I have lost 40 pounds and my boyfriend acts like he doesn't even notice?

[Anonymous]

I used to weight 168 pounds and was extremely insecure. I hated everything about my body, except my face. I now am 124 and look great. but for some reason my boyfriend doesn't even act like he notices. he will go "aww you look cute" every now and then, but I feel like he is totally oblivious to my weight loss. a girl buddy of his can lose 10 pounds and he will go "wow you look great! you look so skinny!" but me, the woman he has been with for over 3 years get's no recognition. what should I do? should I try and lose more weight? what should I say to him? any advice would be very helpful thank you

[Tomboy]

I had the same thing except I went from 120 to 103 in 1 1/2 month during whice he didn't see me mush and my boyfirend never commented at all on how skinny I got... 4 months later I asked him if he even noticed that I lost 17 pounds he said that how could he not. Now I am back up to 109 pounds and he is trying to shove food down my throat every time I see him. I think he didn't compliment me on being skinny and losing weight because he is worried that I would think that losing weight is a good thing and continue doing it. I am a very healthy person and exersises about 2 hours a day on school days. I am only 5'2 that's why I weight a bit less than you. The reason I lost so much weight was because I went from 1h of weight training and 2h of rugby practice everyday to doing nothing for a whole summer and got also got the flu and had to starve myself for a bit cause I kept on throwing up xD Now I am weak and out of shape =( What I am saying is that he is probably just worried about you pushing yourself too hard trying to lose weight but doesn't want to tell you that he doesn't like what you are doing so he is just sayiing nothing... He dated you because he like you the way you are so you should talk to him on weather he like you better skinner... my boyfriend definately doesn't like me skinner... =)

communication is key so just have a heart to heart talk with him about this and it will also bring you two closer as a couple if you can tell him what's bothering you. It will be a weight off both of you chests ;D

[Asker]

Im 5'1...now I feel fat

[Tomboy]

My boyfriend wants me to be 120 =P

[Asker]

Lol I was jk by the way. =) but wow really? I think you look great the way you are!

[Tomboy]

Ya really everythime I see him he asks me if I was hungery at least 3 times and bribes me to eat at least twice xD and thanks I like the way I look too I think teehee

[Tomboy]

Your weigth / height ratio would be perfect for my boyfriend xD

[authentic]

When you have been with a person (actually anything) for years (sometimes weeks), it is difficult to fool yourself and pretend it is "sparkling new".

It is not your responsibility to please anyone, nor is it your responsbility to look at yourself through other people's eyes; that is the fastest way to wipe clean any happiness you have. Think about this. Do you see why?

It is your responsibility, though, to keep yourself happy. Any emotionally mature person knows that looking after his/her happiness is his/her responsibility, and no on else's. So, consider your losing weight part of your responsibility of looking after yourself well, and give yourself a pat on the back. It isn't easy to lose that much weigh.

[StudyinBones]

Don't lose more weight! I think the average weight for a woman is 140 pounds. I can tell you that after 3 years he is probably taking you for granted. Its happened to all of us. Does he see you everyday? When one of his buddies loses weight and he reacts the way he does, its most likely because he hasn't seem them for awhile. Maybe try coming out in lingerie and ask him "you notice anything different" or "you like what you are seeing" Us men folk can be a little thick headed at times and we need a smack up side the head.

[JohnGPL]

He might be taking you for granted a little bit. Tell him what you told us. You're angry that he isn't giving you the same praise he gives people who are just friends. Tell him you worked hard to accomplish your goal and you need to hear him say you look great.

[foolycooly1001]

Maybe he thinks he doesn't have to compliment you as much, since you have been together for so long. If it's that important to you, you should tell him. Say something like, "I have worked really hard to look good, and I wish you would compliment me more."