Why do men only see me as a woman to be friends with benefits with?

[Anonymous]

Time and time again, with different excuses, men have always found a reason not to be in a relationship with me, hoping that I’ll shrug it off and allow them to have all the benefits of being in a relationship without actually being in one.
Is it just me or do all women get asked to be friends with benefits? What am I doing wrong? Am I not presenting myself as high value enough or do men try this thing no matter how high value you appear?

Some things I have thought about changing:
- refraining from sexual discussion and not entertaining sexual comments/jokes
- not entertaining guys who text back very late
- not being too nice and not saying yes to everything
- not rushing to text back, taking my time
- thinking for a second before I speak and slowing down my speech


Extra detail, optional for read:
The dumbest excuse I’ve heard is the “I’m just not ready” one, this usually comes from guys who have nothing holding them back, they’re my age, we’re similar, we are in the same gatherings, everything would work out for us no doubt. But I’ve heard all kinds of actually very good excuses from age to being friends with an ex of mine to other things.

[FilmGuy93]

A lot of women who struggle to emotionally connect with guys are either meeting them in bad places/social situations to meet commitment-oriented men, or they don't offer the men the things men are actually looking for.

Men want interesting and fun women. You have to have hobbies, opinions, be fun to talk to, and generally be a multi dimensional person. I know so many women who focus on being a pretty face and making money, but men mostly don't care about women's money, and a pretty face is no replacement for a lack of personality. A pretty face, sexiness, is only good for sex. If you don't have more going on, then the sex becomes your selling point, do you get where I'm coming from?

If men only see you as an friends with benefits girl, the problem is one of the above^^. You're either looking in the wrong places, or you are looking in the right places, but the men you're dating aren't aware that you have more than sex to offer them.

[Asker]

Yes this makes sense. Thank you

[FilmGuy93]

Glad I could help! Feel free to message me if you have any more questions.

[iBeowulf]

[Pops smoke and ghosts]

[Asker]

AIDS

[iBeowulf]

Porn is actually cleaner than any partner and won't take the kids or send me to baby jail for missing a payment.

[Asker]

I- dam I guess you right

[iBeowulf]

I'm about to work out, then watch some you know what. I'm nothing special but I've turned away all women because being a bad husband and father is a close as the wife filing for divorce and throwing the book at me, regardless of my abilities. They file 80% of divorces and even in relationships they get custody virtually every time.

[Asker]

That's true, tbh I don't mind it if my man watches porn. But yeah I mean I guess if he were being a bad husband I wouldn't stay

[iBeowulf]

Bad husband = she got bored or found someone a little bit better. Commitment is a trap these days.

[Anonymous]

It's probably not HOW they see you, it just what THEY want only. So they'll look at ALL women that way. Just as you would guys if you were only looking for that right? I assume anyway lol.

[Asker]

I mean I read somewhere though that men want a relationship. Like unless you're not human or you really don't like having an emotional connection with someone, dislike hugs, kisses, cuddles, everything I don't see why men wouldn't want a relationship at all (whether its in the girl they have a thing with or not). Like if the love of your life came around, beautiful woman, great personality, nothing wrong, absolutely perfect, you wouldn't just want a friends with benefits relationship with her right? Or maybe I'm wrong.

[Opinion Owner]

It's hard to say, everyone is different. I mean, I was in that situation once and yes I did want one. I think I'm a pretty great guy as well, but she had no interest in any relationship with me so? I think everyone feels differently when it comes to feelings.

[Adam1978]

Any woman who think she has a value should reject friends with benefits. You won't get a relationship if you accept these kind of deals. Because you really given him all he needs.

[In_Trance]

maybe that's all you present to them

[Asker]

Yes I believe it could be but like how am I doing that? How can one only present sex to them

[In_Trance]

You tell me. Maybe it's your timing. Keep your clothes on and see what happens

[Asker]

Okay, thank you for your honesty