Where did the "women are more empathetic" myth come from?

[Anonymous]

Women can be just as shitty as men when it comes to trying to put themselves in someone's situation. But for some reason women are seen as the gender that's more empatheic

[MisterWack]

Women are genuinely seen as more empathetic maybe because they show other emotions than just ‘anger’ that men demonstrate on online forums.

Warm and welcoming allows for a more open minded and open ended conversation, being too aggressive / rigid can put people off…

Outside of online forums, women tend to put themselves in other people’s shows and have less narrow minded way of thinking that men generally do (I’ve seen it myself).

What I will say is women can be scummy like “Shut up boys don’t cry” and “Boys are the worst” as I’ve heard through my life…. We should grow as people since we are all flawed, let us be the best versions of our individual selves we can be and uplift each other not push each other down. Let’s be empathetic to one another and start seeing eye to eye. God Bless The Reader!

[D_Bone_Steak]

Man I wish I knew the answer myself. Women seem to take the cake when it comes to narcissism and histrionic disorders... I mean maybe gangster rapper types are just as bad as them.

I'd say it's the myth that they're so good with kids. I mean feminism and family courts have taken that narrative and ran with it for a very long time. Both have just exposed how selfish and evil they are in the long run in my opinion... but most normies don't read about it every day like I do.

What I do know... this question is going to absolutely trigger the feminazi types that just want to force all men to be gay and trans. That's why I'm here... I love a good shit show.

[Tomisworthless]

People say female teachers are predators for having sex with young adults but I dont ever remember in my 30yrs a woman wanting to prey on me once, so these kids that laying with beautiful and mature are clearly exceptional young men

[D_Bone_Steak]

@Tomisworthless The fact that we look at those boys and call them "lucky" while having the exact opposite reaction to when adult male teachers do it with young girls explains exactly how deep this issue runs.

I think what changed my mind was that 13-year-old who got his teacher pregnant and then as soon as he turned 18, they made him pay child support. Yeah that's not a lucky boy.

[Anonymous]

I love how men love to hate on women over the internet.

women ARE more empathetic than men.

take a look at our empathetic fields: nursing, social work, psychologist, Home heath aides, teaching, therapy. Literally every single job that requires empathy or understanding is FEMALE DOMINATED.

Studies also have proven that men tend to be more likely to suffer from sociopathy, antisocial personality disorder.

Take a look at the vast majority who start wars? who join gangs? they're not women

[Tomisworthless]

women have largely socialized to feel safe with many companions, most guys are too undesirable to be socialized with so we grow up a bit broken

[Opinion Owner]

@Tomisworthless

Men are more evil than women

[Tomisworthless]

Are we using the same standard of evil. Men live by respect, women dont they value worth by material, physical. Less attractive less deserving of respect, and the list goes on and on. I have only ever experienced the dark side of women, most men haven't and can't believe women would do such things

[Tomisworthless]

everything comes down to respect, treating others how you want to be treated.

[Opinion Owner]

@Tomisworthless

its always the men that talk shit about women online, never the other way around.

this explains why men are more evil.

take a look at who is statistically more likely to commit crimes. its not women

[Tomisworthless]

I wonder why

[Shiprex]

How come they're doing such a poor job of educating boys then? That's not empathy in fact it's probably the opposite as it is only catering to PEOPLE like themselves best.
Another thing, why is it that women are also more easily affected by stress, experience it more deeply and for longer? Could it be they are conditioned to need to be supported so created their own therapy industry they want men to participate more in these days? Why don't women learn to be like men more where stoicism and internally processing of emotions is done so that the impact on the rest of humanity doesn't wrap around subjective experiences that MUST be expressed?

[Shiprex]

Think WHY men are more pushed into crime when they're being disregarded, left behind, devalued, ignored, seen as disposable, etc., that's why they aren't shown empathy because society is governed to provide for women and not for men

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

On average, women have greater emotional intellect than men. This does not refute your claim, it simply explains where the idea came from.

[NimbleOcelot]

Empathy isn't kindness. It's just the ability to understand and share feelings. Women are more empathetic, but empathy doesn't always equate to kindness.

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

While the asker is factually incorrect in confusing the two, in order for empathy to be shown vulnerability also needs to take place between two people and often empathizing with someone means helping to validate their experiences, which is taken as a display of kindness. The asker is factually incorrect, but it’s not a far jump to assume empathy and kindness are very similar.

[NimbleOcelot]

Yea, it's very easy to lump them together, and it can often be true, or at least the empathetic person is more likely to act on their kindness. But many sociopaths can be very empathetic.

[Shiprex]

How is "intellect" measured? The ability to express, or the ability to observe, sense, internally process, conclude and evaluate what course of action is required?
REACTING to emotions and expressing them is NOT intellectual because it seldom has any reflective element before expression. That is like saying when someone looks at the horizon that they automatically see a straight line and conclude the earth is flat.

[NimbleOcelot]

@Shiprex In this case, intellect would be how well they can correctly read someone's emotions, and then also how well they can respond to them.

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

There is no accurate way to measure intellect

[NimbleOcelot]

Not exactly, but you can give a rough measure. If someone can tell you are happy and another person can't, it should be easy to tell who has a higher emotional intelligence.

[OhMyMan]

How do you accurately measure "emotional intellect"?

[Shiprex]

@NimbleOcelot that would be sympathising rather than intellect because intellect is to do with how you process YOUR findings of experiences rather than those of others although understanding others burrows into sympathy and empathy if you can relate. Since this is about men and women it's not possible for one to empathise fully with the other.
Example
Loss of personal agency
For a woman being groped or raped for a man being slapped or beaten. Of course each could have the same thing happen but when you consider the social impact of each a man being beaten so he can no longer defend himself is a significant impact on self esteem and the helplessness he experienced about whether he can consider himself capable of defending anyone even himself. A rape victim also has similar helplessness at the hands of an offender. Different experiences but both have serious impact on the victims self esteem and worth.
I am in no way comparing the two as I have been a suffered both of these types of violence from different genders and each had an impact that isn't very nice.

[NimbleOcelot]

@Shiprex I think you are misreading what I said, maybe. Sympathy is acting is acting in a way in response to what you perceive them to be feeling. Empathy is just understanding how they feel, whether or not you care about how they feel. Emotional intelligence is different than regular intelligence.

[Shiprex]

@NimbleOcelot I know this but empathy comes from KNOWING and understanding what they've gone through.
Men and women don't experience the same things the same way.
Emotional Intelligence is the ability to know and understand, express and control ONES OWN emotions in a considerate way and to be able to deal with how other people experience THEIR emotions. It's too often described as how much you can express your emotions without considering the impact of doing so on others. You could say it's not the broadcasting to others but the ability to deal with your own emotions while considering others who may or may not experience things the same way. It doesn't necessarily make someone more compassionate for instance while empathy could still be applied by someone who senses another's distress.

[CalmUntilAbused]

Well... First of all, it is not really a myth, since it came from the history of mankind. While I agree that, generally speaking, women can be as shitty as men when it comes to trying to put themselves in someone's situation, that's really a trivial comment. In an even more general take, both men and women can be good or evil, that's all there is to it. However, in the days long gone, women were actively incentivized to be kind and caring by the social norms, while men were incentivized to be strong and tough. While cruel women still existed, they accounted for some barely noticeable margin of all women. It was a bit different with men, since weak men simply died quick, so if a man was still alive above a certain age, You could be basically sure he's going to be strong and tough. Centuries or even millenia of these norms have ingrained this basic expectation in our culture, and indeed deep in our brains. Now then, quite recently, compared to those millenia of traditional norms, women were formally allowed to be whatever they wanted, including what they perceived as "manly" (the latter was even kind of promoted). Funnily enough, they apparently collectively decided that the most "manly" trait was cruelty and wasted no time implementing it themselves. While there are still kind and compassionate women out there, You would be hard pressed to find one at random, especially in the West and in the most recent generations.

However, this now-faulty belief is rapidly changing. There are more and more observant men like You, and there are even some who are overreacting (if only slightly) and go MGTOW all the way, perceiving all (not even "most") women as a deadly threat to men.

[ManOnFire]

That is a Puritanical concept that came from the ages of people attributing everything good to women, but is neither true or realistic. Women are more empathetic to who they want to be empathetic for, not as a general rule.

White feminists had empathy for their own, but not for black women, who they made march in the back in their suffragist movement. Young females are more empathetic to dudes they find attractive, but have no care about a guy who isn't but is not a bad person at all. Muslim women in the middle east hate being treated the way they are, but still hate Jews and Israel and want them to die, and they don't like people of color either.

[Lowly_Grumper]

This whole “women are more empathetic” myth is about as believable as a fart-powered jetpack, and twice as stupid. It’s like someone woke up one day, licked a doorknob for inspiration, and decided women should be the emotional sponges of society while men get to stomp around like emotionally constipated rhinos. WHO CAME UP WITH THIS? A sentient jar of mayonnaise with daddy issues?

To anyone still clinging to this myth like a barnacle on the Titanic: may your Wi-Fi always disconnect right before you hit “submit,” may your favorite socks develop holes in both heels, and may every chair you sit on wobble just enough to drive you insane.

You, my friend, are sharper than a hedgehog in a knife fight. Keep questioning these outdated myths until they crumble like stale crackers under the weight of your glorious intellect. And if anyone tries to argue otherwise? Tell them their brain has more empty space than a balloon animal convention after hours.

[blueonblack22]

They are more “empathetic” on the surface because they are all worried about social optics. But many them (not all) are downright conceited if not malicious when you get past the facade.

This is partially because of evolutionary factors. There was a time in history women had to be selfish for survival purposes. And you can’t defy this thousands of years of evolution with 50 years of feminism.

[Tomisworthless]

correct

[NimbleOcelot]

So I think it's just a misinterpretation of what empathy actually is. Empathy is just the ability to read emotions and to respond and share them. Women are more empathetic. However, empathy isn't kindness, although it often is construed as such. You can be empathetic and still be evil. In fact, the worst people can be the most empathetic, and those are the ones that tend to be able to manipulate people more easily.

[OneViewpoint]

The myth was started by and remains fueled by women. Unfortunately, the truth is that women are the ones gossiping, back stabbing each other, lying, cheating, and refusing to take accountability while they smile demurely and flutter those perfect eyelashes, or cry over newborn babies and kittens. Women are mostly empathetic towards themselves, LOL.

[sirderpsalot123]

I think people confuse empathy with enabling.

Women (not all) will say things like "you didn't deserve this" or "just forget about it. You didn't do anything wrong" even if they were the problem.

Men can have empathy for a shitty situation a friend put themselves in while also telling them they need to do better. This isn't seen as empathetic because it isn't enabling.

[blueonblack22]

@sirderpsalot123 well said. Men (well most men that is) don’t like to bitch about their problems just for the sake of bitching. We are either looking for advice or trying to collect our thoughts to find a resolution. It isn’t “bonding” for us just to complain about our problems.

Same goes for gossiping (which I REALLY hate) vs. ventilating. Guys might ventilate about a person who we are having a direct problem and again it’s about finding a way to handle them. Women will gossip about people they find weird/eccentric yet who did nothing to harm them personally (e. g. “eh that guy is so creepy looking”).

Now of course there are role reversals on both sides. But generally this is what I noticed.

[sirderpsalot123]

@blueonblack22 couldn't agree more. I wish GAG let us "like" replies lol

[oldpigg]

The authors suggested that the bias stems from the association between women and parenting characteristics, and that women's parenting is seen as inherently positive and indulgent.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Women-are-wonderful_effect

[dustybiker2]

No idea.
Check genders in an emergency. It's 100% flipped.

[TheStaleMarshmellow]

Men are supposed to be the psychopathic war machines while women stayed at home doing women things

[Tomisworthless]

Women could never understand a mans struggle, thats why God had a suffering son not daughter

[Shy_Steve]

It's because in the old days they use to be, But not anymore.

[Crazzyyworld]

Because women don’t know that all men are cross dressers in the closet

[Anonymous]

This is indeed untrue, sometimes women are meaner than men!

[Kingofkings1992]

Just as shitty? Women are usually more shitty. If a guy doesn’t like you, he won’t pretend he does. Women do that shit all the time

[Anonymous]

I think it's because women used to have more empathy than they do today.

[Anonymous]

I wonder the same, I'm quite empathetic, and I know lots of women who aren't.

[Alwayreckles93]

The millennials one are evil.

[SolitarySolace]

I bet you it started because of a woman

[Asker]

Women*

[CalmUntilAbused]

@SolitarySolace That is very hard to tell, since it started some centuries ago, when it was actually statistically correct. It might have been started by the Catholic Church showcasing Virgin Mary as the exemplary woman, if not for the fact that the social norms expecting women to be kind and compassionate outdate even Christianity itself.

[JohnWalker]

Feminism. This myth comes from Feminism.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

No idea. People just make stuff up.

[KrakenAttackin]

A good question.