I have compeltely derailed my life? nowhere to go but up?

[Anonymous]

I went through years of ignoring my mental health, and in the process taking responsibility over others. This included personal and professional situations, that ultimately exhausted me.

In the process, over the years, my anxiety became bad enough to give me panic attacks, night terrors, among many other things. my depression took over my life, and self harm and suicide became common thoughts. I started to feel isolated and disconnected from the world, and couldn't seem to make relationships. Year after year things became worse, while so many others relied on me to be their rock.

Eventually I started having mini breakdowns, severe helplessness.. etc. I knew something was off, but assumed I could deal with it myself, I was terribly wrong.

One night in particular I lashed out against someone, destroyed that friendship, and was arrested for the first time in my life. Now, I am likely to have a misdemeanor, court dates, and large financial losses. Not to mention, my other emotional struggles are at their peak, where I struggle to even get out of bed.

I am working on it though, through therapy, medication, meditation, journaling.. the list kinda goes on, but it becomes exhausting. Sometimes it feel like my day is basically wake up, work on myself, go to work, work on myself, come home, work on myself, and sleep.

The only positive is, its only up from here? But it feels like I wasted 10 years of my life, just to find myself at rock bottom

Any words of encouragement, or advice?

[Oliverlogan263]

Dude, that sounds like a super heavy load you've been carrying for years. No wonder things got to be too much, you can't take on the problems of everyone around you and not expect it to crush you eventually. It takes guts to admit when you need help.

Don't be so hard on yourself though - you didn't "waste" those years, you were just doing your best to get through each day without the right tools. Now you're arming up with therapy, meds, all that good stuff. It's gonna be a process to climb out of that dark place, but you're putting in the work and that's huge.

Just keep reminding yourself that every little bit of progress counts, even if it doesn't always feel like it. And try to cut yourself some slack - healing isn't gonna happen overnight. Be proud of yourself for still showing up and fighting for your happiness. You got this man. Leaning on others can help too - we're all in this together. Brighter days are ahead!

You've hit rock bottom so the only way now is up. Think of how much stronger you'll be once you get through this. I'm here if you ever need someone to listen. Stay hopeful!

[Anonymous]

'I am working on it though, through therapy, medication, meditation, journaling.. the list kinda goes on, but it becomes exhausting.'

That list goes on because it is a trap. Notice how the list never includes aligning your body, soul and spirit while discovering your authority, power, gifts of the spirit and what it means to be an heir to Christ. Everything you mentioned comes under New Age and is about turning to man. But only when you turn to God will you truly find peace.

I should know. I've been through all of the meditation, self improvement, positive affirmations. The only thing that really helped was learning how to 'stop thinking' but only because it allowed more effective renewal of the mind to become more Christ like.

Everything you mentioned tells me that your spirit was crying out for acknowledgement.

[Asker]

I did a terrible thing :(
I feel so much shame, guilt, and humiliation for it...

[Opinion Owner]

Seeking forgiveness and renewing the mind is the best form of action.