How To Not Get Carried Away...

[bitesizedonut]

Guys, I know this may come as a shock - but as a woman I can be very emotional. Now, I know it isn't logical, but sometimes I get swept away by the tidal waves of emotion. How can I help myself rationalize through them. Is there a way to turn them off - if only for a second - to reason with myself?

I don't think I struggle with this as much as some women, but it is a problem for me still and I really would like to get to a point where it happens on a very rare occasion. Opinions/advice from guys and girls welcome :D

[Binary_Illusion]

Emotions, the one thing that will lend women endearing and eternal love, or lead them to murder!

With such strong and fluctuating emotions, what can you do?

I know of one thing that does help, but it can be very dangerous, and will become harder to come back the more you use it. Kind of like the movie Click, if you have ever seen that. It's called disassociating. Instead of thinking your the person dealing with the problem at hand, think that your a person watching a movie. Your an observer of what is happening, nothing more. You have no emotional ties, because it's not your life, your watching another person. When emotions are out of the way, you can think clearly.

DO NOT abuse this, because you WILL become emotionless. The more you disassociate, the harder it is to come back and feel things again. Emotions are good, it's just good to block them out from time to time. Like in a big deal, businessmen use this tactic to make the best decision.

Also, you should be confident in yourself. When you are confident and don't second guess yourself, you tend to make the best decisions.

Another thing I should note is, when you start thinking of all the things that will go wrong(in your mind), think of the possibility, and probability of those happening. You'll see that they won't probably happen, they are outlandish possibilities.

And lastly. You should have a release. Someone that you can talk to to get the emotions out. So they don't build up, so you don't bottle them up and blow up.

Best of luck :))

[bitesizedonut]

I think it's that release that I am missing lol. That is the missing link.

[Snorkledorf]

Not much advice, but in a way I sort of know what you mean. As a guy, I (sometimes) wish I wasn't intensely distracted by waves of physical arousal triggered by every third woman I pass on the street. I'd love to be able to throttle that down. I assumed it would cool down as time went on, but...nothing yet. Different direction, but similar problem?

It's not only women that are slaves to their hormones...

[bitesizedonut]

:) I like your answer for some reason. Maybe because it seems like it is a more equal outlook :D

[jrose]

All right, I know we women are criticisized, teased, and all other manner of things for being too emotional at times. And I know I'll probably get messaged by guys complaining about me playing this card, but I'll say it anyway: at certain times of the month (usually about a week before my period) I find my emotions are much closer to the surface and harder to control. I cry more easily and I have a fuse about a centimeter long when usually I'm pretty even-tempered. One thing can set me off and I find myself irrationally angry and making a bigger deal out of it than I know I should- I KNOW it's irrational but I can't help it. My solution- I try to count to ten, take some chill time by myself during these times.If I find myself getting emotional with someone- I just try to pull back from the situation a little, and get out as soon as possible. If your problem is like mine (hormonal) then you can't really do much but learn to live with it and don't worry about it so much- men get carried away too, they just don't have an entire societal history judging them for it lol.

[bitesizedonut]

Lol sadly... I think it may be - this problem comes up every month rofl. *sigh* I guess all we can do is our best, right?

[Cool-Relax]

Maybe I'm weird for a girl, but I'm not all that emotional. I have my moments, but I'm very good about catching myself. It's really just about being able to stop yourself and reflect on whether or not you're handling a situation rationally. We can all sense when we're getting emotional. When that happens, you need to take a moment to evaluate things. Is it worth it to get angry, upset, etc.? Would it be better to approach things more calmly? What's really causing the emotions (e.g. something else is stressing you out, and you need an outlet)? The situation doesn't go away after thinking about it, but you can handle it better once you've taken the time to think it over.

[bitesizedonut]

I don't get so snappy as I just get emotional. Everything is the end of the world and nothing can go right. I'm more likely to cry than lash out. That's just me. I take things to personally when I'm like that as well. I'll try to at least keep it together enough to walk away from the situation and cool down next time :)

[Cool-Relax]

The idea still stands lol. When I get emotional, I'm the same way. It's like the world is going to end, then it hits me that I'm being just a tad bit too dramatic.

[bitesizedonut]

Lol - I need that snap back to reality. Maybe I can learn to kick my butt back in it when I'm walkin' into drama land. :D

[click11]

it's hard to do without ridding ur self of all emtion completly. (i'm kinda like a stoic jerk now so I could probably tell you how to avoid a situatuion, but I wouldn't know how keep it balanced.

anyway I guess just right when you feel yourself getting that tidal wave of emotion (you can see it coming) hold ur breathecoutn to 2 or 3 in ur head just to slow it down. and then if you made the realization that ur getting to carried away with ur emotion ur bound to be able to stop and think about what your going to do.

( I hope that helps)

[sammiecandie]

been thru a lot of that. over 10 guys left me bcos of that. lol now I'm with an amazing guy he's thought me how to get out of the 'delusion' that actually strongly mindfcks me. just remember that THOUGHTS create EMOTIONS. I tried diff ways to get me out of this. one of them is by denying my emotions. well yeah it helped but when it came back to it oh boy it was so bad I had to turn to drugs. so what I learnt is that to get over this problem the only way is to understand ur thoughts and ur emotions. talk to yourself. rationalize it yourself. ask yourself why and what ifs and what you can do about it. try not to depend on others. its not easy to be emotionally independent but once ur there, you feel SO good. you feel happy without even having happy things to happen to u.

[Littletad]

Your question is confusing. Are you asking how to harbor your emotions? Prevent them from being said? The fact is, people deal. If they don't, they only become more and more frustrated with themselves. People need closure, they need to deal, and they need actions. Not blaming yourself for being emotional, simply because your "the girl".