Is it a bad thing if a guy asks you to pay for your own meal for a date? (Page 2)
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Maybe he can’t afford it but wants to meet you.
Honestly I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that, I’m the type of person who prefers to pay for my own meal though. Just imagine going on a lot of first dates and realising they aren’t for you constantly having to pay for dinner.
Why not just meet for coffee then?
Sorry I wasn’t clear I meant as in for the guy to have to pay for both dinners all the time.
I agree though completely going for coffee is a much better idea for a first date with someone you’ve never met because you don’t have a time limit (waiting for dinner and eating it) and it’s a lot cheaper :-).
My mom believes men should pay too. Whereas I get annoyed whenever the guy I’m talking to now buys my drink when we go out I can get it lol!🙃 I don’t think it’s bad But don’t make it awkward for me either just say split the check... I hate saying separate checks. Unless you got tons of stuff then split it. So far though most guys get offended if you say separate and will just pay for everything... in my experience.
You look like a ray of sunshine and I’m jealous of your tan skin
A guy should pay if I was a girl and a guy asked me out and told me I have to pay that would be the fastest date in the history of dating
Thanks and I don’t tan that’s my skin color but umm thanks
@bklynbadboy1 a guy isn’t obligated to in my opinion I don’t rely on guys I can pay for myself but if you want to fine I won’t argue
I agree he isn't obligated but it's just good manners especially if he ask you out
I suppose
@lovedejj_×o you suppose dont get beat up Dej lol
When the bill on a date arrives, I always suggest to split. However, if he insists on paying, I let him pay, because I don't want to emasculate him. But I do say '"Thank you, next time is on me."
I have no earthly idea. This is what happens when society discards an unspoken rule ("the man always pays on a date") and leaves nothing in its place. Suppose I offer to pay the entire bill and she thinks I'm sexist? Suppose I offer to pay half the bill and she thinks I'm a bum? It's different for every couple now and they just have to figure it out.
For what it's worth, I recommend at least offering to split the bill because it will take a big weight off the guy's shoulders. He might not accept, but he will certainly appreciate your thoughtfulness.
If I were to ask a girl out to dinner or on a date, I would not expect her to pay, I asked her out after all.
I wouldn't mean to be disrespectful, I just wouldn't feel the girl should be out of pocket just because I asked for the pleasure of her company.
He asked you out so he should pay. He sounds super lazy and uninterested in you from the description. If he doesn’t pay now during the first impression phase, it’s only going to go downhill. He’s either a cheapskate, uninterested, a loser with no money, someone who doesn’t try, or has no manners.
Also pay no attention to how he is over text. Some of the best testers make bad boyfriends and vise versa. In person, he sounds like a loser. through text, sounds like a sweet talker. Texting is the lazy mans best tool to put minimal effect with good outcome.
*texters
Imagine down the road if you’re together and you’re laid off, broke, and having a rough patch financially, can you depend on him? Will he help you? Or will he leave you high and dry? I’d bet not.
I believe you both should pay for yourselves especially a first date, you don’t even know you’ll like one another why should one person be forced to pay for someone they barely know? If you both are serious dating then splitting the bill or occasionaly paying for your date is nice but should not be a dealbreaker if they don’t
I will always pay for the first date. However, in general, I believe whoever sets up the first date should pay for it, guy or girl. Whoever sets up the 2nd date should also pay for it. Beyond that it really should not matter, but one person should not ALWAYS be paying for everything.
My opinion on this is that if he asks you out again tell him you dont have the money so he could pay for your meal. you need to teach him to be responsible from day one. I love paying for my gir's bills everytime we go out. another thing, if you think you are doing too much in that relationship you should stop doing that, like be quiet until he initiates the conversation.. You need a relationship, he needs to show you that he needs it too. don't be so desperate.
this is pathetic
@TechnologyNerd how pathetic is it?
I always offer/or pay for the whole meal. Especially if Im the one who made the plans to meet up. Its just the right thing to do. My boyfriend gets super upset when I do this. But I feel I should also contribute.
Well, I think a woman should be ready to pay her own half and at least offer that and not automatically expect that the guy will do it, but a guy asking that on the first date, don't know, sounds cheap of him on top of being shy and not initiating conversations, does not sound like a dependable partner to me but to each their own.
I always just pay for myself.
I mean.. if anything I'd get a little irritated thinking "Why the hell is he assuming I'm not capable of paying for myself?"
But then I have to tell myself that maybe he has to because of his past experiences.. and it's good to be clear. So ya.
Why should the person who put himself out there and risked rejection to ask you on a date also have to pay for everything? There is ZERO justification for that aside from good old fashioned sexism and female entitlement. Should he have to pay for your time or for the privilege of spending an evening with you? That sounds suspiciously like something else.
If I ask a girl out and she doesn't offer to pay her share, she will not be getting a second date with me. If she is offended by me expecting her to pay her share and doesn't want a second date, she has done me a favor by showing her true colors early on so I won't have to waste any more time on her.
It's 2019 for fuck sake. I can't believe we are still debating this topic. Ever heard the someone say women want equality but only when it benefits them? Ever wonder why? You shouldn't...
Whoever is the female who downvoted me, it would be great if you could please explain what you disagreed with in what I wrote.
I feel I'm so weird 😄
I prefer to pay my own bill unless it's "love". When it is dating, means I'm going out but im not in love, i pay for my own bill because i don't want to think "hey some random guy just bought food for me today" its embarrassing. I don't know why.
You're cool.
@Twenty2 really? I lost a Super handsome guy when i did pay the bill. He thought i insulted his manhood 😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄
His loss LoL
@Twenty2 isn't it embarrassing? I have money, i shouldn't be dependent on some stranger's favour
It's cool that you feel that way!
That's normal, and has been normal for a while in no small part to the push for "equality," which has thrown what was left of chivalry out the window.
I wouldn't expect him to pay for your meals unless things actually start getting serious.
Its so difficult nowadays. I would normally pay for the meal, but now not all women want that. It used to mean a lot more when women dated less men, now there are women getting free meals every week.
Its not good or bad, but I know many girls who would be turned off by it
I see it like this :
Who invites pays.
Why? It’s like when someone invites you to their house for dinner.
Do you bring your own food?
You can bring wine or candy but that’s a fraction of the cost.
What if he picks an expensive restaurant that is affordable to him but not to me?
I think whoever invites should pay.
If I’m inviting a guy I’ll pick an affordable restaurant because I can’t afford much.
That sounds great in theory. Except women seldom ask blokes out, which means burden is always on us to pay.
It's not exactly very romantic to insist on you paying for your own meal on a first date, before you've even dated !
If you offer to go 50/50 when you're you're actually on the date fine, but for him to insist beforehand suggests he's not only mean but hasn't got a sense of romance
I suggest you find someone else, there'll be plenty of other guys to find on the dating site who are not so cheapskate
It's great actually, shows that he's not a fake feminist and basically that's healthy behavior. Its ideal. I'd want my date to be a fair , open minded guy
I THINK if i had found the 1, a girl i truley love after 5 or 6months, then i'd pay for her shit,
but i dont think its smart to pay for every girl u dates me, because how many dates do u go on before u find the 1?
20 maybe?
thats 20 dinner meal payfors for nothing?
not smart, so i think girl should pay for her shit if she wants to come along for the date and its both ur first date together