So there is a girl I've really hit it off with at work, but I can't really get a feel for how interested she actually is in me. First off, she just broke up with her ex, who is out of state, a few nights ago so I know that she probably isn't over him yet. However, she has been flirting a lot more with me at work like playful poking and bantering, and neck massages. She has also asked my friend at work about me which he told me is a definite sign that she is interested in me and that I should hang out more with her just as friends at first of course.
So the other night I got up the courage, as she was tipping out since we are servers, to ask her if she would like to hang out with me sometime before she leaves back to her hometown for a week for the 4th of July. She said "You can hang out with me now" which was a whole measly 5 minutes while she counted out her tips since she had plans to go see a movie with the same friend of ours at work that night who she has been asking questions too about me, which I know they are strictly just friends because he has a girlfriend and he knows I like her. Then she said she had to work the next night and she was going to go get hammered after work. Then she said she has to work a double shift on Wednesday and pack since she was leaving early Thursday morning. I thought she was interested in me, but now I can't tell if that was just a nice way of rejecting me, is she playing hard to get, was it bad timing, or what I have no clue?
If any ladies can give me an idea on what is going on and if I should even try pursuing her anymore when she gets back, I would really appreciate it. I also am taking into account the whole "rebound guy" thing also since she just broke up in the past week and I really don't want to be that either. Thanks for any input ladies.
So the other night I got up the courage, as she was tipping out since we are servers, to ask her if she would like to hang out with me sometime before she leaves back to her hometown for a week for the 4th of July. She said "You can hang out with me now" which was a whole measly 5 minutes while she counted out her tips since she had plans to go see a movie with the same friend of ours at work that night who she has been asking questions too about me, which I know they are strictly just friends because he has a girlfriend and he knows I like her. Then she said she had to work the next night and she was going to go get hammered after work. Then she said she has to work a double shift on Wednesday and pack since she was leaving early Thursday morning. I thought she was interested in me, but now I can't tell if that was just a nice way of rejecting me, is she playing hard to get, was it bad timing, or what I have no clue?
If any ladies can give me an idea on what is going on and if I should even try pursuing her anymore when she gets back, I would really appreciate it. I also am taking into account the whole "rebound guy" thing also since she just broke up in the past week and I really don't want to be that either. Thanks for any input ladies.
Updates
+1 y
Ok seriously why have I only gotten responses from guys on this issue so far? I would really like some ladies input. Thanks.
Updates
+1 y
I'm going to ask her if she wants to go to the Aquarium or something like that a few days after she gets back from her trip. I also found out some other info from sources/friends at work, so I'm fairly confident now to keep pursuing her when she gets bak
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
3Opinion
It means she's a busy woman; she's got a lot going on as most girls do. I agree with the last guy who posted, you should have had a more assertive approach to asking her to hang out. The way you asked allows her to put you on the back burner, and the way her schedule currently is, you will stay there. This is because it doesn't look like your ready to do anything with her yet, you are still trying to figure out if she wants to be with you when she is clearly flirting with you. You my have shot yourself in the foot on this one, or you may still be in the clear, all you can do is wait and see if she is still flirting with you. If she is then its go time, tell her to meet you somewhere for coffee or dinner or wherever you want to take her. If she isn't flirting with you still, learn from your mistakes and move on.
Hah, this is actually quite funny because I posted this same question on another forum site and all the women that have replied tell me not to rush into things with this girl as she is probably enjoying her new found freedom and not to be a "boa constrictor." Really the only reason I did make a move is because my friend says right after a break up is the perfect time too, but I don't want to be the rebound guy, however this girl is extremely hot and I don't want to be too late either.
Did you post the flirting that she's engaging in? In my opinion that's a little much for newfound freedom. They are right but in this case you are barely "constricting" at all, that might be a slight problem. As the old song goes, "Hold on loosely, but don't let go", you have to be holding on to her to some extent or she's gonna slip away. Keep your head up, and if she comes back and is flirting with u, make your move. Good luck, though you probably won't need it.
You had this fish on the line and you blew it, oh man. Good points she was tickling you give massages, which were good, but then you said this do you want to hang out with me sometime? You let second herself man. This what you should have said, hey are you free friday night? Wait for response which is usually yes or I don't know why, and they you say good friday night 7 o clock be ready I am taking you out to dinner. And then you leave it at that, don't stick around and chit chat be like hey I got to go do some stuff but you better be ready at 7 o clock cause I am coming to pick you up. She can either say no which would imply she doesn't like you or ok, see you at seven.
If only life were that easy man. There is no "yes" or "no" answer. And first off, she did bounce right after I asked her and she does actually work the next few nights so those weren't excuses. So I'm either thinking it was a mixture of bad timing and she is being cautious since she just broke up with her ex. I'll try again when she gets back if she keeps giving me neck massages and flirting with me some more.
Yes there a yes and no answer the key is tell her, if she knows you want to and she knows that your in control, not afraid, then man chances are she will go on a date with you. Most girls that I have been with I have said be ready at this time I am picking you up and they were, they like that if you know what your doing, don't ask just tell her hey we are doing this at this time.
Thanks for asking this question! I have been in a very, very similar situation! I too would love to hear the answers on this! Good luck bros!
Be the first girl to share an opinion
and earn 3 more Xper points!