Is my ex trying to stalk me online after I blocked him on social media?

[Indigo74]

I broke things off 3 1/2 months ago after a seven month messy situationship. We had and still have very strong feelings for each other, but he doesn’t want to commit and I want to be in a relationship, so I ended things. I went no contact and blocked him on Facebook and Instagram. We’ve run into each other a few times, things got a bit intimate a few weeks ago. But I told him if he hadn’t changed his mind about committing, I couldn’t be his friends with benefits or emotional security blanket, and I need to let him go and move on.

The following week, he started liking several of our mutual friends’ Facebook live videos of me within 30 seconds of them posting. I found out that he looked at my LinkedIn profile a week ago; don’t know if he’s looked at it prior to that because I’m rarely in that account. Dad let me to check my Google analytics, and the day after that, he was spending time on both my travel blog and my professional website.

What is he trying to accomplish? He can’t keep tabs on me through LinkedIn or my websites because I don’t post updates on either one of those. I only know about the Facebook likes because my friends tell me about them; he’s blocked so I can’t see his activity. He hasn’t contacted me; and I’m assuming he hasn’t changed his mind about wanting to be in a relationship. Is this just him adoring me from a far? It’s starting to get really creepy.

[bobby_bush_eater]

Seems he's lost/in denial. The end game is probably just sex if you say he remains non committal after the intimate run in.

[Indigo74]

I wish it were for sex, lol. He stopped wanting that about two months in because it was just too intimate/close for him. We remained exclusive, but his boundary was making out for hours, usually second base, very rarely third base. For the record, I am 47F, he’s 53M. That being said, I do think he wants to use me for the comfort and familiarity and intimacy when it’s convenient. That’s why I told him I can’t do that for him.

[bobby_bush_eater]

Perhaps fear then. At that age for a man it can be hard to establish new connections

[boobliker]

he nay still love you so is still intrested in what you get up too...

[spartan55]

Yeah, 'adoring' you... that's it.. 😂 😂 😂

[Guy13]

Some people never quit...

[Guy13]

Are your friends going to have to block him too... just to keep him out of your life in a secondary way? You guys are in a huge Power struggle. It does not seem healthy... Is he the guy for you?

[Indigo74]

Definitely not. We’re all in the same big social circle, and I don’t wanna put my friends in the middle of it. I’m just going to ask them to not post things about me anymore, or adjust their privacy settings so he can’t see the posts.

[Guy13]

Okay, so they are going to have to adjust privacy settings.. that's what I thought. But like you said, don't post anything that involves you for this reason:
Is he liking your involvement OR is he playing secondary Jealousy Games and actually liking "their involvement". The Jury is still out on that... Make sure that he has full access and see if he likes them. He is trying to reach you one of two ways. The first being you assume he is chasing one of them and that is GRAVY... most likely trying to stay in the forefront of your mind and in a secondary way CONTROL you... no dating for you. You guys are a volcanic explosion just waiting to happen as you both are hard-headed (power/controlling)

[Indigo74]

Just for clarification, the two mutual friends that post live videos of me and photos of me, usually in a group, are an engaged couple. There are no photos that look like I’m dating anybody else. And the live videos are always of me singing with one of our musician friends or at a jam night that he and I always attend separately. I don’t think there’s anything to be jealous about there. He can kind of keep track of where I’m going out with them that way. But there’s nothing to be gleaned from my LinkedIn profile or my websites, other than just reading about my work and seeing a few pictures of me. He already has pictures of me on his phone and he can watch all my videos on YouTube. And I think he’s watching those too, lol.

[Indigo74]

And I should add that he is very controlling. He always controlled the pace of our situationship, how often we saw each other didn’t see each other, exactly what we could and couldn’t do with regards to physical intimacy, how much or how little we communicated. Typical fearful avoidant, terrified of intimacy and having to control everything. I shouldn’t be surprised it’s driving him insane that he can’t control me anymore.

[Guy13]

Passive Aggressive and Controlling behavior would be suddenly more busy than ever on shared friends pages trying to keep an eye on you. The best thing is to lay low and respond to everyone less... And watch if he tries to bring you out...

[Anonymous]

A lot of men don't know how to let go.

[SpaceGalaxy]

men and women both!!!

[Indigo74]

And the frustrating thing is that this was his idea! He’s the one who’s been saying for months that he only wanted to be friends, yet is acting like anything but friends. This. Is. What. He. Wanted. 🤷🏻‍♀️