So tonight, I had this guy come up to me and wouldn't stop talking at the bar. He seemed REALLY eager to be my friend. In a really weird, awkward way, like it was his mission or something. All I can do is be nice, especially as a male, cause he seemed half nervous, half eager. It really was like a guy hitting on a woman at a bar. If he wouldn't stop talking about his wife and kids, I would've assumed he was gay.
He spent like half an hour with me, and was super eager I do things with him, like talk about the town with him, and talk sports (which I actually don't like), and play two games of electronic darts (and also do shots with him, which I declined). He was also an older white guy; like 40-something and married.
I could tell he was a nice guy, but it really did cross the line between being nice and trying to "make a new black friend", and being overly pushy to where I just wanted him to go the hell away. He must've asked me ten times if I had any questions about anything. He didn't even seem drunk and didn't smell of alcohol. He really got annoying when he kept wanting me to do things a certain way "because that's how we do things here in [this town]". If I wasn't nice, I really would've told him off. I think he just has pet peeves and kept forgetting that we aren't friends and I don't know him, and he came up to me to start talking, and wouldn't just go the f*ck away, so he eventually apologized (kinda sorta).
The thing is, I'm introverted and was only there at the bar because it was my friend's birthday and she was celebrating. I'm also about to move next week as well, so it's my last week in town. Any attempts to make things work between us failed, however. I really felt like a woman being hit on by a guy who wouldn't take no for an answer, and I'm a dude who's also taller than him (although I'm not tall at all; he's just short).
It was just awkward and uncomfortable for me, especially since I must've made a woman feel this way at least once in my life, if not more. However, I've NEVER been this bad and lacking awareness. He was just so damn aggressive and pushy. And he kept talking about himself and I couldn't f*cking care LESS! I didn't want to be rude to get him to leave, and didn't want to tell him, "I'm good, now leave me alone" cause I can tell he doesn't talk to people much, cause his social skills are awful.
As I said, this was half an hour this guy was with me. And him being a married man trying to make a Black friend, made things even more awkward. I'm really not afraid to get rude, but I can tell he was trying his best, as super f*cking annoying as he was!
It really did make me empathize with women tonight. When a pushy guy with no game starts talking to them and you're too nice, and too sympathetic to tell him to please go away. I just wonder if there was a better way this could've been handled, though. I gave hints I wasn't really trying to chat with him, and barely responded to anything other than one-word responses and disingenuous head nods. Again, I feel sorry for every woman who has to deal with pushy guys like this at the bar or club. And what's worse is, I can KINDA understand his side as well, despite me never being that aggressive before. It was just an awkward uncomfortable situation and I'd have rather been left alone.