How long does it really take for a guy to move on?

[Anonymous]

My ex broke up with me 4 days ago and I want to fix the relationship we had before and they always say give a guy space and if he comes back it's ment to be if he doesn't let it go and that's what I'm doing but I just have this sick feeling that he's already over me and he's out there ya know getting laid but I can't think that way bc he's a single man now he can do whatever he wants.

Updates

1 y

I did reach out to him only once to ask him about his shirt and he did Reminisse how he wanted to start the building blocks of a family with me and this is why it sucks, he told me goodnight and please leave him alone for a while.

[Idk20]

When I broke up with my girlfriend at the time a few years ago I wouldn’t come back to her until she finally gave me space for about a year a few years later and we are now happily married.
If he ever really loved you thoughts of you will always be in the back of his head that he can’t let go of.

[Asker]

Just scared he will move on to fast for me to even fix this relationship

[Idk20]

I don’t know all the details of what happened between you two but try not to be to pushy about getting back together give him some space but don’t quite let him forgetting about you and most importantly try to be patient

[warsevf]

It took 7 years for me to ask another girl out when my first turned me down. And now 4 years until I got over the second one and another 3 years of lone wolf. Now ready for round three.

Yeah the mileage may vary.

[LiamJHayden]

It depends upon the guy. I tend to move on quickly. Some never do. Most are somewhere in between.

[Anonymous]

It takes about 3 months however if another girls come sooner than that it will speed up the process by a lot. Why did you two break up?

[Asker]

He told me to get off social media and I did partially, just bc of business but he wanted me off snap, and then he wanted me to stop talking to my friends, then another issue was I wanted to go to the gym to make myself a better person for him bc I felt like I was competing for him and had insecurities and I had to fix that but he didn't want me going and I didn't listen I went anyway, so basically his reason for breaking up with me was bc I didn't respect him nor did I trust his words or actions of why he didn't want me doing things plus I've lied just about the gym and he doesn't take lightly of lying, plus we are so bad we argue take a break then come back and he said he doesn't want to keep doing this dance he wants a wife and a long relationship, everyone hid brother, friend told me he will come back just give him space but deep down I just feel like this is it, and ever since we broke up I've sat here isolating my self and thinking where I went wrong but how to fix this. There's just things he text me during our break up makes it sound like he won't come back, but I don't know.

[Opinion Owner]

Well, in my opinion, he is a horrible guy to date and marry.
There is only ever 1 problem in relationships.
People move out of harmony with each other and it shows up in their actions.
It sounds like he is very controlling from the paragraph you typed.
There has to be a mutual vision for the relationship.
If there isn't one; two separate, usually unconscious, visions will be at war. That sums up your relationship. He wants this and you want that. It is expressed in your actions and causes separation mentally, emotionally, and ultimately physically.

My advice is move on from him. Why? Because when a couple is out of harmony they must show more courtesy than at any point and if they don't the relationship will end eventually. The desire to be together will continue to chip away. It cannot be one-sided. He is not ready for a wife. The only wife that would fit with him is a super submissive one. You're not ready for a husband because you don't understand either. You can try but you're relying on luck. Understand how this works and you don't need luck.

Your emotions are going to convince you to stay with him until your emotions are more painful than delightful and you lose all belief. So logic will not help you but I highly recommend you move on right now. The pain hurts BAD but it will fade and the wiser you get the more it will continue to fade because you'll see that what I have told you is correct. Plus some new guy will come and it will be great. But follow your heart because it's your life. Sometimes the only way to learn is the hard way. And there is always a chance things can drastically turn around.

[Pterodon]

Depends on the depth of feelings involved