Guys, why do you try to make girls jealous?

Question

If you and a girl are actively flirting and it's clear enough that she likes you and you like her why would you all of a sudden start trying to make her jealous by flirting with other girls right in front of her. Doesn't it make more sense to just flirt with the girl you like and have that move forward? If a guy starts flirting with another girl in front of me my first instinct is to move on and assume he isn't that into me...So why do you guys do this?

superdudeman · Accepted Answer

it doesn't work on men, but it works on women.

Jealous promotes needy and clingy behavior. It makes women fight for their man and show more interest, call more often and thus it works.

The problem with making a man jealous is the fact that it makes him LESS attractive. He becomes needy and clingy, he calls more and suddenly you like him less.

The other thing it does, is like you said, it makes you assume he doesn't like you, which is actually to his benefit.

If he shows too much interest, then he's creepy.

If he shows none, than he's safe.

If he shows Disinterest, then you like him.

Creepy is showing interest too soon for no good reason, combined with wanting it more than the other person.

And if you want it more than he does (which now you are thinking about him now because of what he did, which means you are more invested in him than you were before, and more than some joe blow that you blew off 2 seconds ago) Then it works.

When its not working, its working.

And that's why men do it.

Men would not do it, if women didn't train men to behave this way.

Its obviously asshole behavior, but as we all know, women like assholes. SO congrats, you get what you ask for.

depressedguy · Accepted Answer

some guys are players and some use that make the girl jealous thing to test a girl to see if she really wants to keep him ... ya know that posession thing and if she doesn't care to want to do anything to keep the guy than the girl doesn't want the guy ...

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

He's trying to see your reaction, see how into him you actually are...sad but true. Now the next move from you is to let him know how to treat you. If you blow it off then he knows he can do whatever he wants whenever he wants and get away with it. If you don't blow it off then he will, or at least he SHOULD, never do that again because he knows there's a possibility of losing you and then he will be stuck with one of those nameless ones he was flirting with, and I'm sure he doesn't really want that anyway.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Guys try to make girls jealous out of insecurity. It's a stupid thing to do, I know, and not all guys do so, but some immature guys will try to test you by flirting with other girls. The best you can do is ignore him.

SevenWindsNineMoons · Answer

I have seen it used before. It is a tactic designed to make you think he has many prospects going for him. For guys, it is a balancing act remaining masculine and detached while seeming interested in you. The common wisdom is, if a woman sees a guy who is lusted after by several women then she will see him as a sort of "Alpha Male" and want to be with him. There are whole books and classes based off this concept and manipulating it with some degree of control can make otherwise unsuccessful guys more successful with girls.

Of course, some girls read this as being shifty and avoid those guys like the plague. Like any good war you choose your tactic and you take your chances. You throw out the paper and sometimes she throws scissors, sometimes she throws rock.

Tridentus · Answer

yeh. for me it's like an overwhelming instinct to make a girl who likes me jealous, I don't know why.

i might do it in front of a girl I wasn't sure about just to show her I'm not fixated on her, and I do have other options, I'm not some desperate guy.

it usually works to be fair.

but I would NEVER EVER do this to a girl if I thought she was the sort of girl who would just be hurt, some girls (usually the more "truetothemselves" ones) won't take that crap for a second, you can tell they just see right through what you're doing and start thinking of you as a jerk.

Anonymous · Answer

This tactic doesn't wash with me. It smacks of desperation and insecurity and I don't feed it by reacting. It doesn't make me feel special, it makes me feel embarrassed for him. It's usually done by guys who feel I'm out of their league, like they are trying to tell me they are in hot demand, so how lucky am I to have him. If you want to push a woman away, then this is a good move. Otherwise, don't do it.

Tylord92 · Answer

Guys that try to make girls jealous probably do it for the same reasons that girls try to make guys jealous. There are a lot of reasons people try to make each other jealous. Regardless it's kind of a shitty thing to do in my opinion. If somebody intentionally tries to make their significant other/crush/whatever jealous by flirting with other people that can be a red flag to not trust that person.

Makeuphoarder · Answer

This has happened to me in the past but he flirted with women that were fat, ugly, slutty and thirsty. There was one that was pretty & fit but I just saw it as him being a jerk because you don’t try to hurt those you care about. Immediately I took it as him not caring about my feelings and I wanted to lose him and not talk to him again

Ray2wice · Answer

Honestly I hate it when guys flirt with other girls it bothers me especially when U really really like that guy a lot and he's just with another girl laughing and having a great time right there in front of u the first time I got jealous was when I didn't even know what the word was for having this kind of weird feeling once I found out I was like ohhhhhh so that's what it feels like to be jealous but I hate the feeling so much then it just makes u wonder all day does he like the other girl and not me was he playing me and it just makes the girl each day just get over that guy 1 by 1

Giogiogio2011 · Answer

I dont, I would also care less if she was the jealous type. I rather have that in a serious relationship. but if she's clingy towards me then idont have to worry about her with other men. So tired of woman who think they need to be friends with every man who hits on them when they are in a relationship while men tend to push woman away.

FFStaylor · Answer

Because it makes you think about us more and keeps the spark.

It's a stupid thing, and I wish we didn't have to do it, but it works.

Girls don't like feeling like they're the only one until it's a relationship.

Anonymous · Answer

That's pretty pathetic. If a guy does this he's definitely not worth it.

I actually go out of my way to NOT make them jealous. Like only talking to another girl when she's not around. Because even if it's just a normal conversation, she will get jealous. Some girls get jealous over anything... like you can't even say 'good morning' to another girl.

Conscience_for_sale · Answer

Ok. This is dumb but it's the only rational thing I can think of. Guys like to make girls jealous so that the girl in her fit of jealousy might stake claim on the guy thereby assuring the guy he isn't gonna lose this girl anytime soon. It's like a validation.

Anonymous · Answer

I try not to do it intentionally but have done it on ocassion accidentilly. I was talking at one point to this girl who is a close friend she has a boyfriend so nothing is  going to happen, any way my crush like death glared her kinda like what the f*** are you around him for. I hope you don't count things like that as him trying to make you intentionally jelous

a400m-runner · Answer

jealousy lead to anger and anger lead to the dark side I would never intentionally try to make someone jealous. that just not smart thinking.

TimTim56 · Answer

Because he isn't confident enough to go about it another way. Girls do this too. Sometimes it will actually make the other person lose interest though so I don't suggest you or anyone else play hard to get too much.

doubleoh · Answer

I have no idea, but this guy really sounds like an asshole. Your story makes me want to punch him in the face. Please move on for your sake.

Anonymous · Answer

If a guy liked you and wanted to make you jealous, you would probably see him flirting with other girls in front of you or somewhere near where you can see.

Prilee1992 · Answer

It shows that he's having a great time with other people. If at a party, i will too try to engage conversations with random people.

Ghostwriter · Answer

I dont...but then again, its a lot easier for a girl to get attention than a guy. So I would say you have field advantage on this one.

DocClassic · Answer

people like to play games, and if you think that its only guys who do that type of thing, you have a lot to think about

sean1234 · Answer

That just seems weird to me. I remember what it was like at 13 and I just don't see me, nor any other guy I knew doing that.

KDA20 · Answer

I think B they might be intimidated by how pretty you are.

Nicefuture · Answer

I don't know Why,i myself wonder,my EX always say BS to make me jealouse but he doesn't know that it doesn't work with me.

PeachSunset · Answer

Its the other way around just as often you know? People are gonna be people, bitches-bitches, etc.

Anonymous · Answer

No, I don't play that game. It's pathetic, no matter what gender plays it. Total turn off.

apple24 · Answer

because he want you to like him more i guess or want him more,... I don't know lol

Green_Clarinet_Man · Answer

it's not my intention to make you jealous, it's my intention to give all my girls equal time

Anonymous · Answer

no, that is a game girls play. Guys generally don't do that.

Anonymous · Answer

Because they think it's funny to toy with people's feelings

BigJake · Answer

No, not at all. I don't play games with people I like.

Shiningtempest · Answer

Some guys plays mind games instead of being upfront.

Anonymous · Answer

Same reason women do it to men, they like to play games

Anonymous · Answer

no. if yes that's because he wants to speed up the "process"

enijah · Answer

some do, but not all ya know it's variable

Marciano1 · Answer

Same reason girls do it.

emzy-89 · Answer

he'd flirt with other girls mostly

Marstalk · Answer

The same reason girls do.

jacquesvol · Answer

I never tried that.

Guys, why do you try to make girls jealous?

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