How come some women think they can buy a man?

[Anonymous]

So she wrote me a message detailing what she bought for my husband in the past. For example, clothes, shoes, and etc including car payments. However, she has been causing tension between our families lately. Today is my husband birthday she posted old pictures of them together and basically gaining sympathy from their connection. Everyone was telling her he loves her and etc. Meanwhile we are married and the family thinks it’s disrespectful. So the family member sent her a friend request today on social media. My husband says she’s obsessed with him and he don’t understand why. She’s telling me she paid for his car insurance, car note, bought clothes for him and etc. she’s steady disrespecting me. of course he stood up for me but why she causing tension now? Everyone seems to be laughing at her.

[Anonymous]

I don’t think she’s necessarily trying to buy him, but instead relay his importance in her life, whether it’s past or present. A lot of people equate material possessions with their emotions. Like when a girlfriend or boyfriend buys this or financially takes care of that, they leverage those purchases later on down the road like “I love you so much I bought you this” “I care so much I bought you that”. In my eyes those people don’t have much else to offer besides the money they can spend. Also to clarify, I’m not implying there was any romance between them, I just think she wants him to understand how important he is to her. Doesn’t make her right at all and like you said it is very disrespectful.

[ShadowMonarch]

Breakups can be bad and some people just take it in deep, and by mentioning what she has done for him, she is trying to justify that it was wrong for him to leave her because of what she has done for him etc.
Just by reading the context anyone can say that she is being obsessive, confronting her can be a solution to this problem

[Asker]

They never dated. We were still married but she knew about me. She been trying to literally pay him off many times. He use to be a criminal investigator and she constantly kept asking him is he going to jail. She lied on her. This was way before we dated and yep they were friends. This didn’t happen until we got married

[ShadowMonarch]

TBH honest it is a very strange situation. Still, you should meet her and make it clear to her that what she is doing is not right and this needs to stop

[Asker]

She’s jealous from further conversation

[TheMajesticKing777]

Cause she's having a jealousy trip I guess

[Asker]

Right!!! He said this

[TheMajesticKing777]

It is what it is

[RavVid]

Your husband should be rejecting these gifts categorically - not accepting them. In what way is he standing up for you? It doesn't look that way.

[Asker]

This happened before we got together

[RavVid]

Didn't pick up on that. I see what you mean by buying a man now. Pretty disgusting of her

[Asker]

Right!

[RavVid]

I'd suggest calling it as what it is. She is claiming prior rights having spent money on your man.

Call it out. I know girls mostly don't want to be confrontational but really she is and you shouldn't accept that.

[In_Trance]

For the same reason some men think they can buy a woman

[Asker]

Thanks for your opinion