Are witty/sarcastic women attractive to guys, or just annoying?

[Anonymous]

I have been told that I am witty, and at times very sarcastic. I try to control the sarcasm, but it comes so naturally and is a habit.

Is this possibly a turn off for guys? It seems that I am quickly placed in the friend zone.

And in a non-vain way, I promise, I have been told that I am attractive. I am a tall, skinny but curvy, pale-skinned, freckled red-head. And people also say I have a nice, and trusting personality. So...if it's not my looks (I promise I am not trying to sound vain, I just want answers!) Then is it the sarcasm that makes me not attractive?

It seems the guys have no problem opening up to me, but when it comes to dating, I'm "too much a good friend and special" that they don't want to ruin it...

HELP! haha.

Is it the sarcasm that always brings me to this demise? :(

I do appreciate feedback! Thanks!

[BowChickaBowwow]

Hi Red!

To answer your question; Witty/sarcastic women can be attractive. As long as it is defined and confined. Allow me to explain. If you lkiked a guy who was a natural when it came to sarcasm, you would love that he can match wits with you. But I gurantee you wouldn't want to end up in a competition of wits with the guy. This is where 'defined and confined comes in. Think of your talent (it is a talent) as something that you need to use in moderation. or someone like you it seems it will take some practice. Practice around your friends. Bite your tongue every now and then. Try using your sarcasm in CONFINED situations. Around Friends/Family. And allow yourself to define your with in the company of others. After making a sarcastic comment, quickly follow it up with a genuine smile or playful touch. Men and women do not want to compete with the one we love/like. Moderation should be the key here.

Best of luck! ;)

[Asker]

Thanks so much for the input! I loved the "defined and confined" as you called it.

It definitely makes a lot of sense, and have excellent points! Thanks so much again, I really appreciate it.

[BowChickaBowwow]

Not a prob ;)

[BlackSuperman]

It's just your're around guys who want that one type of girl, and your not it... it's the same conundrum that guys with yer personality get all the time... I say forget those guys and look elsewhere... either that, or just immerse yourself in your schoolwork/job. Those guys will most likely end up with some chick they don't want, but can't get rid of... You want the best guy you can get, right? Look, funny girls are attractive... personality coming out of everywhere! It's great to joke around with your chick, not having to worry about her being some little prissy priss that caint take a joke.

[MaJolieLouise]

Sarcasm: A mocking, often ironic or satirical remark intended to wound.

Hmmmm ... why would guys not want to date me if I tell them flat our "I am here to hurt you"? Every time you are sarcastic you send a message that you will hurt them - mock them.

Spend some time learning about myself and why sarcasm is an MO for you ... if it is a habit work on not allowing yourself to be sarcastic - when you have a sarcastic comment, keep it to yourself .. if however, it comes out "so naturally" and you can't intercept it and not say it then you need to figure out why you so want to hurt others.

[katherrrrine545]

I'm a pretty sarcastic person also so I'd like to know the same thing!

[Asker]

Haha! Once you fall prey to the use of sarcasm, it's hard to stop using it! It's like a drug or something. Very habit forming.

[katherrrrine545]

Yes! such a habit.. I find it very amusing

[salsa_shark]

Yes, it turns some people off, but other sarcastic people exist, you know. Even guys... and oh, we definitely all like sarcastic women. Those who do not are clinically insane. Or just different than me, but eh, tomato, tomahto...

...see? Point proven. I am a male and was just sarcastic towards you. Take that...and such...

[Abe90]

Thank god you explained to us at the end that you were being sarcastic. Only you knew

[Anonymous]

Unfortunately, men who believe in sarcastic women being attractive are usually sarcastic people themselves. Most men (and women) don't find sarcasm attractive; do not believe anyone who tells you otherwise. Sarcasm is usually considered a very low "dry" form of humor and is generally frowned upon socially. Basically, it's where one person mocks another in order to get laughs. Anyone who mocks another person in order to socialize in my opinion, isn't funny and has very serious mental issues that need to be addressed. Sarcasm is also indicative of insecurity as well. What is attractive however is someone who's outgoing, up front and funny (specifically without being "witty or sarcastic")
- PHD and Masters in Clinical Psychology

[Anonymous]

Witty --> turn on.

Sarcasm --> turn off.

With all due respect, I don't understand the humour in sarcasm. It makes a girl ugly.

[Abe90]

With all due to rudeness, you lack a brain

[ihatework]

attractive as hell to me