What do you think about this situation? What should I do? Move on? Do u think all r just me being delusional or it's truth?

[Anonymous]

All school year, he used to approach me. He’d brush past me, linger around, and my friends would always say he looked at me when I walked past his class. Honestly, I could feel the tension between us—it was real. But the problem was me. Every time he got close, I panicked. I’d freeze up, get stiff, and my face would go all mean. I didn’t know how to handle it. I kept avoiding him and running away.

This went on for the entire year.

But near the end of the school year, something shifted. He didn’t seem to pay me the same attention anymore. I started feeling like he had moved on. And then school ended, and I couldn’t see him anymore at all.

After that, I kept waiting for him to add me on Facebook. He didn’t. So I gave in and sent him a friend request—and he accepted it just five minutes later. The next day, I texted him first. He replied fast, but it felt like he was just responding—not really engaging. I texted again the next day… same vibe. I even asked him if he liked anyone, and he said no.

Then my friend told me she was texting him too. She even showed me screenshots. She was clearly flirting with him, and even though his replies were blunt and kind of rude, he still seemed more engaged with her than he was with me. That stung. With me, he was always polite—but too polite, like he was just being nice.

I got upset. I unfriended and restricted him. I also restricted her.

But about a week later, I missed him. So I unrestricted him and sent a fake “accidental” message, just to see what he’d do. His replies were dry, but he reacted to my text which I used this 🤷‍♀️ and he reacted with 🙎‍♂️. (pouting guy)

Now I don’t know how to feel. Maybe I'm just being delusional all those time. Maybe All those things r just made up in my mind.

Can u guys tell me how is it in a guy's mind?

[SteveSmith1985]

I can help with what is on his mind.

First off. I laughed really hard at your face going all mean because you didn't know how to handle his signs of interest. That's hilarious. But also something you need to work on. Of all the possible ways you can react to a guy flirting with you, mean-mugging him... is not going to help you. Just saying, start learning to giggle nervously or something--anything--but the mean-face.

So in his head he doesn't know what to make of you. I assume he wasn't taking your face too seriously since he kept flirting. It's no surprise that he seemed to eventually move on though. Wouldn't you?

He didn't ever have any idea that you actually liked him back. I'm sure he was happily surprised when you added him on Facebook. He would have been quite happy about that.

Now here is where you fuck up.

I suspect you misread his intentions completely.

He responded right away, but you say he didn't seem as engaged, he seemed more polite/reserved with you right? Well that makes sense if you're talking to a girl you like. If you're nervous or overthinking things (as most people do), you don't know what to say BECAUSE you like the person.

I could be wrong about that part, I wasn't there for the conversation. I'd be willing to bet, that you mistook a nervous guy thinking too hard about the impression he's making, to be relaxed enough to just talk normally.

Now you really fucked up inexcusably with your getting mad at the two of them and reacting the way you did. You better be closer to 18 than 24, because this is some immature 12 year-old-girl shit. It's ridiculous. You can't act like that.

So after all that ridiculousness, what is he thinking?

He is thinking you are drama. Why would you suddenly block him? From his perspective it's random. So he's thinking: What the helll? Is she mad at me for some reason? Then when he can't find any plausible reason for you to be mad, he would roll his eyes and call you a drama queen in his head. It certainly did not make you look good.

so then you pop back up. I don't know what an "accidental message" means. But he's not an idiot. He knows it was no accident.

So here you pop back up. What's he thinking? He's thinking: What the hell is wrong with you? What's the problem? Why did you randomly block me and then get back in touch? Is this crazy non-sense how it's going to be?

You messed up here. Not in an unfixable way. It was in an unacceptable way. There's no excuse for your actions with the reacting to the screenshots. Nobody's going to put up with that kinda thing for long. You need to learn from this.

You'll be ok. Just stop acting crazy. Talk to him. Be normal.

🙂

[Asker]

He never view my stories. He is the kind of guy staying lowkey on social like no pfp , no post , just nothing. But he post a story about missing mountain city with his pic after the next day I unfriended and restricted him.

He didn't text me first. I'm the one who text him first all those 3 time I text with him. Isn't obvious I like him to him? Although 2 time is me asking about his friend (who's my friend's crush).

[SteveSmith1985]

Well, I'm not sure. Is it possible that his feelings have changed since he used to flirt with you? How long ago was this? The end of the school year... meaning when? (It must be different from here, unless it was like a year ago.

Yea it's probably pretty obvious you like him. But not overly. If he's lowkey on social media, then you can't really read anything into his not viewing your stories or posts. I don't know the significance of the story he posted. I don't have the context. I take it that this is an indirect signal about missing you? (or that's what you're thinking/wondering).

How has he seemed since you stopped being ridiculous? Have you two talked since then? If so, how was the conversation? Was it more-or-less as it usually is?

If you haven't talked since, then you need to. Even if it'll be you initiating again. You need to. Because you were the one acting weird. It makes sense that he's less inclined to reach out. Have you talked since?

[Asker]

His replies r dry as f like Sahara after I unfriended him and go talk again. But maybe it's my text , I text him nonsense so he has nothing to say. I text "pfp blank people r the victim of love 🤷‍♀️" . His replies dry but he react with this 🙍 to my text which I use 🤷‍♀️.

I always used to get attention so I can't with his dry replies so. I'm about to move on but him reacting to my text with sane kind of emoji I used is made me overthink.

[SteveSmith1985]

He's still not ok with you unfriending him. Which makes sense. If things have been different since... that is definitely why. He isn't sure about you either. Because what you did... was some "crazy-girl" bullshit that most guys will see as a giant red-flag (rightly). So you haven't worked that out as far as he's concerned.

You kinda have two choices. I can't tell you which one makes more sense.

1. You need to straight up aplogize for acting inapropriately. Let him know why you did what you did, but nevertheless that you realize it was wrong. (and only if that's actually how you see it).

And you two have a real-talk about this, and whether or not you two wanna keep talking. If you don't want to admit your feelings yet... you're kinda screwed because it's the reason you acted crazy. So you would be putting your cards on the table, and be risking rejection. On the other hand, if he does feel the same way, but was thrown-off by this unfriending thing... he'll tell you that too.

It's trying to have an open and honest talk. About everything. And getting an actual answer to whether there is something that can get going between you two. I don't know what that answer will be. But you will know for sure where you stand, and you only move on if you actually should (because you know there's no future between you two).

2. Move on as you're already considering doing.

You aren't going to fix/save this by powering-through the dryness, in hopes he'll just eventually come around and interact like he used to. You need to deal with this head-on and bluntly. Otherwise you might as well move on.

[ohsheeT]

No sorry I can't because everyone is different

But what I can tell you about is you. In life there will always be someone you like .

We all have an energy within and people call it Chemistry. But it is and energy. Some energy's pull us towards other energy's. Other people.

And we get a feeling with in when this happens and it's a beautiful feeling. Andbwhen this happens we don't know why. All we do know is it feels good and you also should know this feeling comes from you not him the Other thing is, if you like somebody tell them that way you don't break your own heart waiting.

[Asker]

I just like the idea of him. I feel ick when he approached me. Like I don't want it to happen but I feel obsessed when I didn't get enough attention.

[ohsheeT]

Then you're doing it for the wrong reasons. And in a way, settling because you want to feel something, I think, but not 100 % sure because I don't know you, but I think it goes way deeper than that

I went through this when I was in junior high school with 2 girls, and I would want to run so fast every time I would see them or they would call my name out loud and it want until about 5 years later I finely understood what was happening and it changed my whole life

I'm going to take a wild guess and say you are a very intense person at times and that you see and feel things deeper than most people

And there are moments where you almost crave that feeling because it is so beautiful and real

[SueShe]

Well, it is obvious that he tried to pick you up and after you refused or rejected his advances, he got fed up since he could not get into your pants. Guys are like that. They try and when they realize that it is vain, they move to the next target, the next victim that is more receptive and willing.

You actions are a little childish in my opinion with your friending, unfriending, restricting and unrestricting. Why don't you guys talk in real life rather than on social media?

The fact that he has moved on seems to displease you and I believe that you should move past this fling. It is not going to do you good and you will only be delusional and disappointed if you keep hoping for something that is not likely to ever happen.

[Asker]

It's bc we r in different town, and him and me r both kinda introvert who loves to stay in our own circle.

[WellBye]

What a brain gymnastic. Learn to be direct, just ask him.

[Asker]

But don't u think he should know already that I like him? I added him and text him first. I think it's obvious. Thought I text him to ask about his friend (which is my friend's crush).

[spartan55]

No, not obvious...🙄

[spartan55]

I really don't know how you came to the conclusion he was more 'engaged' with your friend by looking at texts. That's crazy.
Pro tip

[Asker]

I don't know just felt it. Thought his reply to her are kinda rude and blunt but he's engaged in by bringing other topics with her like he even say to her "I'm gonna sleep".

[spartan55]

So much wasted mental energy here. Use your words.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like he gives you anxiety. It happened to me with one girl.

[Asker]

Maybe. It's like I might be too obsessed and yapping about him all day and then when he's in front of me I become meanest bit*h on earth.

[Opinion Owner]

I unintentionally acted very cold.

[Avicenna]

You haven’t shown you’re serious or really interested.

[Asker]

I did by added him and texting him first 3 times

[spartan55]

@asker
That is so far away from showing interest. Especially considering the way you previously acted towards him.

[Danny_dan92]

He’s the guy, he should’ve picked up on the obvious sign that you like him because you would freeze up. And he should’ve acted on it

[Asker]

Yeah right? That's why they say if he wants to he will.

[Danny_dan92]

You showed signs of a girl that is interested but is shy