Can effeminate men be good lovers?

I started talking to/flirting with effeminate man recently. On first look, he seems like any other guy (he dresses normally, manly). But the way he talks and his movements are kind of feminine and at first I thought he was gay. But it turned out he's as straight as line and that he's actually very popular with the ladies. Well, I am VERY picky, and he managed to catch my interest, so I get why other women are into him as well. There's something really sexy about him, besides that he is cute. I don't really know much about him but yet, we're just getting to know each other. It seems like he is really interested in me, I can feel some sexual tension between us. And I can't stop wondering what he's like in bed. :)

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Most Helpful Guys

  • It sounds like he's generated a genuine connection with you and an air of mystery and intrigue around his sexuality... So I think he's got at least 70% of the "good lover" title won already with you. All he really has to do is carry that into the bedroom and I'd say you'd find him a good lover. If he happens to be creative and different in any way it's only going to excite you more. The only way this could all break down is if he drops the connection with you completely along with the clothing, I'd say.

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  • Hell yes we are good lovers. There is a good chance this guy will never raise his voice because yelling no matter what makes him angry. He is probably less likely to hit you because he looks down on males hitting women. A man will never hit a woman. He may be sure that you are pleased in bed before he is. Just because a man has a feminine side does not mean he is gay or weak. He is just different and if everyone was the same life would be boring. Give the man a chance. There is a good reason he picked you out of all the others.

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Most Helpful Girls

  • He's popular with the ladies as friend I assume? I doubt it's as crush because I know for an instance that women tend to be drawn to masculinity biologically seen. That's why 'bad guys' and 'gentlemen' are popular. Both are considered very masculine. Especially 'bad guys' who usually possess higher testosterone levels making them standing out (the more of the hormone, the more attractive the guy tends to be)
    I also know that women with higher testosterone levels than the average woman tend to fall for men who have a higher estrogen level than average. If you're one of those women, your relationship with him might work out. You'd be the one dominating.

    I'm personally repulsed by femininity in guys and wouldn't ever consider dating one.

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  • Yes! Effeminate men are much better lovers than masculine men. They have more consideration and caring about them. Unless you just want to be banged hard by a big one, one can have a better relationship with an effeminate male than other mundane men. They also tend to take care of their appearance and hygiene better and are very neat and clean in their living habits. They have wider interests than macho men as well making them more fun to be with and have more intelligent conversations. I happen to have many male friends that take it a step further and fully feminize themselves at times and this is really wonderful. They don't all act effeminate when in male mode, but they carry the balance of male and female in their daily lives. Dive in and discover for yourself.

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What Guys Said 27

  • Tbh I kind of hope he turns your picky ass down, mostly just because you kade a point of trying to show everyone that you have standards lol.

    Yes of course feminine guys can be good lovers. What kind of question even is that? You may as well ask if gay men can have black hair. It's never a guarantee with these things either way, everyone is different and everyone likes different things.

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  • Stop putting things into either effeminate or masculinity categories. That's why there are people struggle with their identity and shit.
    Just accept people as they are without labelling them and just try it out.

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    • I agree with this. I know men who are straight and masculine in personality but rather feminine in behaviour. I'd even say I fall into this group as I'm often assumed gay. I admit I have trait that are seen as commonly gay (liking pink, not minding wearing nail polish or makeup (I don't commonly wear these but would be willing to wear them and I've had people shame me and call me gay just for that), etc) but I don't see how these affect my masculinity or sexuality, if anything I see myself as more masculine for not being shamed into things.

  • Men who are more in touch with their feminine side are in fact significantly better in bed than men who aren't. They have a higher respect for how you feel, and want you to experience the same, if not better sexual pleasure as themselves.

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    • What he said... lol
      Without generalizing or stereotyping, a man who isn't bound by gender conceptions generally is a "thinker" type more than a "doer", so as long as you're not expecting a pro athletic pounding, those types are generally "more inventive" @ finding unexpected passions underneath the surfaces & are open to more exploration of what you like... ;)

  • I don't think he could be. He'd be too much of a pussy to do anything to protect you. It's his actions that determine what he would do in situations. The way he dresses has nothing to do with his actions

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  • Think about the way you guys are flirting. Try to even sext him based on his sexting you will really know if he is what you think he is. If you do decide to sext look fo things like is he touching you a lot is his boy close to you are you guys really kissing dose he take if your cloth. Dose he actually want to be inside you look at his descriptions in his sexting to you than you should really know and not be weary about him being gay.

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  • you know what women want? A man whom woman want...

    what a fking disaster, god damn herd mentality.

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  • You're not really picky, he caught your interest just because he happened to be popular with the ladies.

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  • It Depends on Men. Also Different Men Have Different Concept Of Masculinity. Effeminate is Relative Term

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  • Dont know as im straight the thing about me is my personality is dual fold or two fold meaning im tough to other people especially those who piss me off but im as sensitive as a kitten to the woman i love almost to the point of being p*ssywhipped lol i say sweet adorable things like i wish we could cuddle to her but something i would never say in a million years to a guy or some ugly chick who i have no interest in its more like tough on the outside to everybody else but sweet and soft and delicate as a snowflake or feather to her... if that makes any sense

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  • I don't get why any woman would find that attractive. To each their own I guess.

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  • You can paint stripes on a leopard but it will never become a tiger.

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  • I know a guy like this. He's currently banging one of the tidiest girls in the salsa class

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  • What kind of energy does he emanate? Masculine or feminine? If you dont know much about the energies you woukdnt be able to answer. It sounds like you're just judging his voice and movements superficially. In reality, if he's popular woth the ladies, he must irradiate confidence which is a masculine trait. Also the fact that other women are interested in him makes him more attractive to you. From what you said, it sounds like he does indeed emit a strong masculine energy and thus he would make a good lover for you if your 'frequencies' match. I'm speaking in metaphorical terms by the way, I'm not spouting some pseudoscience bs its just to help you understand easier

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  • Yes. They are attuned to your emotions and are more willing to please you than just themselves.

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  • They are probably a transgender and now you are a lesbian

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  • Yes and effeminate and homosexual are not the same either as many assume.

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  • Yes they can be!

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  • Yes. Can masculine ones?

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    • Lol, sure we can! Not all macho guys are inattentive pricks. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

  • Only one way for you to find out.

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  • Definitely! You will be surprised :)

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What Girls Said 9

  • If you're into that, maybe. I couldn't get with it.

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  • I like a man's man so that probably wouldn't be my type of man necessarily. I dont qant tp have to have the balls or wear the pants all the time in a relationship.

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  • Only one way to find out! Tell us the answer...

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  • I don't know. He sounds tempting.

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  • Of course they can.

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  • Oh yeah

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  • If he is popular among ladies probably...

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  • yes of course

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  • Sure, if you like submissive guys.

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