Is it true that men are generally starved for compliments?

Question

SirRexington · Accepted Answer

The reason men are so unsure what to do when a woman is nice to them is because they aren't used to it.
"Not every girl who is nice to you want to go out with you!" Well how are we supposed to know? We usually have women be negative, uninterested or neutral with us. When a girl who isn't a cashier smiles at us, we gey confused because its nit something we ever expect to be told.

We hold on those moments for a long time. It boosts our self esteem. It makes us feel just a little more manly and appreciated and confident than we normally do. Fkr women, the compliments mean nothing. You receive them often. So much so that it might be annoying. But what's annoying for men is feeling worthless, unnoticed and undesirable.

For us, you being nice to us is a big deal. It impacts us. To you girls, it does not. We go home and think about that experience, what it would be like if we continued to converse. What would proceed it. Would we maybe take them to dinner and have a nice time? Who knows. We almost obsess over it because of how good it feels to us emotionally. It gives us a sense of being. Women dont understand or respect this. Men are needy, lonely and desperate for affection. We need women. All those stupid feminists and MGTOW fucks who talk about "women not needin no man" and "I don't need some bitch" are just bitter they are alone and have resorted to sexism and resentment towards the opposite sex. That's what those ideologies are. Angry, hurt and delusional men and women who desperately need the love sbd affection of a good man/woman but who refuse to admit it. Men and women compliment one another in the sense that we need each other. Its how life works. People need to remember that.

Relationships aren't oppressive. They are partnerships of compatible individuals who support and stabilize each other in life for their mutual benefit. Men want a good women to ground them but also to lift them up. We NEED them to. No matter how much "do it yourself, loser" types claim otherwise.

rjroy3 · Accepted Answer

I don't think so, but I really can't say what's the norm. I feel like if you simply match your shoes with your outfit you are bound to get complimented by girls that day. If you have a nice haircut you are bound to get compliments. If you have nice beard genetics and groom it well. You're getting complimented.

If you have nice skin you're getting complimented. If you're funny you're being told you're funny as a compliment. If you're not but a girl likes you she's likely laughing anyways to make you feel good xD

I just think the bar is so low for females to acknowledge you to the point of complimenting you that if you're getting truly zero compliments it is probably because you're not putting any effort into anything. Because there's a lot of shit girls notice, that guys don't give a fuck about but also take relatively no effort. Like if you never get complimented you're either overlooking the compliment you do gets or you're a homeless guy jacking off behind a dumpster barefoot

Anoniemus · Accepted Answer

I think the majority of men do not receive compliments or are hit on to the point that they would not mind being sexually objectified. So I do think they should receive more compliments. Why they don't is anyone's guess (though I have some thoughts). I have no issue telling a man that I like his cologne.

CubsterShura · Accepted Answer

I always encourage ladies to compliment their men more. Men love a good genuine compliment, plus to showed them that someone cares and appreciates what they do. A feeling that guys really lack these days. Many feel like they are worthless and not needed.

coachTanthony · Answer

Give me a couple and I will let you know how I feel!

SuperManiac · Answer

I get them fairly regularly I think, although probably not anywhere near as often as a pretty girl. With that said, I actually don't care for most compliments. I don't hate them or anything like that, but I'm sort of numb to them. What I'm usually trying to analyze is the motive behind the compliment, and what function it is intended to serve.

With that said, sometimes I really appreciate the motive. For example, recently I got some when I was feeling down, and while I cared little about the compliment, I really appreciated the gestures. I felt warm just through the ulterior motives to try to make me feel better, but the compliment itself has no effect on me. I mean if there was a way to say, "OOGA BOOGA!" in a very empathetic way, I'd appreciate it too even if it has no flattering effect at all.

nightdrot · Answer

One thing I don't need to worry about in my life is feeling appreciated. There is not a day that goes by that my girlfriend does not tell me how much she loves me, what a good father I am, and how much she appreciates what I try to do for our family.

That is just her way. It is also uncanny. She seems to know when I need that boost the most and she will just come up and hold me or just gives me that kiss that makes my whole world go round.

Also, we have three small children, and I won't josh you, when they hurt themselves and I kiss the "boo-boo" and make it all better, I feel ten feet tall. You would think I just completed brain surgery.

The funny part being is that somewhere along the way I learned that it is not so much the compliments you get, it is how much you love the people paying you the compliments. That makes all the difference.

razelove · Answer

This question made me a little sad. I've been trying to figure out a few new things for making money on the side and feeling really frustrated. I didn't realize why I liked this job so much. When I do well, or badly they tell me about it. They pay attention. I guess it's more than a little sad. I can't remember the last time I've gotten that kind of attention at home. Last I checked relationships and marriages are bigger investments than jobs. Oh well, I'm a doer, not a thinker. Better to do something about it.

FakeName123 · Answer

Here is what I recommend any women to do at least once in here life:

1. Register an account on a dating website as a guy.
2. Fill it up with an average joe profile and picture. Not bad looking or a failure, but also not Brad Pitt and/or Rockefeller. Just your average dude.
3. Write 20-30 women that seem similary attractive to the guy picture you are using.
4. See results.

This is like an hour or two of work and will grant you a shitton of experience with the difference how men and women get perceived.

the_face_of_god · Answer

I can probably tell you every time it has happen to me. That's how little it occurs with men. Infact, yesterday a random woman who was on the subway as I was on my way to work. She was Cleary into me and complimented my several times about how much she loved my hair. I was so taken aback by it that all I could say was thank you, several times, and went back to listening to my music.

She was moderately attractive and a little older than me. I think she wanted me to chat her up or get a conversation going in that direction, and if it happened in a bar I would have, but on a subway was completely unexpected, and I was unsure how to respond.

Trolloween · Answer

There is a problem with complimenting men in that there are so many men so starved for any female attention they take the slightest thing to mean you want sex or love them. In a bar for example, most girls are hostile to anyone they aren't interested in so won't even talk to a guy they don't want to sleep with or get to know better as a potential date. That's just a polite conversation so imagine how they would react if she said they looked nice?
But I would always get more compliments on my clothes or shoes, maybe hair or called funny than anything else a girl would be told constantly.

Boppy · Answer

Only two strangers have given me compliments on my body. One said I had beautiful eyes, and another said I had a kind face. The first was a scammer selling "charity" gifts, and the second was a woman who genuinely needed money.

I get very few compliments (maybe 10 or so this past year), and physical ones are rarer than personality ones (4. Three from my Mom, 1 from my Aunt).

It would be nice to know that someone like something about me, but compliments are rare usually mean the person wants my money or something. As such, I probably wouldn't believe someone who complimented me unless I had a good reason to trust them.

On the bright side, I have gotten compliments for multiple foods I've baked and for a sweater I like. They shine a lil' warmth on my cold heart. Plus, because they're so rare, they stick out in my memory.

Swat_ · Answer

Men get compliments for the things they put effort and time in. Most girls spend hours on makeup, doing the applying and learning how to use it, ofcourse you would need to compliment something like that. Most men don't put that much effort into anything so they don't get compliments.

I have a couple hobbies in which I've poured hundreds of hours. I've built a community around my work, and now people recognize and compliment me everytime they see me. If you want the same amount of compliments as girls do, you'd need to be in front of the mirror for some extra hours.

Brett99 · Answer

I'm not too fussed tbh. If I were to get "regular" compliments then, from one person would be more than enough. But in truth, I've got enough self-confidence to not be disheartened at all.

In general, I'd say it's a lot more one-way, but it shouldn't be tbh. Then again, guys (again, in general) are "thirstier" it seems, so it makes sense.

Jackblue · Answer

I get some compliments usually from my parents, though I always have trouble believing that they do so for reasons other than the fact that they are my parents. Men especially millennial men do not spend as much time with friends as women do. On the other hand if studies may be believed, women get complimented less at work. I am not sure how you can objectively measure that though.

Ephermerallhama · Answer

Compliments are nice but, they shouldn't be superficial or for something trivial otherwise it would be the same as complimenting a pet for doing something cute. Every person is different so some may not require the positive reinforcement in the form of a compliment while for others it might actually make their day a lot better. Just depends on context and how genuinely it's meant.

Celtero · Answer

I live in the real world so if I see someone complimenting me I start to question their motivation for doing so rather than take the compliment at face value. Rarely will people tell you a good thing about yourself for the sole purpose of informing you.

And I don't need compliments, I know what I do good and what I do bad.

lightbulb27 · Answer

I get complements, and yes I think we like them.
Starved... not sure about that. I suspect a lot of guys feel... demeaned, disconnected, their worth in question?

I've always heard the underlying thing for males is "respect". But it's hard to respect someone who doesn't value themselves. Give such person a complement... and it will be deflected. So in a sense, some would be starved because of their own self image.

MissDawn7961 · Answer

if men want compliments from the women in their lives then men should stop - hitting , beating , raping and trying to make the women in their lives their - slaves - ! treat the women in your life with respect ! for we women do not have to give - no man - un deserved respect or compliments when men are abusive and bullies to their women ! Thanks

The1Guy · Answer

Yes. Men can be controlled by women through the right compliments.

I rarely get them and don't really know how to react when I do. And even am distrusting of some who do it. Perhaps they are trying to manipulate me. That is if they are not sincere.

But I'm lucky that my wife compliments me a lot and it's a treasure to have someone close, who appreciates what I do.

Danny_dan92 · Answer

So are women.

You don’t think all those women that show off their asses and tits aren’t tynna hear flocks of men complimenting them?

PEOPLE like the feeling of being desired by the opposite sex.

So don’t try to make it seem that only men are this way

ZackBan · Answer

Well numbers don't lie, it's seems to be true.
Personally I always thought I was self sufficient emotionally but lately I've discovered that I long for affection a lot more than I thought, compliment are a form of affection so I suppose I'd take any compliment I can get. It might make me sound weak admitting that but it's the truth and a though guy act would make me weaker still.

addlinny · Answer

Starved is probably the wrong word but it is very rare. Guys don't tend to compliment eachother, especially not on looks and I think it's more expected that guys give girls compliments than the other way around.
Receiving a little more would certainly be nice. But too many might feel a little disingenuous.

Lliam · Answer

I don't know, but I love compliments. Who doesn't? I go out of my way compliment people I know all the time just to give them encouragement. And I get my share. But hey, you can't ever get enough. :-) It's a thoughtful thing to do that doesn't cost you anything.

Paul09 · Answer

Compliments can go a long way. I give them out, but rarely get them. Last time a hot friend told me I was cute. I blushed and smiled, thanked her, and that made my day. It was a nice temporary confidence booster. I feel when you rarely yet complimented, you start to wonder why, and might think badly of yourself.

HikerDude · Answer

Yeah, I think that's true. Most guys certainly don't go around complimenting other guys, and most girls don't either, because they think it will make them seem like they're desperate. Even in relationships, most girls won't compliment their bfs because they think it will give him a big (or bigger) head.

fueledbythc · Answer

i get compliments on my work ethic and being nice. its a great confidence booster and i also compliment peoples actions as well.

i never compliment on others looks and i never get complimented on my looks as looks means nothing to me.

Kiran_Yagami · Answer

Yes, but men don't need compliments. We generally settle for not being degraded for doing a good job, but even that is hard to come by. I don't need your pity party or your praise. Just let me do my job and stay out of the way, don't tell me how to do it, and don't bitch when I get it done.

MrOracle · Answer

Men tend to get compliments about what they DO. Very few get compliments on how they look - of course, on average, women consider 80% of men to be "below average" in looks, which is both sad and kind of hilarious.

sweetcocoa_ · Answer

Sometimes I think I compliment my partner a little too much lmao but that's okay because I genuinely mean them. He deserves to know how amazing he is. 🤓

Lynx122 · Answer

It is very true. If someone compliments me I'm usually caught off guard and don't know how to react for a second cause it doesn't happen that often. But I don't really need them I'm fine without them.

Anonymous · Answer

Yeah but who cares were men.
We don't feel right.
And women wouldn't compliment a guy even if she felt compelled to because that might be miscontrued as she's making a pass at him. (he said dripping with sarcasm) i know i ran into that problem repeatedly wirh my grandma everytime she'd tell me i'm hadsome. Easy grandma!

5_AM_Oracle · Answer

I don't think they're starved, because they're used to it. But if you do compliment them, they're gonna feel great that day and they Will remember

zdart · Answer

I think it really depends on the person. Most guys recieve a fair bit of complements. Where this differs from the situation were we are "starved" is that some of us don't recieve many from women. By that I mean someone that we are potentially interested in persuing.

Anonymous · Answer

I tell my girlfriend all the time how spoiled rotten she is when it comes to getting compliments from men. She's considered attractive and men always find a way to talk to her and compliment her. Yet she still finds herself ugly.
I'd say I'm pretty attractive as well (according to my friends and co-workers) and I only get glances and women quickly look away and act like I'm not even there. Yet when that happens I feel like a stud for the rest of the week. lol

Nik1hil · Answer

Pervert  Asshole Dumbass.  Freak And so many compliments echo in my ears, don't really matter cause, it's been 11years since I stopped caring about people's opinions..

genericname85 · Answer

i mean i wouldn't mind to get more xD the compliments i usually get are not really the ones i "want" xD it's just stuff that i already know about myself so it's kind of like whatever. i'd wanna get other sort of compliments.

Ayer93 · Answer

Men definitely get complimented less than women. However attractive guys are complimented a fair bit as well. I think I'm a slightly above average looking guy and I don't think I'm dumb. I've gotten my fair share of compliments in my life.

Cherokeehp · Answer

I don’t think they’re used to it. You compliment a guy once and then suddenly they’re eating out the palm of your hand.

MannMitAntworten · Answer

I receive plenty of compliments over this or that. It's the genuine heart felt ones that stand out and are of the rare variety. Starved for complements? Not remotely.

FictionalCharacter · Answer

Sometimes, at SOME of the guys I compliment. Their ego expands that the conversation goes downhill from there.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

No. What would make you believe such a negative generalization?

coka10 · Answer

I do feel like they are. But I also think that makes it harder to compliment them, because it might be seen as awkward or creepy :(

tartaarsaus · Answer

I rarely ever get complimented on anything, except by my closest friends, especially from women

worldscolide · Answer

Most women I know view compliments as a one way street, all receive and no give. It sucks honestly.

Alice2398 · Answer

I always tell my boyfriend he's beautiful, sweet, sexy, smart and funny. Think it gets on his nerves sometimes and he thinks I'm being a creep

ElissaDido · Answer

I think women care about compliments more than men.

ImagineSketchy · Answer

Typically men don't get compliments often. I'm not sure how often most of us seek out compliments though.

motownplayer2000 · Answer

I can care less about compliments. Actions are so much better than words.

bamesjond0069 · Answer

I was just told by a random girl my eyebrows are really nice. And not long ago i was told i have nice kissable lips. by the way these are the two things i always get complimented on so they must be nice. :D

SomeGuyCalledTom · Answer

I mean, a kind word once in a while wouldn't go amiss...

Levin · Answer

That's why I always ensure that I always get lots of compliments at work.

Titanix · Answer

I hear barely any but the ones I do get are truly genuine, that is much better than a boat load of fake and empty compliments

MackToday · Answer

No a man doesn't get compliments often. We're stoical and deal with what comes, not many men are going to be waiting around for a compliment

Anonymous · Answer

I only get complimented on my work. I would love compliments on my looks, but i probably wouldn't accept them anyway.

Naydyonov · Answer

I almost never get compliments. Nor do I get attention from people. I think I am starting to understand just how much many women don't comprehend just how different our social lives are.

esotericstory · Answer

I dont get much compliments but I'm not really fishing for them either.

ShadowofRegret · Answer

I tend to get a few, and I always appreciate them when they are honest.

dancing_tiger711 · Answer

I think everyone is. As people we tend to overemphasize the bad and bombard people with the negative and only look for what we don’t like about them

adolescentswede · Answer

I dont know what a healthy amount would be, but the only person that regulary compliment me is my mother

Guanfei · Answer

Well, I don't know about the others, but personally I don't get any compliment. Last one was something like 6 months ago and she was just trying to make me buy her stuff.

scooogy · Answer

It's true that the media just need to proclaim a fact like "everyone's talking about it" and no individual reading this could check if that's actually true.

Dargil · Answer

If you satisfy your internal standards, you do not need compliments.

Is it true that men are generally starved for compliments?

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