Am I mistaking a natural flirt’s behavior for genuine interest?

[Anonymous]

For my job, the people I work with switch from shift to shift. Sometimes I meet new coworkers, other times I reunite with familiar ones. There’s this coworker (32M) I’ve become more familiar with in the past couple of months. He’s Latino, extroverted, and has already befriended other male and female coworkers. He is known among my coworkers as one of the biggest flirts and has hooked up with people before (I don't know about now).

This all started when he waited with me until my Uber arrived after a late night shift and I thanked him by gifting him an origami flower, which he framed. Besides me joking around and roasting him and him trying to flirt with me, we’d usually have many topics to converse about (our interests, food, animals, etc.).

He’d sometimes greet me with a hug and call me “my love” or “sweetheart”, look at me when I’m speaking with others but would immediately turn away when I catch him looking, and would somehow be near me even when we’re not talking to each other. However, he forgets things I’ve told him already and doesn’t initiate conversation topics with me.

One time, we ended a shift earlier and found out our trains were in opposite directions. He suggested we go get boba, extending our time together. He also paid for my drink. I think he was looking at my lips at some point because when I smiled, he smiled the same way.

Last time we worked together, two things stood out:

He was somehow almost right behind me when I was working on something. I was startled when I noticed him. One of the female coworkers scolded him in Spanish (maybe for scaring me?). He just looked at her and said nothing.

We had a bit of conversation and when it came to an end, he stared at me intently without a smile on his face for a few seconds. I got nervous, looked away, and asked a question. That’s when he finally looked away and replied.

My friend says “he likes you” and “men are just weird”. Help me shed some more light on this situation please? 🙏

[Purpleronnie]

I would say he was just a flirt but you clearly want it to be genuine interest.


When I have been interested in woman I def make a conscious effort to continue conversations we have had and ask her over things she has said as well as always trying to be around her and learn more about her partly to make it really obvious I’m into her. The fact he doesn’t do that tells me he is just a flirt but it’s not as if all guys do the same thing is it?


Why don’t you just ask to spend some time with him by maybe inviting to hang out with you and others either from work or your own social circle and attempt to find out if he actually likes you.

[leviopperman]

if he forgets stuff you told him, he's not into you

[_Jenny_]

I don’t think so but I might be wrong

[Anonymous]

Yes, you are.