If a guy wants to go all in quickly, is it a red flag?

[Finfin1981]

So I’m in a relationship with a guy (I have known him a while but we just got together ) he was dating a girl but confessed he had strong feelings for me and we got together and he dumped her. Now he is moving at a fast pace … so wants me to go on holiday with his parents in 2 months etc

should I be worried about the pace here?

[SallyTho87]

Some people are so desperate to be in a relationship that they jump from one right into the next, without evaluating the situation, or working on themselves to fix or improve what they need to.

It sounds like this guy is taking advantage of the fact he has a new girl, and wants to show her off to everyone right away, including meeting his family. He clearly cares about their thoughts and approval, and is focused in showing you off to those people whos opinions mean the most to him.

I find it odd that he wants to move so quickly, as if there are other motives behind it. I would be careful, and only take the relationship at the pace in which YOU want. You are under no obligation to spend time with his family. You are hardly familiar with this guy in an intimate / relationship type of way, despite how long you have known him in a friendship way.
Learn about HIM first, his relationship needs, wants, expectations, traditions, beliefs, etc. and how YOUR relationship needs, wants,... match up to his.

There is no rush if you are dating someone new. Taking time to learn about your partner on a different level that is more intimate, is a HUGE thing. I don't know why he is rushing!

[DishLady]

It depends. Watch the guy’s overall character for signs of red flags. If he’s playing games but also wants to claim “all in” status then that is a red flag. If he’s hedging your questions and is emotionally unavailable but claims “all in” status, that’s also a red flag. If he seems to have anxiety or trust issues etc but is claiming he wasn’t to be “all in”… red flag.

[Kaneki05]

It can be for sure the more red flag though is jumping from one person to another. People who don't slow down and reflect don't grow up. They don't find stability and keeping move onto someone else

I would move fast in a relationship but it's not the same because I haven't jumped from one to another. I've been a single for a while now and ready.

[Anonymous]

He's known you for a while and now you're together. He likes what he has and is planning for the future. It all sounds positive.

Slow him down to your pace so you can make your own assessment at your own speed.

[on_my_knees]

If he was in a previous relationship, it's kind of like when someone gives you their cat because their grandkids are allergic to it or something like that. The cat's already been trained, so you don't need to show it how to use a litter box, how not to claw the furniture, etc. He's just continuing the behavior that he's been taught.

[SotiCoto]

If he wants to commit to a relationship early, it probably means he is afraid of being alone, since presumably he doesn't know you very well yet.

As to whether that is a "red flag" or not... I'd say no. I think people are inventing too many reasons to treat each other as disposable these days. If you start treating someone as disposable for the crime of NOT treating you as disposable then you've probably taken it too far.

[nawtee_me]

Two months gives you plenty of time to meet his parents. Tell him you need to meet his parents and get to know them. Do that as soon as possible. Then spend some time with him at their house. This way you can see if he acts differently around them than just with you. Then decide what to do.

[dustybiker2]

ADHD? No self control. Really likes you? Just wants sex? Depends.

[WhitneySnow]

Sounds like he really likes you. Don’t let him rush you.

[Booklover_90]

The fact he broke up with someone else to be with you is a red flag enough. I hope he doesn’t do the same to you.

[Staximus]

That depends on how long \ how well you know each other

[Jennz6]

Tell him maybe next time

[DrPepper12]

Go. Enjoy yourself. Worry about speed later

[eagle1951]

probably just looking for sex

[sheikalana]

Huge red flag.