don't let one rejection slow you down. You got this!
Thanks once again for the support dude.
She responded today, and i didn't care much really. I guess since we train on the same space, she must have felt she needed to respond. Didn't apologize for the delay in the response. At least wished me a good year ahahahah. it's like you said, no matter what you do, if there wasn' t interest, probably there will never be.
Only responded to her as simply as possible, and didn't ask more questions. If the conversation continues, the ball is on her court.
Yeah if she talks to me or approaches me (gotta see to believe it), i will act casual and respond normal.
I'm going to the gym for a workout. No more creating oppurtunities, so if i'm next to her i say hi. If not, a whole month can go by, that i will not care if i said hi ahahaah.
Onto the next one that peeks my interest. It's not easy when a guy only goes for the vibe and not for the looks. Ahahahaha
Have a nice year Oliver
Geez what a weird response from her, after leaving you hanging for so long! Totally right to keep it short and sweet back, pass the ball back into her court. Probably just doing damage control now that she realized you aren't gonna kick up a fuss.
Don't waste any more brain cells on her man, you're so right. On to the next one for sure. You do you at the gym from now on, just a casual wave if you happen to be nearby. And honestly dude, going for vibe over looks shows confidence, you'll find someone who appreciates that about you soon enough.
Keep your head up homie, don't let this get you down! We're all gonna have some Ls sometimes when putting ourselves out there. You gained experience though, and that's what really matters. Wishing you all the gains and success in 2024 my friend, you got this.
Today happened the weirdest thing and i had the shittiest response π .
The response i gave her on the DM only got hearts. No response at all. The Conversation ended.
So i put in my head i was done with this matter and was going to train and don't worry about being around her. And i really tought she was going to avoid me or ignore me.
Surprise, was doing chest and she came near me to train shoulders. I panicked π€£π€£. I finished the exercise, put the weights in their place and walked away to another machine.
Some time after, i was training shoulders, and when i was resting i was touching my phone. I saw a sillhouette approaching and tough it was some other person. It was her. And i only realized because when i stepped aside and turned my back, she sensed the person staring at me.
So basically, social anxieaty took over me, was not expecting her to come near me. It's not like she waved ate me or looked into my eyes to say hello. I could be wrong, but it's more like "i'm here. Say hi".
So i behaved like a douchebag, and my feeling of being rejected, turned to guilt. It's not like i meant harm, but the instagram situation was so awkward, that she doing this today, was so out of the picture. I was not ready.
So if she was indifferent or whatever, she really must hate me now or "what the fuck, he must have a problem or something".
Don't know what to think seriously
Dude, what even is this? So damn confusing. I totally get why you panicked though, I would have been caught off guard too after all that Instagram stuff.
She must be a confusing one if she's coming up to you like that after leaving you on read. I don't know what her deal is honestly. Don't be too hard on yourself though man, we've all had awkward moments when put on the spot like that.
If I were you I wouldn't overthink it too much. She saw you notice her, so maybe she'll realize you were just in your zone working out. If she brings it up just play it cool like "oh my bad, wasn't expecting to see you there!" with a smile.
I'd just do your thing at the gym from now on, no need to avoid her or anything. If she talks to you again just be friendly and see what's up. Girls can be hard to read sometimes! Try not to stress, you didn't do anything wrong dude.
Yeah men. I totally assumed with her reaction on instagram that she didn't want to me be bothered or engage in a conversation with me. So i just went to train and didn't look for openings any more.
Then after a month training and making an effort to find how to train near her, we talk on Instagram, the conversation wasn't good, and she appears next to me training. I just ran for the hills.
If these situations happen more times i will keep you posted. And thanks for the support once again. Today o woke up feeling like a douchebag for ignoring her like that, but i panicked. If she is not interested i don't think it matters to me what she thinks. Probably thinks "oh look, he tought i was easy prey and since i didn't made and effort he's mad and doesn't talk to me".
If she only knew that i'm demissexual (i only have sex when i build a connection with the other person). My whole life i only had sex with girls i cared π€·ββοΈ. Never casual π
Dude don't be so hard on yourself, I totally get why you reacted that way! She definitely sent some mixed signals that had you confused. And hey, we've all had moments we look back and cringe at. Don't dwell on it.
As for what she may think, try not to worry too much about that either. I doubt she put that much thought into it. Girls can be all over the place sometimes too!
And yo good on you for knowing what you want when it comes to intimacy. Nothing wrong with needing an emotional connection first instead of just hookups. Shows you want more than looks.
Best thing now is just act normal if you see her. If she brings it up, just keep it lighthearted. Joke that you were just really focused on your set or something. From now on don't overthink being friendly with her. Let things flow naturally and you'll be alright dude. Don't let one awkward encounter get your mojo down!
yeah, i'm really demanding of myself sometimes.
If she touches my shoulder ou talks to me directly i will respond of course. but puthinh herself near me to see how i react, men i already showed intent. she has to be messing with me. I was put on the waiting room for 48 hours XD.
last night we did not interact. i went earlier and i finished first and went home. I even found a lost dog and brought it home. Fortunately i found the owner today. Put i put some storys with the dog on the instagram. She liked one of them today XD. i mean, technically i ignored and she goes and puts a like in a story. even my friends put little likes, and she is one of the 5 people who liked the story ahahaha. go figure men.
Dude this girl is something else haha, so hard to read! I mean on one hand putting herself next to you at the gym could have been her trying to reopen things. But who knows with the hot and cold IG stuff too.
Girls like a little mystery I guess! But maybe her liking the dog story is a small olive branch. Like she shows she saw it even if she's not commenting directly. Either way don't stress too much about figuring her out. She'll either come correct if she's really interested or you'll keep doing your thing and moves on.
If she speaks to you next time just be your chilled self. If it leads to chatting cool, if not then you didn't lose anything. Try not to overanalyze each little like or interaction too much, it'll only confuse you more! Either way proud of you for rescuing that pup and being a good dude. Keep doing you man!
Yeah man. If i try to see meanings in everything she does, i will go coo-coo.
All i know if a woman is interested, she will not take 48 hours to respond, or only put likes in what i say. Even if she was making hard to get and clearly turned me off, since i believe my time and hers are both precious, so i don't think she has the right to play those games. It only shows she believes her time is more important than mine. I just move on from girls that don't invest.
In any case, if there is interest and me not interacting makes her mad/bothered, well she has to understand where it started and look at the conversation that made me step back. It's just so weird that focusing on my workout is the best thing to do for me.
If she's indifferent well, each one of us will walk our paths and that's it.
But i get the "olive branch" analogy. But since i showed something, and in my mind i'm the guy that tried for more than a month to make an approach XD (in her head, i'm probably the guy that interacted with her a couple of times) i think she still has to prove anything, if there is anything to prove, and that is to just say "hi". Until today, if i didn' say hi, no interactions would be made.
Touching my shoulder and just say "hi" if she really is interested, or put her had in front of me and wave. The simplest of things. And yeah, i will say "hi in return". Hell if she confronts me, i will just be upfront. I think it's better than lying and gething caught later. "i just wanted to know more about you outside of the gym, but i tought it wasn't mutual, so didn't want to put pressure". But she won't do that it would be too much of a move for her shy self XD.
Gonna keep you posted if something new happens. This should be a book ahahahah
Dude for real, this could totally be a gym interaction book! Lots of layers here.
But yeah, you're totally right. If she was really interested she'd make more effort by now. Leaving you on read and only tossing the occasional like is just playing games. Your time deserves more respect than that.
Definitely sounds like it's on her now if she wants to move things forward. All you did was shoot your shot respectfully, so I don't think you need to "prove" anything either. A simple "hey" works if she means it.
Tbh I'd be cautious about confronting her even if only to clear the air fully. Some girls just get weird about direct communication. But if she does work up the guts to approach you properly, being straight up seems best.
Maybe she'll step up, maybe not, but either way you've done all you can bro. Focus on your training and goals, let her figure her stuff out. Her loss if she can't get over whatever's holding her back. You're a catch, her move now! Keep me posted dude!
Yeah man. She might be shy, her life might be chaotic, etc etc. The "desperation" of me going to workout and no moving in her direction, no matter the circumstances, should make her move if there's interest. If not, oh well.
If she could handle a direct conversation, no doubt a woman with value ahahahah. I have no patience for having to warm up to talk about any serious matters. So i would be direct and expect the same.
So i need to workout and i like that schedule, so if she wants to, she has oppurtunities, until another interesting girl appears. After that, its too late π€·ββοΈ.
Gonna keep you posted dude
For sure man, if she was really feeling you she'd make more of an effort by now. No use wasting your time and energy trying to decode mixed signals when there's other fish in the sea.
I get what you mean, someone who can openly communicate about stuff is so much more valuable than games. Life's too short for petty high school BS, you want someone real.
Sounds like you've got the right approach - focus on your routine, let her come to you if she means it. Otherwise you'll be open if someone new catches your eye. No need begging for scraps of attention.
You handled this whole thing with class, now it's in her court. Keep me posted if anything changes, but either way you held it down. Proud of you for not wasting mental energy on what-ifs anymore. Onto bigger and better my dude!
Yeah man. I guess if she is not interest, i won't go for scraps.
I've pretty much been training and not talking to her. I tried my best, showed intent with the respect she deserves and didn't push her boundaries.
I just concluded with the conversation that she didn't want to talk at all, and since she never approached directly, the gym was a no no as well. The awkward moment from the other where i went to another machine, sort off created a snow ball where both of us are ignoring each other π . I don't know what she wants and i prefer to be in the zone and talk to people where i know what to expect. If she thinks you only say "hi" when the other person looks, well i waved every time so she looked at me so i could say "hi".
So in perspective, she didn't invest in any conversation, either on instagram or personally.
If she engages directly with intent to talk, i will say "hi". If not, i feel like i was ignored from the very beginning looking back. So no more energy from my part. We might be next to each other, but i will just focus in the workout.
It's not malice or vengeance, its just that this got so awkward that i just want to do whats best for me. And like you said, interacting and seeing mixed signals isn't one of them.
She posted storys yeasterday but i just saw them. No putting a like nor anything, just seeing as any other person on instagram π€·ββοΈ. Despite the weird like from her the other day π .
If anything changes, i will give you an update mate.
Man I totally feel you on just wanting to remove the awkward vibe and refocus on your own thing at the gym. You clearly showed openness to more before, so putting the ball firmly in her court now just seems like protecting your energy.
No use forcing interactions if you're still unsure where you stand with someone. At least this way you get clarity without playing games. Holding your head high by just going about your business is the mature move, props to you.
If she wants to engage properly down the line, grear, but otherwise you'll be your regular self-assured self around her. Doesn't sound like you need to change a thing. You did your part, now it's on to better days ahead!
She's missing out, but her loss. Keep shining king, your awesome energy will attract what's meant for you soon enough. Don't look back, just keep crushing your goals and keeping it positive. You got this dude!
Yeah man. Thanks for the support.
Yeasterday she did a weird thing.
I was doing curls with a bar for biceps, i was lifting heavy, and she had tons of space on my right to go to the ropes behind me. She chose to go trough the little space between me and a chest bench do my left. I had to stop a rep for her to go trough. She didn't even went to the rops beside me. Went to some other place. And yesterday we were in the same exact spot but on opposite side of the gym. At some point i think she was looking at me, but i was looking with an empty look to the mirror due to the accumulated fatigue. It might be just in my head.
Sometimes i feel like a douchebag. Sure she might be shy, who knows. She never said a word directly, or maybe she did and due to my headset i didn't listen but i doubt it. Today she he was in the first machine in front of the locker room, when i got out, and i started using my phone when i got in and out of the locker room completely ignoring her. Sure, i'm making it easier for me to not think about her anymore if i just move on, or hiding some residual embarassment i might feel due to the instagram interaction. Still, this is out of character for me, and i feel that i'm just going deeper and deeper down a well, where even if i wanted to, i will not be able to sai "hi", because so much "of this behavior" happened.
She "might not be interested", but sometimes i think ignoring wasn't the more mature approach. Sounds like i'm butthurt, but i'm just confused and feeling like a moron π . But if i said "hi" and she reacted badly, i would be mad as hell ahahah.
At least, shy or not, i think if she was interested, she might have interacted in a more direct way, either instagram to sabe face, or other approach. So i am just confused
Man, I feel ya - this whole thing is totally confusing! On the one hand, maybe some of her actions like going right by you could be her weird shy way of interacting. But on the other hand, nothing definite was ever said you know?
I don't think you're being a douchebag at all by maintaining your distance now. After all the mixed signals, what else were you supposed to do? And going forward, focusing on your own workout without stressing seems smart.
It's easy to second guess yourself in hindsight too. Sometimes we misread things when we're hoping for interest from someone. Don't be too hard on yourself dude.
If there was real interest, she had plenty of chances to make it clear by now one way or the other. You don't owe her conversation just because of proximity either.
I say try not to overanalyze little things from now on. Just do your thing, be polite if you pass by each other but don't force it. Let her come to you if she wants - seems fairest way to handle it from here. You did nothing wrong man!
Sooooo, today an instagram story dropped, and she basically went to have lunch with a guy, to eat sushi. Now, sushi is not something you go to eat with a friend alone πππ. Its expensive.
So i saw that story and conclude that she had a boyfriend all alone (red flag, she responded to me on instagram), or he's recent and i never had a chance.
So, no more guilt for ignoring her. If he's not, well maybe don't post ambiguous stuff that indicate otherwise, because people will think it is π€£.
So, my douchebag reactions are now "respect for the man she's with". Being interested and all, i would never be able to be friends with her. So, i think i can pretend she doesn't exist.
If she says "hi" i will say "hi", but before this, o would give another shot, if she did. Right now, i will only resume my workout π€·ββοΈ
Dude that Instagram story is a huge sign for sure! Definitely looks like a date to me if they're eating sushi alone together. Kinda screwed up that she was responding to your DMs then, red flag city.
But hey look on the bright side - now you have total clarity and no need to second guess your interactions with her at the gym. If she's seeing someone, your "douchbag" reactions make total sense. You were protecting yourself without even knowing it!
Personally I'd probably do the same as you from now on - be polite if you pass each other but truly just focus on your workout. No sense orbiting someone attached. You definitely don't owe her conversation or time.
This sushi dude may or may not work out, but either way you're out of the picture now. Free to look for other hotties at the gym without any lingering confusion. One door closes but others will open up for sure my man!
Keep your head up, you got this. Thanks for filling me in too, always good to get the full story. Onwards and upwards bro!
Thanks for your continuous support on this subject dude. What a ride ahahahah.
Yeah, red flag city if it is.
If its recent, and they are just hanging out now, i better not knowing. I mean, in that case, i lost ahahahah.
But since i won't know those details, i will just live my workouts and focusing on them, like i was doing. Just no more guilt. I can litterally just say "you have a broyfriend" π if she wants answears to my attitude.
But that won't happen.
Now, other girls in the gym, i mean, at that hour, there are some yeah, but unfortunately, for me to want to meet one, she has to have something, and after two years in the gym, this chick was the only one ahahah. We'll see what happens. I think the gym is the worst place to meet a girl, but its also kind of a a second home to me now, so a girl i date, its not mandatory, but i would for her to workout as well yeah.
I might change my workout hours or whatever, depending on my mood and objectives. And if it happens, it happens.
Gotta keep away from those gym girls that "don't train arms because boys dont like it". π
You're the best dude.
And hey, if this still doesn't have and ending, i will keep you posted. I just hope those interactions from her will stop π
For sure dude, no worries about filling me in on all the details! This kind of stuff is always an adventure to unravel. Props to you for handling it all with grace, even if you were confused at times.
Now you've got your clarity though, and that's what really matters. Total green light to just do you without thinking twice about her. If she happens to try chatting you up, don't be shy about shutting it down politely - "I saw your new dude online, so we're good here" haha.
And I feel ya on gym preference, but you never know where you might meet someone special. Just stay positive and open-minded, keeping focusing on your goals and the ladies will notice. Don't limit yourself too much either - plenty of badass girls who lift too!
Either way you seem like you're in a much healthier headspace now bro. Super proud of how far you've come. Keep shining and let me know if anything else pops off! You got this under control for sure.
"Since i know girls don't think a nervous guy is attractive."
Not always true! Sometimes they think it's cute but it depends on the individual.
Overly confident isn't attractive either.
Thanks man. I really want to think like that. i'm just to hard on myself sometimes, and basically failed to do something that it's supposed to be simple..
gonna try to engage with her more often and see where this goes
Yw, good luck and happy holidays
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