How do you know when a guy wants just sex or a relationship?

[diamondrose]

It could stem from past experiences or personal traits, but what do you think are indicators?

[MrOracle]

Generally, if a guy wants a relationship with a girl, or is at least considering one with her (he may not know her well enough yet to know if she'd be a good match), his focus is going to be more on the relationship: talking about how she feels about a relationship, discussing compatibility, long-term plans, etc. Sure, sex and attraction will be talked about too, but that won't be the primary focus.

If the guy isn't looking for a relationship at all (with anyone), or if he has already decided that the girl wouldn't be a good match for him for whatever reason, then he's just going to be looking for casual sex with her. And in that case, he's not going to care about compatibility, or long-term anything - he's only interested in getting her into bed, and that's going to be where every conversation ends up. He's not going to care about your religion, whether you want to be married, what your career path might be, what kind of lifestyle you want, whether you are deep in debt, or any of that, because none of it matters when casual sex is the only goal.

I know that some guys are shy or more cryptic or just don't like to talk or whatever, but with MOST guys, they're going to pretty clearly fall into one of the two above groups, and it's going to be pretty obvious which one it is - and, MOST of the time, it's going to be in the second group, because guys are interest in casual sex from FAR more women than they'll want a relationship with. That's why, by default, women should always assume that casual sex is a man's goal, until he proves otherwise. Too many girls assume "relationship interest" by default, which is backwards, and why they get used so often.

[Qdbrown]

Allow him the latitude to show you. If he wants to move too quickly, it's an act. If he sincerely wants to be with you and wait until you're comfortable, more likely real.

Just be advised that there some thirsty men who will stay with a woman longer to get what he wants then leave, or treat you like crap.

[TessCasie]

Guys whether it’s just for sex or relationship always go strong initial phases. You as a girl need to control the phase. Read the whole context about who he is, what’s his personality, what’s his history in relationship. These all things will give signs and clues what he is really looking for. Asking him direct questions won’t help. Just keep talking as a friend and have fun.
if he asks you for sex just straight up tell him we’ll do when comfortable. Control the pace and his emotions you’ll save yourself from heartache.

[Anonymous]

We attract what we want. You should know better what he wants from you. We always know evwn if they dont tell us. We know!! And what are u looking for? It all depends what u looking for and the image u project so they will see u as girlfriend material or just for sex.

[Belgie]

If he's young and male, chances are high that he just wants sex, but there's no way to tell for sure, because a guy who wants sex is capable of doing or saying anything that a guy who wants a relationship will do or say.

There is simply no phrase or behaviour that you can conceive of, that only a guy who wants a relationship will do or say.

[Browneye57]

Sex IS the relationship for the guy, silly. He doesn't need just another friend, he already has plenty of those.

Girls are the keepers of sex.
Guys are the keepers of commitment.
Don't be giving up yours till you get at least a little of his.

Oh, and guys your age are still BOYZ. Their brain doesn't even fully form till about 25. There's just no way they're ready for a wife. PERIOD.

[hahahmm]

1. Because you behave in a way that demonstrates you're good for more than sex.
2. Because you don't settle for guys who focus on sex.

You see... if he believes you're higher quality than the average female he will more likely consider you for a higher quality relationship or you will just move on when he shows himself not to be looking for more than sex.

You sound like you might be into traditional relationships. If so, checkout my MyTakes.

[Starrisunset]

Generally I'd say pay attention to how he treats you. Examples... does he text or talk to you other than when he isn't asking you to come "hang out"... do you guys ever hang out just to spend time together? Depending on how long you've know each other has he ever mentioned you meeting each other's families? Does he ever ask you any personal things about yourself or try to get to know you better?

[BarryLiverstone]

Start with the default: all guys want good sex. (Most girls want sex also)
Guys that want a relationship will make plans to stick around and hang out over time. In order to do that they will get to know you and share their lives to see what you have in common.


Are you asking just in general or do you have a specific guy in mind?

[diamondrose]

I have a specific guy in mind. It’s kinda complicated though. We hit it off but it was right before I moved back home. I moved back to my home town and we continued to talk and text every day. He even drunk called me once and told me that I have the prettiest eyes and smile. But after he called the next morning since he saw we had talked but didn’t remember it, it stopped. Nothing bad happened, and he would still text back after I texted. But it wasn’t like the conversations before. He didn’t reminder mu birthday either. I then talked to a close friend of mine who said his friends disapproved, saying they didn’t want him to “f their friend” (I met him through them) but my friend also said said they were acting weird when telling her. his friends were all into me at separate points but I wasn’t into any of them. I called him and When I asked him he said he stopped simce I moved home and figured we’d pick it back up when I go back to school. We then proceeded to have a 3 hour conversation about other things that he seemed really interested in. So I’m not sure where I stand with him or what to do.

[thotmas97]

I think he just wants sex tbh but I could be wrong

[diamondrose]

@thotmas97 what makes you think that?

[thotmas97]

Because he hits on you when he’s drunk and horny but doesn’t bother to remember things like your birthday. All his friends seem to have the impression that’s all he’s interested in.

[BarryLiverstone]

When do you go back to school?

[diamondrose]

In August

[Overmind]

Perhaps getting to know them first? I would also recommend the zodiac but not that sun sign only B. S. We're talking full natal chart. You particularly want to know what placement their Venus is in. Look for a Venus in Cancer.

[Leavesbound]

Don't have sex with them until you've had a few dates. Most guys who want only sex will give up if they haven't gotten any after 2 or three dates.

[Tiptoetamm]

When they hit you up for sex only, the you know it's a hookup and in my opinion nothin wrong with hooking up safely

[Mamaganja]

If they move slowly, they’re trying to build. If they move too fast, they’re trying to fuck and pass.

[goodvibes4life247]

By there action, for example if all he tries to do is get you in the bed by wanting to be alone in ur bed or his bed, if he want you there late nights. This would be a hit that all he wants is sex

[Dazed0N0Confused]

Men are very open about it, all you have to do is ask.

[Shihab91]

just tell him you want to wait at least 4 months until sex, see if he will stick around

[cjmtherfcker]

This calculation is relative to your perceived value to that man. If you have low value traits, he probably just wants sex and vice versa

[NightHawk99]

You don't. My advice - don't let him between your legs until he proves he can raise a child. Even when he doesn't have any plans to. I do the same with women.

[Shy_Steve]

If he asks to go out with you to like just you 2 then usually he is looking for a relationship, But if he asks you to go with him to parties and gatherings usually then he is using you a bit.

[Anonymous]

There is no guarantee except he wait till marriage. Even if he wait one year, he could cheat on you while waiting for you and leave you after having sex with you finally.

[DWornock]

If he is out of the girl's league, he just wants sex. If she is out of his league, he wants a relationship.

[WhiteWolf69]

I dont know about other guys. Me I would be honest and tell you how much of a relationship I'm looking for. Whether its sex committed friends with benefits or whatever.

[Gray-Wisp]

You tell him that you won't have sex with him before marriage and see if he break sup with you.

[fred_durst]

if he can't wait for at least 10 years for sex , then it is obvious that he just want sex

[anylolone]

Same way to know when a chick just wants sex or wants something more serious.

[InferiorElegy]

How do you know when females just want an ATM machine and free meals?

[Jmmmfi4]

trust me he just wants sex

We only put up with the other crap till you give e us that

[kareka]

Sometime he ask for relation
After sex he find that he dont want relation he want sex only

[msc545]

ask them.

[Anonymous]

What More you want?