Men don't care about women's accomplishments?

Question

From an article I just read :
''A woman can brag endlessly about how much money she makes, the deals she's has closed, the celebrities she's rubbed elbows with, or the awards she's won: none of it matters to men. This might seem harsh, and it is perhaps slightly hyperbolic; after all, it is fairly interesting to know that a girl is successful at her job, or that she works with someone famous - and an award is always impressive. But none of these things translate into sexual or romantic attraction. 

I am sure there are some women who grew up understanding otherwise. Or perhaps, having been dealt mediocre looks and a poor figure, others decided that they would pour their energy into their academic degrees or career rather than their beauty, and then proceeded (not without help) to dupe themselves into believing that men would like them for it. Unfortunately, this isn't the case, as many 30-something single career-women are currently realizing - the hard way.''

That sh*t can't be serious...
I've lost the little piece of hope towards human race.

Theguyoverthere · Accepted Answer

A lot of guys notice that "career women" limit themselves in their choices of dating and still remain hypergamous. So the more money a woman makes, the less choices these women tend to give themselves in their dating. If she makes 50k a year, she'll only look at men making 60k or higher. So many men are gonna ignore higher earning women not because they necessarily feel worthless, but because they feel that when they say how much they make, she'll lose interest. Yes there are some intimidated men but a lot of women will assume intimidation out of ego too preemptively.

Also remember, anyone, man or woman, coming to a date bragging tends to be a turn off. It causes them to be looked at as having that "better than you" attitude. So the guy may find being successful to be a turn on, but when you got these women bragging so much, it turns into a turn off.

Overall I think the article's just trying to promote that silly idea that "guys only care about looks." This sounds like an article that came from a woman who tried bragging about herself and got rejected.

kairon156 · Accepted Answer

Quite a few articles about men written by a women seem to be very sexist not against other women but against men and how we actually are vs the one or two guys she knows in real life.

Rather I'm interested in a girls achievements largely depend on if I'm interested in the topic of those achievements. If she goes on and on about some sports career she has I couldn't care less. On the other hand if she talks about musical instruments she can play or games she has plaid I would be more fascinated about her achievements.

I love the idea of a successful woman who can afford to pay her own bills and buy toys she might want. last thing I or most guys need is a woman who's just there to drain our finances.

Off topic: nice guys have been dealing with something similar but when guys talk about it they are looked at as being childish or just wining because they are single.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

What people don't realize is that women have ambitions because they have brains and personality quirks that influence their likes and hopes. It's not about catching a man.

That being said, being pompous, arrogant, a know it all or condescending looks bad on either sex. Men just get away with it more because it often comes connected to something else a lower level woman wants, like money or status.

Likewise, looking good and attraction also matters for both sexes. This article exaggerates the difference between men and women's wants.

523206720 · Accepted Answer

I think what people want is a combination. If the girl is attractive but also successful. If she is successful but not attractive - guys probably won't date her unless they need the money or have difficulty finding girls to date but beauty doesn't last and success does.

itsme_goodsamaritan · Accepted Answer

I think men who do that are losers.

ScruffyNerfHerder · Answer

The excerpt is dead on.

Of course with some exceptions, women care what a man's career looks like--not so with men. Why do men compete in careers and elsewhere? To attract women. A woman's accomplishes don't impress men, because accomplishments attract women!

Equality does not (and should not) mean being the same, a mistake in thinking many women seem to make. What attracts a woman to a man is NOT what attracts a man to a woman. And what attracts a man is NOT sex, and NOT traditional roles, (except for little boys)--if a woman wants a top man, she damn well better have more on offer than her vagina--but her career is not one of those things (to be clear, I expect a woman to have a good job--but it has no bearing on my attraction to her).

A woman being successful in her career is great--but if anything, it makes me want to *hire* her, not fuck her.

A girl recently was really into me and told me about the great things she was doing in her career--smart, cool girl. But my attraction for her died as she spoke--I was not "intimidated" by her accomplishments (who started throwing that idiotic term around?)--it was that she clearly did not understand men AT ALL. If she hadn't taken the time to think about what a man wants in a woman and cultivate those qualities, she's unlikely to be a fulfilling partner, no?

That's what I do for women--find out what they desire and appreciate and try to become those things, to correct where I'm lacking (a good lesson for the bitter manosphere sort). I expect the women I enter relationships with to do the same--and most people, man or woman, don't do this.

Be clear--this is not a knock on a woman's accomplishments--those are great. But if a woman thinks it will help win a man's heart, she is very tragically mistaken.

sa230e · Answer

We do care. It's just that our attraction to you is not dependent on your accomplishments and that's what the article is saying. If you're a highly accomplished person, men will not withhold their respect just because you are a woman. We are very much capable of appreciating your success. It just doesn't make us any more or less attracted to you.

I don't like the tone of the article, though. It seems to imply that for women, time spent on education or their career is time wasted. There are more things than romance needed for a fulfilling life and I think it's important that women not neglect them. There's more to life than getting a man and your worth as a person is not a function of your physical attractiveness.

kheserthorpe · Answer

Completely accurate.  It's not that men don't care that you as a human have done those things. It's that it doesn't change whether we want to be in a romantic relationship with you.

DanAG · Answer

I don't care about a woman's accomplishments. I don't care about a man's accomplishments either. I only care about whether I like the person or not, and that has absolutely zero to do with "accomplishments". I couldn't care less if someone dropped out of school in the 5th grade and works at McDonalds, or if they are the CEO of a major corporation and make 10M a year.

I consider most things that other people consider accomplishments to be fairly trivial. I'm not in the market for anyone, but if I were, gimme the hippie chick any day over a doctor or CEO. If she can keep the chrysanthemums and irises in bloom I'll be impressed more than any degree or title. That's someone I'll go out and chop the firewood for.

JSmuve · Answer

Yup so true. None of that stuff matters.

The only things that matter are 1) is she hot? 2) can she cook? 3) is she a bitch?

That's it. Unless she's so rich that I wouldn't have to work, nothing trumps those 3 things.

Anonymous · Answer

It's not that men don't care about a womans accomplishments... If a woman accomplishes something that not a lot of people do we find it impressive and appreciate what she did to get there... We (most) just don't find these accomplishments attractive in terms of finding a partner. You could be a surgeon that has saved millions of lives or you could be a bagger at a grocery store. If we like you, we like you and your profession isn't going to change that. Obviously a surgeon saving a lot of lives is a huge accomplishment and we definitely respect a woman that is able to do amazingly well in her field of study, but her accomplishments or lack thereof aren't going to make us want to be with her any more or any less. I think it's kind of sad when a woman wants to be with a guy because of his accomplishments. I know not all women are like this, but the ones that are... I think it's kind of sad. By sad, I mean pathetic.

Tractorbeam · Answer

I think they've missed an important point in that article. A man won't judge a woman by what she has to show, or her accumulated wealth. He will judge her by what what she went through to get it.

Efforts and achievements are valued, but material wealth is a low priority.

Women are more likely to just be impressed by the assets, regardless of how they were obtained.

NoUsernameSelected · Answer

Ahem...
I think you are completely misinterpreting this. You said:

> I've lost the little piece of hope towards human race.

Because you think men only care about looks and women care about so much more. The reality is that makes women even more choosy than men.

Men care "only" about looks. Women care about looks and social status, but that's not 50/50 it's on top of each other. In fact men rate 50% of women above average in looks, women only 20% of men. Than to top that, they add social status to that decreasing it to 5-10%. The bar for women is like comically low compared to men's to be considered desirable, see it as a blessing that it is - since men are judged more harshly.

Do not wish for men to have the same standards as women. Because the human race would be over - so nothing left you could have hope for.

pr3ttybr0wn · Answer

not all men think the same. if you look at a lot of influential and successful men a lot of them go for the not so attractive accomplished type. not all rich men go for the best looking women without care for their accomplishments. and even if they did its all a matter of personal tastes.

also you can be into your career and into your looks. not all career women are fugly

ASOIAF · Answer

Deal with it. The purpose of sex and relationships isn't to reward people, its to create a viable next generation for the species. To do this the females apparent health and fertility are important, not her achievements.

Women don't care about male accomplishments either, unless said accomplishments bring wealth or fame, even those things don't really translate into attraction, women will just behave like prostitutes for wealthy or famous men.

daniel_honey_boy · Answer

That seems like one of those BS articles made to put career women down. x__X
A career, accomplishments and being wealthy don't detract in any way from a woman's attractiveness to me. Being driven like that is actually quite cool; I'm attracted to that mindset. Whether or not she's my type is another matter, but that's the same with any girl. My requirements aren't exactly so high that she needs to be a full-time beautician, pfft... ! Silly article. :P

RationalMale · Answer

It's pretty much true. Women are highly attracted by those things in a man.

It doesn't matter to us when dating. Looks create interest and personality/character then make us like you or loathe you.

Your awards/degree/how well traveled you are won't matter to a man as far as sexual attraction/dating attraction is concerned. Your degree/job doesn't turn us on or make us want to date you more.

Roycaryn · Answer

What if you came across a guy who was bragging about all that? What aside from his apparent unattainability would be all that attractive about him? I agree that the last paragraph in that article is pure BS but look at from another perspective. People who put too much energy in their careers tend to lack personality and compassion regardless of gender. Why should anyone be attracted to that?

RosesAreRed2020 · Answer

LOL who wrote this article? Consider the source ALWAYS before the words spoken.
I have seen other trends with this. I know of three valedictorians from my high school years who were models (signed with agencies) with rockin bodies and were presidents of like every club they were involved with. They got into and attended schools like Princeton and Harvard. Women don’t pursue education because they’re unattractive. That’s just nonsense. I worked on Wall Street during undergrad - any uneducated woman would definitely not be able to hang with these guys for long as these guys are aggressively smart and confident as hell. They need someone who gets it. Most of the smart and successful guys I know, and I know plenty, are all only with women who have a lot going on for themselves. I think a man has to be pretty insecure to go for someone he considers to be less than intellectually.

Izzy2102 · Answer

Unfortunately completely accurate from what I read on this site.
Hard cold truth is, men care about looks and little else. Occasionally they throw in things like being nice and sweet but it's often sporadic

rUinSAYAN · Answer

women see a man with a well paid job in a better light, whilst men see a woman with a well paid job.. yeah like a woman with a well paid job.

what men need is not satisfied by money or honor, those things can be done by the man himself. the values men want in a woman are those you can't buy

OatsnWhey · Answer

Well, I'd imagine that a highly successful man doesn't have much in common with a woman who dropped out of high school working at some minimum wage job. There would just be a difference of values and personality at that point. However, status and success are much more important for men to possess in comparison to women in regards to dating and attraction.

Anonymous · Answer

Whoever wrote that has hit the nail on the head. 100% accurate.

Unfortunately for five decades now, people have grown up being lied to that men and women are just the same and gender is a social construct. So people just assume that the opposite sex thinks like them.

It's funny that the white-knighting answers on this thread say the exact same thing as the quote but try to make it sound less harsh

Anonymous · Answer

Personally I think that if a woman doesn't put any care into her looks and just focuses on her academic degree it is all realistic for her to expect attract attention from a man because men are more visual.

Think it's ridiculous to neglect your physical appearance even if you are working on your career it does not have to be like that.

And women shouldn't expect to get A man if she can't even take care of herself

harakiri · Answer

You should watch 'the politician's husband'... It's on Netflix. It essentially shows the lengths a man will go to to be dominant over his wife. It's disgusting. Men are vile.

Men don't care about women's accomplishments?

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