Would you agree on this statement: "Men are not a communicative people" ? (Page 2)

Question

Is it about their biology, their gender or what? But most men indeed do not like to share anything about themselves or what they do in a normal day, they rather to keep everything reserved and in secrecy.  For example my brother early this morning left the house very early in the morning cause someone came and pick him up. Before he left he just told mom and me he was going to down town, period. We dont know who the person was who came to pick him up, maybe it was a friend sure, but we dont know who it was. So he left and returned home like 5 hours later safe and sound which that was the important thing anyway. My brother is an adult. I asked my brother where did he go since he left early and just told us "im going downtown" that is the only thing he mentioned he did not give details of the errands he was going to do with the friend who came and pick him up. I continue and ask and ask if it had something to do with a friend of him who had been illed from the last 2 months (he need a heart transplant and he is just 43). I thought maybe if it was related to that he may had been visiting the friend in his house since he left early from home or that his friend got worse or something like that but i will neer know if that was related or not. So my brother insisted and told me again "I was in downtown", then he added : "Why you want to know? I dont have to tell you, I never asked you where you go anyway" And this is a lie beause when I go out my brother do ask me where do I go. I always say where do I go to my mom so she knows at least where I am. Anyway, my brother always had been like that he never report to anyone where he goes or what he does, he is a secret in that, cause he says he does not like it. In fact my mom never ever in her life since my brother was younger know who are my brotehr friends, my mom or even myself never had met any friend of my brother, not even dates, lady friends, nothing

RawIronhide · Answer

I didn't even feel like reading your whole question, so maybe that'll tell you something.
It's not that I don't care just make things shorter more digestible. We like to communicate if we trust you enough but like schedule some time if it's going to take so long I'm tired after coming home from work so please don't do it then.

Adam1978 · Answer

Not true men are very good at communicating what they want and find important. It's just that most of our mundane tasks aren't worth talking about. It's better to focus on getting them done. We don't play games we give you the information you need or want you to have. Not what you wish for. If anything it's women that doesn't communicate well since you didn't explain why you wanted the info.

ZackBan · Answer

People are individuals not genders. Just because your brother isn't a good communicator doesn't mean all men are, he doesn't represent all of us. Not to mention I could make a long list of women I met who had no clue about communication yet I would never make a prejudiced claim against all women

hahahmm · Answer

A lot of men have experienced telling a woman details & seeing her eyes glaze over, 1-2 sentences into it. So men learn not to waste feelings/deep thoughts/experiences on people like that. It saves everybody time if he says, 'eh' or "Hoorah" instead of telling a story. If you want more details, I guess you have to convince him that you're actually listening.

Anonymous · Answer

Men are not women, we do not think like women, we do not act like women, and we do not deal with emotions the same way.

We do not “communicate” the way women do.
Women think this means we are broken because they believe we have to be the way they are or else there is something wrong with us.

Men have evolved from the animals that were hunters and gatherers where being emotional would get you killed. Therefore we were programmed to deal with emotions internally and by ourselves.

Women were in groups of other women all the time and “sharing” and being emotional helped them bond and deal with things. They were able to grow their community that way.

So... men do not give details, they do not share emotions, they do not do the over sharing women want.

jshm2 · Answer

No, as then we'd both be wrong.

Most of the greatest, books, speeches, seminars and communications have been by men. Hence your assertion is wrong off the bat that we are not a "communicative people".

The problem is you're looking for every man to fit your trope, and failing. Thus choosing to pile the blame onto men instead of admitting your ideas are wrong.

AviatorTom · Answer

No, that's too simple a statement. There's a key difference between the way men and women communicate. When women tell a story, it's like reading an epic novel, long and very detailed. When men tell the same story, it's like reading a short story... just the basics.

That difference drives both men and women crazy.

Women, because we men don't give all the details.
Men, because we men get bored with repetitive details. Just get to the punchline!

Anonymous · Answer

People can be very opportunistic, nosy and gossipy.
I've learned to be very careful about what information I tell my mom, sister and my guy friends as well. It's not that we don't want to talk, we're just tired of everyone being in our business and using everything we say against us. We learn to keep our mouths shut.

Wester1967 · Answer

In general I'd say yes. But I am a conversation and language teacher. My MO is communication. I am a disciple of papa legba, the voodoo loa of communication. Also an INFJ mbti. Engram 8. Which means I operate three levels above and three levels below of everyone else simultaneously. So the answer is yes. But not always. Long live Papa Legba.

Anonymous · Answer

The bigger question is why are women so damn nosy, why do they have to know every single part of everyone's life. God forbid we only tell the relevant details. We don't feel the need to impart the information about our day from the moment we get up to the second we go to bed like women seem to feel the need to make everyone aware of.

Anonymous · Answer

You’re talking about your brother as if he’s 12 years old. Why would you need to know his friends, their numbers, who he’s with, and why would you worry about him getting back safe? He’s a man.

We only share things if we think they need to be shared.

MJtheCoach · Answer

Me are! But women wanna talk about everything. And they don’t want solution to anything. They wanna bitch 24/7!!
Nagging without wanting a solution is called Whining.

Men talk all the time with each other, but we argue to come up with a solution the end.

Notfabricated11 · Answer

I feel like it depends on which generation your talking about. Back then males were told to keep everything in. Even if you watch the media back then men didn't really say too much. Nowadays men talk just as much as woman do now. I come up from an era of the actions speak louder than words and the strong and silent type era. So I was never much of a talker. Lol I'm working on it.

kenz000 · Answer

Always just depends on the person of course, but I think we all can take time to feel comfortable with saying our feelings out loud. We have to be patient with each other or they will never want to share it

ArrowheadSW · Answer

It sounds like your brother is a very private person. However, he really should open up a bit more. It sounds like it is to the point of being a bit antisocial.

Assi2k · Answer

Lemme fix that for you, “Men don’t communicate the way women do.”

Anonymous · Answer

Of course not. Men may be people of few words sometimes but that doesn't mean he doesn't communicate. You do have to understand though that any male with a lack of social sense learns that women judge EVERYTHING he does. So if he's smart he knows the LESS he says the better. It prevents her from twisting his words.

Anonymous · Answer

It's true that men are less likely to verbalize every thought that pops into their heads like women are, but it's pretty dumb to claim men are not communicative people. That's just silly. Some of the most communicative people I know are men, and some of the least communicative people I know are women.

BeMuse · Answer

It’s more like we don’t want to spend half of our life talking about the other half of our lives to try to relive it. That’s boring conversation... Talk about something interesting and guys will talk.

DizzyDesii · Answer

Untrusting men are not communicative. But once you’ve earned their trust, i believe they’ll open up to you within time

Would you agree on this statement: "Men are not a communicative people" ? (Page 2)

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