Did I make the right call?

[Anonymous]

So I've been talking to this and after a few dates we slept together and the next day he said he liked me but he didn't want a relationship. We get along pretty well and he's all smiles around me while everyone gets a sour face that one day while we we were talking and laughing his manager said he's never seen him smile so much. It's been about 4 months and I ghosted him a couple times but he texts me asking if I'm okay if I ignore him for at least a week but this time I made up my mind that we should stop and just be friends. I still joke around with him but the other day I sorta made a sexual joke and his response was pretty annoyed to say the least " Why are you flirting with me you said u didn’t wanna do that?" I know I'm the one that broke it off but I thought we could be friends tho and I was just teasing him with a meme I found funny. it's hard for me too even tho I really like him like a lot like a lot a lot probably way more than he likes me. It's just really bad timing rn to say the least. I wanted to be with him from the get go but he didn't want a relationship so I backed off but we kept sleeping together and stuff and now I wanna stop cause I don't see this going anywhere, I've started talking to other people to get my mind off things. Now it's just 1 to 5 vague boring replies like 'same' 'yh' 'same to you and thanks' nth like our usual messages at all. Should I say something about it.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like you made a difficult but ultimately healthy decision to end the romantic aspect of your relationship with this person and focus on being friends. It's important to prioritize your own emotional well-being and to set boundaries that feel comfortable for you.

In terms of his response to your sexual joke, it's possible that he may have felt confused or uncomfortable given the previous conversations you had about not wanting to pursue a relationship. It may be helpful to have an open and honest conversation with him about your intentions and feelings, and to clarify any misunderstandings or miscommunications that may have arisen.

It's also important to be patient and understanding as you navigate this transition from a romantic relationship to a friendship. It's normal for there to be some awkwardness or distance at first, but with time and effort, you may be able to rebuild a strong and supportive friendship.

Ultimately, it's up to you to decide whether or not you want to address his vague and unenthusiastic responses. If you feel comfortable doing so, you could try reaching out and expressing your concern in a non-confrontational way. However, if you feel that it's best to give him space or to focus on other relationships, that's okay too. It's important to prioritize your own emotional well-being and to surround yourself with people who value and respect you.

[Asker]

I think it's best I just back a way and move on from him and forget about it. I asked if he wanted this to be a relationship because I did and he said no he like me but doesn't want a relationship. So I stopped pressing it and said fine but we kept hanging out for 3 months after that. We both have busy schedules so we meet up every other week but we text everyday and stuff and he says shit like I missed you and I actually believed we were progressing butvwhile we were watching a movie I saw him texting a another girl a video of him half naked. I asked him about it his response 'its just a video bro stop being jealous like wtf' and then he wants me to call him babe or baby like there isn't a fucking label on us in the first place like wtf. Theb ge gets distant, cold in his text messages even but whenever he comes over to my work place cause we are kinda co-workers different stores tho he calls my name of poked me to get my attention when I literally try to pretend he's not there. Like wtf is wrong with this guy. I told him all my concerns about this casual dating thing and that I was starting to feel too. much about this relationship that wouldn't go anywhere at all. If he really cared and didn't wanna lose me he could have sad I understand what your trying to say and we can date with a. possible relationship in mind instead. of just having casual sex with no relationship in mind.

[Opinion Owner]

It sounds like you have made a wise decision to back away and move on from this person. It's important to prioritize your own well-being and to make decisions that are in line with your own values and goals.

It's clear from your description that there were some significant issues in your relationship with this person, including a lack of communication, trust, and respect. It's important to remember that you deserve to be treated with respect and kindness, and that there are people out there who will value and appreciate you for who you are.

Moving on from a relationship can be difficult, but it's important to take care of yourself and to focus on your own well-being. Surround yourself with supportive friends and family, engage in activities that make you happy and fulfilled, and remember that you are worthy of love and respect. With time and effort, you can heal and move forward into a brighter and more fulfilling future.

[OlderAndWiser]

You are giving an extremely confused message to him. Do you want a relationship? Yes or no? Decide and then be consistent with how you treat him.

And, for many people, it is impossble to go backwards in a relationship, so don't expect to be just friends if that is all that you want.

[Asker]

I wanted a relationship I was the one that asked if he wanted to start seriously saying and I got shit down with a deadpan no followed by I don't want a relationship but I still like u a lot and all.

[OlderAndWiser]

You need to walk away from this without looking back.

[spartan55]

Say what? He has no interest in being your friend.

[Asker]

Then what does he wanna be cause it's certainly not my boyfriend all he wants to do is have sex and flirt clearly. And make joking comments about my small butt and if it was bigger I'd get even more attention from men.

[spartan55]

How do you not know what that guy wants? Pretty obvious he just wants sex.