There is this girl at my church who I think is kinda cute (from a distance) and is very silly and constantly happy. Except when I'm around (which then kills that attraction). Not just that, but excessively rude. She's been like this since I went to this church a year and a half ago. It's like the moment I showed up she targeted me. She will go out of her way to be as rude as possible.
Examples: I had this big scruffy beard that I shaved off. I was in a conversation with some dudes and girls (of which she was there too) and we were talking about it. All of a sudden, she chimes in and says "ugh, finally you shaved that thing off. It didn't look good at all!" I played it cool and sad nothing. In my mind I was thinking "what on earth is your problem? I could say the same thing about that ridiculous purple hair you had for most of the year."
I join an app that my church is on and join a bunch of groups. Prayer chat, memes, etc. The first thing she does is block me. I played it cool.
My friends at church joke about me being Mexican (frequently) because a lot of people confuse me for being Mexican (even though I do not look Mexican at all). At one point, I made the joke and she barges in and says rather arrogantly "you're the only one that makes that joke, stop."
This list could've been MUCH longer, but I chose to keep it short. My brothers in the church have told me to ignore her. Which I do. I do not and will not seek out any contact with her. That seems to have made it worse. She interjects more now. Anytime I have to say anything (in a group), she just has to barge in and be aggressively rude about anything I say or try to start some sort of drama.
I've called her out and straight up told her she's rude to her face. And she gets OFFENDED by it and looks hurt when I point it out. And when people call her out and ask her what's her problem she basically doesn't have anything to say.
Clarity would be nice because I have never seen anyone act like this👍
What Girls Said
I would say first of all she’s just being plain rude and you handled it in a very responsible way because I would be livid. Also is she nicer to others than you or is she mean to everyone? If she’s only really mean to you then I would probably see if she’s friends or knows someone who doesn’t particularly like you. Since there’s a thing where if your friends with someone (unspoken girl rule) you automatically hate who they hate.
I will say that I am livid but I don't show my full lividness to her. But it's come out in some ways I am not too flattered about.
For instance, we were in a group. Someone made a Mexican joke (long after she rudely said something about it). In front of her, I declared that he should not make that joke because I'm the only one who makes that joke. Now I did apologise to him for putting him on the spot like that (and using the opportunity to throw shade at her), but I also was using it to try and say "hey, perhaps you shouldn't make that joke in front of her given the way she is".
She goes out of her way to be the complete opposite around me compared to how she is with others.
I mean her two close friends aren't fond of me (for no real reason I can see) and they've been taken care of by the church. People generally aren't that fond of them for how they've acted to me. But it honestly goes back farther than that. The first day I saw her I waved and smiled as I said "hello" and she basically told me to shut up. And I know for a fact there is no way she knows some of the people who dislike me because... those people live lifestyles that are incompatible with hers.
I get what you are saying and understand that... but why does she get offended when people call her out on how she's acting?
And here's an extra nugget that I did not have space to put down. Someone made a joke about me being her boyfriend... and I didn't get the joke. She did, and she saw my confused face and interpreted it as disgust and got REALLY mad and upset. ?
Thanks for your input, by the way 😁