Why are black girls the least desirable?

Why is it that black girls are the most undesirable? (For non-black guys)I'm seeing a lot of negative things being said about black women in the media (mainly online). I even saw a forum thread dedicated to how black girls are the ugliest. Sure there are racist people that will say that other races are ugly, but black girls get the most heat. I've seen a lot of black girls ask similar questions, and people just think we're imagining things. I mean, look at the marriage rates. Black women are the least married race. I've heard people say that even black guys don't want black women.

This issue is causing my already low-self esteem to plummet to uncharted territories, even though I think I'm pretty compared to most black girls but not so pretty according to regular beauty standards (if that makes sense). My school is mostly white, but the few black girls that go there don't have boyfriends, and to me they are pretty and seem intelligent. Boys aren't everything and at our young age it's better to be more concerned with our academic and career goals, but I feel so discouraged when it comes to dating (keep in mind that I live in a predominately white area).

In conclusion, I would like to know what it is about black girls that's so unattractive? (BE HONEST, answer anonymously if you must, and don't feed me any crap about "preferences" because in most cases I find that there is underlying racism behind this so-called racial preferences).


Most Helpful Guy

  • What is it about black girls that's so unattractive? I wouldn't know, as I am so hot for a lot black gals I know.

    I do understand what this is all about though... When messing around on HotOrNot, I noticed that great looking black gals who would be an 8 or 9 in my books will tend to score a 6 or 7 (rated by predominately white male audience). There is definitely some difference between how my friends and I view the level of attractiveness for most black women. I see hot white gal, my friends see hot white gal. I see hot black gal, my friends are like, NO.

    Far from holding my head up high as a white man and being uppity about the white race on how we have such high quality women among our ranks and high standards for the women we want to be with, I want to take this opportunity to call my friends out for being the morons they are. To me, it doesn't necessarily show they have great taste in gals by having the hots for women who are almost exclusively white (Asian occasionally), but it definitely shows they are missing out on a lot of great gals... Black gals!

    Black ladies, many you are so very fine in my eyes.

    • LOL thanks for the compliment. I feel you on the friends thing. I've dated all races (white included) and my friends are cool and agree with how hot a guy is except when it comes to white guys. They say that they don't "prefer" white guys. I prefer a guy that is respectful, funny and cute no matter his color. :-)

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    • @glowgirl3 I think it is because they are thicker and the females have more testosterone than other races. We all have a "type" and it's not about skin color, it's more about facial features. It's not a racial thing if it's our sexual urges that we have no control over. Homosexuals and pedophiles cannot control who they are attracted to and neither can non black males.

    • @565658854 When has Donald trump ever said anything racist against blacks?

Most Helpful Girl

  • Hey girl,

    I read your question and, if you are asking for absolute honesty, I am going to tell you that I think you're insecure. I am not putting you (nor would I put anyone) down for being insecure (I am insecure too)! But there is no "truth" out there that one race is better or worse looking than another. You're getting too caught up in the nasty, racist opinions of certain people (people who, I'm sure, you'd never want to even associate with; much less respect enough to give their words creedence). There is a lot of hatred out there towards people of color and, I believe, it is easy for that hatred to be soaked up by the people themselves. You might believe it's a "fact" that black women are "less attractive" than other women (whatever that may mean to you), but it is NOT. I am not black, but I am in a very small minority being a Jew and I have felt very negative against my heritage based on what other people say about it. It was eye opening when I finally realized that their hate was now inside of me too! I just began to really love my culture and learn more about it. I finally embraced it, but other people's hate took a long while to shake off. You'll shake it off too. Black women are exceptionally beautiful, just as all women are. Love yourself. There is nothing not to love!


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 279

  • I do not have a lot of experience with black females. I have only seen two of them in reality, for the place where I live in does not have a lot of them (or at least there aren't many black people around here in this city at all.)

    However based on that experience and what I see from the television, it is true - I really don't like black girls physically. I can safely say this is because of the high level of racism that has been around for a long time. Therefore it just does not match my ideal for a girl to have black skin. (In fact, I tend to find the whiter the more attractive, I also have issues with tans and natural summer brownness, but that is just my pickiness.) I'm used to white. We have this saying around here jokingly: "I'm not a racist or anything, but the human skin color is white." We say that as a joke, but it does sort of stay with your expectations.

    And if there are two other really dumb reasons, one of them is that they usually have giant lips which I do not like, and the second is that the experience I've had was ghetto-ish.

    "i jst dnt understand...perfect ryt nw would b if you were here makin me laugh and stuff"

    And she types like that! How can anyone type like that? Ugh.

    So that's basically it.

    • You've never been anywhere in your life have you,your basing your ideas off of sterotypes,the average black family is middle class nowadays and your arguments are based off of woman from poorer neighborhood typically.but then agin you did say that you've never been around blacks.it not smart to use those two woman to base all black woman off of.and white skin is NOT the huamn skin color darker,tanned and brownskin outnumber white by a landslide worldwide,typical of you though,lmao at u,silly

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    • @mesonfielde that's not a good reason (but it is annoying when people type like that :I )

    • Yeah, if you think that beauty determines by skin color, then you're a complete idiot.

  • God made black women first, and made the rest outta what was left over! I'm a white guy, but I wouldn't even consider dating, or marrying, anyone but a black woman. Maybe I'm all wet, but I find in most black women a great amount of inner strength yet a certain unique sensitivity or vunerablility. It's hard to explain, but it's there in Aces. For what ever reason, I just feel more at ease, more comfortable, with black people in general. I'm one of only two white guys at my church of over 300, but I'm always treated as jan equal. Actually, I may get a little more attention, as folks don't want me to feel like a minority. LOL

    • Thanks for your kind words.

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    • I grew up in a Midwest town full of African Americans. From a social stand point I noticed many were more interested in sex than being educated so I never felt a spark with most. The ones I have dated were rude and aggressive in the relationship. Speaking physically I find that the vast majority have strange, large, unappealing proportions. Ass, hips, breasts, lips, either fat or bulky muscle build. What bothers me the most is the hair, always greesier than most, thick, and rough. I like the feeling of silky hair and gentle features. But this is my issue.

    • Two racist morons, with noggins full of lard and wanting the whole world to know it! TWEEDLEDUMB and TWEEDLEDUMBER!!

  • Unattractive?... I have known many black (and white women) in my time. When I went to school, I even dated a few ladies, who happened to be black. And I can tell you this: In our cruel world, there are some hard truths, and one of these is the whole race issue.

    But as far as I am concerned, I never judge any person on this basis. If I liked a girl, it was because she was hot. I don't care if she was white, black or purple. I think race, unfortunately gets too much attention in our Society.

    For instance, who Doesn't like Denzel? He's one of the greatest actors of our time. Yet, I can't stand some of these rapper-punks, because they are not gentleman.

    What kinda guy can't admit that Ms. Beyonce Knowles isn't just delicious?! My God, I would give my right arm to share a pair of whiskeys with her...

    On the other hand, Paris Hilton? Are you freakin' kidding me? The woman looks like she got hit in the ass with a shovel!

    No, it's all about class, not skin color. I say beauty is in the eye of the beholder. And I like to occasionally steal a glance or two at a healthy, sexy young black chick, when my wife isn't lookin...

    • I liked your answer and I agree with everything you said. It really made me smile.

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    • Very Well Spoken

    • And thank you, Mlle.

  • First, no one can lower your self esteem. You chose to lower your self esteem. Self esteem is a choice. You can chose to let the thoughts and ideas of others bother you, or you can chose to rise above it.

    Second, marriage rates say nothing about attractiveness. They're separate issues. Attractive does not automatically equal married any more than intelligent automatically equals a college degree.

    Third, you seem to see yourself as unattractive, and you're looking for validation of that opinion. Guys will write "Black girls have features X,Y and Z that I don't care for." And you'll think, "I have X and Z, my life is over!"

    Fourth, stop comparing yourself to others. Virtually every woman I know is insecure because she compares herself to other girls. It would be funny if it wasn't so sad.

    Fifth, stop looking for confirmation of racism. It's not a healthy way to spend your time. I had two Asian friends in high school. One thought he couldn't get a date because girls in our mostly white school were racist. The other Asian guy had more sex than anyone I've ever known. If one Chinese guy can get laid by a dozen white girls a year, it proves that race alone had nothing to do with the other guy's lacking love life. Race is only one part of you.

    Sixth,Asking "Why are black girls the least desirable (for non black guys)" presupposes many questionable or erroneous givens. In short, I think your question is logically flawed.

    Seventh, there's nothing about black girls in general that I find inherently unattractive, just as there's nothing in any other race that I find inherently attractive. I think some black girls are incredibly attractive and sexy. Some I'm neutral towards. Others turn me off. But to me, them as an _individual_ is what matters.

  • Honestly, I am speaking with all honesty here and I know this might come off as racist but...

    the ones who really find black women undesirable, are many black men.

    Black men, influenced by Kanye West, Snoop Dogg and other famous, influential black men have taken their influence and decided to discard even the most beautiful black women in favor of any white girl they can get their hands on, they see having a black girl with them as something to bring them down, while a white girl is meant to show that they're a "real man"

    Personally I'm a white guy, I have pale skin, my hair shines blonde when in the sun but usually it looks brown, my eyes are a really light shade of blue and I LOVE black girls, when I see a black girl at the night club, I can barely keep my eyes off her, and when I might be confident while talking to an Asian or white girl, my knees get weak and I start stuttering when talking to a black girl.

    Anyway, the only ones who willfully disregard black women and say black women are ugly are black MEN, us non-black men... either we think you're attractive or we don't, that all comes down to preference, we hold no animosity to you, the vast majority of us wouldn't join a forum just to call black girls ugly, if you're a nice girl, with a nice smile and a healthy body, you'll have white, asian, Indian etc... all kinds of guys clambering over each-other just to be with you, while black men are off chasing some overweight white girl.

  • Imo, I feel that black women are the most harshly stereotyped people (race + gender) in this country. For some reason, the masses tend to believe the small sample of black women that he/she interacted with in their lives, or seen on TV, embodies ALL black women. :-X

    Sure, there are definitely some black women that I find un-datable...but then again, there are many women that I would find un-datable, regardless of race.

    I'm very attracted to black women. I love the physical features of a black woman. I usually go for the thicker ones, since I'm a big guy.

    I like their mental strength. I need a woman like that because I can tend to dominate a recessive person. However, she has to be feminine (as in "girly") at the same time. Nails done, makeup, feminine clothing style, effeminate demeanor, etc.

    Since I'm a pretentious college graduate (lol), she needs to stimulate my mind in an intellectual manner. I'm quite an analytical person, so I need someone who can mentally "hang" with me.

    I'm in love with a cutesy, smart, dark-skinned, thick & effeminate black woman. I'm lucky to have her. :)

  • I know I'm not who you are asking this question to, but I may know...

    I think its something to do with the image black women portrait.

    I love y'all very much, and I know the other females in other races aren't perfect, but some of the things we put up with is just uncalled for.

    As far as y'all being unattractive to the males of other races...

    Thats tough, because to me other females are always trying to obtain the features that come natural to you.

    So I really think you have the wrong idea.

    Yeah you'll find some people with foolish opinions, but don't let it make you think most of them don't want you, because you are very desired!

    Don't let it offend you that chose to miss out on such a female of high quality.

    Good Luck in your research of trying to find out why...


    A Loving Black Man

  • A lot of people seem to be brain-washed by the media to be attracted to the "perfect Aryan" set of physical traits in a woman.

    Since Black women appear the furthest from this set of genetics, many men are mentally programmed to have an aversion to their physical traits.

    Hitler's words were never louder in the ears of human judgement as they are today in our subconscious interpretation of the world around us.

    Look at the unnatural things Black women feel they need to do to appear just slightly more Aryan.

    -Placing a highly corrosive chemical base in their hair in order to make it do something so unnatural, it has a pH level higher than that of liquid Drano.

    -Skin-bleaching has become an epidemic in many African and Caribbean nations, to the extent that it is socially unacceptable for a woman not to bleach her skin. This is all in spite of the detrimental effects that skin bleach has on the human dermis and lymphatic system. All just to make their skin just a tad bit closer to the perception of what the master "race" of humans should look like?

    They're killing themselves just to look more appealing to a society who's laws of attraction hold their loyalty to Mein Kampf.

    Even non-blacks buy into it.

    People with curly hair straighten it.

    People with "ethnic" noses get nose jobs to appear more "beautiful".

    Colour contacts are worn to project more strongly Aryan traits.

    Hair colour is changed.

    Facial features are altered.

    Identities are lost.

    All to appease a society who, frankly, doesn't know what to believe beauty is.

    Black Women, stop questioning why the society in which you live doesn't accept your natural Beauty.

    You know why.

    You just want constructive criticism, an Itemized list of all the "undesirable" ethnic traits in hopes of "improving your image".

    You can't

    You won't

    You shouldn't try

    It's all in vain, and trying to mesh into a system that works against you will only feed the fire.

    Be Natural, be vigilant, be intelligent, be diligent, be beautiful.

    But do not try to live by adopted standards of beauty.

    Be, within yourself, beautiful, and so the world shall see your true beauty,

    not your attempt at their definition of beauty.

    But you can be sure that only those worthy of your beauty, those with untainted eyes, will see your true beauty.

    This is a statement.

    This is not an arguement,

    Thus, there is no counter-arguement.

    Those feeling Arbitary may have a go at it, though.

    • Well...no I was necessarily looking for constructive criticism in hopes of improving my image. Maybe I was, or maybe I just want to accept the "itemized list of all the undesirable" traits.

      I appreciate your insight and you're one of the few answerers that know where I'm coming from. Or one that at least understands that I'm not completely crazy.

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    • Lol, awww, Jaron91. Don't feel that way. I relax my hair too. But I like the way it looks, and I get a style that's unique to me. And Hunterboyz, very good points. I overstated the entire post intentionally.

    • Very nice +1.. people in general shouldnt alter their image to find the true meaning of beauty.. its already there.. just accept it.

  • Let me start out by saying that I'm a mutt of mostly Western European and Hispanic, and I find black girls attractive, and I've had 2 black girlfriends.

    Anyway, my explanation for why some non-blacks view black women as "less desirable" would be because they perceive the following to be true:

    - A large percentage of blacks, and thus black women, are "ghetto." While there are more whites who are poor and "trashy/ghetto" than blacks in the US, the RATIO of ghetto to non-ghetto is far higher among blacks than any other demographic (because there are far more whites than blacks in the US). They don't like "ghetto" anything, and blacks are more likely to be that way.

    - Part of the "ghetto" issue is that promiscuity is far higher in such cultures, which is a negative to people who didn't grow up with ghetto values.

    - Many people grew up in very homogeneous neighborhoods, and so they aren't used to being around blacks, or anyone very different from their own race. Thus, their standards of beauty reflect what they are most familiar and comfortable with. Dark skin, kinky hair, and exaggerated curves seem out of place to them, simply because they aren't used to it. Similarly, a white American will look very out of place in Japan, for the same reason (very homogeneous).

    - Many whites are afraid that if they try to date black women, black men will get angry and become violent with them, which does sometimes happen.

    - Black culture can be quite different from white culture, and many people may think they just won't have enough in common to date. They may not date others who have/maintain a strong, separate culture either.

    - Some are simply racist.

    You'll never win over everyone, but IMO, if you present yourself as a person of respect and integrity, and let people get to know your personality, I think you'll overcome most of the people who initially are skeptical or wary.

    • There's a lot of truth in this answer, I think. I really like that you avoid to over-generalize.

    • Im black but i find black girls undesirable. Part of the reasons has to do with intellect compared to most other white girls.. but the main reason is... WHY THE FUCK WOULD ANYONE in the right mind have an attraction for something that looks exactly like them.. same reason wnhy more white men are going for Asians, or white girls going for black.. it's just because same on colors become mundane and boring after a while when you've got a whole lot of other options that brings versatility into the relationship. IN all honest truths however black girls are seemingly usually the least desireable even among bblakc men. Reason why most black men end up with black women is because thats what they are used to or they know they won't have a chance with any of ther race.. no offense lol. But in conclusion i believe there's everyone for everyone, all you have to do is seek in the right direction.. Black women are most certainly not the ugliest women in the world

    • @Mrpsychic - Wow, you must be a black ugly negro. I feel so sorry for you. Being with a white woman will not make you white. You don't know black men who are even interested in black women. This is why the white man treats black with such disdain. You don;t even respect the women of your race. dumb ass.

  • I'm 6'4" 268lbs. I make $40k+ a year. I am a white guy born in Mississippi and raised in Louisiana. Race issues here are immense. My very first girlfriend was black. I've dated white, asian and italian girls as well. My wife is black. She is incredibly intelligent, very successful, stunningly beautiful and loves with a passionate heat that could rival a super nova. She is more important to me than I could ever get her to understand. The media, in this case especially, is usually full of sh*t. Don't buy into it. You deserve to treat yourself better. Be proud of who you are. Not because you are black, though do be proud of your heritage, but because you are woman.

  • Wow, some of these comments are incredibly hurtful or even downright racist. And some of the entitled girls here who don't have to deal with this bullsh*t are accusing you of making this up when it is a very real problem.

    You are right, on average, men are less willing to date a Black woman. Women are also less willing to date an Asian man (I'm an Asian man). One way to see this is the interracial marriage data gathered in the last census show that there are way more Black men / Asian women in interracial marriages than their opposite sex counterparts. But I think a lot of it is a result of negative stereotypes perpetuated by society, mainly media. Black women are commonly portrayed as loud, attitude-y, uneducated, and overall masculine. Asian men are commonly portrayed as nerdy, weak, bad with women, submissive, and overall feminine. It's fine to have preference but it's not okay to be like "I don't date Black girls," that's called being racist. There are obviously differences on average, mainly in physical appearance. But they are not different enough to justify completely discounting an entire race of women. For instance, you can't say you don't like Black girls at all just because a lot of them are obese. A lot does not mean all. And like you said, many of these preferences are racist ideas people got from the media.

    Speaking of physical differences, I am actually an Asian man that has a preference for Black women. Here is what I (generally) find physically attractive about them. Black girls...

    -look good without makeup. This is like the biggest thing; it's always shocking how much more attractive White and especially Asian women can look with the right makeup. If all girls looked as they do when waking up (without makeup), I think more people would see the beauty in Black women. It's nice when your woman looks good all the time, not just with her makeup on.

    -have big beautiful lips

    -have beautiful eyes

    -are curvy and thick. I'm not a fan of skinny girls. I don't like belly fat and I'm not a chubby chaser, I just like fat in the right places.

    -have proportionally longer legs

    -have beautiful skin tone (I like dark skin)

    I hope this helps.

  • The way you and the rest on here are going on, you'd think only white people are racist and that its not on either side. I'm white from England, and your so wrong about the " preferences ". My preference is and has always been black female's, from when I can remember I've been more then attracted to black femles, dark, light beautiful. We all have preferences, a look that sends us crazy, just what your attracted too and were all attracted to one race or another ( I don't like putting it that way ) one look or another. I'd say if more black girls opened up to White men, you'd see more relationship's with Black women/ White men. Black females your BEAUTIFUL and yes I'm a WHITE man! CRAZY SEXY!

  • personally I find them very attractive, the thing is they seem to be the most isolated group of females, except for the "white washed" ones they usually hang out in their own posse, although they are obviously exceptions , they don't usually venture out of their comfort zone, they wait to be approached by guys instead of approaching them themselves, and if they do , usually only black guys, and the media usually portrays them in a bad light, they are either they crazy ghetto fabulous chicks on the news or they are music video groupies, american media at least european media is a little different with a lot more innterracial dating, me personally I find all ethinicites beautiful, even had a stage where I had a stronger interest in black women , to me gabrielle union and leona lewis are the most beautiful girls in the world, but yea at the end of the day, looking past social stigmas, if a black girl is cute and level headed then most of the time she's going to be considered a hottie, but that doesn't mean that all black women have to be beautfiul, ethnicity doesn't come into play in beauty

    • I love white guys like you, Not because you like black girls but you know have a better understanding of things and you are in touch with your self and you know why you feel the way you do about black womenunlike these men with all the crazy weird excuses for not liking Black girls like hair texture and vagina color! they are just insecure men and have issues. I would rather respect someone that's outright racist that a self hating person that has no real explanation for feeling the way they do.

  • ((Disclaimer: I'm not racist, but there are racial GENERALIZATIONS, I will make here. Please keep in mind that this refers to a "large percentage of" the black female population, but not by any means all of them, or even necessarily most of them. Just a lot of people exist that are like the following, thank you.))

    Many black girls can actually be incredibly hot, it's just that many of them often make choices and behave in manners that are simply not attractive. There are several things that can make a black girl undesirable, here's my top 4 things:

    1. The attitude. A little assertiveness can be very sexy indeed, however, yelling and screaming like you're a p*ssed off drunkard is not attractive at all. You know exactly what I'm talking about right? The whole "tough" girl act. "Oh HELL NO YOU DIDN'T!" bits. No one wants to feel like they have to walk on eggshells when they're with a girl, or worry about getting smashed in the face while sleeping. Who would want to date a girl who acts like they're gonna beat the crap out of them.

    2. The hair. Black girls with straight hair is extremely attractive. Or maybe curls that hang down, some girls can even pull off some of the crazier hair styles. However, braids, ESPECIALLY corn rows and similar hair styles that show lots of scalp and/or press your hair extremely tight to your head is NOT attractive at all. It's the EXACT opposite, I'd prefer a girl with an afro, I really would. But even better, if your hair isn't too out of control, use a hair straightener. If it's way out there, go for something like Scary Spice's old school hair style.

    (( Example: link ))

    3.Quiet down please. Some black girls are much too loud. Particularly when on the cell phone but often just in general. You come off as obnoxious and egotistical. Basically, it makes everyone around you think you're a total b*tch when you start screaming on the bus about what your girl did with that guy last night or whatever it is.

    4. Stop pretending to be dumb. No, seriously, I am getting really tired of seeing girls pretending to be stupid. Mind you, this applies to EVERY GIRL ON THE PLANET, tho this is sadly ESPECIALLY prevalent among a lot of black girls. Saying things like, "reading is hard" or "why read a book". When asked something simple, do NOT reply in a dismissive manner, "I dunno", "I don't get it", ignore the subject completely thereafter and then get upset when you get treated like an idiot, because that's how you act. If you really don't know something, maybe try and LEARN the answer or ask questions about it. "I don't know", with no further desire to investigate the subject is NOT attractive.

    Sadly, things like BET and MTV encourage behavior that does black girls such a disservice like it's cool to be freaking retarded. Stop watching those two channels and reality TV shows like they often air and you will be better off.

    • 1. I have met very few girls that have this "attitude" that you just described. I don't know ANY black girls that heavily drink and MOST of the black girls I know don't drink or smoke at all. However, I do think there is some truth to what you said about the "tough girl act". Black girls were conditioned to be very strong and opinionated because a lot of black girls grow up without fathers.

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    • Our reputation has completely been tarnished thanks to a couple of bad apples and the ignorant people that choose to believe all black women are like that.

      I stopped watching tv 3 years ago so I have no idea what's going on on MTV and BET but you seem to watch those channels enough to know. Did you ever stop to think about why black girls are they way they are? No one nowadays bothers to educated themselves on anything, they just go with what the media is brainwashing them with.

    • This is what I find, Black men will date the black girl with the attitude. They don't want the nice girls.

  • I'm a 34 year old white guy.

    It's probably NOT because they aren't attracted to the color of your skin, facial features, body type, etc.

    Some guys (especially non-black guys) are afraid of what other people might think, because of racists that they've encountered in the past who have made them feel insecure about admitting that they are attracted to black women. I think the same thing goes for black women when it comes to dating outside of their own race too. The general population of blacks are just as racist as whites when it comes to seeing their women date outside of their race.

    The reason black guys go for white women, Asian women, etc instead of black women, is because they have a fetish. Plain and simple.

    Or, they want to try something that they think is taboo (especially considering how racism made white girls etc unattainable to black men for so long in the past). It builds their self esteem to know that they can have women of other races. But although it has become more accepted for black men to date outside of their race, black men still expect black women to keep to their own - which isn't fair.

    Finally, there's the whole 'ghetto' stereotype that stops some people from dating black women. Also, some guys are afraid because they've heard how high the AIDS rate is in the black community and guys love to sleep around - so it scares them. That could be a factor as well. Even though realistically, the chances of getting AIDS from ANYONE is about 1 in 2000. Even if you sleep with someone who has AIDS unprotected, the odds of getting it are 1 in 200. (Of course these figures are only estimates made by researchers).

    However, I personally think black girls are superior to all other women. Because they are the most unique women on the planet. You can't get much more different than a black girl. So beautiful. So exotic. Black women just drive me crazy. If I met you I would probably be all over you.

    So don't feel bad. You're actually the MOST attractive of all women. It's just that non-blacks are still "insecure" about dating black women because of racist bullsh*t, and black guys are too busy chasing the exotic (women of other races that they know were once unattainable to black men). I really think some black men are still insecure about being black because of America's past, so they date other races because it's empowering to them to know that they can get from a white girl for example. To their minds, it's like driving a rolls royce. Little do they know it's the black women who are the rolls royce. :)

    So there you have it. That's why I think black women have gotten the short end of the stick in all directions. If you want to change it, start actively seeking men outside your own race and encourage your friends to do the same. (not just for my personal gain haha). Because if more black women did that, the lines between race would start to blur. Putting black girls on a more level playing field.

    • totally agree it comes from white males that live in predominately white society are afraid of what their friends might think a lot of the time

  • Guys, like girls, have their individual ideas of what they find attractive in the opposite sex. As for me, being a Black man, I have dated Black women and can honestly say that the stereotype of Black women being "ghetto fabulous" is not true. Yes there are some who fit the criteria, but I know it doesn't fit the mold for the women I dated. When I was dating black women, I tend to go for the light skinned educated Black woman. Unfortunately, many other Black men seem to go after these type of Black women as well (light skinned.) Many of the Black women I dated often knew this and it created a "diva" like mentality and they often milked it for what it was worth. Once I realized that dating this type of woman was more about how much you were willing to spend on them and not about the romance, I decided to expand my dating pool to other races. I dated White, Hispanic and Asian women, all which have their own set of positives and negatives. I also know that people think Black women have attitudes and other women don't. Let me educate you guys on a little something. If you piss off any woman, she will make it known she is unhappy, though some Black women tend to be a little louder, more confrontational and combative when doing it. Point is all women, and men have attitude. Its part of our personality traits. It just may take a little more to set some of us off than others, but its there.

    When I started dating other women besides Black, I found that I saw physical facial features I love in each ethnic group. Don't get me wrong, I think each ethnicity has beautiful women within it, but for the features I was drawn more, led me to lean more toward foreign ethnic women, mostly Asian and Hispanic.

    As I see it, with all I have learned I decided that if all women can possess attitude, I wanted to go for the woman who possessed the most facial features I am attracted to. I tend to love women who don't require or use excessive make-up, don't wear contacts to change the color of their eyes, wear their own natural nails instead of the cosmetic nails and wear their own natural hair, instead of weaves.

    My best friend, who is also my girlfriend, now fiancée and soon to be wife is Asian and I would ever consider dating anyone else as she completes me. not only does she possess the facial features I love, but our personalities are so close to each other naturally, that we seldom have disagreements.

    The bottom line is, since there is beauty in everyone, you need to seek out what makes you look and feel most beautiful about yourself. Once you find that, your esteem will rise and that will resonate to those around you. You can't expect for others to find you beautiful if you have low self esteem. Find what makes you happy and let that be your baseline. It will also help you find out who is most important to you because those who don't like it won't like you any better or worse and those who do will be more than glad to be around and court you

    • You state there's beauty in everyone but you never attempted to date darker hues of black women. Doesn't that sound a bit redundant coming from you? I'm not knocking your preference but i find it funny you choose to use both sides of your mouth.

    • Actually Cicime84 he clearly stated that he has dated quite a few black women in the past.

  • I can't tell you this isn't true for a lot of people but it isn't true for me I am European mostly also a little bit Asian and I find a lot of black girls attractive both African American and Somalian or other countries. I have crushes on lots of African Muslim girls at my school I love the dresses they wear and the hijab and I find a lot of them to be very smart and nice even if they tend to be more religious than most of the people I hang out with. I don't think its accurate to say black girls are the ugliest. To be honest I am not very attracted to white girls myself some are but in general not my preference. I am a very tan European guy partly Gypsy and I'm kind of a nerd so a lot of white people left me out of their social groups but a lot of black people accepted me as a friend and a lot of black girls have had crushes on me while a lot of white girls seem to treat me like I am a freak. So in general I have found African people both male and female to be more friendly with strangers and less judgemental which makes a lot of sense. Races vary a lot some black girls are very curvy some skinny just like all the other races. I tend to be drawn to curvy girls I am dancing around this so I'm just gonna come out and say this I like big butts I cannot lie on a girl of any race but a lot of African girls have them. As for hair I love peoples hair to be what its supposed to be. If you are Norwegian with long blond hair be proud its beautiful. If you are Latina/Native wear that long black hair don't die it. If you are African with black curly hair be proud wear braids or an afro, I have noticed different African people grow different kinds of hair because just like in Europe people in different countries of the same race look a little different. I wish less black girls got their hair straightened to try to look more white. I am not gonna say straight hair isn't beautiful because it can be but curly hair is beautiful too and no one looks beautiful trying to be someone they're not. The guy ChaosPrefect sounds kinda racist assuming all black girls act a certain way its not true. But the small percentage of African girls that do act way to stereotypical hip hop ghetto are annoying and frankly hard to talk to. I can understand most black slang but not if its said really really fast. Yet again racism means a lot of white men don't think of black girls as marriage material but that doesn't mean they don't think your sexy they just want to exploit black women for sex only. Just remember its really racist people who are missing out not you. As for me I have dated black latino and white women and would definitely consider marrying a black girl if that's where things led. I know that's not really an answer to your question but If Ihad to guess it would be not that black girls are considered in any way less beautiful or sexy just that because of racism some of white men don't even consider black women for serious relationships. Their loss

    • I really appreciate your answer because I had a bad day and reading a couple of the answers below made me feel even worse about it.

      Anyway, I was in no way saying black girls are the ugliest. I think all races are equally beautiful but it does seem like people consider black women the least desirable. I've created fake accounts on online dating sites and I've seen pages and pages worth of guys that check off every race except black (I saw that many black men also do this).

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    • I love you... ^_^

    • Thats cool you should hit me up on AIM sometime my name on there is TheMSMKhan

      Sometimes I feel the same way you do about my "race" I am mixed race so when people keep to their own race I get left out. I'm not any girls ideal guy to take home to their mom and my skin makes people nervous at the airport

  • Perhaps because black women are substantially more violent towards their boyfriends and husbands than the other way 'round.

    A study of FBI statistic found that of all racial or ethnic groups, black men are the *most* likely to be killed by a spouse [Mercy, J. A., & Saltzman, L. E. (1989). "Fatal violence among spouses in the United States, 1975-85" American Journal of Public Health, 79, 595-599.]

    A 1985 study [Hampton, R. L., Gelles, R. J., & Harrop, J. W. (1989). "Is violence in families increasing?" A comparison of 1975 and 1985 National Survey rates. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 51, 969-980] found that black women exhibit three times the rates of violence towards their partners, compared to white women.

    More recent studies found that black women are more likely to attack their boyfriends/husbands than the boyfriends are to attack their wives/girlfriends. [Caetano, R., Schafter, J., Field, C., & Nelson, S. M. (2002). "Agreement on reports of intimate partner violence among white, Black, and Hispanic couples in the United States." Journal of Interpersonal Violence, 17, 1308-1322.]

    or [Clark, M. L., Beckett, J., Wells, M., & Dungee-Anderson, D. (1994). "Courtship Violence among African-American college students." Journal of Black Psychology, 20 (3), 264-281.]

    or [DeMaris, A. (1992). "Male versus female initiation of aggression: The case of courtship violence." In E. C. Viano (Ed.), Intimate violence: interdisciplinary perspectives. (pp. 111-120). Bristol, PA: Taylor & Francis.]

    or [O'Keeffe, N. K., Brockopp, K., & Chew, E. (1986). "Teen dating violence." Social Work, 31, 465-468.]

    or [Rouse, L. P. (1988). "Abuse in dating relationships: A comparison of Blacks, Whites, and Hispanics." Journal of College Student Development, 29, 312-319]

    or [Sorenson, S. B., Upchurch, D. M., & Shen, H. (1996). "Violence and injury in marital arguments: risk patterns and gender differences." American Journal of Public Health, 66 (1), 35-40]

    or... you get the idea.

    By the way, it's not just black girls who are more likely to attack their partners. Hundreds of studies show women tend to use more physical aggression than men do in dating:


    • Thats absurd! you sound ridiculous. yes, there are white guys who may be intimidated by black girls, but violence is not the primary reason for white guys to find black girls least desirable amongst other races. I'm not a white guy and I know that. Unless you wanna say that most white guys are p****s and afraid of getting their ass beat by a black girl so they don't desire them . I don't think so. Your "statistics" are unneccessary and you're over-exaggerating everything. its simply unreasonable.

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    • Yea timberlake, I agree.. people should stand up for themselves.. no matter what race or how innocent or humble they are.. I'm glad that you don't take shhit from anyone.. that's how all girls should be.. I'm sick of girls breaking up with guys and getting back together over and over because he has an emotional cholkhold on her through physical violence.. I have a sister, she is innocent and naive and I can only hope she can stand up for herself when she get into a relationship or in general.

    • Great answer!

  • iight foreal if anything I find black women to be more desirable over all other races I always have and I'm puerto rican there's jus something about them, they seem more confident and independent and I love that about them they don't take bullsh*t they're fly and they're more real than any other race I've been wit straight up (no offense) that's why I'm wit a black girl right now yooo! forget what everybody else gotta say I love black women

  • first off I would presume you live in the "good ole us of a"...=tons of racism. not so much here in canada and I can speak for myself when I say I LOVE black women. send me a pic if you REALLY want me to judge funstuff01@hotmail.com but seriously, fk em if they ain't into you, racist bastards

  • "but I feel so discouraged when it comes to dating (keep in mind that I live in a predominately white area)."

    That right there is one of your problems. You think it's because there aren't that many blacks around that you that you can't be with someone or that your chances are lower. I did a huge project for a psych class that I was in (my term project/paper). I surveyed some 300 guys and 300 girls of varying race, class, and age (18-27). Out of all the other races and genders of those races, black women were the least open to interracial relationships and inter-religious relationships, and several other things which guys listed as unappealing.

    I have no clue (well not a full, complete one anyways) as to why a large amount of black women are afraid of interracial relationships. I've had black women who have said no to me or avoided me and actually told me upfront "I don't get involved with anyone but a Brotha." Then a week later complain about the lack of men. Not saying you or all black women act that way, but a decent amount do, close themselves off to other prospects for one reason or another. Some people of whatever skin color are just more comfortable keeping within their group, clique or whatever you want to call it. I'm currently with a beautiful black woman and she treats me like a prince and I treat her like she is everything in my world. Some are just more comfortable than others being outside their skin, if you will excuse the pun.

    So my best advice is be yourself, take care of yourself physically, mentally, etc., and if no one is approaching you, find someone you like and go after them.

    • No, I'm very open to interracial relationships (I probably wouldn't have asked this question if I wasn't). I'm also a product of an interracial relationship, but I do know what you mean. When ever my cousin and I are together and I say that a non-black guy is cute she just doesn't see it. She's almost repulsed by non-black guys for relationships. You're right I should just go after anyone I like, but I'm afraid that if he's not black he's not going to think I'm attractive.

    • Everyone has their personal tastes, even within the races, some white guys only like red heads or blondes, tall and thin, or curvy, or whatever. Everyone has their preferences, so is skin color. I know guys who prefer not to be with anyone outside their race, but as you mentioned so do women (like your cousin). If you project confidence and think you're attractive, so will he think of you, if he doesn't the old cliche is still true, there are many more fish in the sea...

  • They're not the least attractive. But you're talking about a predominantly white nation having a preference towards predominantly white women.

    It's interesting all the generalizations about black women. A lot of such generalization, like the attitude or the weight, come from how black Americans are socialized by each other and the media. They are still recovering from a past so traumatic is sends ripples through the entire race.

    But it's rather ironic to generalize blacks: Nearly all of the genetic variety in the human species is in Africa and in blacks around the world. Europe, for instance, is the most genetically-homogeneous continent on the planet. The Germanic nations even more so.

    So you can expect that white people would have a preference for white features. And TBH, the stereotypical black woman (Loud-mouthed, KFC-eating, finger-waving, generously-sized woman.) repulses me to no end. But since when were all black women like that?

    Here are some women I find quite attractive:

    Aisha Tyler:


    Halle Berry:


    Michelle Obama:

    Not as much physically, but I think she's awesome.

    Esperanza Spalding:


    To finish it off, I have a question for women, then. What do WOMEN have against Asian men? Asian men seem to be viewed as the least desirable men.

    I've heard enough times "How did that Asian guy end up with a white girl? Like THAT can ever happen." To which I reply "Okay, sure...but they get Asian women!"

    • I PERSONALLY DO NOT have a problem with Asian men. In fact, I am absolutely crazy for them!!! From personal experiences, I have been ridiculed for obsessing with Asian men, from women of different backgrounds. Basically, the stereotypes fall into place. It's sickening... It's from the same women that say, "Men don't like me because I'm too fat, I'm too ugly..." But you just did the same external thinking to that Asian man that could have been amazing, etc. I don't get it. I want my future husband to be Asian, I don't want to talk a lot, but my heart is in Korea; both North and South and I plan I marrying someone from there too <3

    • Asian men are super sexy, it's just that most of them cannot date outside of their race because of their heritage, so I just assume he's unavailable. It's hard for me to find an Asian boyfriend, and believe me... I want one!

    • Hah michelle is an intersex person and she's got a penis

  • I know this is an old post but people are still finding and reading it so here:

    Black women are some of the most desirable women in the world. That is why we have been mixed with so many races, French, Spanish, Dutch, etc. Why did so many Slave Masters visit the black woman's coveted vagina? Even in her raw beauty of uncombed hair and ragged cloths made from hemp men of all races found her irresistible. Just take a look at history, not His -Story.

    Did white mother raise her little white children? No sir, guess who raise her little white babies? Mamie. You want to know why? Not only was the black woman most desirable for her beauty and sexuality but she was also thought to be better suited as mother to young offspring's of little white children. I could go on and on but I don't have the time. I'm sure I'm going to get a lot of hate but just look at history, it tells it's own story. No hot irons, no make up, in some cases not even a bath! so how did some of us get light and damn near white is she is so undesirable.

    It's a part of mental slavery and mental bondage that we need to break away from and recognize the black woman for everything she was, everything she is, and everything she will be. Big Dre

  • At the end of the day all the human race came out of a Black woman she is the first woman of Creation,In the Holy Bible King Solomon Sings a song about the Beauty of a Black woman,all nations have Health and Beauty,But the Black woman stands out with hers as she has The Original Touch of class as I said Life it self began in Africa the Black Woman is the Mother of Creation ,why try to put her down when she gave you all life?

    • Solution to your problem. if your gonna date a black girl, don't date the ghetto ones.Or even better solution, DONT DATE THE AMERICAN ONES. Problem solved. Something is wrong with the country you people live in, all American women act trashy and America is fat country. Its the truth :/ As soon as I came to this country, I noticed how filled with racism and ignorance it is.

  • I'm a white male republican, very conservative, and don't find black girls hideous or anything like that. People who say stuff like that are just being petty, taking out their anger on an online forum because it can't be traced back to them. I have met a few attractive black girls I wanted to date very badly - one was a cowgirl from TX - problem is they didn't want to date me hahahaha.

    Black guys not wanting black women? Eh I hear that from white girls when they see a white guy with an asian girlfriend - like he's "going the easy route" or some sh*t like that. I was with an asian girl for quite awhile and heard those sorts of things from lots of girls.

    As far as school goes, schools are war zones and whichever group is least represented will be the most ostracized. It's just a fact of life that you'll have to deal with - it's not fun but that's just the way things are.

    To be honest you shouldn't be worrying about stuff like that, racial statistics, what weirdos say on message boards, that sort of thing. It's all a bunch of BS. Just be yourself - being black doesn't doom you to failure any more than being short, tall, thin, fat, whatever.

    • That was extremley rude. You need to get a life. I honestly feel bad for you. "Human skin color is white? You must have be blind!!!

    • @Luvglee: you are an idiot. This man had a perfectly reasonable answer and explanation. Next time, comment on the right f'ing answer.

    • Im a black girl and I think you are very educated like some of the guys here. It makes sense what you say. I think its the nasty ghetto loud" Loquishas with the unstable necks and man attitudes" that give refined black girls a bad rep. But please remember the same way some guys take out anger on these forums and say bad things about these girls is the same reason some black girls are so effeminate. It has to do with history, being ostracized and having to "bear a heavy load in life.

  • Funny thing is you asked the question and said the answer... MEDIA.

    If you tell a lie long enough, loud enough and often enough, the people will believe it.-------Adolph Hitler.

    Check out what the media says about black girls, hell remember the white girl that got missing in aruba or some place like that, look at all the media coverage, but I promise you if that girl would have been a black girl, she wouldn't have got nearly as much media coverage, why, because it's understandable if a black girl would run away from home, but a white girl, God Forbid...she came from a good home, she did this and did that, oh and by the way she was beautiful...thus indirectly, people will see this and decide that beauty looks like this. Beauty is in the eye of the camera.

    • Interesting points you made.

      Yes, black girls go missing and get raped all the time and no one cares. it's really sad. You have to be society's definition of beauty to even be thought about. I actually blame black media more. BET is the worst!

  • That’s a fascinating question.

    I guess it comes down to biology. We are just socializing mammals, and for most of human existence, we’ve only lived in small groups. It’s only been in the last 10,000 years or so (a mere blink of the eye in geological timescales) that we’ve started to live in gatherings of more than a few hundred. Back then every group was competing for the same resources, so it made evolutionary sense to be wary of strangers. If somebody wandered into your village, who looked different from your people, they were considered a threat.

    So we are genetically predisposed to be attracted to people who look somewhat like us. And to fear those who are different.

    In more recent times we’ve been forced to live in bigger and bigger groups and during the last hundred years, in far more diverse groups. Which means that a lot of us have managed to overcome that predisposition,

    Personally, I am a white guy living in a very multi-cultural city. I consider myself to be very liberal, and have friends from all races. I have seen plenty of beautiful Black women, Asian women, Mediterranean women, Arabic women... And I recognise their beauty. But I’m not sexually attracted to it.

    But there’s absolutely no denying that deep down inside my brain, that I find girls who look like me more attractive than girls who don’t.

    I’m sure that black guys find black girls hotter than others

    And Asian dudes dig on Asian chicks.

    That’s not to say that some people can’t overcome this programming –thank goodness they do. It makes the world a far more interesting place.

    • ooh BULLSHIT. If you fear those who are different why do you love gingers? I don't see brunettes having issues with blond folk? Bc incase you haven't noticed; many white dudes bitch about Latinas being sexy. So why is that not the same for black women? They are all sick and you are all twisted

  • I don't find this venue to be a place that is going to be very affirming for any WoC. And I recommend you surround yourself with people who see you as beautiful just as you are. Below I recommended one site called "Racialicious" and there are so many more: The Feminist Texican, Womanist Musings, and all the blogs they link to. I would never send any of my Black woman friends here! I find this place generally too white-dominated.

  • Because people like those who like, or seem to like, them. Most white guys have the same problem that most black women on here have: they believe that the other isn't interested. If you show a white guy (or any guy of any race) that you're interested, then, if he's attracted, he will ask. Now, it might take longer for him to get the hint than it would for a black guy, and you may have to be more direct, because for a while he might believe that it's all in his head and you're just being nice, but he should eventually get it.

    • Ohhhh, you just made my life wayyyy easier. WOW. That makes sense.

  • I'm a white guy, and personally I love black girls. They don't take sh*t from anyone...at least the ones I know. I have dated a few black girls in fact. Like I said, they rock. It's funny that you mention that black guys don't often go for black girls because I have a black guy friend who said he doesn't like black girls. I'm not sure why but he doesn't. It's sorta opposite between us. He likes white girls and I like black girls. idk. It most likely IS preference. idk

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What Girls Said 233

  • The world has become an awful sh*t show in some aspects and you shouldn't let it get to you...trust me. I'm african and I have heard it all. Dark skin just has a baddd rap. Media and overall ignorance is to blame.I think it's awful to watch shows( that project a very stereotypical black character)and then base your opinions of AAs off of that. Just like it's ignorant to live in a small town and say,"The couple of black people I came across had attitudes and now I'm just not attracted to black girls. Personalities are based on so many factors..environment,life experiences etc..and that goes for everyone of every race. Then you have those who talk about the way we LOOK. They don't like our boobs,butts,noses,skin color etc. Fine.Thats your preference. But the irony is

    natural dark skin gets a thumbs down,meanwhile folks are roasting in the sun to become DARKER. Only to know that their skin is going to become permanently damaged as they age but who cares eh? Folks are flocking to the doc to get collagen injections to make their lip larger! Would ya look at that?! Butt implants,Boob implants etc. Things that a lot of dark women naturally have,others covet and they buy it. But because of our dark skin,we aren't necessarily acknowledged for a lot of positive attributes..physically or otherwise. Enough with the superficial physical aspect,i just had to address it. Racism/prejudice is unfortunately buried deep into the Americas soil. Dark skin has always been thought of as the "lesser". But other parts of the world is different...more receptive even. It's unfortunate that some folks are using this forum to express their racism and predjudices,but at least they are being honest. I say,learn to love every inch of you! You are Gods creation so you are beautiful.

  • There are attractive black woman and unattractive white women. I think black women get a lot of BS put on them from the way media portrays African American women. Like look and Beyonce and Tyra Banks. Yes both are beautiful black women but both have very white features and work very hard to obtain that type of look. Then you have a beautiful black woman like Alex Wek ( a runway model) who is straight out of Africa and one of the most strikingly beautiful women I have ever seen IMO. I think the media takes so many beautiful black women and tries to fit them into a white mold. Therefore other black women that don't look white enough question their beauty because of it. I have many black friends that are drop-dead gorgeous and a lot of them don't realize it because they feel like they don't fit societies standards. I even have a half and half friend that people do double takes at and she still straightens her beautiful curly hair and wears blue contacts to cover her honey colored eyes. I just don't get it. The world is just messed up today. I love people who look unique and different. I think women just have it bad no matter what with all the pressure put on us. Black women have it even worse because of stereotypes place on them and the pressure to look white. Again though, black woman are just as beautiful as white woman, as are Hispanics and every race in between. Everyone race has beautiful and unique features and needs to embrace them not matter what pressures society puts on them.

    • Beyonce & tyra don't have "white features".

      Full lips. Nice butts. Curves.

      Where are the white features you speak of in these woman?

      They seem to have positive attitudes with nice bodies.

      You may not have meant it the way I'm taking it, but that was kind of racist.

      I agree that the media puts a strain on some features, but what makes them features of white females?

      Because the majority of white females don't even have these features.


      A Loving Black Man

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    • So you'd argue that by her getting a nose job, which many blacks don't often do, is her attempting to "look" more white? And this is factual information?

      Oh I get it, she doesn't want to enhance her looks, she wants to be more white?

      So some how you feel she wants a "whiter" nose?

      She's not trying to meet the mold of "white", but rather perfection.

      White women don't have perfect noses. That's why the are always getting a nose job. Its not a white feature.


      A Loving Black Man

    • Yer beyonce has completely changed and looks more "white" or "superficial" : https://news.makemeheal.com/images/beyonce-plastic-surgery3.jpg

  • I'm white, and I've seen many black girls whose beauty I envied. But any man who would not date a woman based on her appearances alone is shallow.

    I've noticed something about the black community, however, and I don't mean to generalize--many times, it seems that black women are viewed in a more demeaning and less respectful way by their own families and communities, with young girls being raised with the mentality that they have to catch a man and keep him happy. This is somewhat less true for whites. Again, I'm generalizing, and correct me if I'm wrong. But I'm a salesclerk and I see and deal with all kinds of people. I've seen black men treat their girlfriends like they were lucky to have any kind of male attention at all. This is as much her problem as it is his. Her acceptance of his treatment of her just perpetuates it.

    For an intelligent, educated, and pretty black woman such as you seem to be, you should not have any problem finding someone who values you for who you are.

    One last thing--for every rule, there is an exception. For instance, it's thought that most men prefer women with big breasts. And maybe they do, but that isn't stopping the millions of small-breasted women in the world from finding people who love them and value their beauty. So even though you may think that many men find black women unattractive, there are just as many men who think they're beautiful--or who, most importantly, judge women on an individual basis rather than as a group.


    We’ve been targeted since we were brought over here to be enslaved. People try to eliminate what they fear which is why they do everything in their power to eliminate us. Our history contains people who have fought against injustice and those in charge don’t like that. They hate us because historically, we’re a strong people and they know that we have the power to defeat injustice if we stuck together. Because of this knowledge many vices were introduced to our communities that we now use to eliminate ourselves. You see, they are just sitting back and laughing at us (figuratively speaking) while we parade around like buffoons, using the tools that they gave us to annihilate our race. They give us the labels as uneducated, promiscuous, lazy, nappy head, etc to make everyone including us believe that we are of lesser quality than our white counterparts. So when someone fits the stereotype, they are put under the spotlight. So a pregnant black girl is viewed as a loose sex-feign because of the jezebel stereotype; whereas, a pregnant Hispanic girl may not be focused on as much. Everyone is conditioned to hate us directly and indirectly. No one understands what black people face in this society which is why many of them get frustrated when the question of race arises. We live in a land built by us but a society that was constructed to defeat us and those benefitting from it expect us to “let it go” like the problem has been solved. Regardless of what people say, we are not given the same opportunities and those that we do have, we had to jump through 400 hoops to obtain. It is true that Maury’s show needs to be discontinued but making a mockery out of minorities is what makes the money so it will continue to be shown. Modern day minstrel shows which should also be removed from television is anything related to Flavor Flav, New York aka Janice the Muppet, For the Love of Ray J (even though that’s my god brother, I hate that show), the Cleveland Show, Rap videos that glamorize the ghetto and “the splash life” and the list goes on. The truth is, as long as black people continue this fight against each other and the desperate struggle to fit in with mainstream society by allowing themselves to be molded into what Anglo America wants them to be, we will continue to be pimped by this society. We should be able to be who we are and not let anyone else make us feel ashamed of it. We should be able to speak how we want, dress how we want, and act how we want etc because if I’m not mistaken, society is not whose judgment that matters. People need to learn to accept each other for who they are and not for what one thinks one should be.

  • I think that's ridiculous to say an entire group of people are ugly. Everyone looks different. Of course there are similarities. Black women have their assets just like any other race. Full lips, dark eyes, curvy figure. That sounds like today's ideal beauty to me. And I wouldn't worry about fitting in with the ideal beauty anyway, we all know they are impossible standards. What's more ideal is to accept our own beauty, no matter what.

    I've not experienced this thing about black women not being as beautiful. Partly because I'm white, so I'm just oblivious to it. But maybe being in a predominately white area they see you as different and unfamiliar and are afraid. When you are at a point in your life to move, look for a place with lots of diversity, you will find accepting people that won't think being black is so different.

    My best friend in college was a black girl and she preferred white men. And we noticed that typically white men see black women as "exotic". And she had many dates and boyfriends, but rarely long term relationships because these men were looking to get to have sex with "the black girl".

    I really have no clue why all this is, but I wanted to give my most honest answer. I'm sorry you have to experience this, I think black women do have a hard role to play in life, and it makes them stronger and more independent and perhaps superior women.

    • I also forgot to add my friend is currently in a serious long-term relationship with a white man. So, while in her youth she had more trouble, as she got older men weren't so superficial I guess.

    • No...they are not afraid of me. They'll be nice to me and be my friend but they won't even consider me or another black girl for a girlfriend.

  • Ok I'm going to be completely honest with you now and I don't want any hateful comments. I'm black (Nigerian) and I live in a predominantly white area that is adjacent to a really diverse area. I also go to a predominantly white school. I think the reputation of black women has been tainted. We are seen in such a negative light because of the way we are portrayed in the media. Shows like Jerry Springer and Maury make us look like we are promiscuous and low down and also unintelligent. Also, have you noticed how movies always show black people in the ghetto or show black women as saying things like "um hmm sister girl" "oh no he didn't" and rolling their heads and smacking their teeth. It's ignorance and people that don't really understand black people are going to say and do things because of what they've seen from a few black people. The media also has a greater affect on people than they know. I think it really depends on the people you are around because I'm black but I get attention from all color guys and I like guys of all different races including my own. It's just the way things are in the world you're always going to get the ignorant people and the more open minded.

    Also, it's the way some black girls act that causes them to be seen that way honestly there are some black girls that don't know how to act and people seeing that makes everyone think we are the same. I advise you to do what makes you happy and date whoever makes you happy. I know a whole bunch of white girls my friends included who are single so it's not just black girls (I blame it on the guys of today but whatevs haha). I definitely wouldn't judge all black girls because of what a handful do. It all depends on who raised you and where you were raised. Black girls usually have the hardest lives and go through a lot so they sometimes come off a little stronger than others. They don't mean to but you are a product of your environment. I'm Nigerian so I wasn't really taught to act the way other black girls around me usually do and I also live around a lot of white people so I'm also a product of my environment.

    Don't feel bad about how you look because of your skin color because let me tell you black is beautiful. If you carry yourself well, take care of yourself people notice no matter what color you are and if their are racists then screw them they don't matter because they're stuck in a fantasy world where they haven't realized that yeah there are other races other than mine and they are no different than mine it's ignorance that's in these people and that's the way they will always be. Do what's best for you and celebrate being black because that's part of what makes you beautiful : )

  • We are told what is and what is not beautiful. The media is sending out subliminal messages to the black community that we are ugly and less of a person than someone of European descent. Black women are portrayed as gold0diggers, jezebels and any other negative thing that you can think of. Black people in general are portrayed as uneducated, "ghetto" behaving hoodlums who speak slang and Ebonics. Look at Maury and his baby daddy-shows, any judge show, the news ,etc. These images, among other things, cause many of us to internalize these beliefs, in turn creating the deep rooted self-hate that is currently present in our community.I could go on forever, literally, but I'll stop here because I can feel myself getting out of control.

    • You are so right, but some people are in denial. The Maury show needs to be discontinued. There are also a lot of negative presented in the media that don't show white women in a favorable light but why do you think black women get picked on the most? Mexican teens get pregnant at a higher rate than black teens but it seems like the media wants to pick out black teens more for doing that.

    • I?m going to answer your question in a new reply because the comment section is too short for what I have to say.

  • i disagree with what you're trying to do, you cannot look to the internet to get the answers for that, some people are going to be even more cruel and blow your self esteem further, you ever wondered why Oprah and other famous people don't reply to critics, because it is not important. You need to visit sitesthat build self esteem, it seem you are looking in all the wrong places. No one has the authority to speak on which race is rough or cute gimme a break, some whites, Chinese , blacks all have their nice looking and ugly people. WHO CARES! a sad group of people will like you to care but you are wasting your time. YOU ARE WHAT EVER YOU FEEL! LOOK AT OPRAH, HALLE BERRY they don't give a sh*t they just live the life they were given!

  • Don't believe that crap sweetheart! I am a black girl and I have dated outside of my race and inside of my race and every guy I've dated has thought that me and my friends were all beautiful. I even dated a white guy that had never dated a black girl before and he said his whole opinion on black women changed and we are still friends to this day! Yes, society dictates that black women are "less pretty" but I 100% disagree. What about the Angela Basset's and the Sanaa Lathan's or the Halle Berry's? Gorgeous black women! I could go on and on! This one black guy (and he is fine as all get up) that I've been seeing has dated white women, asian women, hispanic women you name it, and he told me that the only reason why a lot of men are intimidated by black women is because you have to come at us in a "real" way. Meaning, we usually see right through all the crap they try to give and so you have to come corrected. He said that's the fun part though because you do have to be on your A-game. Feel proud of who you are.I am not "ghetto" at all. I was raised by both parents in a suburbian home, went to college and am proud of who I am. I went to a mainly white college but white guys still talked to me because I exuded confidence. When you are confident and secure in your beauty ANY guy will want you. I think all women are beautiful (every race) and black women are in that list as well! Keep your head up sweetie! :-)

  • i think you should watch White Chicks to compare blond dumb bitches to african american girls who tend to say "I'M GONNA BUST YO MUTHAF()CKIN ASS", and see which one is more approachable and therefore more desirable xD

    But yet, there are many black girls that are very beautiful and desirable in this industry.

    Look at Halle Berry and Beyonce for example. They are beautiful, gorgeous and sexy women that men of all nationalities drool over.

    I also think that Alicia Keys is very beautiful, but she is half white.

    What do most of these women have in common? They have class.

    Thanks to comedians and tv, the media has portrayed african american women to be ghetto, and unmannered people.

    I believe that there are A LOT of intelligent, talented and or beautiful african american girls there, and if you let it shine through, you'll be very desirable.

    Being black is not a factor in what men seeks as a partner. I've seen many black people hanging out with whites and having white boyfriends.

    therefore I think its also based on the culture and who you hang out with. If you hang out with your own race, you are definitely going to date someone black. Chinese date chinese if chinese people is the only race they hang out with. However, if you mix with the whites, chances are very high that you will date a nice caucasian male.

    Good luck

  • The anonymous under 18 female is very accurate.

    Studies have shown we go for people that look like us, e.g. I myself as a dark haired white dominant facial features female go for males who fit the same type. Its not deliberate, I just do. Though I do sometimes go for darker men too, I find some Turkish, Persian and Arab men physically attractive but cultural differences put me off.

    Best way to assess this is thinking about people born in your country. I think I'd date British Indians no questions asked, British Carribeans and Jamaicans again, I like their features and skin colour is not what puts me off. I once got with a pretty dark Indian guy cos he was south Indian. I go for features like mine though, so yeah, a straight, dominant nose is part of what I like. But I reject as many Celtic looking white men for that as I would non whites.

    Now to answer why others find black girls unattractive... I will be honest and repeat discussions I have had with friends:

    Man 1: (white british, 24) He adores Zambians and African women in general. He just thinks they posess a natural beauty, striking big eyes and full smiles that white, asian or Indian women cannot compete with.

    Man 2: (white british, 25) Says northern Africans are the most beautiful. He has never got with a black woman though and generally prefers white women, he finds them "safer" and less likely to have other issues.

    Man 3: (academic indian living in europe, 31) Says Indian women are the most beautiful, he goes completely for the face and thinks Indian women represent the artistic ideal. He has also got with white women too when he likes their faces. He doesn't like black women and he has no real explanation for it, they just fail to turn him on. He also doesn't like oriental/asian women because he says they look androgenous and have small breasts and bums.

    Man 4: (white german, 30) Has only got with white women, he is not opposed, its just never happened any other way.

    Various other men from various places have said that they would only get with their own race plus white. I think the anon answer is correct, it is just because the white woman has become idealised because of the white dominated media and porn industry. Also in many cultures, pale is seen as better, so whites automatically escape any colour prejudice. Also yeah there is this kinky dominance thing. In Germany I saw some ok looking Turkish boys with hideous German girlfriends - its just a status thing. I find it weird, the assumption we are better I am assuming cos they think we are richer and higher in status, when in actual fact a lot of the girls these guys pick are lower than themselves.

    I'm no white supremecist or nationalist, but I say stick to your own nation, culture, class and religion wherever possible. I lived in Germany for two years, and there are a lot of guys out there just wanting to tick a box on their world map. Don't be someone's novelty, be with an equal.

    If there are nice black guys, date them.

    • Well what do you have to say about the people who have limited or no racial preference? I can't help but think that the whole racial preference idea is flawed.

      Hmm, well I'm a product of an interracial relationship and I'm sure there were some mixing further back in family tree too, so technically I'm only black because white people say so. So I'm already screwed up. My features aren't even african at all, the only thing black about me is my hair and skin. So where does that leave me?

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    • When you say someone should "be with an equal" it makes me wonder. All humans are equal regardless of national origin, skin color, religion, or what ever.

    • Yeah, and it would be nice if the rest of the world thought that way.

      I mean someone who views you as an equal. I've fallen foul of people who only really wanted me for either my personality or the fact they find England cool. They didn't view me as an equal, they viewed me as a novelty.

      The only way to avoid this is to stick with people of the same background.

      Which is shit for me because I have a thing for Arab guys... I just find them the most physically attractive....!

  • I know many Caucasian males who prefer Black Women. What I think is sad, is that you're desperately trying to get the attention of Caucasian males. I understand there is a shortage of African American males in your school, but this should not plummet your self-esteem. Maybe the men in your school choose to date women within their race. It's not always a bad thing. Do not take it too personal. Another reason why you probably have not attracted a White male is because you are thinking about it too much! I am a Black Woman. I have never been in a relationship with someone outside my race...but I have always been approached by White males. But if they didn't approach me, my self esteem certainly would not plummet!

  • I am a girl, so I don't know why men don't seem to like black women, but I would like to tell a story about something that happened in high school to me. I was raised to judge each individual individually to decide whether or not they were a worthwhile person. I was raised that there is no difference between people with different color skin, we just have different color skin, that's all. I was also raised to have no clue that there was any difference between religions. Different people believe different things is what my mom used to tell me, and that whatever works for you is what you should believe.

    One day in school when I was a junior, we were doing some kind of election for something. There were 4 girls up for election. Two white girls, a mexican girl, and a black girl. The black girl just happened to be one of the sweetest friendliest people ever, and was pretty much liked by every single person in the school, so we all knew she was going to win. Everyone had been asking everyone who they voted for all day long...yeah yeah yeah, we weren't supposed to and blah blah blah, but we did anyway. I had asked all my friends already, and we had all voted for Sharifa. EVERYONE I asked had voted for her. So I asked the girl who sat in front of me in math class who she voted for, and when she said Sharifa, I smiled and said "that's what I thought". I was about to add that there was pretty much no way she was going to lose because we all like her so much when this girl stood up and screamed at me for being a rascist bitch, and challenged me to fight right there in the classroom. I had no freakin clue what she was talking about until she screamed at me some more about "that's what you thought huh? that's what you thought because I'm black I'm gonna vote for the black girl?" That wasn't what I meant at all...Sharifa was my friend. I thought she would vote for her because we all did, not because she was black. It actually still hurts my feelings when I think about how angry she got and what she thought I meant. Unfortunately, that is the type of thing that is shown about black women in the media. Black women always get portrayed as "strong" and "powerful" they are never "sweet" or "the girl next door". The media promotes this view of strong powerful black women and I think lots of men get that confused with cold and dominating. Men are intimidated by women that could kick their ass, and that is how black women in the media are portrayed. I don't know why that is, but that is what I have seen. I myself am white, and am not particularly attracted to white men at all. I prefer Asian men...I don't know why but to me, they are more handsome than other men. I don't know if that answers anything you asked, but I think so.

  • As a black girl in the suburbs, I see where you're coming from. I'm more likely to get called fat because I have a big ass, even though I would even if I was really skinny (people in my family are really skinny and have the same problem; it's a genetic thing, I guess). As for the facial structure comments I've been hearing, enough with the generalizations. People can't control their gene pool, or their skin color. And the attitude/accent thing. Seriously? I know a black girl who got into both Dartmouth and Yale, and not just because she's a minority female. She has impeccable English and is one of the smartest and nicest people I know. And I spend my days surrounded by mostly white people, and she goes to school in the city. Plenty of black girls don't look like apes. As for skin color, well, it's a matter of preference, but I really hope that's not the only reason someone would turn down someone else.

    The attractiveness thing really comes from stereotypes that are portrayed through music videos, especially rap videos. Fun fact: 70% of rap is bought by white men. So, all those guys that are saying all this crap about black women, it's probably your fault they're portrayed like this, because the media conforms to its customers. Ok, I'm black, a virgin, no STDS, and I won't have sex until I'm married. I know the STD rate is high in black women. Look where slavery and racism put us. Black women are in the ghetto, with several siblings, and parents that are too busy working to pay attention to what they do. In Europe, there is not this problem, especially not in France, because they've heard of a little thing called "tolerance." Some people need to get some, on both sides of the racism issue. It's not the skin color; it's the demographic. In the ghettos and slums, there's always going to be vice, and there just happens to be a lot of black people in the ghettos and slums. Thank you, racist idiots. You are causing a cycle that cannot be broken between racism, horrible portrayal of the black community, and people conforming to the stereotypes.

    I have only dated white guys, but only because I don't know a lot of black guys. I mean, I look for personality before skin color. And I'm VERY selective, because there are so many arrogant guys in general. Of all races. And there are bitchy annoying girls of all races. It depends who you ask for preference, but I think the real reason is that white guys in the suburbs hear all the stereotypes, and believe them. It sucks, but what can we do? If you're gonna be rejected for your skin color, then the guys aren't worth it.

    • I completely agree with you. Black women definitely have it the hardest. I'm not even full black and I feel that way. I really hope things change...but I don't see that happening any time soon.

  • The posts you're seeing online about black women being unattractive are from people with extreme views who feel strongly enough about the matter to broadcast their opinions. The people who don't feel as strongly won't feel the need to post such things, which means you're rarely ever getting their side of the argument.

    Plus, there are a lot of negative stereotypes about black women. I've heard plenty of people (including black women) say that black women have attitudes, and white women are more submissive--that's an insult to women of both races. The media doesn't do much to stop the stereotypes either.

    But I'm white, and I live in a predominantly black area. I know plenty of really attractive black girls, and plenty who are in relationships. When I was in high school, the white kids mostly dated people from outside of school or each other since no one else really showed interest. In cases like that and the one you described at your school, I think it's a matter of being in the minority, and the minority just happens to be a particular race.

  • Oh honey, don't let this get to you. I think you need to understand that there is a difference for a man between being attracted to a woman physically and being attracted to a woman where you want to date her.

    Some of the white guys around you would loss their minds at the thought of having sex with you. Men love variety. They really are curious what all women look like naked. So a man can be immensely attracted to a woman, regardless of race, but he may not ever pursue a relationship with her.

    Men hate rejection. Women do too but men have to face it more since they are the ones asking out the other person. So what happens? Men become very logical about what choices they have to make. A guy may see you, think you are beautiful, but logically he thinks you only date black guys or their is a "cultural difference" (even if you grew up in the same culture) or he thinks that you may not be attracted to him. Men go for women they think they can get. Black women are very hard for most men to approach because they are stereotypically strong, confident, ball busters. And a lot of men, especially those in white culture, don't know how to handle it.

    A perfect example of this is my best friend and her sister. They are half black and live in a white community. Everyone says they look alike so physically they really aren't too different. And before you assume they are both models, they aren't. They are both pretty but average also. But my friend has been asked out by white men, Mexican men, black men, and Asian men. And she is currently with a Jewish guy. While her sister has never been asked out. Why? Because my friend is sweeter in personality. She is kind and gentle and compassionate. When we go out together, I just see her flash that sweet smile and those doe eyes at a guy and he melts. He doesn't care if she is purple, you can tell he is thinking up how he can pick up on her cause he thinks he has a chance now. But her sister is a hard ass. Guys are afraid to ask her out.

    I'm not saying you should change your personality. Just understand that a lot of the guys that know you may think you would never date them in a million years even if they find you stunning.

    So hang in there. One day a guy who is brave enough will step up.

  • oh good god. girl with your self esteem you really shouldn't have asked this question. I can definitely relate to how you're feeling. I'm a black girl (half white though) and I went to predominantly white schools and I remember feeling the exact same way. once I learned more about our history in this country, racism, blacks in the media, etc. I started to love myself more because I understood things a bit better. I have dated several white guys but I'm not so foolish to think most of them are into black girls. a hell of a lot of them are not attracted to us.

    you can see the racism in like half the answers on this page girl. that should speak loudly enough for you to understand that not everyone is on the same level mentally and ignorance is like a cancer pretty much killing one mind at a time when it comes to race and culture. do not obsess over this because it will break you. I know. the thing you have to accept is that there is virtually nothing you can do about it. just be yourself. sure, present yourself well enough but don't feel like every action has to be a direct contradiction to the stereotype held high for us. I'm very loud. I know this is a stereotype but its how I am and I'm not going to change that just because a bunch of ignoramuses think we are the loudest. if there aren't any white guys who like you for you then you'll just have to accept that. I'm sure one will though. almost all my black girl friends are or have dated white guys. no kidding. one of my black friends is obsessed with asian guys and dates them like crazy. I've seen it all really.

    • Thanks for your answer. I'm not loud but don't really seen what's so bad about being loud in the first place. Most people that are loud have a lot of confidence and guys are always saying they love confident girls. I'm not like eager to get white guys or any guy. I just notice an overwhelming amount of black women around me are single, and at school I notice not a lot of guys socialize with black girls. At my school I've only seen one interracial couple involving black girl.

    • Where are you from if you don't mind me asking? if you do that's okay lol

  • I don't think black girls are ugly, just like every other race, some white bitches are fugly lol Chinese, mexican, it don't matter all races have somewhat an ugly person... but I'm white, my ex who is also white told me him and his new girlfriend wanted to come kick it so I was like sure whatever, and he texted me like "She is black, don't be racist!" PFT as if I'm racist! he goes around calling his own "white" mom a Ni****. so this girl and him show up and DAMN, This girl was way pretty for a black girl, It just depends, take good care of yourself, your skin, and you are just as beautiful. Every race has their own unique qualitys that make them beautiful!

  • Sweetheart be proud of your culture...forget the asses that believe black women aren't attractive. I guarantee you that America is probably the only place in the world where you would be considered ugly. Black women have been known for being strong and somewhat domineering in your homeland but considering everything and the fact that they had to fight for everything then it is to be expected.

    Where I live in the Caribbean being a black women is more than the colour of our skin, here we are intelligent, gentle but firm when need be, wonderful life partners, proud mothers, leaders of countries, doctors, lawyers, humanitarians, teachers, artistes in every sense of the word and a beautiful people. Ignore them and remember that you come from a long line of women just like that.

    Not everywhere in the world is the standard for beauty long straight hair, a straight nose, thin lips, coloured eyes, fake breasts, skinny hips, collegen and a flat bottom.

  • I am a white female and I think that a lot of black women are absolutely gorgeous... the thing is why they don't have a long married relationship is because black women are very strong a very independent they won't stay around and put up with any bodys shit... ya know... And I mean that as the highest compliment... that is an excellent thing... very excellent thing... I would be building my self esteem on that you are a very strong beautiful black woman and you know what you want and you won't settle for less or let someone take advantage of you on the way to getting what you want. Black women are the mentally and emotionally strongest women I know and I envy them for that! You should feel very blessed... the right man will come along I promise some man down the road will worship you for your values and your bluntness and independentness...

  • I totally understnd how you feel about yourself ,even I'm not a black girl...I've got to say tht all this generalization came from those white media.The same thing in Asia,why do most people here tend to adore light/white skin a lot? Its because the media keep brainwashing tht white is everything.Just compare lightening skin product with tanning product(even now its getting famous),yet you can see which one used to be published on tv. So its obvious tht the generalization became even more stronger tho.About dating black girl I think most white parents don't really agree of this(my point of view).I have talked to LOTS of white guy and they tend to say they rather choose asian/Hispanic over black women and when I asked why the answer must be something like "its my preference"(even I know it has something to do with looks/skin colour)...But honestly I think tyra banks,selita ebanks,rihanna are more pretier than some white chicks,can you imagine if Kate Moss,Heidi and Miley have those skin colour,how will they look like? LMAO...Im rolling on the floor now.But those black celeb still can look stunning with those skin means tht they are pretty in any condition they r.The thing is they won't admit it directly.If you felt bad about this I'm going to say tht is not only you who facing this descrimination,in asia also the same thing happen for people who have dark complexion.Its regarded as low statue especially for the indians and chinese. First I used to blame and cursed Asian of having this kind of mind set thinking but when I think back its all started from western,n the Asian seems ATE their 'poison'. So wht you can do here is PLEASE IGNORE all those f***ing racist alien who keep making you felt low self esteem.Coz whtever you do and where you wanna run you can't do much about people mind set thinking.Wht you need to do now is just be yourself and don't ever change yourself for those retards.Again as I said,those media brought all this.Blck girls are pretty like other women as well,its just those KKK granbaby who object tht.Have a nice day;)

  • i don't know much about being attracted to any female because I am not gay buT I am a white female and I only date black men and I have asked the same question to a lot of black men and most of them say most black females have smart allek attitudes and are too loud and obnoxious an are gold diggers. (REMEMBER THIS WAS THIER ANSWER NOT MINE) I also think white men are too worried about what other white folks will say if they were to date a black female but where I live a lot of white men date black females well actually where I live all sorts of different people date different races. I feel like this wether you believe in god or you don't we all came from the same place so it shouldnt matter who you date as long as they treat you respectfully and love you . I wish you the best of luck and I hope you can find some one who likes you for you and not just what you look like even though you are probably beautiful and I agree no matter what color boys shold be last on the list of importance when in school.

  • im part black and I just want to say thank you for this question. I don't usually have a problem attracting the guys I want but I know it is an issue - narrow views on beauty and racism toward us. seriously though this question is astounding. I've never read so much anti-black women bashing and open racism in one place in a long time. bravo kids lol it really just shows you how far off we are from being the post racial utopia some people think we live in. racism is very real and in the hearts of many (dare I say most?) people who wouldn't usually admit to it in person. so that's why we have the internet :D

    i think european standards of beauty and the degrading of african beauty is at the heart of it. its everywhere. nappy hair? fix it? darker skin? ew. p*rn allows men to examine womens bodies easier and see the image of sexiness being promoted I think. also racism in the form of stereotypes and cultural superiority come in. we are stereotyped as having certain attitudes, certain habits. traditional ideas on female submissiveness and docility also play a part and how many bw these days don't fit that mold. lots of things. ironically, white women with the same personality traits that are stereotyped as being common in bw won't be judged as harshly. its just reality I guess in a world build on racism.

    • Thanks for your answer. I guess I just have to accept it because I don't see anything changing (it actually seems to get worse). That's why I get so angry when people say that racism doesn't exist and everyone's equal now. Only people that aren't affected by it would say that.

  • I have to admit that there are some very truthful, honest and educated comments regarding this question. So instead of repeating what has alreaady been said I will just comment on something that I do not believe has been brought up. Yes, most the peopleon this site may not be racist BUT their parents grew up in a different time and they may be. Most people care what their parents think and I have experienced white men that like me and think I am beautiful but have told me straight up they couldn't see bringing a black girl home to their families. For some reason Asian women are acceptable but not black or hispanic to bring home to mom.

  • well my boyfriend, who is white, has told me many stories about being with black girls sexually and relationship wise, and he just tells me that black girls have a smell to them that make them unattractive, all of them, not bad hygeine, or anything like that, its just black women, that is it. I don't know if this is answering your question, or anything, but I'm just telling you what I know. or what he supposedly knows. but he grew up in st. louis and grew up with mainly all black women and men. sooo...yeah. that's all I have to say.

    • Lol that's pretty funny. Just what does this magical odor that automatically makes black women unattractive smell like? How can he even know how "all" black women smell? What your boyfriend says sounds like rubbish. Surely you don't believe that right? If there is a smell that many black women of St. Louis share, then it probably has diet more than anything (meaning girls with the same diet will smell the same way, not just black girls). That's definitely the first time I've ever heard someone say that

    • Yet the supposed smell didn't stop him from f-cking those black girls did it? He's just tyring to make you feel less threatened by the fact that he prefers black women but settled for you. LOL

  • Honestly, there are a lot of people out there who are racist. And yes, I've noticed a lot of black guys like white chicks. Whatever. I've seen in my time as well a few men (white) who like all sorts of non-white girls. People are usually more confortable dating within their race though. There are many types of people out there. And the concept the black women are ugly, I've seen so many black stunners... oh well. I'm from Canada, if you're from the States things may be different, but that's my POV.

    • Yeah I'm from the States. I want to move to Canada. Yes, there are a lot of beautiful black girls out there, but they have to be freakishly beautiful to even be considered on the same level as an average white girl, but I really don't care anymore. None of the guys where I live would date me, much less marry me (even though I'm a cute girl and have a decent personality).

    • You're right people are more comfortable dating within their own race, but if they did go outside of their race a black girl is always their least favorite.

    • I'm sorry to hear it's like that in your community :(

      I know you're worried and self-concious but honestly you want people who are intelligent and know how to appreciate real worth and beauty to pay attention to you anyway. If being black is a good way to better ward off the idiots, take it as a blessing.

  • Black people have strong personalities. They are confident and outspoken. I think its because black people have to deal with coming from poor backgrounds than the other race counterparts and thus have to have a stronger personality to deal with difficulties in life. Things are not handed to them on a silver platter. They have to work hard to get out of the hood, get an education and a job and build life for themselves. Nothing is given to them or is made easy for them.

    They also have to face racism and preference being shown to others who are white or have naturally strait hair and fair skin. This is genetic for them but black people have to work for all of that by putting on relaxers and weaves.

    People should understand that's why black people have strong personality. Because of economic reasons caused by history and genetically they have course hair, dark skin, are curvy and have thick lips.

    Even if they are not beautiful in society's standards they are the ones with the most HEART and are SOULFUL. Black people are REAL. Sharing a black persons life journey can only make you more compassionate and appreciate life more. Live life to the fullest and savour every moment.

    Black people are beautiful and have beautiful souls! That's why they are rappers, poets and they are emotionally deep.. They have a lot to tell about life. They are gorgeous and magnificent.
    I should know I am black, intelligent, kind and just too beautiful.

  • BLACK GIRLS A BEAUTIFUL! I'm latino and you have full lips curves that are just amazing! I think the whole black race is gorgeous! I prefer black men over any other race, and as I said before black women are gorgeous so sassy and just sexy. Keep your head up girl stand up for you and others don't listen to idiots!

    • Thank you for your kind words and encouragement.

  • I don't think this is a very educated question. I am a black girl and I've had nothing but white and latino boyfriends my whole life, all of them good looking. I'm told by all races that I'm beautiful and I'm not saying this out of conceit but because it's obviously not about my race with them. Some people who have posted before me said it has to do with personality and I agree. I'm not the typical black girl but if you listen to pop culture, black culture, hip hop culture, black men and women are conditioned to look for all the wrong things in a potential partner. It goes much deeper than that of course...

    I see what you mean at the same time, one of my ex's who I just posted a question about ( link had a similar issue with me. He would tell me at the beginning of our relationship that none of his white friends had ever dated a black girl but 'no that never bothered him' and I excused it as him just being insecure about it because it's new... I just realized that there are some people who aren't cultured enough as children and therefore can't let go of preconceived notions, even if there heart is in it.

    Idk if you are black or not, I don't know if you specified but if you wanna date outside of your race, pursue it with rash abandon. Not everyone is a negative prick so if you ever wanna talk, add me and message me.

    • How is it not an educated question? Of course there are many black girls that do date interracially (my mom being one of them, because I'm only 1/2 black but I consider myself black), but in my area at least, the interracial couples involving a black girl are far less common than than the ones involving a non-black girl. In fact, I don't even see black girls with black guys as much anymore.

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    • Yeah I live in LA area and I have a friend that lives in San Diego area and she's black too and we only date white guys yet I haven't seen it very often I just know if it's something you want just go out and get it, be involved in all social groups but I really don't know. When my friend lived in Santa Barbara, a predominantly white area, white guys liked her but were afraid to date her. She still unapologetically went after what she wanted. Sorry if my post was insulting but what are you trying

    • To achieve from this question? if you really want to date interracially it shouldn't matter what other people think. just do what you want and have confidence in yourself and not some statistics you heard. if everyone listened to other people we'd be nowhere in this world.

  • Hey it's a big world out there and many men do like black women. I think most of it has to do with ignorance, who people where brought up around, values and stepping out of their comfort zone to not only date but understand and embrace another culture that may be so different from their own. I'm not the loud black girl people try to say black women are but who's to say we're loud they probably just talk too soft. It's mostly about how you see the world and what you were exposed to or taught. other than that it's up to men to date someone outside of their race. I think the whole comment someone made about bad attitude black women is all about their preference as a man and and what makes them a man and a woman a woman, gender roles. Some men like that attitude and see it as a challenge and a girl who stands up for herself. not like that but white society has almost always tried to make other women or white women look more attractive then us/any other culture. the fact is not all black women get married but that doesn't mean we aren't wanted, there are other issues of why we aren't married that are complicated. Don't let a society that is not dominated/run by you/people of your culture tell you you're not beautiful it jus doesn't make sense. It's their views not yours, odds are you'll get married just instill in the next black generation how beautiful they are and don't perpetuate feelings of inferiority. We need to be models and show our kids how beautiful they really are in a society that has only recently taken small steps to state that. Every culture is beautiful and you can't compare/contrast them because you just don't get the same from each. that's like comparing an apple and an orange now which one is better uhh they're different what do you like. America has promoted apple's more so are oranges nasty to all no are they uglier you can't compare based on anything sensible. Anyone who does sounds ignorant.

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