i don't really know her well but we did meet and did a shot together at a bar a couple months ago. in 1 week were going to a pub bar crawl night together , well its a large group but somehow she is the team leader.
but i'm suppose to pick up a t shirt a couple days before , only thing is time scheduled does not work for me at all and zero chance i could be there , i don't know who else is going and not sure if there is any other options to pick it up. i guess they want everyone wearing the same shirt who is part of the event
she didn't invite me or anything , i do follow her on instagram and she posted about it a lot , and she lives nearby so though maybe she could pick up my shirt or maybe she knows someone else who could? but i'd have to message her privately online to ask as i don't have her # and nothing is posted online by the event itself as to other times or options i could get it
is it ok to ask? be awkward if she says no considering were going to be at the same event together for a couple hours next weekend and i had hoped to talk to her again there
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It needs to be convenient, so unless she’s already going to pick up her own shirt or offers this to the group, then I wouldn’t ask. You either find a moment between then and now to grab the shirt, don’t wear one or don’t go at all. If anything I’d go with the second option if you can’t get the shirt because you’re all adults and everyone knows shit happens. I guarantee not every single person will be in the shirt. I’ve definitely gone to a party without the theme if I didn’t have time to match it and get no pressure. Besides it’s a bar crawl not a wedding, you’ll be fine without it.
what if she's just the middleman as they say and is someone else who can pick up the t shirts for people like me who cannot be there? so i message her and she connects me with this other person maybe?
i don't think going with no shirt be a good idea as i'd stand out and not fit in the group if everyone else has one and already not entirely sure i'd fit in this group but have meet some of them before and they seemed ok with me and even done shots with me at bar
I don’t think everyone is going to have a shirt, that’s why I was saying not to worry about it so much it’s just a bar crawl. I’d say be more concerned if it were formal like a wedding, birthday, etc. But you have to do what makes you comfortable. Are the shirts at a location? Is someone handing them out?
i'm pretty sure everyone will be wearing this shirt , the shirts are being handed out at a specific bar at a certain time next Thursday but its a nightclub thats only open late fri/sat. the post online does not mention any other options or locations to get one
if i have the shirt , will fit in way more than if not , they haven't done this bar crawl since before covid so the last one was in 2019 , i can remember being downtown that night i didn't buy a ticket but bar was filled with people wearing the t shirt and it was a big deal , very busy night
you also get free admittance into the bars and discounted shots/drinks , so much easier for bartenders to know i'm with it if i have the t shirt on than not
Ohhh okay, thanks for expanding on that because I was under the impression that this was just a big group of friends planning to do a bar hop, very casual. But it sounds like the shirt is a big deal, so I don’t blame you for wanting it then. Are your names or anything specific as aligned to them? Maybe a certain number of shirts? I ask because maybe you could swing by after or before work if it’s open late, or call the location and ask if they could reserve one for you that you can grab the next day.
no names on them but are specific sizes , mine would be large. it is still a big group of friends doing a bar hop but part of a specific event i guess which is why everyone has a t shirt. i don't really live near that club , was only planning to go there Saturday night but would be there well before event starts like maybe 5 pm but not sure if i could pick it up before or not
Gotcha. Well I would still say to keep things convenient for who you’re asking. If they are already going to get their shirt then sure, you can see if they’ll hang onto one for you. But otherwise no, you don’t want her or anyone else going out of their way to get the shirt. If this is a big event or they’re expecting a decent sized turnout then they’ll probably have shirts leftover, but if there’s any way for you to stop by I think that would be best. I totally get you don’t live near that club but if it’s open til 2 which is usually the case with clubs, I’d say to go once you’re off work. Or call the club, and ask if they can put one aside. You have the name of it right? Why not call?
i could try messaging the club itself on instagram but say it has 16,000 followers so not sure i'll get a reply and a lot of tickets sold for this event. at least if i do message her can say i tried the bar first and got no reply so she was my last and only other option
Call first, someone will answer, especially if they are hosting events. Do you not feel comfortable calling?
i just sent a message on instagram but not sure i'll get a reply , noticed there website has a contact form where you can ask a question so maybe try that too but no phone # and there only open fri/sat
Bizarre for a club to have no number let alone be able to still be up and running when it’s only open 2 nights a week. In any case, hopefully you hear from them. But as I was saying before, how convenient would it be for that woman to get the shirt? Would she already be there?
she has to pick up her own shirt right? she's also the team leader or 1 of 4 according to instagram post so she has a lot of involvement with the event. i doubt it would inconvenient her to pick up 1 shirt but i get what your saying and wouldn't want to create extra stress for her that day when she's already going to be busy
It’s possible that she has to pick up her own shirt, but that’s the problem, you don’t know when she’s going, or if she already has one. Especially as a leader, if she designed it, one could’ve came to her in the mail already or when she made the order for the shirts. You just don’t want her going out of her way, that’s all. Like trying to squeeze in time to go grab you one, especially since you aren’t really friends or anything. Is there no way for you to get it after work?
its a mass produced shirt , its possible she already has hers as she's involved with the actual event somehow , not exactly sure how she is though
i'm not actually sure what my schedule is that day , off Friday as its Easter but unsure of Thursday
i heard back from the club online , there doing a second pick up on Saturday so should be able to pick it up then and won't be asking her to get it
wanted it to be a surprise that i was coming anyways so that works better i think , get to show up and be like i haven't seen you since... and see how things go
Oh that’s great! Glad you can get the shirt. Who did you want it to be a surprise for? Has it been a few years since you saw them like an old friend? That’s always nice.
its only been a couple months but feels like forever
Nice, hope it works out!