User @NicoletteXO wrote a nice MyTake called How To Get A Woman If You Are An Incel . I wrote a response, but it was so long, I ended up just making it a MyTake myself. No, this isn't necessarily about MGTOW. I'm not saying MGTOW is bad, but most men can't do it (me included). It's also kind of defeatist and I personally believe the love of a truly good woman is worth more than abandoning all hope of ever having a woman, even if the latter is far more logical and likely nowadays. I guess you could say I tipped my toe into the MGTOW pool. I still won't ever get married, but I'm not giving up all hope on ever having a female partner, even though it's the strongest likelihood (given my short, ugly, overly-opinionated ass). But you should read NicoletteXO's MyTake first before reading this one. Anyway, here's the MyTake.
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It's nice to see a woman actually trying to help incels, instead of crapping all over men who are already beaten down and at their worst. However, I don't think the only way to cure incels is by getting them a woman, though. Most incels are the way they are because absolutely NO ONE loves them, especially women, and they completely lack height, looks, money, etc, to get women to like them. (One could argue developing social skills might help, but social skills mean f*ck-all when you're already unattractive; women will have already made up their minds based on looks alone and charisma can only work for men who are at least a 6 out of 10.) I think the wrong message is to tell incels they need to get a woman to be "cured."
The bigger, better message (one women tend to hate because it's not about them and they get nothing out of it) is teaching incels they don't need women to be happy in life and can get love from other means. Yes, sometimes this means MGTOW (although I don't recommend it; it's harder than it looks and only a few men are disciplined enough to go cold turkey off of half of the entire human species.) Other times though, this means just purging your sadness and rejection out of you through one big cry session. Yes, we're taught that "men don't cry" but sometimes, a person has to just let it out. Not too often, though. Once a man can finally purge themselves of the rejection of no woman ever loving him due to his genetics in life, and doubled-down by his depression due to said genetics, he can finally move on to start working on himself. Getting new hobbies, learning new skills, making more money at work, and gaining TRUE happiness and confidence.
Telling an incel how to get a woman is like telling a drug addict how to get drugs after they've been outlawed. It doesn't fix the problem. Especially since you didn't address the biggest issue they have; a lack of self-esteem. We all know just about every (straight) woman on the planet loves 'confidence' in men, above all else. And I didn't see that mentioned once, here. Even if he can protect a woman and be her "provider" (which honestly, makes women look very selfish and narcissistic; like what are they giving back to the man?), a woman won't stay with a man who doesn't have high self-esteem. You're setting them up for failure.
That's why I said incels truly need to develop self-esteem first, above all else. I think therapy and support groups are good for that, but the best solutions are things like gaining new friends, getting a dog, going to the gym and seeing results from it, and other forms of self-improvement towards their mental and physical well-being. THAT is how you cure an incel. Give him something to be proud of in life, instead of a woman. Give him self-esteem and self-worth.
Just know however that these things DON'T come easy and don't come quickly. You need to build confidence one small feat at a time. It's like trying to create a mountain one tablespoon of dirt at a time. To build true inner confidence, you need to build a resume of lifetime feats and accomplishments. Think of it like an RPG video game. You're at level 1 or 5? You need to be like at level 60 before you're strong enough to catch a woman's heart and have her join your party. Otherwise, you're not ready yet, rookie.
The problem is, our society is currently sh*tting on men, left and right, while raising up incompetent women (the competent women see right through this scam of feminism, wokeness, OnlyFans sh*ttiness, and entitlement). It's all part of a bigger goals to weaken and dismantle society, starting from the strongest majority (masculine men) and working their way down. That's why victim-complex women and minorities are propped up if they can be used as pawns, and turned on if they don't drink the Kool Aid like the rest of their peers. It's ironic though that the only weak-minded people they don't try to prey upon and exploit nowadays are the single, lonely men, aka "incels." Jordan Peterson may have shepherded in these lost lambs (whether through genuine good intentions or to exploit them himself, is up to you), but the mainstream elitists haven't.
But be grateful though. It means you have the strength and power in you that those that would seek to exploit you, bad women, woke corporations, politicians, etc, can't see. You don't have to be just another sheep being sold lies and BS. You don't have to be another pathetic simp pretending to buy a woman's love, respect, and validation through Twitch.com donations or OnlyFans subscriptions. You can be the "zero to hero" role model of your own life! You can be the phoenix that rose from the ashes that everyone dismissed or took as a non-threat. But YOU must make that decision. YOU must put down the bong, get off the drugs, stop the porn addiction, and decide to be a better person and become your own role model from the future.
It's hard to be a man, nowadays. And only VERY stupid or fortunate people think otherwise. Not saying it's not hard to be a certain type of woman nowadays either. Society has always been hard on the people not "chosen" by the elites and royalty in society. The free-thinkers. The independent minded. While women certainly get propped up nowadays, that only applies to the dumbest and most useless women in society. Truly smart intelligent women don't fall for feminism propaganda and no useful, smart, intelligent woman on this planet is a feminist. Feminism is a cult for the stupid and useless, just like wokeness is, in general. If they don't want you, be grateful. It means they see you as a threat. They see you as too hard to exploit or control. And guess what? They're probably right. Prove them right. Be the man you always wished you could be. Just know; it'll take at least 5 to 10 years to get there. But nothing worth having comes easy. You DON'T have to be "an incel" for the rest of your life. For as sh*tty as this world is becoming, there's still a lot of it left to enjoy out there. And you can do so with a partner, and definitely without a partner.
Don't try to get a woman if you're an incel. Try to stop chasing a woman and stop being an incel, altogether. 20 year old me was never an "incel," (I never hated all women or blamed my lack of success on women themselves) but I was pretty damn close. I eventually learned that what we think we want, is an illusion. A fantasy. That woman who's a 10.10 that'll make you breakfast in bed and rub your feet and make you feel like a man's man, pretty much doesn't exist. And for the few that do; only the genetically gifted and super-confident men are getting them.
So stop chasing a fantasy or being depressed or sad over a figment of your imagination. Real people - men and especially women - are FLAWED. They are often annoying and troublesome. Endure through the pain and realize that you're better off being an independent man, than being a temporarily happy slave. Maybe go MGTOW; maybe don't. But whatever you decide in life, do it for YOU and YOUR OWN SANITY AND HAPPINESS. If you end up getting a woman at the end and she's actually a high quality woman, then good for you. Otherwise, start learning to live the best f*cking life possible without a woman in it. Future you ten years from now will thank you.
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