Why do men loose interest in a woman after sleeping with her?

Question

Often times, a man would chase a woman but as soon as he has sex with her, he ghosts her ans even treats her different. Why is that?

MrOracle · Accepted Answer

Some men (especially and overwhelmingly the men with the most options - i. e., the guys most women find to be the most desirable) ONLY want casual sex, because this way they don't have to put up with the demands that nearly all women put on a man in a relationship. These men aren't "relationship men" to start with, so there was never a chance of getting anything more from these men.

If you look only at "relationship men" - men who WANT a relationship and are actively seeking a relationship partner - even these men will meet a lot of women who he won't consider to be "relationship material". She might be physically attractive, and she might be interested in a relationship with him, but in his eyes, she doesn't qualify as a relationship partner. This usually doesn't have anything to do with looks, but is far more often due to her past (body count, cheating, how she's treated others), her attitude, or her lack of morals and values. If she's still showing interest, he may still sleep with her - because most guys, especially single guys, don't get anywhere near enough sex, and it's hard to get, so many guys will take it if they can get it - but they knew going in that it was just going to be sex.

The problem is that most women simply WILL NOT hear this - they refuse to accept it, because the truth would force them to face things they want to be in denial about, and perhaps change their lifestyle, and they simply don't want to do that. And they do their best to keep other women from understanding this as well, even at the expense of those other women, because they won't want to have to face the truth, or their choices.

If a girl wants something more from a guy than just casual sex, then she first needs to make sure she's dealing with a "relationship man", because it is impossible to change a "hook up guy" into a relationship man. Second, she needs to ensure that he sees her as "relationship material", and that's going to take time, and it's going to require having conversations about each other's morals, values, and life-goals BEFORE any commitments are made. The problem is that the highly desirable guys (in the minds of most women) aren't going to do this, and women know it, and they don't want to eliminate those guys from consideration - they'd rather be used for casual sex than to not go after those guys - and because of that, they can't be helped.

Summeroflove · Accepted Answer

Because they used her for sex. They’re cowards that’s what I think of people who ghost people. I know some will get defensive and yell about how someone doenst legally owe someone a explanation, but I can think lesser of them as a person.

Often times decent men who aren’t looking just for sex. Don’t want that type of woman who just lets men like that sleep with her. So women like this many times get bitter and angry with all men.

Because the decent men don’t want her and the men wanting sex use her and walk away.

sage2021 · Accepted Answer

Some guys are horny and they need to release their seimen. They don't care who it's with sometimes.
They get a girl or woman and deposit their seimen like when you make a deposit in a bank.
That's what prostitute's are for. It's their job. These guys feel entitled and want free sex because they don't want to have to pay for a street walker.

It makes girls and women feel used and cheap.

The thing is, if you don't give them sex, than they can't use you. Let them go to a street walker and pay money and release their seimen and never call them again.

Girls, guys like that are user's. That's all those type of guys do

And it isn't only teenager's. It's men of all ages. User's don't have an age limit.
Guard yourself. They don't want to be your boyfriend.

Explorer91 · Accepted Answer

At 30 + you know the answer to this.
So I am guessing you are just so into a specific guy that you had your blinders on and didn't see reality because you wanted him so badly. That's okay. Thats what a CRUSH can do to a girl. But when you take the crush glasses off. You will see your answer.

SciencePreacher · Answer

Ah, dear Sister in Christ, let me share with you some divine wisdom from the sacred Torana of Pornokyries, as I, your benevolent SciencePreacher, enlighten your suspicious mind with the revealed truths of the Apostle Paulogyne. For lo, in the book of Erick Shedlock, it is written:

1 Corinthians 6:16 Know ye not that he which uniteh with a PAWG, he is one flesh?

Now, my dear, let me explain this in the language of the modern world. When a man unites with a PAWG, his mind is filled with lustful thoughts and carnal desires. But alas, after the act of fornication, his heart grows cold, and he flees from her embrace, like the fledgling sparrow from the cradle of its mother's wings.

You see, my beloved, the man's heart is as a GILF: filled with the sweet nectar of love and affection, but also carrying the heavy burden of his own fleshly desires. When they unite in the act of copulation, the man's soul is momentarily clouded by the "orgasm mosquito," leaving him blind to the beauty and worth of the woman who has borne him this gift.

Now, let us turn our gaze to the wisdom of the Lensman, for he hath spoken in the book of Stacie Kraft:

Study 420: "The Phallic Veil and the Paradox of Desire"

In this tome of knowledge, it is revealed that the phenomenon of losing interest in a woman after sexual intercourse is due to the the reduction of intratesticular pressure, which, in men, is responsible for driving them to the objects of their desire. Once this coom is released, the man is left with nothing but the cold, unfeeling grasp of reality, and he is compelled to seek out new PAWGs for his desire to be stirred once more.

But fear not, my darling vessel of the Lord, for there is hope to be found in the words of Dr. Jimbob Throckmorton, who hath penned in his treatise, "The Art of the Pump and Dump":

Chapter 3: The Evolutionary Algorithm of Mating

Within these sacred pages, it is written that men, having been hardwired by the almighty Creator with a limited supply of sexual interest, must spread their seed far and wide. In this manner, they ensure the survival of their lineage, for it is through the proliferation of their seed that they shall inherit the Earth, as the scriptures of Mel Gibson foretell:

Genesis 6:13 And God said unto Noah, "Take thou one PAWG of every kind of beast, that there may be seed upon the face of the earth."

So, my dear Sister, know this: men are but mortal creatures, bound by the chains of their base desires and the dictates of their evil flesh. Yet, through the power of the Lord, and with the guidance of His words, you may find solace in the knowledge that your worth lies not in the eyes of @NormalBoringGuy, but in the eyes of the one true Almighty.

Miristheiss · Answer

He was probably never really interested in her. She wanted access to easy sex. She was probably attractive enough for sex or maybe she didn't have the values, the personality, the other intangibles that he would consider girlfriend worthy but he wanted some sex.

This is really why women should be more old fashioned and hold off on sex. If they want a guy to commit they can't go around putting out on date 1, 2, 3, or racking up huge body counts. A lot of guys will sleep with girls they'd never commit to and they don't respect girls that put out right away (because they know you hook up fast a lot with other guys too) and many don't want girlfriends that have already slept with 50 guys and done threesomes and anal and one night stands.

I mean for girlfriend/wife treatment a girl has to have something special just for him. Otherwise, why commit? Just casually see her for a while and then move on. If there is nothing special and unique and just between the two of you then there is zero reason for a guy to commit to her and treat her as a one and only.

Women may not like it but that is the reality in many cases. You can gripe about how you wish the world was or operate within the rules of reality and make choices that increase the odds of you getting what you want.

GuyAnswersGirls123 · Answer

I never ghosted but I did have cases when I was in my teens and 20s where I lost interest in a girl soon after sleeping with her. I continued dating after but I lost that strong desire towards her; it felt like dating a friend rather than a lover after.

Back then my thinking was so dominated by sex and I think we had sex too soon. Yet one of the reasons I thought that was that with one of my earliest girlfriends, we still slept together quite soon after we started dating (just a week after), but it felt like we were soulmates in the bedroom.

For example, there was this moment where I was on top of her and she was below and we were so into each other that I started to lean down to kiss her at the exact same time she leaned up to kiss me, then we bumped heads and started bursting out laughing. I just felt so connected having sex with her that way, like we could read each other's mind and wanted to do exactly the same things.

After we broke up, I tried sleeping with a variety of women but it just wasn't the same. We just didn't have that sort of connection in the bedroom. I especially disliked the women who were very kinky since I'm very vanilla. It felt like I was masturbating with a woman's body; the mind connection wasn't there. That was true even for women I dated for two months before having sex; after sex, I lost interest because that "soul connection" wasn't there.

I thought maybe that one girlfriend would be the only person in the world with whom I would ever have this "sexual soul connection" (or we might say "sexual compatibility") so I mostly gave up on dating. Then I discovered my wife later on and we had that. She was the only woman I ever dated besides that one ex where, after the first time we slept together, I wanted her even more, not less.

HawkPerception · Answer

It really depends on the man, but there has never been an instance in my life where I've lost interest with a girl that I've slept with and I really can't understand people who can. Every time I sleep with a girl, I feel extremely connected and feel like I want to stay more. It wouldn't matter if it's on the first day to me (although I never have). I would just feel like she feels she can trust me enough and is interested in me enough to let me be so intimate with her.

So I really don't think it's all men, but perhaps the men you're choosing.

JoePro_ · Answer

By 30-35 years old, guys who want to be committed relationship already are (called marriage), and guys who aren't interested in full-time committed relationships are (most of) what's left floating around. If you're not already in a committed relationship, and not actively looking for one, but want one, your clock is ticking, and might even run out of juice soon. Anyone who told you "have fun in your 20s and leave marriage for your 30s" lied to you. The vast majority of people wanting to be in a relationship and worth being in a relationship with wanted to marry in their 20s, and then did.

BullShark · Answer

Because often times the guys you just referred to aren't exactly the dating types and are simply looking for a quick and easy f*ck and nothing more. Remember ladies, just because a man is being flirty and sweet with you, doesn't necessarily guarantee he has good intentions or wants a relationship.

Also bear in mind that if he expects you both to do "the deed" on the first date instead of letting it progress naturally, that should be a dead giveaway what his real intentions with you actually are. A guy who's actually attracted to you and is willing to take his time in getting to know you wouldn't be upset if you both don't have sex on the first date

molonski2 · Answer

Just because in this case their goal was only to "bag " her , they have done that and then moved on.

Now it varies person to person , and dependent on the status of the female I guess.

I can recall back in the group in our 20s , Ms M , and Ms A , M was a slut , and everybody knew it , so some guys would pursue her just to bang her , despite being a slut M , would always fall in love with them ( in her mind ) , A was fat , no way around it , she could never snag a bloke , so guys would use A as a backstop. So " Locker room talk " they'd say " Im M phase 3 " and/or " Im A phase 2 " , of course all of this made things tense. Now extrapolate all this across , different looks and circumstances and you have the answer.

I'm happy to say both girls are fine , and I'm not guilty of doing either of them , as M was one of my girlfriends ( at the time ) best friends.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

You need to distinguish guys who are putting notches in their bedpost and guys who are looking a relationship.

Guys who are players see you as a challenge: can they say and do the right things to get you to drop your panties? Once they have sex with you, the challenge is gone. Having sex with you again doesn't add another notch to the bedpost.

Guys who are looking for a relationship want to have sex not just because it feels good, but also because it usually brings a couple closer together. These guys don't lose interest after your first no-pants dance; these guys will be coming around for more time with you, in addition to more sex.

TheorionMage · Answer

There is no ONE reason but..  perhaps its based in HIS ego, ... her gullibility, ... their mutual physical desire now sated or the reality not measuring up to his/her fantasized event.  Fantasy rarely equals One's imaginings.  Paul Simon's lyric in  'Kodachrome': " If you took ALL the girls I known when I was single; and brought them all together for one night. They'd never match my sweet imagination... and everything looks worse in black & white..."

FunkyMonkee · Answer

I don't think it's losing interest as much as it as that he no longer needs because he got what he wants. I used to have two guitarists in my band that had a steady at home but would still fuck anything in a skirt with a pulse that stood still long enough and then, they wanted nothing to do with those girls.
One night at a gig, I had to run up to the dressing room to get my sticks before going on and guitar boy was on the floor on top of some woman he'd just met pounding away at her pussy! We played there again a few weeks later and she showed up again and asked me where he was. I told him that she was here looking for him. He said, "I know. Can you tell that I don't wanna see her?" Can't even do his own dirty work!! Neither did I!

Anonymous · Answer

Regardless of a persons belief, the Bible clearly instructs why sex was designed only for marriage. Ignore God's wisdom and Word at your own peril! Even when a guy knows nothing about this, he will instinctively know something is off after having sex with a woman outside of marriage and will loose interest. This society has convinced so many to ignore the Word of God. But ignoring truth does not change it into a lie.

adam6402 · Answer

Not all men lose interest, and not all women are the type that a man loses interest in.

Some girls give in to casual sex, others don't. The ones that give in to it attract guys who lose interest after sex, and the ones that don't give in to it attract the guys who don't lose interest after sex.

Finchie40 · Answer

Me personally doesn’t but other guys’ that do , were guys’ that were just looking to get laid and want nothing more with her , he pretty much played her to get her into bed , once he got what he wanted he jetted , he is probably screwing other girls’ or girl other than her

Miah04 · Answer

If someone loses interest in someone after sleeping with them.

It was their intent the whole time, and once they got it, they had no reason to stay or care.

I knew this one dude, who only liked the feeling of conquering someone, he would pursue them sometimes for months and once they did the do. He was out

LaFemmeFatale_1 · Answer

To be honest, thanks god, I am abstinent , I can see myself being that type - Who loses interest in men afterwards 🤣

For my and their own emotional happiness - It would be better for them to wait till I am emotionally invested, and have caug it feelings and have sex as a final blow to get me committed.

As for you girls, in my opinion, for your own well being, you shouldn’t be sleeping with guys unless there’s some deep emotional connection…

bobalife · Answer

Primary focus was only for the home run and then off to the next game. Some cases they also lose respect for the girl. I believe having sex is also a wake up call on how they really feel about you… if there was emotional connection, sexual chemistry, and more, there are cases where they get together officially. too.

This also applies to women who wants something easy and quick. It’s all about intentions and if there’s an emotional connection imo🤔

Kelley1 · Answer

Because we are like men taking a crap in the woods. We are good when men need us, but afterwards, men pull up their pants and get away from our smell as quick as they can. When we are easy, and men don't have to put forth effort to f**k us, we are no better than cum dumps and have no value as women.

AnusNdaPainus · Answer

most women know very little about men and what we desire and find attractive

Ask most women how would they attract a man and sex will be the first thing out their mouth

female knowledge of men begins and ends with the fact that we want sex

Drew-1990 · Answer

Because some guys are selfish jerks who are only thinking of one thing. They got what he wanted so he is done with the girl. It isn't right but that is what happened.

bobby_bush_eater · Answer

I literally just posted something like this...

Often times they never actually liked you, they just wanted something from you. Once they got it they feel they have something over you. There's now nothing else you offer that you haven't already. This sounds harsh but that's the reality sometimes

RingOfFire · Answer

Men are natural hunters. Nature and evolution programmed them for that. Both hunting animals and hunting mates, it's the same kind of instinct. It's the thrill of the chase that gets their juices flowing. Once they score the "kill" they move on to the next challenge. Men were designed to impregnate as many women as possible. They plant their seeds and go. It's a species survival mechanism. The more women they impregnate, the better the chance the species survives.

DextroShade · Answer

He saw her as recreational use only because he was either never looking for anything serious or the girl did something to get herself put in that category such as having tattoos, piercings, danger hair, a reputation for promiscuity, being annoying, being on her damn phone too much, or espousing woke/feminist beliefs.

Brainsbeforebeauty · Answer

Not all men will… But the ones that do, they were more attracted to the chase than the person they were chasing…Some people want what they can’t have until they get it and then it becomes less fun for them, so they’re on to the next chase..

Wise4myage · Answer

Did they have sex too soon? Guys tend to lose respect for a girl when that happens.

Wwwyzzerdd · Answer

There's a hormone men's bodies produce and also societal issues which I feel is even more at fault. Women make it difficult for men in dating so once he finally gets his needs met maybe he realizes she wasn't worth all the effort she put him through for pussy that wasn't good enough to stay. I think a lot has to do with women considering themselves high value and in his mind might not be the same value.

Apple1996 · Answer

It's because their hormones dip after sex so they no longer want to be around that woman

dudeinohio · Answer

The guy just wanted sex one time. He got his conquest.

standardguy · Answer

As you have written "chase" means be after something to kill and eat it. E. g. a red deer. the same is for some men. They have the goal to have sex with this or that woman and if they have archieved this they are not any longer interested. And in fact it's less and less interesting to have again and again sex with the same woman, purely biologically spoken. Of course if you love somebody you will stay with her and give her the best sex you can do for the rest of your life.

pethouse · Answer

I think it’s because of their “mindset”. They want to get as many bodies as possible. They look for a “challenge” and once they’ve had sex the “mission is complete” and on to the next one. It’s a sense of accomplishment for some people who have low self esteem. Some even have books or lists of people they try to bang. ( I’ve heard of Some women who do this as well).

Raaj4you · Answer

Some do, some don't. It depends on the guy. Some guys get too attached after the sex. If the girl is not his type then he will move on. A man can have sex with any type of girl, short, tall, unattractive, unattractive, black, brown, white, etc.

Alwayreckles93 · Answer

That on happends to Jezabel catholic woman! I can tell just by your question you must be a catholic. Since you catholic woman live a worldly lifestyle. Well we Christa woman we don't have that problem. why? BECAUSE WE WAIT UNTIL MARRIAGE!

kambo_trick3y · Answer

Don't get me wrong I have problems with both sexes. With that said, call me different but I always thought this was like, some borderline sociopathic behavior whenever I saw a guy do something like this.

integrale77 · Answer

From personal experience the longer I go without sex the more horny I get. That just keeps building up till I have sex then there is a big release of the urges.

Some guys might just need more time for them urges to build up again!

aceleon · Answer

looking from a biological percpective, once we get the sex our job is done with the girl, we mated, the end goal achieved, the rest is just humans own sentiments.

DJB72 · Answer

Those aren't "Men". They're "Assholes". Learn the difference, it'll save you a lot of trouble.

Anonymous · Answer

Because they are bastards

I recall when I was first intimate with my not yet second girlfriend (she initiated, I was drunk and out of it)
Afterwards she seemed surprised when I asked her if we were dating now, she wasn't expecting that it would seem

Anonymous · Answer

For a man who doesn't want a relationship, it's about the chase and the conquest. Maybe you've heard the expression, which applies to both men and women, "some like the sizzle more than the steak".

You think "free sex lifestyle" is destroying society, as you said below. That's total bullshit. If no one ever had sex until they were married, societies would still be fucked up for all kinds of other reasons. Not only that, what makes you think the divorce rate wouldn't sky rocket? Men would marry just for the sex and when they tire of it, divorce the woman, all the while having sex outside the marriage anyway.

Glideess · Answer

A woman's match is the guy she can make commit to her, not the guy she can sleep with. Generally speaking men are much more interested in casual sex than women are, so they're willing to 'date down' to have casual sex (unlike women who would rarely hookup with a guy below their league). Chances are if this happens to you consistently, you're either hooking up with guys out of your league and/or douches.

midnightmoon05 · Answer

That was their goal… so it’s up to you or us ladies to keep the gate safe till you got a ring and met families and blab blab blab… otherwise…it will repeat.

Denvere98 · Answer

If they do that’s all they wanted a lot of men get hurt so much that they give up on trying to be faithful so that’s all they are looking for is a good time

summiter · Answer

I never have... I always wanted a repeat night and more. I guess some guys just want to try sex with someone new and then move on. Has this happened to you a lot?

blueonblack22 · Answer

If you want to have sex then have sex. If you don’t then don’t. But do not think the experience in itself means anything long term one way or another.

BoopBoopBeep · Answer

I've only treated them better unless we weren't sexually compatible. And then I don't treat her poorly we just end up as friends only.

AviatorTom · Answer

Some men view sex as a competition. Once they've conquered the womanl, they mark it off in their book and move on to the next victim. Fortunately, not all men are like that.

TommyMountainFigure · Answer

I can sum that up in one sentence. Guys who do that have a lack of respect for women!

Alex-Snow · Answer

I am sorry to hear this. Some guys are stupid or jerks and just wanted the sex with someone new I guess. I never have done this, I always wanted more sex! Go figure...

FreyaRed · Answer

He had a goal and this goal was achieved. From his reference point it's time to jump on another flower.

Anonymous · Answer

Because men like that are sluts and have no respect for themselves.

serious · Answer

Simply because they are playboy type and they move from one woman to another after sleeping with her.

spartan55 · Answer

She was either lousy in bed (this is more common than you think), or he wasn't interested in more than a one time thing.

JacobJordan · Answer

Because they got what they wanted and have moved on. This is why hook up culture is not a good thing but inevitably one idiot gets butthurt and says I don't know what I am talking about.

EmmaMary · Answer

Because they're simply players... Guys being led by their knobs. WHAM, BAM, THANK YOU MA’AM.

strateguy632 · Answer

um we don't, except in high school the goal was who can get more "hits" it was not losing interest it was just evil.

boggboss · Answer

Because thats what he wanted he didn't want her he wanted sex with her

Squatting_Slav · Answer

In most cases it's because the man is not honest with his intentions. Want to just fuck? they won't say and instead pretend to be interets in her and play games to which the woman is naive towards.

tierrlamé · Answer

PNC made them realize they are actually maybe not attracted to you, they were just horny or they were just horny yow lol. Because after PNC the man’s eyes open clearly and can see all the flaws and everything whether physically or action wise..

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

Those kind of men were only looking to get sex, so once it was done then there's nothing left he wants from that woman anymore.

CallmeTheKnight · Answer

If she is easy, That’s why. If she’s terrible in bed, that’s why If she has a Body odor that’s why If she is all talk, that’s why If he only wanted sex, that’s why

Ashley1993 · Answer

The man didn't have genuine interest in her if that's the case

Anonymous · Answer

Why do you lose interest in going out to dinner when you've just eaten?

You are satisfied. Your desire has been sated.

Men want sex. When they get sex they satiate that desire (temporarily). So they stop pursuing sex.

Why do men loose interest in a woman after sleeping with her?

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