Ghosted. Does it mean anything if the person still keeps tabs on me?

[Anonymous]

So I was ghosted by my really good guy friend. The Friday before he ghosted me, we went to a lake (just the two of us), found a deserted boat dock, pulled his car up, sat on the hood, drank coffee and just talked. For about 2-3 months we'd been hanging out every Friday, where we would get coffee and sit in his car and talk for a few hours.

The week following our hangout, my life got a bit challenging. My best friend/one of my roommates got a boyfriend, and suddenly was hardly around and my parents were busy with my brother. So I was pretty lonely. I texted my guy friend, asking if our Friday hangout was still on. He ended up saying that he was sorry but because of a "work conflict," he wouldn't be able to hang out on Fridays anymore. Since Fridays were the only days we hung out, I was upset. So I got mad and said some rude things. Apologized later, thinking we'd be okay cause we'd fought before... never got a text back. A few days later he removed me from all of us private stories. A few days after that I messaged him and asked if he'd come to my apartment and just talk it out. He responded, basically getting mad at my insistence and that was the last time I ever heard from him. There's a lot more details but that's the basic story. Back to my question.

From the very first week, he has never blocked me or missed any of my story posts on insta or snapchat. Now at first I was actively checking, now I just see his name as I look through who viewed my stuff. He unfollowed all my friends he followed before, even my best friend who he knew. He is so active on my page that he is always one of the top 10 of my story viewers (key piece of info... I posted my very first insta story AFTER we stopped talking).

It's been about four months now. I'm not over him, he left me with too many questions. But I am healing. However, this fact has always confused me.

Why not block me? Why continue viewing my stuff? What does that mean? If anything?

[introvertedHeartache]

I’d move on and not make it a big deal. I know guys who view IG stories of every girl cuz they’re bored or it just pops up. I’ve learned that it means nothing and he’s probably looking through multiple girls too. I don’t think you handled it correctly by getting mad at him for not being available one Friday but you tried to correct it by asking to talk it out which he declined and proceeded to delete your friends. At this point he’s not worth the drama. Just focus on your own life and let this boy go. Social media means nothing. If he really wanted to know how you were doing he would call or text.

[Asker]

Just for clarification so I don't seem too insane lol, he was calling off our Friday hangouts completely. Not just that one Friday. And he only hung out with me on Fridays... so I knew not having those meant our friendship was over and that hurt which led me to lash out. Totally wrong on my part still but wanted to explain more details.

[introvertedHeartache]

Oh well then I get why you’d be upset. I misread and thought it was just that one Friday because of his “work conflict”. It’s possible he had a schedule change that meant he couldn’t be free on Fridays which maybe had nothing to do with you so when you got mad he was over it. But either way what’s done is done and it’s been 4 months. Go out and have fun with other people and if he so happens to see you’re doing good without him then that’s his loss. 🤷🏻‍♀️

[Asker]

Yeah totally see why you'd read it that way lol. It's still kinda sad to me that over a year of friendship was lost because he "was over it" after that one incident. I'd never lost it like that on him before. Having been so close to him just 3 days before made it so much harder.

[introvertedHeartache]

I know it sucks to lose someone who you were once close with especially over an incident but that’s life. Things happen… people change… their lives change and so do priorities and even attitudes. Don’t take it personal. Just accept it’s time to move on and make new friends! :)

[Guy13]

Yes, it means he made be certifiable crazy... but you could be too. So maybe you two could be a good match !!!