What does he mean by “no you’re not on my time?”?

[Anonymous]

On a date …. We were talking about what we wanted ect… I teased him and said I’m on whatever time you’re on.. basically meaning I’m doing whatever he's doing…

how he said was telling… he said I’m not on his time and chuckled sarcastically

[Oliverlogan263]

Um, that's kinda weird sis. When you said you were on his time, you were just playing around right? So his response seems unnecessarily harsh.

The way I see it, there's a couple possibilities for what he meant:

1. He doesn't want you tagging along with whatever he's doing all the time. Like he wants space to do his own thing without you there.

2. He's not that into you and doesn't want you thinking you can just go along with his schedule/plans whenever. Almost like brushing you off.

3. He's got something to hide or is just a jerk who doesn't want to include you in his life.

None of those seem that great, luv. I'd watch out - that "sarcastic chuckle" is kinda a red flag that he doesn't respect you. On the first date too? Yikes.

I'd maybe give him one more chance to explain what he meant, but if he can't give you a straight answer or keeps being shady, I'd say don't waste your time. You can do so much better sis!

[Asker]

I think he means that I’m not doing what he’s doing…. He’s probably talking to a lot of women and I don’t do that

So I’m not on his time

[Oliverlogan263]

Aww man, that sucks if that's what he meant. Sounds like he might be a bit of a player then if he's talking to multiple girls at once. Not cool of him to throw it in your face on a date though.

I wouldn't stress about not being "on his time" if his time is spent juggling a bunch of different women. That just means you're a quality girl who isn't playing games. Nothing wrong with that!

Personally I'd be questioning whether I'd want to keep seeing a dude that so openly chats up lots of others. Feels like you'd always be one of many competing for his attention. Lame.

Don't let him make you feel bad just cause you're choosing to focus your energy on a few people at a time, if any. Keep doing you - someone worthwhile will appreciate you for it. This guy might not be it from the sounds of it. Up to you if you want that kinda drama!

[Asker]

I think men like that are secretly gay I don't know but I got rejected anyway by him cuz we weren’t going to eventually have sx.

[Oliverlogan263]

Well, I don't know if calling someone gay is really fair just because they're acting like a bit of a player. Some guys are just into chatting up a lot of girls for the ego boost or whatever, doesn't necessarily mean anything about their sexuality. That being said, it does seem sketchy that this guy was so openly juggling multiple dates. And saying you're "not on his time" is a jerk move no matter what. As for the sex thing, maybe he just wants a hookup and isn't looking for anything deeper. Not cool of him to lead you on a date if that's all he wanted though. End of the day, don't waste your time worrying about why he acted the way he did - you seem like a nice girl, so just move on to someone who appreciates you and wants the same things as you do in a relationship. Don't settle for lame dudes like this.

[Asker]

That’s why I’m thinking it was genuine idk… he just didn’t like me on the date and tried to sabotage

[Oliverlogan263]

Damn, that really sucks. Nothing worse than going on a date with someone and feeling like they were just trying to sabotage it the whole time. Like if he didn't like you, why'd he even go out with you in the first place? Some people are just jerks I guess.

Don't let it get to you too much though. His behavior says way more about him than it does about you. Maybe he was having an off day or is just insecure deep down. Either way, you seem like a good dude, so forget about this clown and keep your head up.

One bad date doesn't mean you did anything wrong. Just take it as a learning experience - now you'll know the signs if someone isn't genuinely interested next time. And trust me, you'll have way better luck with other girls who will actually appreciate you for who you are. Try not to overthink this lame guy's deal - just move forward and meet someone cool who won't play mind games!

[Oliverlogan263]

You’re a good girl I meant and you’ll have way better luck with other guys I meant

[Asker]

Lol I was like 🤔 😂

[Oliverlogan263]

i bet lol that really sucks he was acting like that then. Super lame and disrespectful of him to try and sabotage it just because he changed his mind or wasn't feeling it. Like have some balls and just be straight up instead of playing games.

Don't even sweat it though, his loss! Any dude would be lucky to go out with a cool girl like you. Hold your head high, you seem sweet and like you know what you want, so you'll find someone way better who appreciates that.

Just do you and have fun hanging with your girls for now. Guarantee this clown will be forgotten about real quick once you meet a real one who treats you with respect. His lame ass isn't worth another thought! Keep shining sis 👊

[TurkKadirMisiroglu]

Eğer seninle dalga geçiyorsa aranıza biraz mesafe koyun. Mümkünse hayatından çık.

[TurkKadirMisiroglu]

If he's making fun of you, keep some distance between you. If possible, get out of his life.