I talked behind my ex-friend’s back and she slapped me—how do I apologize now?

[munsonsie]

I made a huge mistake and don't know how to deal with it. I took karate for 5 years and Im goinginto junior year at University. I had a bestie (sort of) at the beginning college. As time went on, tbh, jealousy started setting in. she's sort of the blonde Barbie type, gets a lot of attention. We drifted apart and I started talking behind her back. We recently got into a confrontation. She knows about my having taken karate. We had a confrontation last weekend. After verbally going back and forth, I moved forwards towards her and she backed up, looking behind her. She looked unsure, a little worried. But she backed against a railing and couldnt back up any further. She changed her disposition and off handedly said “Awgh, I never believed any of that karate crap anyway. I easily got every fuckboy and you're no different. She smirked. She'd had her right arm dangling down and all of it a sudden it flung to the outside. A slap. But she was way too fast for me smh. Her right smack came all the way around and slapped the crap out of me fast! I was shocked as my face spun but a second later the sting set in and I yelled OWWW! She just smirked at me as I cringed and went uggh! I never thought that could happen to me tbh. She was right. But now Im completely humiliated and frustrated. Should I apologize to her? If so, say what exactly?

Updates

22 h

Anyone besides anonymous angry people permeate this site?🤨

[Nikki1989]

You talked behind her back. That's the root cause, and your apology needs to own it fully, without minimising or deflecting ("but other people were saying it too"). The slap was her reaction to feeling betrayed, and while it wasn't the right response, starting your genuine apology by referencing her behaviour will derail the whole thing.

[munsonsie]

Sighs, I was afraid of that tbh. I was just so shocked how it changed in 2 seconds from her looking worried and backing up, to her just going😏😏and me ending up slapped like that.😒But I guess you're right.

[SueShe]

If anyone should apologize, then she should for being abusive and physically assaulting you.

Obviously, you did not act properly when you talked behind her back, even if she upset you in a way or another. You should have de-escalated the situation and not have become aggressive with her by marching towards her menacing.

Her reaction was the one of a person that had no other option but to trick you and she obviously succeeded in doing it.

My best guess is that now, your friendship is definitely over and out but you should certainly not apologize or if you do, ask for one apology in return for her being physically abusive.