Guys, what can be the end result of a guy bonding with a female during a tragic even that has happened to him?

[Anonymous]

He approached me and told me I was beautiful. I didn’t pay much attention to him. Recently he lost his grandfather and he opened up to me about everything…what bothers him, what upsets him…everything. He also thanks me for listening to him and giving him a different perspective. He tells me he doesn’t have anyone to talk to.

i like him but I’m afraid of getting attached to him just for him to decide to be with someone else after everything gets better for him.

[Anonymous]

He confided in you during a very rough moment in time, and he also called you beautiful. Do these two things indicate romantic interest yet? Not exactly, so don’t invest and set expectations until you know what’s going on. Instead, figure out what he’s looking for right now and if he has good intentions then cool, go ahead and explore your feelings. Until you have that knowledge though then don’t get all in your feelings just yet. There’s no need to become attached just because he’s been kind, especially when you don’t know what he wants from you, if anything.

[Asker]

Yeah, these are my exact thoughts too. I was thinking of just listening to him whenever he needs someone to talk to and checking on him occasionally but more so letting him reach out when he wants.

[Opinion Owner]

That sounds like it would work in his favor but what about yours? Seems like you’re interested in more than just being an occasional ear for him to vent, so why not make it known?

[Asker]

I’m afraid of rejection or getting m6 feelings hurt. I don’t want to open up to him just for him to end up talking to another girl when everything is back to normal.

[Opinion Owner]

Rejection sucks a lot but “no” is not going to break you and if it does, well then you’ve got some bigger things to work on, love. As for him opening up, I’m not sure that’s something you should feel hurt if he does with someone else. The thing is you strike me as someone who doesn’t openly share with people. You may be a bit quiet, guarded, and if you share some personal information then there’s a lot of value in that. There’s a certain level of trust established with you and that person and sharing important aspects of your past means a lot for you. Well, some people don’t have that same approach. If you are an at least decent listener then you will hear all their venting, personal info or not. So for all you know, that can be how he operates and there isn’t much value to him sharing things with you. He doesn’t have to be a blabbermouth ranting to anyone who will listen but sharing important things doesn’t have the same value for him that it does for you. So if he shares with another woman, until you know how much sharing matters to him then don’t think he’s doing some exclusive gesture or using you at this time. Does that make sense?

[Asker]

That makes perfect sense and I couldn’t agree more with you. Thank you so much 😊

[In_Trance]

A disaster. Trauma bonding is never a good thing