People say I’m pretty but no one approaches me, why is that?

[Anonymous]

I have been told I am pretty, and some back story I suffer from pretty bad body dysmorphia. When I look in a mirror I see a literal troll looking back at me. It’s hard to know what to trust sometimes. and I am aware that there are many factors that can play into others not approaching me. However, it just seems no one approaches me. I saw somethings online saying that people usually gravitate to attractive people ( not to sound self-centered). I’m pretty shy but I do try to talk to other people and try to be nice, but they always just drift away from me and I’m alone again. I’ve often wondered if it’s my demeanour or my intonation or just plain others don’t find me all that interesting. I don’t care for petty drama or gossiping, I find it all pretty pointless honestly. women and men in my classes don't associate with me at all unless we’re forced to work with me. I don’t think I’ve given them any reason to truly dislike me. I try to treat everyone nicely when I meet them to get a feel for what kind of person they are. So yeah I’m just confused.

[Fireguy17]

It could possibly be how you present yourself.
Your body language might be off, or you might not be out there all happy and cheerful but withdrawn.
I have never met nor seen you, so I am only guessing.

[Asker]

Hmm, yeah that might be it. I do tend to be more self reserved. Thank you :)

[Anonymous]

It could be anything. I feel like I am in similiar shoes as a guy.

[wigrid]

People may be hesitate of you because you're introverted. And remember that those with dysmorphic disorder see themselves in a distorted way.

[Asker]

That’s a good point. And yeah body dysmorphia is true hell

[wigrid]

I know people with dysmorphic disorder, most of them are beautiful and handsome but they don't like themselves. Have you tried getting therapy?

[Asker]

In the process of getting help for it, tho there’s a waiting list :/

[wigrid]

You're just making up scenarios in your head that you're ugly. That's okay because most people with dysmorphic disorder see themselves as monster. I believe that you will overcome this syndrome, trust yourself✌🏻

[Asker]

Thank you for ur kind words :)

[wigrid]

🧚🏻✌🏻

[Nikki1989]

Most men are pretty slow at approaching these days.

[boobliker]

maybe you sending out bad vibes

[Anonymous]

Because you're emotionally unavailable.

[Asker]

What made u come to that conclusion?

[Opinion Owner]

The entire post. You assume rejection without actually being rejected. While this is human and normal, to surrender to it is not, or at least not good.
There' an old Dr. Phil saying I like "You wouldn't worry about what people thought of you if you realized how seldom they do". This just simply means that people's favorite subjects is THEM generally. People aren't going to talk to you, embrace you as a friend, etc. Without reason to.

[Asker]

I do realize it’s not all me, it could just be other just being in their own world. And I never said I wanted people to randomly come to me as a friend as if they already knew me (unrealistic) my point was when I do try to reach out to make a connection nothign rlly happens and I wasn’t sure if it was me or just bc I’m not interesting. To them

[Asker]

But u do have a point with others do like the subject to be about themselves :)

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah some people are one sided no doubt. You will put energy into some people and you will get NOTHING back. But that's on them not on you. I used to have a hard time with rejection. Then one day someone said something that completely changed my world. They said "you're blaming yourself for someone else's hangups". Who knows why someone rejects, moreover WHO CARES! You got friends and family who love you right? That ain't by accident! Ask them why they love you and I promise you they'll give you a much more accurate assessment of why and who you are then someone you barely know.
It's a failing of human beings that we give too much weight to the words and actions to the people that don't really know us rather than the people who do.

[Opinion Owner]

Remember when someone rejects you. They're probably not rejecting you. They're most likely rejecting thier PERCEPTION of you. And if they hardly know you, the perception sucks!

[Asker]

Those are some great words of advice :) thank you