How to keep hope when you keep having bad things happen to you?

My life has been horrible. I have two addict parents-one with a gambling addiction the other with alcoholism. In my family it’s like I had to be the parent to my siblings and my parents and I never got to just be a normal person my age. My first relationship form 4 years ago scarred me so bad that I convinced myself I was over it many times and still cry about it to this day. I get flashbacks of the moments me and my ex we’re together and think about how realistic his feelings seemed. I remember the moments he whispered how much he loved me while I slept in his arms and now I feel disgust towards him for lying. I have severe trust issues instead of “growing from the heartbreak” and “coming out a better person.” I always thought that in time I would win from all the losses and that something good would happen but al I have had since is a string of failed talking stages, I lost all my friends except for one because I became a social hermit, the one friend I do have has became somewhat of a therapist for me, I’m just not happy. And I don’t know where to turn. I’ve done so much for others in my life including all the people who hurt me-I currently letting both my addict parents live with me while they drain the last bit of life I feel I have left. I felt like I didn’t deserve this life. I’ve been a good person. I have tried so hard to just love people and take care of people and people think it’s so easy being pretty when really all it brings is just a bunch of people looking to use you or people who think you have it easy because of your looks. I’ve lost friends because they were jealous of my looks while I was drowning in misery. I’ve been strong for so long. I understand that there is nothing anybody can say to solve my problems and that asking for pity won’t do anything at all. So I’m not asking for advice on how to solve anything nor do I want sympathy. I want somebody who can relate to just give me some hope that things will change. How do I find that again
How to keep hope when you keep having bad things happen to you?
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