Why are women's value always based on their physical beauty and age?

[Anonymous]

Like I'm so tired of being a woman. All guys value, or what they value THE MOST, is the way a woman looks and how old she is.

If you're young and beautiful then that's the only time men and women will acknowledge you.

If you're older but smart, kind, positive, talented and wise but not so physically beautiful you literally have no value to barely anyone.

However men are valued for their qualities, not their age and looks. Men are valued for their masculinity, confidence, intelligence, being rich, funny, kind, and all those things. Even if a man is ugly and old but has those qualities people still acknowledge him and value him.

But if an old ugly woman has those qualities it's the opposite.

I'm tired of men, they are so shallow

[Ozanne]

This stems from our biology. A fertile, healthy woman was usually younger, so throughout time, it's been younger women men have been after -- when it came to sex. Since then, we've learned to appreciate women as they age, as they offer something more over time. For example in the Renaissance years, women who were older were very respected. They were the medicine women and healers. They told stories, and offered wise words. In those days, aging was almost something to look forward to.

Today with television and internet, we are exposed to so much phoniness and porn, that it's men who usually have this unrealistic image of what they think beauty should be when off their computers, it's not that way at all. They then criticize what's normal, when all the phoniness was from their devices. What's worse, there are women falling for it, and going through drastic measures to change their looks just to appease them.

No one seems to be doing any of the real people any favours.

My advice is to take heart that a lot of guys around your age are still finding out what real is from the fake, and will take some time before they accept that what they've been hoping for doesn't actually exist in many women. I feel for your generation because a lot of young women and men are waiting and frustrated with finding someone because each side has their wires crossed with expectations put on one another. I'm sure there are many who are just as eager to find the right person and know better. I hope for your sake you find that person some time soon, if that's what you want. ♥

[Asker]

Thank you so much, this was so comforting to read. AHhh I love women like you so much <3

[BarryLiverstone]

Things I value about women in my life:


My mom :


- she’s smart. She will answer my questions, can handle responsibility, and can lead a meeting or plan events.


- she’s organized. She knows who has a birthday, knows where we are meeting for family events, has a craft room stocked with supplies, keeps important records and so many odds and ends in line.


- she’s talented. Has a kiln and does ceramics, crochet, gardens, cooks, sings, makes homemade gifts for Christmas and is the queen of spreadsheets


My Grandma (in heaven)


- so faithful. Her Faith in God meant I never saw her in a bad mood. She loved her family and gave us all compliments, saying how blessed God made her.


- so kind. She would give $ to sponsor children overseas she never even met. She would smile and brighten a room. She would host a party and do all she could to make everyone feel comfortable and happy.


So lucky. Would beat me often playing games ! Loved the competition and taught me how to win fairly. She would luck into good fortune and often due to her hard work.


My sister in law


- devoted to family. Shows her value in raising two kids while always spending quality time with two sets of family and enjoying the fellowship.


- big heart. She wants to help special needs children and as such works at a school to focus on their needs. She doesn’t strive for lots of money or glory; her best days are when the kids at school smile and feel more normal.


Role model. She prays, dances, cleans, leads, laughs, encourages, teases, shares… all with a positive attitude to show others with Gods help all things can be done. She is so friendly but also confident and has healthy boundaries.

[BarryLiverstone]

I can list about 20 more women in my life and many more things I value about the 3 I’ve already listed. Trust me, appearance and youth are not the only things that guys value in women.

What do you value in men?

[Asker]

That is very beautiful, also sorry for your loss.

But in terms of marriage, men value beauty and age the most.

I value them being religious and faithful to God, I value morals, I value intelligence, wisdom, loyalty, being a good father and being kind.

[BarryLiverstone]

Thank you, I know I will see her again in heaven. We both know the value of morals and Faith in God.

What I would push back on however is that both guys and girls value looks initially. You can see all the questions on gag as an example as when the girls ask about a crush or about someone they want to approach them the guy is always attractive. So the looks is valuable to everyone at first.

But in a longer term relationship don’t you think that everyone values some of the things we have listed more? Because lots of people get married and stay married for a lifetime, even when wrinkles and white hair comes. So while the first day you see someone looks are valuable, I’d say 1 year and 60 years later there are many things guys and girls value more than looks and youth.

Are you maybe frustrated with certain guys and how shallow they seem?

[BarryLiverstone]

I’m guessing if you polled guys who are engaged many would not say it’s her looks that’s the only reason they proposed

[Asker]

Yes, but looks and age always comes first, especially for women. The other qualities are just bonuses.
I am frustrated with all men because they are all the same and shallow.
Studies show men prefer girls age 14 the most, since I'm not 14 it's fucking over pluss I'm ugly

[BarryLiverstone]

Can you please share the link for those studies? I’d guess less than 1% of guys prefer a 14 year old.

We both agree that first the most important thing is looks. That’s for guys and girls. I have yet to hear a woman say she approached a guy who was ugly to her.

If you feel ugly that’s another challenge. Loving yourself is key because even if you are not actually ugly and even if you met a guy you were into; your self esteem would frustrate him

[Asker]

com/r/science/comments/2nh1nb/science_ama_series_we_are_alan_sanders_michael/cmds0hy
file:///C:/Users/Iselin/Downloads/rip. jpg

Then what is the most attractive age?

[BarryLiverstone]

The link did not work.

I’d say for most people 30 and under is the healthiest and most attractive human beings.

[BarryLiverstone]

What age are you most into? Think people can vary with their subjective opinions

[Asker]

I just know you also want 14 year old girls, you're like the rest of men. No, more like all men.
All men say (or at least think but don't say it out loud) women over the age of 25 are ugly, old and worthless because they want "youth" and "beauty". If you're not 14-24 they look upon you as worthless. If you're under 25 you're only a sex object existing for them.
The only thing they want and value is beauty and youth, if you don't have that you're worthless to men

[BarryLiverstone]

Frankly if you think all guys are worthless then stop interacting with them. I tried to be nice but this was disappointing to see

[Asker]

I never said men are worthless, they aren't, but they are all shallow.

I know you talk to 14 year old girls and flirted with one because I have talked to you before when I was 14

[BarryLiverstone]

True this is gag. A place to practice flirting and talking to lots of people. Obv irl wouldn’t talk to someone underage

[inhua]

those qualities are achievable for women. every other quality is just a bonus

and men's value also comes from looks and age too but that alone is not the bare minimum thus the bar is much higher for men than it is for women

in regards to looks, a woman won't choose an ugly, short, disabled man no matter how funny and confidence he is. maybe if he had money but that does not guarantee love or burning desire from his woman

and when it comes to age, young men are disregarded as dumb and immature and older men are disregarded as useless and physically incapable of doing anything which is why they don't get hired as often for jobs

most simple breakdown

women - be good looking and young which is easy

men - be good looking and young (visually), be old (mentally) be tall, be strong, have a big dick, be confident, be masculine, be rich, have high status, be funny, be interesting, be educated, be smart, be mature, be wise, be willing to sacrifice his life for his family/community/country and be important to someone who cares enough about them which is much harder

[Asker]

Well neither has it easy then. I am not beautiful or young and therefore useless

[inhua]

women can never be useless in society. there's a reason why women are the ones off a sinking ship first before the men even dare think about hopping on

as far as "useless" is concerned, this varies from person to person depending on what they need and what can be brought to the table

[DextroShade]

You are under 18, aren't you? And all a young woman really has to do is not be fat and she will get male attention.

[mynxx]

No one ever said you had to have a big dock, I dont know where you guys get this from. There are plenty of jobless bums with girlfriends. Just be kind and have a brain (don’t have a past of sleeping with a million girls though). Show that you respect people and you’ll be fine, literally

[inhua]

@mynxx not everything has to be said by word of mouth. actions speak louder than words

[Asker]

@DextroShade Just shut the fuck up, that is not fucking true. I am not fat, I have never been. No man has ever complimented me in real llife, asked me out, looked twice, been interested in me or anything like that. Men don't even look my way, you don't know what you're talking about.
AND FUCK MEN, the fact that I'm considered to be in my prime in my teens is just fucking horrible. Men can go fuck themselves in the ass being the shallow pigs they are and I will in return just kill myself since I have no value anyway

[inhua]

never been complimented before in your life? welcome to a man's world where not only do you not get complimented but constantly ridiculed for your very existence unless you have some sort of value pertaining to genetics, resources and a degree of authority and even then you are not allowed to voice your opinion without the woke lunatics trying to cancel you

[Asker]

Yes, that is my fucking life so don't fucking tell me I have it easy and get male attention because I'm born female and young. I have never got male attention or validation, and because I'm ugly I'm worthless, and since I'll be old soon I'm even more worthless

[inhua]

never got male attention or validation?

how about getting bullied, mocked, ridiculed, ostracized just for standing up for yourself?

how about getting told to commit suicide and nobody would mourn for you when you do so, actually they will celebrate such suicides?

how about being falsely labeled as losers, incels, creeps, rapists, terrorists, criminals just for existing and having campaigns pushing for the government to hunt down such people and execute them as if they are monsters?

sure everybody has their struggles but objectively not every gendered issue is comparable

[Sweetsurprize]

1. You will not catch me dating an older man, no thanks. If other women want to do it, then let them. It just means it's not genuine/real love. They are probably using him for money or status. Not a good start for an authentic, lasting relationship.

2. Throughout history, yes, being young and fertile got you places because infant death was rather common, especially in the past two centuries. What a power women have to be able to bear new life! Amazing.

3. When women are youth, they ARE often at their most beautiful (usually) because that is when nature and science/biology is saying FUCK her so she can bare your children/kids.

4. Life is long... if you're lucky and smart/wise and make good choices that benefit not only you but any offspring you get to have. You GET TO SEE them grow up and mature into capable adults who are also able to bear offspring and give you grandchildren/grandkids. Such is the cycle/circle of life. Only in modern times have MONEY become KING/QUEEN and praised the way it has been, but I still feel it is better than being pre-industrial times where you had to KILL for food or steal and sanitation was unheard of. Modern day/modern times, has it's problems but most of the basics have been solved. At least that was the idea. I don't know what is happening now though, I think people got TOO greedy though with their money and power and kept those things for themselves. TOO MUCH of a good thing like they say, isn't good!

[love_conquers_lust]

1. What business do you have dating younger men? Explain to me the “depth” of a cougar preying on younger men who are more interested in getting their dick wet than supporting you. Wisdom knows no age. What’s a matter, scared older men will make you feel inferior?

4. On the right track. People still steal. Too much of a good thing isn’t in fact a good thing, like listening to a woman’s opinion.

[Sweetsurprize]

@love_conquers_lust 1. Dude how mean lol. I NEVER indicated I was interested in younger men! That was just YOUR projected opinion upon me. Assume much? ! My last ex was my same age 2. Wisdon DOES know age, if they play their cards right and actually LEARN from their mistakes in life!

>What’s a matter, scared older men will make you feel inferior?< Nope, I'm just not attracted so why are you FORCING the issue? ! I don't want to date someone with Erectile dysfunction or someone with gray/white hair that's thinning, etc. Why are you so hurt? Lol. I'm not a cougar and I don't want to be. I was just giving my opinions and thoughts! Lay off!

>4. On the right track. People still steal. Too much of a good thing isn’t in fact a good thing, like listening to a woman’s opinion.< Yeah, I never said you HAD to listen to anyone but your selfish self lol. A lot of people are like this anyway, so go ahead and lead a "happy" life and leave me alone! If you truly want an answer as to why cougars like younger men, I'm not it!

[love_conquers_lust]

Guess what. You assumed that assumption. I didn't explicitly say you liked younger guys. I was probing because you were vague. I asked what business you had dating them if you were to. So not younger, not older. What. Born on the exact same day?

No, wisdom does not know age. It's unwise to say so. They're independent. Wisdom is reserved for those who learn from their experiences, not just live them. The latter get participation trophies, the former get the spoils. I don't got ED, but I got grays and thinning hair. Neither of which gets in the way of what I need to do, so far at least. Comes with being a survivor, bitter sweetness of life.

You also insulted other women's preferences saying it's not genuine love. That was in your opinion. So, I did listen to your opinion. It's shit. But at least I gave you the respect to grace you with consideration. Hopefully you gain some wisdom from it instead of merely shooting your mouth off. We all have preferences, doesn't mean they need to be honored or fulfilled by anyone, including yourself.

You girls need to learn that part of having an opinion is getting criticized. You have to defend it if you want guys to treat you as equals and gain support. Getting all fucking mad and butthurt will win you the same mockery as stereotypical women who are emotional nuts.

You want people to leave you alone, don't talk, walk away. Or be agreeable. Or do what you're told. Or... defend your opinion.

[patrick994]

You are too pretentious for 39 years old, you are not young anymore and from what I read you are not beautiful either, so you cannot expect to have the perfect man, one thing is for sure, you talk a lot, but in reality you will have to make do in life, please stop, you are 39 years old, you are not a teenager anymore.

[Sweetsurprize]

@love_conquers_lust You're the one shooting your mouth off. My opnion isn't shit. It's based on NATURE and the way biology works dumbass! If NATURE wanted senior citizens to care for babies, then menopause wouldn't happen! And USUALLY (and I say that with a grain of salt), age DOES equal wisdom, though I agree, unfortunately, it's not always. You will always find stubborn old folks such as yourself, believing what you want to believe so that they can feel better about their plight in life.

My ex and I aren't the same exact age, I think you need better comprehension skills to be honest. We were seven months apart with him being older. I felt that I didn't need to specify because generally people know what I am referring to when I say "same age". It usually means same year or give or take 4/5 years if not less.

Anyway, yeah, I felt that you overstepped yourself when you ASSUMED I liked younger men. No where did I indicate it so.

[Sweetsurprize]

@patrick994 Oh shut up. Who do you think you are? Lol. I KNOW I am not a teenager anymore who ever gave you THAT idea? ! And I am PROUD of reaching 39 you cyber bully!

I am NOT expecting a perfect man, where else did I say that as well? ? ! In fact I even dated a MAMA'S BOY/PAPA'S BOY and as embarrassing as it is, even a homeless person, but see, I have a heart, unless you guys who is always trying to ONE UP me just because you're JEALOUS that I know the truth and you didn't come up with it sooner!

I can talk whenever and however I want. You don't OWN me you idiot. And is a FREE COUNTRY with FREE SPEECH last time I checked!

[Sweetsurprize]

@patrick994 I have a heart I mean, unlike you all *

[love_conquers_lust]

Defend it is. Just try not to be defensive. There’s a difference.

So, do you like younger men or not? Quit pussyfooting around the question.

Stubborn old folks. I’m younger than you. My grays are mostly on my balls. I’ve had them since a teenager. They might be blond, I don’t know. It’s a silver mane. Silver balls. Not gilded. That’s AGED, right? NATURE made them that way. Does that make them wise? Should I listen to them? What do you think?

Again, I assumed no such thing. I entertained that you might have. It’s a quibble that I don’t really care about.

4-5 years is reasonable. As you get older, kinda have no choice but to relax age requirements. Pick someone who doesn’t annoy the shit out of you.

I will always take better comprehension. As well as honesty from you. I’m addicted to empowerment and honing my skills.

[love_conquers_lust]

We all have hearts here. It’s just a debate. No one is getting punished. I think you’re doing quite well standing you ground.

That is something dating a homeless guy and a Mama’s boy, Heart WARMING in fact. It gives the rest of us stubborn old folks hope.

[nastyb]

@love_conquers_lust

im not attracted to old men either. even when im in my 40s, i will still try to get a man in his 30s. 30s is when a man is most attractive.

[love_conquers_lust]

@nastyb Your profile says 24…

[Sweetsurprize]

@love_conquers_lust Lol, you really don't get it do you. Your IQ seems questionable. WHEN she reaches that age dumb dumb. She was referring to in the future lmao.

[patrick994]

@nastyb I hope you are still beautiful at 40, to be desired by young people in their thirties you have to be particularly beautiful, an average looking woman at 40 is only good for company.

[nastyb]

@patrick994

there will always be men who prefer older women. you just gotta find them.

i will always find men in their 30s to be most attractive regardless if i am 30 or 60.

[patrick994]

@nastyb Surely there will be men who prefer older women, but you have to be particularly beautiful to please someone younger than you, it's not enough to look average, you have to be very beautiful.

[nastyb]

@patrick994

men like older women for a reason... they like the older look... along with all the maturity, and wisdom that comes with older women.

[love_conquers_lust]

@Sweetsurprize. “i will always find men in their 30s to be the most attractive.”. Am I still a dumb dumb?

I mean, I’m not going to make or ask her sign a blood oath or anything on it. But surely, it’s not my IQ that’s the problem.

You know, there’s an easy way out of this. “ I like guys in their 30s, but I don’t like YOU.”. Have to respect that.

[nastyb]

@love_conquers_lust

there will always be guys in their 30s who like older women. you just gotta know where to find them...

if know this offends you... but its the truth

[love_conquers_lust]

@nastyb What kind of wisdom? Like their sandwiches start to actually taste good?

I’m not really offended. Not all that concerned what EVERY guys choose to do with the biology that I know we all generally share. Too much to track, and don’t generally want to. I’m priority uno for me.

[Sweetsurprize]

@love_conquers_lust Yes you ARE a dumb dumb considering I didn't WRITE that thing you quoted me saying lmao. That was Nastyb saying it. Pay closer attention to who you're insulting will you? ! You are LOSING the argument if you can't even recognize who's saying who lol.

[Sweetsurprize]

@love_conquers_lust And the fact that you are FORCING me to think a certain way or try to change my preferences for what I like in a man shows me you're controlling and manipulative.

[love_conquers_lust]

@Sweetsurprize. “That was Nastyb saying it”. I know. That’s why I quoted it. She said she didn’t like older guys. Then she said she will ALWAYS like guys in their 30s, who are OLDER than her at 24. She hasn’t clarified either. I wasn’t insulting anyone, I was trying to point out what was said. I did it without insulting anyone, unlike you calling me a dumb dumb.

I can’t force you to think a certain way or change your preferences, I don’t want that. I don’t want to control you. The final choice is yours. I want you to think. I can only voice my opinion in hopes you’ll reconcile it with yours, or vice versa.

[love_conquers_lust]

@Sweetsurprize. I’m surprised you didn’t jump on the sandwich comment. THAT was pushing insulting, but it’s not an insult to some women who like to cook. I’d like to think I’m a better griller now than I was ten years ago.

[nastyb]

Because of patriarchy.

Notice how single women are shamed while single men aren't. A single woman is called a crazy lady with 50 cats while a single man is called a bachelor.

Notice how women who dont want children are shamed while it is completely ok for men who dont want children.

Take a look at how single moms are shamed while men who abandon their kids are never looked down upon

A career woman who wants to make a lot of money is called "materialistic" while a man who wants to make a lot of money is called "ambitious"

It all boils down to Patriarchy and sexism

[Asker]

All you said is true, I sometimes just hate being a woman.

[BoopBoopBeep]

Where are you at/from? Women who don't want children are shunned? Over 20% of people are childfree by choice. Most of the women I know don't want kids.

Women who do a shite job taking care of their kids get government assistance. The men go to jail. As they should, sure, but let's start putting worthless mothers in jail too.

[Asker]

@BoopBoopBeep I want to get married, have kids but no one wants me because I am not beautiful or 14

[ManOnFire]

@nastyb This is all stuff white-feminists have their panties in a bunch over.

[nastyb]

@BoopBoopBeep

its way too common that men abandon their kids. I have known so many grown adults who tell me that their father left when they were kids or they are not in touch with their father at all. or they never knew their father.

I have also known many dudes who tried to have sex with me without a condom on a first date.

Its unacceptable what men try to do and are able to get away with.

[BoopBoopBeep]

Yep. They abandon their kids. Mine abandoned my mom and me. Somehow I managed to not need twenty years of therapy about it and went on to be a successful member of society. Should they bring a kid into the world and not support it? No. Will they continue to, yes, just as women will continue to do shite things as well.

Women try to get away with quite a bit as well I assure you. People are shite on both sides of the aisle.

Perhaps to not be in a position where they can try to have sex without a condom may be prudent. There are some tricky ones out there, to be sure.

[nastyb]

@BoopBoopBeep

women don't get away with it. because if your mom decided to abandon you too, you wouldn't be alive today.

[BoopBoopBeep]

Women get away with sitting around on the couch and getting the state to pay for their kid in the form of welfare, TANF, WIC, and a host of other available resources. There's zero accountability to western women, it's always someone else's fault.

[nastyb]

@BoopBoopBeep

your mother would've been there for you even if she didn't get WIC, welfare.

I was raised by 2 parents and I grew up on food stamps, medicaid.

it has absolutely nothing to do with money, your mom just didn't make enough

[nastyb]

@BoopBoopBeep

and trust me when i say this... your mom making minimum wage and having a child to support is one of the worst most stressful situations anyone would ever put themselves into.

that couple hundred dollars of food stamps doesn't make up for it

[BoopBoopBeep]

@nastyb
My mom didn't apply for any government assistance. As a first generation American... that's "not what you do." She worked up to three jobs, put herself through community college, then university, for a real degree not some silly "gender studies" or "philosophy of film" degree, then sold real estate for a while before becoming a social worker. The last time my mom made minimum wage she was 17.

[nastyb]

@BoopBoopBeep

You should be thankful your mom didn't abandon you like your dad did

If women were to abandon their kids like men did, there would be no next generation

[BoopBoopBeep]

@nastyb
She's a great lady for sure. That's why I made it a point to get her set up in retirement.

[nastyb]

@BoopBoopBeep

its really fucked up how you say western women never take accountability for their kids... when they're the only ones who raised you.
you wouldn't even be here without them

[BoopBoopBeep]

@nastyb
It's not my fault that the education system has failed to teach you what a generalization is.

[nastyb]

@BoopBoopBeep

you sound ungrateful.

maybe your mother should've abandoned you when you were a child and just let you starve to death.

[nastyb]

@BoopBoopBeep

it doesn't fucking matter if mothers are on welfare or not. just cuz your mother was on welfare, it doesn't mean she didn't care about you. it just means she didn't make enough money

i was raised by my parents on welfare. it didn't mean my parents birthed me just so they could get welfare.

[BoopBoopBeep]

@nastyb
No dear, try to follow. I already said my mom never applied for any government assistance because she was a new American and "that's not what you do." I CAN agree with you on this one: " just cuz your mother was on welfare, it doesn't mean she didn't care about you." Yes. Yes that is true. Nobody was arguing that point though, so it's also true that Earth is the third planet.

How am I ungrateful when I'm the one that bought my mom an early retirement through an annuity I funded?

[nastyb]

@BoopBoopBeep

it doesn't matter if she was on or never on govt assistance.

fact is.. . even if she was on government assistance, she wouldn't have abandoned you.

[BoopBoopBeep]

@nastyb
Agreed. Nobody is debating that. What argument are you (poorly) making?

[nastyb]

@BoopBoopBeep

you don't even understand the center of the topic being discussed.

nobody gives two shits if your mother was on government assistance or not. its not a economics course.

the topic was about parents abandoning their kids

[BoopBoopBeep]

@nastyb
No I don't understand because you're jumping around and I've had to correct you twice on factual accuracy.

My mom didn't abandon me, my father did. Those are both irrefutable facts. So given that, what are you trying to convince me to believe?

[nastyb]

@BoopBoopBeep

you were just shitting on single moms.

single moms are the saviors. without them, so many people wouldn't have reached adulthood

[BoopBoopBeep]

@nastyb
I shite on everyone individually, not as groups. I know plenty of junkie single moms that sold their kids off to pedophiles to know they aren't all saviors. Sorry, love, life isn't that cut and dry.

[Rei13]

The men on these types of websites or YouTube channels who only place value on how young a woman is or if she is super beautiful is not reflective of every man in society. Your value as a partner is not completely dependent on that. While I do think men on average tend to be more shallow when it comes to appearance and that the prettier you are the better you might be treated on average, that isn’t the only factor. Some will see a woman in her mid-twenties as less valuable, her thirties, forties etc but you can be those ages and still be desirable. Heck you might even attract younger men. Just take care of yourself and surround yourself with those that truly value you

[Asker]

Are you sure? The men around me say the same thing, including my father which just breaks down my self esteem. He always comments on other womens looks and shame them for their age, which makes me insecure because I am not beautiful, and I know that in not many years I will be considered too old according to men. (if God allows me to get older)
Of course it's not the ONLY important factor, I can agree with you on that. But it comes FIRST, it is the most important traits men look for in a woman (physical beauty and youth). Of course if a guy is able to score a woman that is gorgeous and young but also is intelligent, kind, etc he'll value those qualities as well. But he would never ever be with a woman who has good charachteristics but isn't under 25 and not that beautiful.
See my point? I probably worded it wrong. Beauty and youth are not the only important qualities, but they are the most important ones that a woman has to check off. The other qualities are just bonuses.

Of course if you're an older woman you can attract men, but they only want to sleep with you. They do not want marriage or commitment to you, only sex. I hate that men are like this, and not only that but they shame women for having sex before marriage while they literally do the same thing, and then they demand a young, beautiful virgin who hasn't even had her first kiss yet while they are neither young, virgins or that beautiful themselves. They do not even display any good charachteristics.

[RingOfFire]

@Rei13

I completely agree with you. And that is a critical point. Youth and looks are two factors men value... but NOT the ONLY factors. That's a critical point.

[Rei13]

@RingOfFire exactly! Like they do play a role but it’s not the only thing

[Rei13]

Sometimes the people in our lives are not the kindest and make you feel bad about something that you shouldn’t feel bad over. Especially when it’s your parent, they should make you feel like you’re perfect the way that you are. You’re still very young and once you’re an adult you will meet new people and spread your wings. My mom met my dad when she was 27 or 28 and he is only a year older than her. I met my significant other when I was 30. I was morbidly obese for my height (so unattractive to most people) but he took the time to go to the gym with me, we bonded/started dating and I lost the weight. We’ve talked about marriage as well. I know some people that met their person when they were a teenager to early twenties, others not until they were mid-thirties +. There is no real timeline on when you will meet your person and you don’t lose value just because you’re a little older or you kissed a few boys. Life happens to everyone. You’re probably beautiful even if you don’t see it in yourself, we are our own worst critics and you’re the harshest on yourself when you’re young. Just because other people are pretty, doesn’t mean that you are not.

[Effably]

I disagree. Hear me out for a second.

Women's intrinsic value to men is based on beauty and alike, with some bonuses for being women. That part is shallow, yes.

Any value you earn outside of that you still benefit from and will be respected for. But without being attractive, attraction is not a likely outcome. You still earn respect, admiration and alike. It is just that, in my view, women often do not recognize being valued in those ways. But I definitely value accomplished women for their accomplishments, I am just not attracted to it. The attitude that got them there? Maybe. But the deed in itself, nah.

If all you allow yourself to see is how attractive we think you are and not if you're the one person we cherish and trust most in the world as a friend or mentor? Well, we will seem shallow.

[Asker]

Oh, maybe you're right. Either way it sucks, women can be attracted to ugly men if they have good qualities and achievements but men can't.

[Effably]

We can. Although it is less likely, I agree. Achievements again is a non-factor. We do care about who you are! But we generally care very little about who other people think you are.

[magiusX26]

you are slightly misguided in this assesment young lady. more often than notn the "beauty" comes from the youth part. the youth is a desired quality due to the biological facts of fertility and "shelf life" of that. women are born with a sex number of eggs that deplete as they age and their ability to sucessfully procreate healthy offspring decays with age too. so a woman's optimal time for motherhood is roughly between 20 and 30. a sort of knowledge of this is biologically ingrained into the men along with a basic funtional need/desire to procreate to keep our species going, so therefore desire fertile women the most. this is most of why women are born with an intrinsique societal value that goes down as she ages where as men must build their societal value as they age. tgings such as building the various forms of power (muscle, prestige, knowledge, skills, connections, wealth) to provide (a lot of why the money side) and protect his mate and offspring.

[Asker]

I wish I was born a man

[Asker]

If I were at least my wife would stay with me and I didn't have to worry about finding someone before a certain age

[magiusX26]

"my wife would stay with me" these days, that is very doubtful.

[Asker]

Traditional women would

[magiusX26]

on paper yes, yet i see even those leave too. also, traditional women are a bit of a rare breed these days.

[Asker]

Not true, men on the other hand will always cheat, if not physically they will in their minds. Men are worse

[magiusX26]

welp, thus ends the convo as you said "all men cheat"to a man who has never cheated or even wanted to cheat even when presented with the opportunities.

[DextroShade]

Men and women value different things: men value youth and beauty while women value height, status, and resources. Yet only men's preferences are shamed as "shallow" so I say nearly all women are gold-digging whores. If you bitter skanks think that men should be fine dating old, fat, ran-through women then you should be willing to date short homeless drug addicts.

Also, you are under 18, WTF are you complaining about when you are about to be in your prime? Are you planning on throwing away your best years and dying alone out of solidarity with the spinsters?

[Asker]

Am I in my prime in my teens? What. Fuck it's so over for me bro, I barely have any time left to find someone. I'm not beautiful, my face is just ugly.
If that's how you want to look on it then sure. Difference is that a man can achieve that through hard work. Even if he's old he can still get women.
However a woman can't get younger and if you're not born beautiful then you'll never be beautiful because your genetics determined your whole future.
"throwing away my best years" you're telling me I am in my best years now as a minor and that I will be undesireable as fast as I hit my 20's?
I DON'T WANT TO DIE ALONE, but no man fucking wants me despite me being young because all men want is beauty. I've been told by many guys that they like my personality and that I have good values (virgin, traditional, wants to be a stay at home wife, religious, wants many kids etc) but that they only see me as a friend or they just told me I am ugly (and I'm not fat, my face is just ugly. I have long hair, dres modestly and feminine, take care of myself etc).
I look for a man everyday, I feel so stressed and in pressure everyday to find someone because I know my time is so fucking limited and that I have less that 5 years to find someone. Every fucking man rejects me. No man that is religious like me, that would suit for a good father, loyal and has morals wants me. The only men who want me are autistic old men (old enough to be my grandpa) that are married with grandkids my age that only want to hookup with me. Those are the only men who want me.

I try to improve everyday, and I focus more on growing my knowledge, intelligence, personality, being feminine but nothing works. No man wants me and I realized it's because of my looks, so I'm planning on getting plastic surgery but I don't even know if I'll ever have the money for it. And if I ever do I will be past my prime.

[Asker]

Men with high bodycounts can sure go date ugly, old, fat, ran through women. Dating is disgusting, marriage is the best option.
I'm just tired of men degrading women because of their age and beauty. I think having more than 1 body count is disgusting, I don't think men should settle for ran-through women. Not fat women either since they are unhealthy.
But it just makes me so sad that all men, any age, any race, any religion or belief, any type of personality, all demands a girl aged 14-19 that is beautiful.
What the fuck am I supposed to do, an ugly girl who will be old soon? I can't find anyone simply because of the way that I look. I'm not ran through, fat, or anything like that.

[DextroShade]

First, I said you were about to be in your prime, meaning 18-24. A lot of girls who don't look good as teenagers grow up to be hot, so to maximize the chances of that you must get as fit as possible, don't smoke, and definitely don't get tattoos or piercings. When 2 in 3 women are obese you are automatically in the top half just for not being fat. Preserve your value and feminity and when you are older men WILL notice you.

[Asker]

That is a lie, no one notices me now and no one will. I will just kill myself at this point. Having a prime of only 6 years is worthless anyway, and if I were to get married in my prime and did look attractive the man would lust after other women and cheat in his thoughts or physically once I'm past my prime

[DextroShade]

People are what they are, yes men will always have a wandering eye but that doesn't mean they will cheat or leave you. Most men can't even get a date, let alone cheat; 1 in 3 men are either virgins or haven't had sex in the past year. Women also initiate 80% of divorces. I don't want to hear YOU, who hasn't entered her prime yet, complain about rejection to MEN. Rejection is the default for us.

[Asker]

I have been rejected over 10 times and men don't even look my way. Don't speak for me.

I hate men with wandering eyes, they can go peg themselves

[EmyyWolf]

Girl don’t listen to this guy. He think everyone should be religious.
He’s black and ugly hence why he has a distorted view of women. A distorted view of the beings who brought him to life.
Don’t even bother with this undesirable 😂
He’s never seen his Daddy’s face.

https://youtu.be/sXYlq5LgzqU?si=sdhiZIvI8mdyPo-j

[DextroShade]

@EmyyWolf I am a white guy who was raised in an intact nuclear family and i am not religious, you are really bad at this.

[EmyyWolf]

Prove it

[DextroShade]

@EmyyWolf I don't need to prove anything to you, random feminist thot on the internet.

[EmyyWolf]

Oh ok then you’re a lyi’n ass little cunt. 🤥
Broke black guy with a pot to piss in, or a window to throw it out off.



LMAO!! 😂😂 You a “KANG 👑 WITH NO KINGDOM”. You a broke loser. Ann you’re dying a virgin.

No female is letting you go inside. HELL NAHH

[EmyyWolf]

@DextroShade
That’s why I keep telling you 😂. You crack something. Go fuck something befor you end up touching little kids, while wearing a Cheeto-Smelling Barney suit. 😂

[DextroShade]

@EmyyWolf you will die alone and be eaten by your cats.

[EmyyWolf]

You fuck something yet? You’re like 38.
I don’t know who da fuck is gonna let you go in….
But shit… I mean you seriously gonna have to go talk to some milfs. Some single mamas. B4 you end up in prison for talking to little snotty kids

😂😂😂😂😂

[EmyyWolf]

@DextroShade

38 my guy!! 38!! 😂😂😂
Tik-Tok Tik-Tok Tik-Tok ….
Your loosing testosterone by the minute , and erectile dysfunction is on its way… 😂

[EmyyWolf]

@DextroShade
Isn’t 40 grandpa age? 🫵😂 OH MY GOD.

I should be the one asking:
“Where the fuck is your grandchildren?
“Where the fuck is your cats and dogs?
In a just a couple years you’re gonna have to purchase a tombstone 🪦…
“He lies, a high value man”

🫵😂 !!

[DextroShade]

@EmyyWolf I can bust nuts and father children until the day I die, I don't really see your point. Unlike you, I have plenty of time. God damn you are stupid and pathetic.

[EmyyWolf]

😂😂😂😂 I can fuck until the day I die to the fuck. My parents both had me at 48. 🖕🖕🖕

And if I ever choose to poop a brat. I’ma do it at 48 too. 🖕🖕🖕🖕😂😂😂😂😂

[EmyyWolf]

@DextroShade
And also if you make a baby over 50, that baby could be deformed. LMAOOO!!!
Old sperm is useless.😂😂😂😂

[DextroShade]

@EmyyWolf wrong again, Al Pachino just fathered a healthy child and he's in his 80's. You are not going have a healthy kid at 48 any more than I will win the PowerBall jackpot. The fact your parents had you at that age explains why you are so retarded.

[EmyyWolf]

Are you Al Pachino?
Exactly. And how are you gonna f-k if no one is looking your way? Yeah.. f-king over 50 is something that a Chad , Brad, Tyrone, deserve. Not you. You don’t fit in that category. You’re excluded. You don’t QUALIFY.

Here you go Brad Pitt Al Pachino. 😂😂
“ Advancing paternal age also has been associated with increased risk of genetic disease. Our exhaustive literature review has demonstrated negative effects on sperm quality and testicular functions with increasing paternal age.”

[jennifer_bloom]

I know ugly people who are married to rich people and treated like diamonds, not only by their husbands but also by their friends and family and extended family and in laws. Beauty is not everything and a guy that marries you for your body might be an evil person or an abuser.

[Asker]

I don't need someone that's rich, I just want a loyal man who only has eyes for me, that is religious like me, with the same values as me and a compatible personality to mine to love me. He can be ugly, short and poor. I don't care. I just want to be married to someone that genuienly loves me.

[patrick994]

What are you saying? The truth is the exact opposite, we guys are constantly under the aesthetic dictatorship of girls, we have to be at least 6 feet tall, have a muscular physique, have a pretty face, nice thick hair without a receding hairline, have a large penis, etc.

moreover, we have to know what to do, be resourceful, know how to dress, etc.

[Asker]

Not true, how often do you see beautiful women with ugly men? ALL THE TIME. How often do you see the opposite? Like once every 25 years?
Sure, there are standards for men as well but that is an overexxagoration. Most women don't have those standards.

[patrick994]

Look, I don't know where you live, but in Italy most couples are: he's very handsome and she's average, or even below, I assure you that the girls are pretentious too,

[Asker]

Okay, sure, let me know if they get married or if they are just hooking up

[Anonymous]

True that attractive girls have more value for sex, but not for every other aspect. I staid with both hotties and ugly girls (which I didn't find ugly, by the way, because I liked their personality).

Please consider that men are naturally shallow becuase they want young girls for their fertility. My girlfriend is 20 and I have a lot of time for having children. If she was of my age, we should hurry.

It's everything mostly like you say, but the exceptions are possible and not so rare. True, it's better to be a man, but being a woman is not always a problem. My gfs (bith ugly and hot) can confirm.

[Asker]

You didn't marry any of those ugly women though, you just fucked them. Men won't marry ugly women, just fuck them. But they will sure marry beautiful young girls.

[Opinion Owner]

I replied to you because i thought you wanted advise. I hope it could help you

[ImalwaysrightOK]

Yeah ok because women are so virtuous and always choose the nicest, most deserving guys instead of dirtbags that pump and dump because they can. It's well known women are sexually attracted to only about 10% of men, then after they've slept their way through their 20s, decide to settle with a provider.

[Asker]

Bro no, I am a virgin saving myself for marriage, I'm traditional, I want to be a stay at home wife, I'm a religious tradtional roman catholic, I want to have many kids, get married young but literally no one wants me except for men old enough to be my grandpa that are already married, autistic and have grandkids my age that wants to hook up with me. That's the only men that want me.
I don't chase Chads, I know it's pointless because I'm ugly and most Chads are scumbags, but turns out both ugly guys, average guys and hot guys are all the same. SCUMBAGS!
I have literally had a crush on a giuy that was younger than me, shorter than me by over 10 cm, overweight and just not physically attractive, but I chased him because I liked his personality. He said he liked my personality too, but he didn't like me in that way because of my looks. Turned out he lliked my sister because he thought she was beautiful. (he told me)
I don't fucking chase Chads, I don't care if he's ugly, poor and shorter than me, I just want a man that is loyal that only has eyes for me, is religious like me, prefferably a virgin, traditional, would suit for being a good father and has a compatible personality to mine. I don't think that's too high standards, I just want a lifelong partner that I can worship God together with.

[ImalwaysrightOK]

If you're the type of girl that you say you are, you shouldn't have any problem finding a loyal husband. About 90% of young women nowadays exploit their desirability and attractiveness in their teens and 20s, then expect a decent guy to want to marry them after they've been with other guys. Not gonna happen. If you are loyal and a decent girl, there will be no shortage of guys under 35 wanting you as a wife.

[Asker]

If I shouldn't have any trouble then why did I get rejected everytime? Why do no men want me?
All men say (or at least think but don't say it out loud) women over the age of 25 are ugly, old and worthless because they want "youth" and "beauty". If you're not 14-24 they look upon you as worthless. If you're under 25 you're only a sex object existing for them.
The only thing they want and value is beauty and youth, if you don't have that you're worthless to men

[Anonymous]

it's ridiculous. many guys on here expect women to be a virgin, pretty, untouched, no baggage (aka an ex), under the age of 25, and blissfully ignorant as hell lol all the while, they are allowed to do whatever and have sex as much as they want without judgement. it's unrealistic and it needs to stop.

[Asker]

SO TRUE! Men of all ages, all pasts, race etc ALL demand a young, beautiful virgin with morals, loyalty and traditional valuesnunder the age of 25 , usually a teenager even when they themselves are not loyal, has had sex before, old, ugly etc.

[RingOfFire]

See...

The question keeps coming up but the answer is simple. Why does society value women for their youth and looks and men for their wealth and strength?

[RingOfFire]

It's not men who are shallow, it's nature.

[Asker]

I wish I was a man. At least men can build up their value, women can't. They are either born with it or they are not. In my case, I was not born with it.

[RingOfFire]

If you think of it as absolute value then yes, it is more of a fixed value for women than men since some of what men are valued for is, as you say can be controlled. And I am sure that is a disheartening feeling for women.

But an important thing to remember is that this is how *society* values men and women. It isn't how loved ones value men and women. And it is more important how your loved ones value you than society values you because they are the ones that really matter. So my recommendation (not just to you but to everyone) is to focus on loved ones, friends and family, and you will be the most valuable person in their lives. That's the value that really counts.

[Asker]

I just want a lifelong partner that's it, but it hurts knowing I can not and will never have that because of my looks.

[RingOfFire]

You cannot say that because you don't know. Again, it isn't important how "society" views you. Individuals don't necessarily place the same value on looks. I am sure there are a lot of boys/men who would absolutely love you for who you are including your looks. There is no one size fits all with love or attraction. EVERYONE can find love. It takes time. You are too young now. It will come. You just have to be patient and not give up the dream. Many many people who think it will never happen suddenly find out one day that it does.

[Asker]

I'm not too young, I am literally past the age group men want (which is 14) I am about to turn 20 soon

[RingOfFire]

It says under 18 on your post. But 20 is still a baby too! Don't let it worry you. I'm betting the right guy will come along... and sooner than you think.

[Asker]

I just picked a random birthdate when I made my account.

Studies show that men find girls age 14 to be most attractive, and after 25 it's over for a woman.

I don't think I'll find anyone tbh

[RingOfFire]

That's not true. I have known a lot of men in my life and they found their partners at all different ages. Lots and lots of people get together in their 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s, 70s and even older. And they are not marrying 14 year olds!

[Asker]

Because it is illegal, if it were legal tho men would marry 14 year olds.

I wish I will find a decent man. Thank you for being so kind, you are very different from the majority of men, it gives me hope. Can you pray for me?

[RingOfFire]

I would pray for you, but you don't need my prayers because trust me when I tell you... as long as you are open to a relationship, and don't shut yourself off the it because you think it will never come... it WILL come. There are just as many lonely men out there as women. That's the beauty of love... ANYONE can find it if their heart is open.

[Asker]

What if I'm old?

[RingOfFire]

I'll tell you something else...
I have seen MANY women in my life... and many when I was your age who COMPLETELY underrated their own looks. Your self image is mostly made up of psychological things not visual reality. Maybe you have had hardships in your life and it has given you feelings of insecurity about yourself including you desirability to men. Maybe you just don't see yourself as others do. The important thing to do is BELIEVE IN YOURSELF because if you don't you will push people away.

[RingOfFire]

I have even seen women who thought they were ugly who to me looked incredibly beautiful.

[RingOfFire]

I was SHOCKED that they did not see it.

[Asker]

Not true, I posted my face on reddit for an honest opinion and every single one said I am ugly and that I am a 3/10 or a 4/10

[RingOfFire]

Means nothing. You cannot evaluate yourself that way. Looks are a complex thing. Men see a woman's looks as part of the whole person. A man who loves you will think you are the most beautiful woman in the world. I myself have had relationships with women who at first didn't seem that physically attractive to me, but after time... I fell in love with them and thought they were the most beautiful I have ever seen. It's a thing... really.

[Sharkstealth]

I have always liked artistic women. I think that statement goes both ways. If it didn't we wouldn't see so many ggb threesomes. It's common now for girls to only want to sleep with a few guys. A girls girlfriend will sleep with her friends boyfriend rather than find her own guy.

[Asker]

Oh ok.

[Anonymous]

That show it is. Our beauty is the most valuable stuff about us, he can be lucky we were born with it. Men have nothing, they have to earn it with status later in life and if they don't they are low value men. We all have something but at least we just have to maintain it

[Asker]

What about women like me who weren't born beautiful? I can't ern my value like men can.

[Opinion Owner]

Why do you not feel beautyful?

[Apple1996]

Some men are very shallow and only value youth and beauty. I personally ignore those men. They aren't worth my time

[Asker]

So do I. I'd rather be single than be with a man like that; not that they want me anyway since I don't have beauty.

[Apple1996]

It's crazy cuz men don't realize that they are scaring away women for having these standards

[Anonymous]

Take a look at this site an all the "how do I look" and "who's prettier" questions on this site.

I mean it would be EASY to blame men. But unfortunately women are just as guilty for this.

Band together as a gender. Don't diet, don't shave, don't wear makeup, decide you're complete uninterested in sex (and stick to it). And see how men react.

Do you think you can get all women on-board?

[Asker]

Look through history, if a woman was valuable it was because she was young and beautiful. Just because some women are vain attention sluts doesn't mean every man should treat every woman a certain way based on the physical.

[Opinion Owner]

Actually that's not true. Historically speaking women came with dowry's because women gave you no advantage because they had no power and didn't own land. Like it or not historically speaking we're all just pawns.

[ManOnFire]

Women are still doing the same thing with their own gender, and women base their value on sex and the ability to have sex. Women are bothered by what men think or say, until it benefits them.

[Asker]

Just fuck men and women, they can all go fuck themselves in the ass. Everyone nowadays are so fucking shallow

[AmeerX]

It is true but these are societal constructs. Do you want to go against them? Be my guest. Men have to prove their worth. Woman don't have to do the same. So, what's the problem?

[Asker]

I have no worth because I'm not beautiful. I was born ugly, my genetics determine half of my value. I'm young, but not beautiful.
What do you mean be my guest?
At least men can build their value, ugly women like me can't.

[AmeerX]

What if I told you that you are going to metamorph into a beautiful girl someday?
You are too young right now. In your 20s you will be beautiful and beautiful till you are you 40s.

So you should not worry what will happen to you.

[Asker]

NOt true, I am soon to turn 20, my face is just ugly. My facial structure won't change, the only change I'll have is looking older. That's why I'm saving for plastic surgery so that maybe I can get married.

Men want teens and girls in their early twenties. After 25 it's over bro

[AmeerX]

🤣 if you get plastic surgery you are sure to lessen your chances. Do yourself a favore and get an anon rate in the hoe do I look session and see the ground reality

[Asker]

I already have before, people rated me a 3 or 4 at best out of 10. Everyone has told me to get plastic surgery

[AmeerX]

Plastic surgery will make it worse. Don't do it

[Asker]

It's either plastic surgery or never getting married

[AmeerX]

You are being pessimistic

[normalice]

Because men have all the money so men assign all the value.

[Asker]

They can go fuck themselves in the ass.

[normalice]

No. That's half the problem. If men could fuck themselves in the ass they'd never leave their moms basement let alone bother anyone ever again.

[Asker]

Then peg yourself with a dildo just fuck off if you are shallow

[normalice]

It's not the same.

Oh, and keep in mind I'm not condoning any of this. Just describing it..

[LiamJHayden]

I'm weird. My one physical thing is if she is obese, and that is because I'm a runner and very active. I also have always been attracted to women who are older than I am.

[Asker]

That is strange

[msc545]

United States men are not valued for anything except their money.

[Asker]

And women are not valued for anything more than their youth and beauty. If you are not born beautiful it is over for you as a woman. At least men can build up their value.