How should I follow up with a girl I have a crush on after sending her a yellow rose and not receiving a response from her?

[MagicHands]

There is this girl that works in my business facility whom I have been interested in for a few months now. The thing is, she works on the opposite side of me and as a result, it has made it very difficult to approach her. I have only seen her a few times from a distance and decided that I wanted to let her know that I am interested in her.

I sent her a yellow rose and a note with her coworker to drop off at her desk. (red or white would be too much in my opinion as yellows represent friendship.) The note stated who I am and what office I work at since she doesn't know me. It also stated that she caught my attention and that I would like to get to know her better. I sent this to her last Friday and haven't heard from her. I feel that I should probably approach her at this point to have our first conversation. But... now I am starting to feel like I may have creeped her out since she has no idea who I am and is receiving a random flower from a stranger.

I didn't know how else I could get her attention without being a creep "waiting" for her outside her office. Or something along those lines of just stalking her, because, I certainly am not. I am just looking to try and establish a connection with a genuine conversation. We just work together in the same business facility and I have seen her a few times. She caught my attention and I like her energy.

What do you guys think I should do at this point? Should I try and approach her with a follow up or give it more time? Let it go? Maybe she isn't interested?

And just to confirm, I did ask her coworker if she was available and they told me she is. Thank you for your time and advice! I really appreciate it.

[PrettyPriya]

I would say she may not be interested or at the very least a little shocked receiving a rose and note from a coworker out of the blue. It also may be a case of feeling uncomfortable about a workplace relationship.

Things can get really bad in workplace relationships. If they go wrong, it can disrupt productivity and cause very awkward situations to the point where someone might have to find a new job. She may be thinking about those consequences. It is why so many companies forbid relations.

As for how you get her attention? Why not just stop by and ask if she would like to have lunch or a coffee after work? Make sure whatever you suggest is outside working hours. You don’t want to do this on company time or where she won’t feel like opening up and not getting to know you.

My personal stance is don’t with a coworker but that’s just me.

[MagicHands]

It did not cross my mind that it could be work related. That’s something that I will definitely keep at mind for the future. Thank you very much for your response!

[Vegasrunner]

@magichands Hate to be the one ro break it to you but you messes up and you look like a creep. You also seem weak since you had to get someone else to present the rose. Chalk it up to experience and move on. Next time just use a direct approach (yes I realize the risk you face doing this in a workplace environment) go up to her start a conversation and close by setting a definitive date. If says no, move on to the next one.

[PrettyPriya]

@magichands Just a possibility. I am only guessing. There is no reason you can’t ask her directly if you company allows workplace relationships.

Still, it may explain the hesitation or reluctance. Then again, it may just be a bit of shock and not knowing how to respond. Either way, I wish you best of luck. Just ask her out! 🙂

[MagicHands]

@PrettyPriya I thought about this very carefully and I decided to not approach her. As much as I want to, I understand that workplace relationships are not very good to have. I've worked here for over 5 years and the last thing I need is any kind of awkward or uncomfortable workplace. Thank you very much for your advice, I selected you as MHO.

@Vegasrunner You are right, man. I messed up already by sending her a flower with a note. I probably creeped her out and let's say that I did not, I probably do look weak for having someone else drop it off for me. With that being said, no matter how difficult it is to approach a girl because of your distance, it is worth it to wait for the right moment. It will come and in person confrontation is always best. This one is for anyone that is considering doing the same thing I did, do not leave notes or gifts! Thanks mate, I appreciate your advice as well.

[PrettyPriya]

Thank you kindly for the MHO and best luck going forward. I do believe you made the correct decision.

[sage2021]

I think she might be a very private person and maybe people hassled her about getting the rose. She should have found a way to thank you are least and let you know what she thought about it. Maybe she doesn't feel she needs to explain herself to a stranger. But she could still have thanked you for the rose l.🌹

[MagicHands]

This is a great point. I can understand not having to explain yourself to a stranger. I was just hoping she could have at least acknowledged what I tried to do. It’s difficult approaching women but, I will take this as an experience and continue to be the best version that I can be. Thank you for your response and time!

[Anonymous]

'I sent her a yellow rose and a note with her coworker to drop off at her desk. (red or white would be too much in my opinion as yellows represent friendship.) The note stated who I am and what office I work at since she doesn't know me. It also stated that she caught my attention and that I would like to get to know her better.'

Where did you get this simp idea from?

'I feel that I should probably approach her at this point to have our first conversation. '

This is what you should have done from the start. But doing so now might be a problem. This makes me wonder if there is a self sabotaging part of your personality...

[MagicHands]

Yeah, I know, I know. I will be taking this experience as a lesson learned. I am still proud of myself for doing this because I need to start somewhere.

If you understood where I was coming from, you wouldn't think me as having a "self sabotaging part of my personality". I received experience from this and now know what to do for the next one. Just like anything in life, you need to try it out to understand what happened. Thanks for your criticism.

[Opinion Owner]

You're welcome. But remember, you don't always need to try things to understand what may happen, many have gone before us and so we can simply observe. It can save ourselves a lot of time.

[DoctorSex]

A woman is fundamentally attracted to two aspects of a male,
His tone/rhythm/base and his movement.
Everything else is secondary. I'm talking on the fundamental primal level.

If she isn't able to see you move or hear you speak, then she cannot form a primary level of attraction to you. In short, you can eat MC Donald's once or twice and that may be pleasurable and exciting,

But you can't live off that and eventually you need actual food.
Your voice and your presence is actual food to women, there's no other way to form genuine attraction.

Kind regards,

[MagicHands]

I realized that nothing was going to come out of this because the girl doesn't have a clue of who or how I am. You are 100% right about that. If she could see me move and speak, that would help form genuine attraction.

As I mentioned in one of my responses to another user on here, I just needed to wait for the right moment to have approached her. It would have been more natural and easier on her than some random gift with a note. Thank you for your advice, I appreciate it!

[CrazyGirl2]

I don’t know what is so special about a yellow rose, but if you sent her flowers, and you have not heard anything from her, like nothing… Dude, she is seriously NOT interested in you! Even if I didn’t want to date a guy, I would still thank him for the flowers. But just getting completely ignored? She REALLY does not like you.

[MagicHands]

I really appreciate you saying this. I most certainly was not demanding or expecting anything from her. I just wanted to tell her I felt and yes, a no thank you would have been just fine. I mean, I would have thanked a girl if she did the same, even if I was not interested. I just felt a little disappointed only because it took a lot of courage to do this. But hey, I’ll be mora prepared for the next one. I also wonder what I did for her to REALLY not like me… haha. Thanks for your help and response!

[CrazyGirl2]

Well sadly, some women just think they can get away with any kind of behavior because they’re beautiful. Because of my history, I had to grow up very quickly, and my mother told me that because I’m beautiful, guys will want to buy me stuff, and do things for me, like buy me food, drinks, maybe even buy me a car, or help me move! But it’s MY responsibility to make sure they know that I’m not romantically interested in him as soon as possible, and be as gentle and kind as possible. Try to say it in a way that he won’t be embarrassed to be my friend afterwards. She just doesn’t seem like a nice person, and you are better off w/out her… TRUST ME! Think of her as a bullet dodged!

[MagicHands]

@CrazyGirl2 You seem very mature for your age, it's impressive. I really appreciate your perspective on this situation. I thought about it and it's true, although I do not know her at all, she may not be a nice person. As weird as this sounds, I was going into this thinking I would get rejected. I told myself to not give up and at least try because that alone is hard for me to do. I at least made the effort to try and reach out. But to get ignored? I mean, she didn't have to respond at all since it was so random and from a stranger. But, at the same time, she definitely chose to ignore me to indirectly say no or just not care as you mentioned. I was thinking if she was that shy, she would have at least maybe tried to somehow say no. Regardless, I am happy that I did this anyway because it is experience for me and I will be more prepared for the next girl. Thank you again for your words of wisdom, I appreciate people like you. Have a lovely day!

[CrazyGirl2]

Well allow me to thank you too for your very sweet & kind words to me. Also thank you for your beautiful compliment in saying that you think I am very mature for my age… like I said, because of a trauma I was made to endure when I was just 13, I was forced to grow-up very quickly! More like my childhood innocence was stolen from me, so I had no choice BUT to grow up very quickly! But I was so blessed to have an amazing mom and dad who helped me and guided me through it all, no matter how difficult it was for them to see their little girl suffering so much, they never flinched, and they got me the help I needed when parental guidance was just jot enough. I would not be here today where it not for my amazing parents. Thank you again.

[Secret6620]

I think you may need to let this go.

It's literally the sweetest thing ever and any girl could appreciate the sentiment but it's still a bit strange to receive gifts from strangers at your place of work.

If she hasn't responded to your attempts to woo her, then it *could* mean she's not interested.

But there's no way to know for sure because most girls are too shy to actually reject a guy.

[MagicHands]

This is how I started to feel after I have given her the rose. I figure it was out of the blue which makes it weird and possibly made her feel uncomfortable. I don't like to ever prejudge but, I think it is clear that she is not interested. Thank you as well for your response!

[Secret6620]

Sure thing! ✨

[jennifer_bloom]

Maybe if you send her another note, include your photo, your stats, and a cute animal picture with a joke or quote. She might feel calmer around strangers who do that.

[MagicHands]

I thought about doing this a few days ago. But then, I felt like it would just add the to the creepiness or uncomfortableness that she "may" be experiencing. I figured she would have said something already or is indirectly saying no by not responding at all.

I believe the issue was leaving a random note and gift from a stranger and at a workplace.

Too much going on here and she doesn't even know what to expect from this stranger. I should have just waited for the moment that I could have approached her in person, even if it took a few weeks or months. The chances would have been greater this way, than the method I tried to use.

I also know my post will come in handy for many as I found a few similar posts about approaching coworkers in workplaces. It's just not an easy thing to do in my opinion. Thank you for your advice! I appreciate it.

[JakeS00]

She could be uncomfortable, especially if you both work together. I'm getting that she's not interested in that gesture.

[MagicHands]

That is possible, could be work related. Thank you for your post!

[loveslongnails]

If you do decide to approach her, it probably has to be something like " should I take your non-response to my reaching out to mean "no thank you?" What else are you going do?

[MagicHands]

It would probably be something like that. So, I decided to not approach her. I don't want to make things more awkward. Thank you for your post!

[Avicenna]

Just move on if she doesn’t respond.

[MagicHands]

Yup, that’s exactly what I plan on doing. Thank you for getting straight to the point. :)