How to take a step back from my best friend?

[Anonymous]

(HerF25 & meF26) We’ve been friend for at least 7yrs now. The past few years she’s done some questionable things. They all have to do with waiting for me/ waiting for her. Many many many times she asked me to hang at like at ex: 7:30pm. She won’t even show up until 8:30pm. No text saying she’s running late nothing. Or we’ll meet up at a place and she’ll make me wait there for an hr. She also doesn’t wait for me. One time she pulled in my driveway to pick me up for a last min hang and couldn’t even wait 2min before pulling away. We’ve had many conversations about this and how I feel disrespected when she makes me wait more than 15min. She clearly isn’t gonna change and I don’t wanna continue waiting for her especially an hr. I love her and want to be friends but not if I keep being disrespected like this. I don’t think I’m asking much for her to stick to a time line/ her word. Do I end the friendship? Do I have ANOTHER convo about how I feel or do I just slowly pull away? Any advice is helpful. Thank you in advanced🫶🏻

[SteveSmith1985]

This is a hard one. Whether one more conversation is likely to work... you know better than me.

What I would suggest, is to have one more conversastion, that is essentially an ultimatum. You can even read her exactly what you wrote here. The idea is to make this the "I am going to have to end this friendship, if you can't change your behavior."

That way, you do give her one final chance before ending things. She gets one last chance to actually change things otherwise she knows your friendship is over.

I don't think you're asking too much. Whether or not its worth ending a friendship over depends entirely on how much it bothers you. Just make sure you're actually wanting/willing to do that, before you give her an ultimatum.

I think that's the way to go for this situation.


🙂