How at risk will you be for a divorce if you get married (by your age)?

[Anonymous]

The research on marriage, age, and divorce is pretty interesting and age is a hot topic here lately so thought I'd share!

*Before late 20s:
Studies show people who get married before 25 have a 50% higher chance of divorce compared to those married at 25. The risk for divorce goes down as the years go on, which makes sense due to maturity, financial stability, etc. Young couples are the highest rated for divorce, with one exception.

*Late 20s to Mid-30s
The best ages to get married, in terms of likelihood to get divorced, are 28 to 32. Similarly, replicated research shows the risk of divorce is lowest for people who marry in the late 20s to mid 30s, with the lowest risk for people who marry 30-34.

*Mid-30s and older
After 35, the risk of divorce starts to climb again, but is still much lower than the risk for those who marry in late teens and early 20s.

*Age Gap couples
Marriages with large age gaps are the minority, but they definitely exist! These have the highest rates of divorce. The risk is actually extremely high, with some research showing that a 20 year gap comes with a 95% risk of divorce. I expected it to be much higher than the rest, but it's actually extremely high. When the age gap is 30 years, they're 172% more likely to get divorced. Even just a 10 year difference means couples have almost 40% higher risk for divorce.

But of course, some couples beat all the odds!

Which category do you think you'll be in?

If all goes well, pretty sure I'll be in the ideal age range. If not, light a candle and say a few hail marys and what not for me :D

[AynonOMouse]

Those statistics also don't show how many men 30 + that refuse to get married again, but have successful exclusive long term relationships without splitting up. I think a lot of age gap relationships where the man is older, he refuses to get legally married again due to previous bad experiences so the success rate of those relationships is not accurately portrayed since the study only shows those that DO legally marry.
Anyways, most couples I've known, including relatives that had a successful relationship that lasted 20 to 40 + years had an age gap of 7 to 12 years most of the time and the ones I knew that had 3 or less years gap, not even one of them is still together. That was just from my experiences IRL.

[Asker]

There's probably research on that somewhere, and maybe definitely in the future if it isn't already. Good point! Marriage is just easier to track and tends to be a higher goal in society for many, though that is changing for some.

However, my hypothesis would be that if the long-term relationships in question involve cohabitation, children, and intentions for monogamy, the outcomes by age would probably be the same. The piece of paper doesn't change the dynamics happening in the relationships, you know? People make marriages, not just the piece of paper. If there's something happening between people due to age differences (or things correlated with age differences), whether or not they're married wouldn't change that much. If you're doing all the things married people tend to do, your outcomes would be the same from my pov. I can't see what would be different, unless the long-term relationships in question did not have those similar traits (people didn't have children and live together and intend to be monogamous). If anything, the rates of separation might be higher, as married people are statistically more likely to push through rough patches than unmarried couples. When you're bonded legally and still have a super high rate of divorce, it's likely to only be worse without the legal and declarative bond holding you together. Married people break up less because it's such a barrier and they have made a huge commitment. Without that, breaking up is relatively easy.

[Asker]

That's good for those couples you mentioned!

However, one issue with that is... we aren't sure if that's a reliable sample size. A couple that has been together for over 50 years likely grew up and got married in a very different culturally context and that comes with a variety of different contributing factors that may influence likelihood of separation. Back in the day, hardly anyone got divorced because women often had to rely on their husbands for support and had fewer options to provide for themselves in careers. Religion was a larger factor that held some marriages together, even unhealthy ideas about "never divorcing." Some of the research done here was showing that this super high risk is within the first few or several years. Meaning, many couples with high risks of divorce in the first few/several years won't make it anywhere close to 20 years, but the ones that do certainly exist.

[AynonOMouse]

My parents were 7 years apart and were married for 40 something years before my dad passed. My mom worked and had a little more money than my dad did. My grand parents were 11 years apart and lasted until my grandfather passed. The grandmother also worked. My aunt and uncle that are still both alive are 8 years apart and still married. They both worked up until they retired. She managed apartments before and then was a Denny's manager.
Three of my co workers parents have large age gaps and are still married. One was 14 years gap, and I'm not sure exactly of the t=other two, but they are more than 10 years apart.

The ones close in age (granted, only in my experience from what I have seen IRL) seem to split up pretty often. Even if they were both old (like over 50 when they got together)

[Asker]

Uh... why are you giving me examples? (Also, I just mentioned the issue with looking at samples from entirely different generations, but okay...)

Subjective experience is exactly that. Good for the couples who made it work! Divorce sucks so if they were able to be happy, fulfilled, and stay married, good for them... Research studies a much larger sample for more objective truths about what's happening in populations. Everyone knows someone who did something. My parents have been together since they were 16 and are now 55 - same age but they got married young. They're not the happiest couple, but this set of data was about divorce, not happiness, so they beat the odds. Yay for them! That doesn't really mean anything when we're look at scientific data that shows what's happening on a larger scale. Also, again, my parents got married a while ago so the survival rate of marriages within the first few years could have been different when they were married. That was over 30 years ago.

But again, good for those couples!

[WindAtMyBack]

Are those numbers for all marriages or for first time marriages?

People who get divorced once are far more likely to get divorced again. That drives the percentage of marriages ending in divorce much higher. There are so many second and third divorces that it almost doubles the average rate for all marriages.

So if the rate is higher for mid-30s and higher, does that include people who have already been divorced before?

[Anonymous]

weird. in Asian countries, age gap couples unlikely to get divorce. the young wife happily to be with their old husband.

other than that, make sense. but the marriage usually starts to shake after 3 years or 5 years marriage, then 15-20 years marriage. which means most couples in 40s - 50s years old tend to get divorce. either cheating, fed up with their partners, financial problems never get solve, etc.

[Asker]

I haven't checked the research data in any specific country, so I'm not sure. However, the culture is likely very different. This is based mostly on western countries. I think all this research was based on the United States. Sorry for not clarifying that.

[Asker]

*I haven't checked data from any specific Asian country

[Opinion Owner]

ah. I see. that's okay. :)

[Whatever2929292]

It depends on if two people really love each other or not really. Some people I feel don't really love each other. Or they did at one point but got too caught up in infatuation.

[chriscdi]

id be fucked

[Asker]

lol why?

[chriscdi]

cause im only 18, im not even finacially stable 😅

[Asker]

aha I meant like when you think you would like to get married I guess.

But yes, you would be at 18 lol

[chriscdi]

well i honestly have no hope on marriage but if i did find someone i qould say around 24 to 26