What are the differences between not interested behavior and shy behavior in guys?

I have been into this guy at work for sometime. He seems somewhat “girl shy”. For example the only people he talks to are other guys and significantly older/married women. He’s also not exactly the type of guy that most girls like, look for, or find attractive; the other girls at the office actually say “EW, gross!” in regards to him but I really like him anyway.

He stares at me a lot from across the room and he used to blush and look away quickly when I caught him. I started smiling at him when I caught him staring at me and he would maintain eye contact, blush, and smile back. I started saying hi to him and he would blush, smile, and say hi back (but it ook awhile to get him to even say hi back). He also walks by my desk a lot and always seems to be everywhere I am. So, I tried striking up conversation. He blushes a lot but his eyes are always locked on mine, he asks lots of questions about me, remembers basically everything I say, and is always very involved and keeps the conversation going. Most of the time I start the conversation or approach him. He’ll start conversation with me BUT only if I’m alone. The body language all indicates he’s interested.


I asked him to lunch one day but he had a meeting and had to say no. He blushed more than ever when I asked him and I know his reason was real and truthful and not just an excuse. But what’s confusing me is, he hasn’t come back and asked me out. In fact, it almost seems like he started avoiding me after I asked. My friends have said the ball is in his court and if he doesn’t come back and ask me, I should accept the rejection and move on.

I have been told by many guys that I can be intimidating (good looks, smart, successful). Is it fair to assume that if he’s interested he will come back and ask me even if he’s terribly shy? Did I possibly misread the signs and he is simply not interested rather than just shy?

What are the differences between not interested behavior and shy behavior in guys?
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