Never marry the enemy!

KrakenAttackin

I clipped the quoted comments from a different message board, but I think it defines what most men want in a wife, but modern women are largely uninterested or incapable of providing.

"A man is looking for a partner, a team mate, a helper, a companion, not a grown child dependent".


"My wife cooked, cleaned, gardened, sewed, crocheted, helps vacation plan, made reservation, took care of the household budget, did the taxes, and was my BFF for life. See the movie Up. I had that relation with my wife. We did make it to to the Grand Canyon, Hawaii, Grand Cayman, Yellowstone, etc. We saved for retirement. We paid for our kids school to give them the head start. We kept our vows in sickness and in health, for richer, for poorer. I was unemployed twice during the Obama Administration. She had cancer twice and did not survive the 2nd round. Ladies and Men, Be prepared for marriage with it's responsibility and absolutely do not marry the enemy. A nuclear family has it's many advantages. Married to the enemy will destroy the family from within".

I have been bantering back and forth about how "relationships require hard work" with several women on GAG. I submit that a relationship should not be "hard work" and no man should tolerate a "difficult" relationship (speaking as a man who endured a brutally difficult and ultimately unsuccessful relationship for 20 years). Learn from my failings and mistakes.

Reading the above quote from the man who lost his wife to cancer, ladies, can you honestly say you can even begin to compare to this woman? If yes, I would love to hear your story as you are the kind of woman who will eventually help humanity out of the morality gulch we are currently suffering.

It is my belief that women set the tone for society overall. Men at our core want to please women, attract women, do for women, protect women, help women, and genuinely make women happy. Women have learned to leverage the core nature of men against men, which is given rise to excessive "Simping", which has been accelerated by social media, Go Girl culture, YOLO, etc. Women are more liberated, free, and equal than ever, but..... women are more depressed (1/2 of women admit to depression issues, with 30+ percent of women being on antidepressants for more than one year), than at any time in history.

The "misery index" indicates that women are less happy than at any time in recorded history. But how can this be when women are more educated, wealthier, more powerful ( financially, politically, socially, and through independence) than at any time in history. Why hasn't the penultimate freedom let to happier women? I have some ideas but I will let you digest this and come to you own conclusions.

So for those women who seek relationships but have the toxic habits common to "YOLO, Go Girl", etc., perhaps this will shed some light into why men reject you for anything but sex. Ladies, when you hop from man to man, engage in extreme attention seeking behaviour (social media obsession, ultra-sexualized behaviour and dress, tattoos, piercings) and engage in self-destructive behaviour (multiple sexual partners, drugs, alcohol, hard partying), when you have children by different men ("Baby Daddy Season"); you have become what the above quote author refers to as "the enemy". What does being the "enemy" mean? I believe it means a woman who rejects any kind of stability for herself, her children, and lastly a partner. The Enemy is hedonistic in the way a small child is, but with the body of an adult, is not capable of empathy, has no real depth of personality, compassion, or core moral compass. The "Enemy" seeks the trappings of a relationship and marriage, but absolutely rejects the necessary realities a relationship requires. The Enemy does not take responsibility for her actions but rather rationalizes them as "a phase I went through", or simply makes no apologies at all and believes her mere presence should be enough to satiate any concerns a man might have about a relationship with her.

Where will all of this end? Marriage rates are at almost 100 year lows with no sign of improving. We could talk about the court system, etc, but that is for a different "My Take". Every over-sexed video/photo you post, every tattoo you get, every piercing you add, every additional sexual partner, every hard night of partying; just pushes you FURTHER, and Further, and further..... away from forming a genuine bond with a good man who could build something special with you.

Are you the "Enemy"?
Are you the "Enemy"?

So I ask you ladies, are you the "Enemy"?

Never marry the enemy!
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Browneye57
    Excellent.
    The 'perfect wife' is what I currently have. She's ver. 2.0, now just over thirty years.
    She's not exactly perfect, but she adores me, cooks and cleans, IS my partner, shares in decisions, defers to me, respects and is in awe of me, thinks she couldn't life without me. And never says 'no' to sex.

    In turn she is spoiled beyond rotten, gets everything she wants, we go together everywhere, we are virtually inseperable.

    Don't settle, and don't marry the enemy. Make sure you're sexually compatible, make sure she looks good to you even without makeup - cuz you'll wake up to that mug for the rest of your life.

    Don't marry one that argues, claims she doesn't need you, wants her own space and own friends, takes selfies, and shops a lot. You'll be way sorry, I guarantee it.
    LikeDisagree 11 People
    Is this still revelant?
    • anykayd

      Is your wife 18?

    • Drzen

      The mug part is scary 😂😂 great advice

    • Browneye57

      @anykayd - My current wife is 7 years younger. She was much younger and prettier than wifey ver 1.0.
      Are YOU 18?

    • Show All
  • FatherJack
    Having carried a lazy , constantly complaining , argumentative lump through a crap marriage , then dumped her & became a single parent as a result , never again for relationships , I cannot be bothered with dating. Also single dads have no chance in the male heavy sausage fest " dating market ". Absolutely no negativity towards women , I am raising a teen daughter after all , I simply want peace & like solitude too much. My detached nature towards people is a blessing for me
    Like 4 People
    Is this still revelant?

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What Girls & Guys Said

1722
  • Rachelspiks
    Yes, I can honestly say that I am a much better person than the woman in that story, simply because I don't need someone else in my life to order me around in order to "feel complete", and can actually do things that are far more useful than some bizarre caricature of the "ideal" 1950's woman who is nothing more than a domestic slave, subservient to her husband.
    LikeDisagree 8 People
    • @Rachelspiks. You can do more useful things, like what twerk? Make a TikTok video? Do awesome double penetration? Amaze us with your "skills" as a modern woman.

    • Well, I can perform complex calculations in my head, fix my car when it fails me (although thankfully I drive a car that's very reliable), am an extremely fast typist, multitask, organise a team, inspire others, was at the top of my class in every class in school and university, and know just about everything about any topic you care to name.
      What can you do Kraken? Pull your cock? Post libelous tweets? Insult others, denigrate those you don't like and spread your misogynistic crap online?

    • BURN! Love your ways, Rachel xx

    • Show All
  • NicoletteXO
    Yes, 100% I can say I compare to this woman. In fact, what I offer would supersede it by a long shot. l However, most men cannot meet my standard. I'm not about to offer what I have to offer for a man who is quasi-literate (70% of men. And 70% of women, too), earns less than me in a job he hates and bitches about, who is sexually not all that, who has no conception of chivalry or masculinity - and who essentially desires a therapist and a free lunch. No thanks. There are a small percentage of men who I would consider eligible. I am not the enemy to any real man. In fact, I am devotional and adoring beyond words for the one who earns my surrender. My nature entails the desire to absolutely worship a worthy man - to dote on him, to care for him, to be his muse and inspiration. The thing is, most men do not undertake the proverbial 'hero's journey' these days to earn this level of devotion. They are too accustomed to instant free porn and video game dopamine hits. Many women are the same - it's not a gendered thing, but a sad indictment on our culture in general at this time. Men, please - come and prove yourselves, slay the dragon, and a good woman will be yours forever. Really. The sad thing is, I'm ready to hear some BS response about how I'm a "ho" (or some such other insulting slur) for this comment. I'm prepared to not be seen or understood for the level of sincerity and love that is actually entailed in what I am articulating. That is the level at which we are operating now. Tragic, really.
    LikeDisagree 7 People
    • Yes, definitely... it is a two way street.
      Noble, honest, high character women and noble, honest, high character men for the women too.
      A sleazy guy wouldn't be worthy of a high class woman.

    • @NicoletteXO. For starters we need to stop the war on boys and men.

    • KrakenAttackin - What "war" on boys and men?

    • Show All
  • zeitgeist057
    I just had this interesting epiphany as a result of a psychological survey/study being done in part at the local uni.

    They asked me a bunch of questions about times I felt good about myself or others, and times I felt bad as well. After answering the survey with some experiences, I did a follow up interview where they asked me in more detail to describe. I didn't realize at the time I wrote the answers, but when I was talking about them something came to me:

    1st there was an experience where I felt good. It was going to sushi with my sister and two friends, and picking up the check for everyone.

    2nd was an experience where I felt bad. It was paying for a mail box for the year that my ex and I share, but she reacted negatively to it.

    I realized that in both scenarios, I did the same thing, I was being generous. But in the second scenario, it was the negative reaction that made me feel bad. So it's me being consistent in who I am, but the reactions I get from different people can change how I feel about the events.

    So in conclusion, this has to do with "don't marry the enemy" because there are people out there who will make you feel bad for being yourself, even if you are being generous, they could twist it around and make you feel bad about it. So find and surround yourself with people who are grateful for you in who you are.
    Like 2 People
  • hi_it_is_me123
    Divorce rate is high among boomers or Millenials according to statistics. Newer generations marry wiser. Two decades ago Hollywood/Media was conservative and not feminist/liberal. So feminism did not have influence on the people who is responsible for higher divorce rate.
    If a single mum in her 50s wrote a similar take about men you would hate on her and blame her for her dating choices. So would you like it if i blamed you for marrying a crazy woman? By your logic you are at fault for choosing to marry a crazy women. Women get blamed for dating so called bad men but when we blame men for dating crazy bad women we get called feminazis.
    Since you are a single parent you are worthless as you always say this about single mums by your logic
    Men can't complain about hook up culture but also take part of it. If you dont like promiscuity why are promiscuos as a man? Why are watching porn, aka supporting sex work but also hate on them? You are the reason why they exist. Demand determines supply. If you dont want them to exist, dont support them.
    I also dont understand why people get triggered by promiscuos people. You dont have to date them but you have to tolerate them otherwise dont expect respect.
    I prefere virgin man like me. I am done when hypocritical promiscuos or non virgin men want virgin girls.
    By the way the divorce rate is high because people married because of societal pressure and marry young. I am from middleeastern/asain culture and if divorce was not taboo, majority of them divorce. I know so many couple who dislike eachother.
    The divorce rate is higher the bigger the age gap is and among people who marry young. Traditional people usually marry very young or marry someone who is much older than them.
    Both women and men should learn to reflect on themself. I am done with this gender war. Women ain't angels. Bad women exist like good women. Women are invidual. Many different women exist. So you can't generalize a whole female population
    LikeDisagree 6 People
    • Men should not complain abou so called easy women if they are easy themself aka have one night stands. Reducing women only to sex is like women using men only for money.

    • @hi_it_is_me123. No, newer generations are simply not getting married. The marriage rate is at 97 year lows. Has the divorce rate gone down, yes, but that's because the marriage rate has gone down.

      Men are finally getting the message.

    • Excellent piece.

      Love your comments:

      "Men should not complain abou so called easy women if they are easy themself aka have one night stands. Reducing women only to sex is like women using men only for money."

      "Men can't complain about hook up culture but also take part of it. If you dont like promiscuity why are promiscuos as a man? Why are watching porn, aka supporting sex work but also hate on them? You are the reason why they exist. Demand determines supply. If you dont want them to exist, dont support them."

      EXACTLY. How hilarious that these upstart men make accusations, yet seem not to be aware that their own shit stinks.

    • Show All
  • mistixs
    "My wife cooked, cleaned, gardened, sewed, crocheted, helps vacation plan, made reservation, took care of the household budget, did the taxes, and was my BFF for life."

    Plenty of women do this. If none of your girlfriends did this then maybe you're not looking in the right places.
    LikeDisagree 5 People
    • @mistixs. "Plenty of women do this"... yes, women 50 and older. This generation needs a GPS to find the kitchen. Modern women want to be married but don't want to be wives, and they want to have children but don't want to be mothers.

    • Kraken - Then find someone who is over 50 then! Stop complaining and actually do something positive with your life!

    • @Rachelspiks I am not looking for a woman, been there, done that. The idea is to educate younger men as to the dangers of modern woman. Also, women as a whole do not feel guilt, but you do feel shame. Shame is the only way women will ever change.

    • Show All
  • PikNik77
    I think any man and any woman, regardless of their lives up until that point, can make a go of it if they can remember two things. 1. Love her as you love yourself and 2. Relationships are cyclical. If you provide selfless love to her, an environment of safety free from judgment, and strive to learn her love language, she’ll most likely do the same for you.

    Early in my relationship with my husband, we did a study together called The Five Love Languages. It’s a short test that pinpoints what your love language is. Words of affirmation, acts of service, touch, quality time, gifts. Mine was words of affirmation. His was touch. I found that when I made a point of hugging him and kissing him often, and initiating sex between us, this equated to him feeling more loved. And he found that when he complimented my cooking or thanked me for taking care of our house and children, I felt more loved. The beauty is it’s cyclical!! If he gave me my love language I was more likely to give him his and vice versa. It becomes this beautiful circle of creating an environment for each other that feels safe and peaceful. Anyone can thrive and grow in such a place. It’s work, but it’s simple work.
    Like 1 Person
    • @piknik77 Selfless love tends to get men abused. Women have become so used to legions of Simps falling at their feet that they don't appreciate when a man genuinely cares for them.

    • PikNik77

      I really don’t think that is true as a general rule. Even the most selfish woman will come to appreciate that sort of commitment and will probably reciprocate. The most likely mistake in your scenario is that he is giving her HIS love language rather than hers. It’s a very common issue in relationships. We feel most loved when we are touched, so we touch more, but hers might be acts of service and touch might not even register, or, it might be a detriment due to past abuses. The selfless part here comes from you learning to recognize these issues and put forth the effort anyway. Even if she doesn’t respond, aren’t you building yourself up to be a better person anyway? Shouldn’t that register as personal growth? And whether you believe in God, gods, karma, the universe, WHATEVER, it’s most likely to come back to you eventually.

  • MzAsh
    I nursed my man back to health after an accident that left him confined to a bed and wheelchair for 6 months. During that time, I did everything. I was there for him when both of his parents passed away.
    I cook and clean (even though I hate cooking) when I have time but I don’t always have time because I’m working plus building my own business. So he’ll cook and clean too.
    Like 1 Person
    • @MzAsh These are the things spouses are supposed to do for each other but it has become a rarity.

    • MzAsh

      I think a lot of younger people don’t because life hasn’t really come at them yet. Wait until they get old enough and there’s no one else around to be there for them other than their boyfriend or girlfriend. Then their relationship is tested.

  • Subarugirl
    Dude we get it already, you think that all women are soulless leaches after your money... I think you have made your point.. more than enough times.
    LikeDisagree 16 People
    • Did you even read it?

    • Subarugirl

      Successful marriages take work and are hard sometimes, I never said that relationship should take hard work all the time that's not heathy. Nothing worth having is always easy.

    • @Subarugirl. Who should sacrifice more in a marriage?

    • Show All
  • doopayo
    This argument is so incoherent it gave me an aneurysm
    LikeDisagree 12 People
    • At 15 you are already on track to be the enemy. Well done.

    • doopayo

      You’re correct. Im the big anime boss, just you watch out. Once im full hp I’ll have the power to wipe out all the men and it will just be women ‼️

      *maniacally laughs*

    • @doopayo. Without men running the world you would lose your shit in a matter of hours.

    • Show All
  • jshm2
    Or to put it more succinctly:

    "Just being female doesn't mean you're wife material, nor does just being male make you husband material. There are a lot of skills and cues you need to learn to be successful at relationships".

    There, a TLDR for you.
    Like 3 People
  • RP_Blackburn
    Uh-oh! I don't know how to sew, and I have a tattoo! Looks like I'm the enemy. Thankfully, I haven't sought a relationship yet.

    Hey could you make a men's version of this take too? I'd like to know what kind of men are the ideal vs the enemy of the nuclear family as well.
    LikeDisagree 5 People
    • yofuknutz

      what the fuck get you from Brooklyn

  • kc_4308
    I wish you stoop calling me a modern woman ! I’m traditional and old fashioned despite I’m 33! I can cook, clean , sew, no tattoos, and no crazy piercings Too assume every woman is modern absolutely crazy!
    LikeDisagree 6 People
  • Kaamraj
    A century or even a few decades ago it was the case that women could not divorce their husbands because they were financially dependent on them, however this is not the case now. Still we find that vast majority (about 70%) of the divorces are filed by women. If men and women were unhappy at the same rate then it would have been 50-50.

    Women are exercising their options, and men are having to pay for that with the family court system, alimony, etc. So men should also exercise their options. That is refrain from marriage, don't give your commitment. Remember women have a biological clock which makes them want children in their late 20s and early 30s, while men are not limited by such a mechanism. Start using your advantages.
    LikeDisagree 4 People
    • Ohhh... I was so close to being on board with you, but then you took it into a totally different space than I was hoping.

      I agree with all this: "A century or even a few decades ago it was the case that women could not divorce their husbands because they were financially dependent on them, however this is not the case now. Still we find that vast majority (about 70%) of the divorces are filed by women. If men and women were unhappy at the same rate then it would have been 50-50.

      Women are exercising their options, and men are having to pay for that with the family court system, alimony, etc."

      But then you say men should exercise their options by refraining from marriage.

      But surely this is just a recipe for a perpetually fragmented society. If you acknowledge that women are leaving marriages because they are significantly less satisfied in their marriages than men, why not actually see what can be done to address why the women are not happy? Then they wouldn't desire to divorce. Not only that, but it would completely elevate the relationships between men and women. This would provide the potential for marriages to be of vastly higher quality than they used to be in the past, when (as you acknowledge) most women only stuck around and put up with awful behaviour because they needed to to survive.

    • @NicoletteXO Women are born survivors who are experts at extracting resources from men no matter the consequences to the man. Women don't feel the least amount of guilt literally sucking the life out if men and throwing them away, after all she is "entitled to be happy".

    • You sound like you've been burned, and you wish to remain perpetually bitter about that. I'm more interested in the opinions of someone who seeks solutions to heal the divisions between the masculine and feminine.

    • Show All
  • pleasestopthis
    Apparently one quality is sexual compatibility, according to someone. Just how can a woman be sure she's sexually compatible with someone without experiencing sex with him, and without getting her body count higher after she's discarded for "sexual incompatibility"? Just curious. And yes, marriage is at its lowest, but I think both men and women have contributed to it. Marriage needs mature people, not children playing house.
    Like 4 People
    • aliali8

      "Marriage needs mature people, not children playing house."

      this is soo funny. it made my day.

  • This_Is_My_Opinion8
    I am sorry your relationship didn't work.
    If I married the enemy? Well I lost three jobs in a spam of half a year. She stayed with me and believed in me that I would find a good job. During that time she was the sole provider. Still today she makes much more than me. Before we got married, after two years of relationship I opened up to her. Told her about my demons and my not so good past. She hugged me and gave me nothing but comfort.
    And she forgave some less good shit that I have done regarding other girls. I never cheated, but I did gave them more attention attention than I should and she forgave me.
    She truly loves me.
    At home she cooks, cleans and I don't remember the last time I wanted sex and didn't had it.
    She is my partner, my equal and never tries to be superior.

    If most girls are like this? Not the mainstream ones. The ones that care more about social media then with their partner. People need to learn to look past a nice pair of tits and know what a quality woman is.
    Like 1 Person
    • Sadly, women like that aren't mainstream...

    • Make sure you don't fuck it up with this one. Doesn't sound like you married the enemy

    • @TruthBringer You have one like that don't you?

    • Show All
  • Jouth
    oh thank you, I had plans to marry my enemy but this article saved my life, I will give you a million dollars and suck your cick
    LikeDisagree 4 People
    • Lol!

    • YOLO!

    • @Jouth. You go ahead and get married sport. We'll see you back here in a few years after the family courts have enlarged your rectum a few inches.

    • Show All
  • TrueConfection
    I can't sew. I've been doing all the rest on that list for the last 20 years and still counting. I'm under 50, I don't know what GoGirl or YOLO is, I don't have any tattoos, I only have 1 earring in each ear (no other piercings), my hair (although dyed) is a natural color, and there is only one time a month I will say no to my husband. I'm not perfect, but I'm not the enemy.

    My husband isn't perfect either, but he's not the enemy.

    Why is there an "enemy"? Why not just compatible or incompatible? The world is made up of all kinds of people and I admit there are some I love more than others.
    Like 4 People
  • Justneedtokno
    So you do hate? I thought you were just a straight person with a hard exterior.
    Like 2 People
    • @Justneedtokno. It's not hate, it's a perspective.

    • I am asking do you ultimately hate women straight up?

    • Why would you consider us enemies

    • Show All
  • Jamie05rhs
    Building a relationship DOES take work! If you're not willing to put in the work, then don't even date.

    HOWEVER, once you're in a relationship, it shouldn't be a battle. It shouldn't feel like every thing you do is being opposed by your partner and you're just fighting to keep the relationship alive. That's the definition of a toxic relationship.
  • meetkitty123
    I'm sorry for your lost 😔. May she rest in peace 💐.
    Like 2 People
  • MCheetah
    I don't have much to say. I agree with your sentiments.
    Too bad this damn site recommends these to me late as f*ck.
  • Seinna
    Men want different things in women... if you want a woman to take care of the house, do all the cooking and housework you should be willing to be the sole provider. Otherwise you share the chores. In my experience, most men want a working woman because they want more money in the household. I only recently found a man who's willing to let me be the housewife and it wasn't easy at least in my country... and no way am I going to take on all the cooking and house chores if I'm working full time just like my husband.
  • CaliSixx
    Maybe I'm just stupid but it sounds to me you're saying "wives belong in the house"
    Like I said. Maybe I'm just stupid
  • Andres77
    I'm happy that you got to experience an awesome love and I'm sorry she had to depart early.
    That clarifies a lot of what you've said in here.
    • To clarify, this was not my wife. I out the section I clipped from another person in quotes.

  • Charliefretz329
    I agree here, the common man is considered fodder in our female empowerment culture. He at his root seeks to care for women but is mocked and abused by women.


    Both partners in a relationship should seek to constantly contribute not 50/50 but both should give 100%. When one is working all day, the other should manage the home front. A man quickly tires of a woman who refuses to help and won’t show affection, A woman quickly tires of a man who refuses to provide. Standard gender roles do exist despite our insistence that they don’t. Appreciate them, and appreciate your spouse.
    Like 1 Person
  • siseñor
    mr crackhead, happiness can be found in ups & downs.
    LikeDisagree 2 People
  • Likes2drive
    Yeah unfortunately they won’t know that until it’s too late and learn the hard way
    Like 1 Person
  • Randalama
    You just described why they're not worth it but you'll tryhard anyway? You're your own worst enemy.
    Like 2 People
  • Hispanic-Cool-Guy
    The "enemy" or daughter of Satan as I like to call them are reserved for the wicked man.
    • Subarugirl

      lol what?

    • @Subarugirl: Its true though according to the Bible. God blesses the good and Godly man with a good wife.

      He curses the wicked man (Satan's son) with a total scum of a woman as punishment.

      Proverbs 22:14
      The mouth of an immoral woman is a deep pit; He who is abhorred by the LORD will fall there.

      Ecclesiastes 7:26
      And I find more bitter than death, The woman whose heart is snares and nets, Whose hands are fetters.

      He who pleases God shall escape from her, But the sinner shall be trapped by her.

      Psalms 128:1-4
      Blessed is every one who fears the LORD, Who walks in His ways.

      When you eat the labor of your hands, You shall be happy, and it shall be well with you.

      Your wife shall be like a fruitful vine In the very heart of your house, Your children like olive plants All around your table.

      Behold, thus shall the man be blessed Who fears the LORD.

    • Subarugirl

      Oh right the Bible lol

    • Show All
  • bamesjond0069
    Agree. Good post.
    LikeDisagree 3 People
  • JamesRandiDebates
    The modern female is unmarriable.
    LikeDisagree 4 People
  • Wester1967
    Are you an LVM?
  • iWantToCry
    I hate everyone equally
  • Wise4myage
    Sounds like sound advice, lol.
    Like 1 Person
  • Anonymous
    On point as always @krakenattackin. Preach it! Maybe something will get through.
  • Anonymous
    She's hot! I love 💕💕💕 her!
    Like 1 Person
  • Anonymous
    That's why you west should stop hookup , dating apps and friends benefits bullshit western women is so blinded by fuck culture that they can't decide what is good what's bad they are hoes but can't admit
    LikeDisagree 2 People
  • Anonymous
    Oof! This is gonna stir up some HATE!
    • Which will be well-deserved.

    • Anonymous

      @Rachelspiks LOL!

  • Anonymous
    Most women get enraged and insulted at the idea of occasionally having to cook, clean, or earn money, and outraged when you won't pay for their dinner, housing, car, and luxuries. I am done with them.
    LikeDisagree 5 People
    • Well, if you expect women to cook, clean and earn money when you won't pay for anything then they have every right to be outraged. That's called slave labour, not a relationship.

    • Anonymous

      @NicoletteXO Considering I paid for most of her expensive shit, what I asked was not unreasonable.

    • Ok - so you are not talking about women in general, you are talking about a specific woman that you were in a relationship with.

    • Show All
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